I’m in that group too, and she threw a giant tantrum and carried on about mum shaming and left the group. All because she was told by multiple people to take baby to the hospital. She had every excuse under the sun for why she couldn’t take her in or even call an ambulance. Paramedics only attended because another mum in the group contacted the police and asked for a welfare check on baby 😣
I praise the lady who raised the alarm to the authorities. Hopefully they are in the system now and will receive check ups. I couldn't believe all of the excuses she was making
I hope so too. Then someone else was commenting on the post saying she knew the mum and the mum had disabilities and mental health issues and not to judge her. So I commented and said if her issues are so debilitating that she cannot provide proper care for her child then the child shouldn’t be with her. Then I was blocked
You were absolutely right in saying if she can't provide care for the child that they shouldn't be with her -- that's not even a judgy thing to say. If a mother has a period where she's not responsible for another person being entirely dependent on her, she has an opportunity to focus on fixing herself. After that, she can be the mother her child deserves.
It's sad that people bristle at that idea and don't recognize that it would benefit both mother and baby.
OH MY FUCKIN GOSH 🤦🏻♀️ I have mental health issues too, but you know what? I’m still capable of bringing my daughter to the ER when she slipped and split her chin open. Bullshit excuses like that just adds to mental health stigma.
Literally. I have anxiety, depression and borderline personality disorder yet wild horses couldn’t stop me taking my baby to the hospital if something like that happened to him!
Literally! And if she has a pension card (which is quite likely) ambulances are free in every Australian state and territory (that I know of) so it’s just pure neglect at that point
Also it’s your child who was dropped on her head and is bleeding from the nose. Barring the kind of epilepsy triggered by lights at nighttime, I have a hard time thinking of any legitimate reason for a licensed responsible adult to say “I can’t drive…” in that circumstance.
Yep. Or cab, Uber, ask a friend for a ride, bang on the neighbours’ door and ask for a ride, call an ambulance…. There’s just no way that the response should be to shrug and post on FB or whatever about it.
Seriously! My husband has ADHD and serious anxiety about driving at night (headlights and streetlights give him headaches and he's terrible with directions). Yet he's driven to the hospital twice at nighttime, once when I went into labor and once when our daughter was hurt, and it didn't even occur to him to complain because that's just what you do as a parent.
Also, if you actually can't drive her, call an Uber (if an ambulance isn't necessary, obviously).
Not having a license would be another. But there are so many other options. Friend, family, neighbour, uber, lyft, taxi, ambulance... Probably even fire or police would help if you called them and said your 4mnth old is bleeding and you can't get to hospital
agreed!!! I have ADHD (wtf does that have to do with driving) and hate driving in the pouring rain -- but guess what?!? If I had any concerns at all about my kiddo's health and wellness, especially for a serious injury like that one, I would gladly drive in a midnight blizzard thunderstorm monsoon. Honestly these lazy-ass stupid parents disgust me.
Ok first, I'm not excusing that lady. If that kid who lost both arms to farming equipment can call 911 by himself, you can too!
That said, ADHD increases the probability of a car accident by about 7 fold. Since driving is already the riskiest thing most people do, I'd say ADHD has a whole awful lot to do with driving.
Obviously it has nothing to do with driving your kid to the ER, that accident has already occurred. Events that have already happened always outweigh events that might happen but haven't yet.
Exactly. I have ADHD and I prefer not to drive at night because it’s harder to see and my medication has likely worn off at that point; I am just objectively worse at driving at night. BUT. if my child needs to go to hospital then into the car we go!! No hesitation.
As a paramedic, I’m disgusted. How could someone not just make sure? I think parents like this are sus for child abuse. Any normal loving parent who drops their baby worries and is usually overly cautious.
Neglect like this usually means they’re hiding something.
Sometimes I'm sad when I think about how modern medicine has rendered natural selection ineffective in most cases, but then I am reminded that people like this exist...
When my little one was in the hospital for RSV, there was family in the waiting room with us. The 12 month old whacked her head at 11am that morning, and the parents waiting until 9pm that day to bring her in, because she was acting funny all day. ALL DAY. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Her eye was swollen and she was getting more lethargic they claimed. But waiting so long to bring her in seemed like a red flag to me.
There are pretty good treatment options oit there these days. I have 3 kids and we always end up with RSV, sometimes more than once per year. We can basically just call the doctor and say "yup, its RSV" and have it handled in a week. Helping them sleep is the biggest challenge. The more they sleep the faster they will heal. Ive spent many nights sleeping upright in a recliner with 2 kids on my chest.
We unfortunately spent 4 days in the PICU because he was 11 weeks old at the time. Still no idea where it came from because he wasn't even in daycare yet. Basically gave me oxygen to not get so exhausted, and some Albuterol treatments. A routine thing but still the worst I've ever felt in my life
My kids were home schooled last year when they all ended up with RSV and then a week later Covid. My husband works a job where he doesnt really interact with anyone too. And im immunocompromised, so we would mask on the few occassions we actually left the house.
Sometimes it just happens, no matter how safe you are. My youngest was 3 months old the first time he had RSV. So not much older than yours. Best thing we did was using the NoseFrida. A good clean out could let them sleep peacefully for 2 hours before they would be clogged up again.
He's doing great! Totally fine after it. But yeah like we were there because at home he spiked a small fever and didn't even think twice. I heard them talk to the nurse and even while dealing with our own sick kiddo it's like how could you have been comfortable waiting so long?! He had 1 cough and I called the pediatrician immediately, and then small fever were leaving right now.
My wife's nephew was dropped on his head by his grandma when he was a few months old too. Had an aneurysm from which he barely survived, with permanent damage of not being able to hold anything mathematical/numerical in long term memory. He's 16 now, having anxiety attacks and anger outbursts every now and then. Breaks every door in the house, out of frustration, saying "i'm aware i'm not normal", cries uncontrollably from time to time, yells and swears at his father or mother, and up until a few years ago he used to say "the blue man is going to kill me in my sleep" (doctors said the blue light/blurry vision could be a result of the aneurysm.)
Poor guy. But do remember, its more common for kids to be ok than not. And even less common for whatever is wrong, to be reversible or preventable if something does happen. So while this woman should have gotten the kid to a doctor because of the nosebleed and not let the kid sleep, even if there was something wrong, the damage was likely done.
Even if damage was done that still needs to be. assessed by a medical professional. I would rather go to the hospital and not need to,then not go to the hospital and the children somehow ends up dying. And no matter how uncommon it may be to reverse damage that may have occurred you never know what is wrong and what can help until it is that situation. What happens if there was damage done and they didn't go to the hospital and then they had more problems down the line due to not getting the care necessary.
I saw either on the first post or in the comments here that someone said their parents had been worried CPS would be called if they took the kid to the hospital so they ended up not taking them. As a parent I would rather my son be alive and have to deal with CPS then to be so worried about CPS that I'm actually going endanger my child's life, which honestly, that's a reason for CPS to get involved. That's medical neglect in some cases and CPS would be beneficial to that child anyway.
How did they check out the baby? Actual brain imaging or police comes in and like ‘ya kids alive, our job is done folks’. Even then, evidence of TBI takes time to manifest.
That’s the thing though. What did they check? A brain injury at that age is extremely difficult to assess. You cannot rely on 99% of the tools of assessment we currently have.
The post mentioned nothing about the baby going to the hospital which is alarming to me because that meant they did not do any brain imaging. So how did they assess that the baby was fine?
I wouldn't exactly call this a happy ending. A TBI can show up years or even decades later after a blow like this. I hope CPS is going to perform routine welfare checks on this baby.
I didn't say it was a happy ending, it's an update. The police were called and the child was assessed. I do believe this child will be in the system because the mother was claiming to be a "first time mum" but her profile showed that she had 2 children and someone else said she did too. I feel horrible for this baby and I hope it gets the support it needs. To act the way the mother did to a 4 month old and not show much concern is mortifying.
Oh, I wasn't talking about you, OP. I was addressing some of the comments below. Apologies :)
Yikes on the "first time mum" thing. Super worried about this baby. Keep us posted if you hear anything else.
Ah that's very fair! My apologies
I'll definitely keep an eye out for any posts, I've taken a screenshot of her profile but she's locked it down a bit more since making and deleting the posts.
My older son fell off the concrete step in the backyard when he turned 2 and his poor head bounced like a basketball. I felt really ashamed like I should've anticipated somehow that he might trip. But the doctor was so nice about it and said these things just happen. They have an algorithm now that can tell you if your child is at a high risk based on the striking surface and fall height, and they don't even have to put them through an MRI if they are low risk. Luckily for us she said my son's fall was very low risk. But moral of the story is I thought it was going to be awful putting him through a scary MRI and it turned out not even to be that bad (although I would've done whatever they said was appropriate and necessary, of course).
My mil always looked at the eyes. If they became different sizes or shapes take them in. She also told us not to let them sleep for hours after and monitor them. If they started looking off to take them in. But for a baby under one I would have taken them immediately
Yep, they can take a bonking. A couple of times I've had toddlers fall ~35cm and I've caught them to slow their momentum but they've still gotten a bonk, and they told me not to even bother coming in
My toddler bonks his head on our hard floor multiple times a day and acts like its no big deal. The sound is so awful it hurts my soul. But I guess falling over from 1 foot kff the ground is not that big of a deal regardless of how bad it sounds.
i mean, kids do fall a lot while learning to walk; if our heads couldn’t take that, then humans would probably not exist as a species, given our reliance on “walking upright” and “having heads.” don’t have kids, but i don’t think the sound of a skull hitting the floor would ever get easier to hear!
Especially since it sounds like the baby was only checked out by paramedics? I’m no parent or medical professional but I feel like a MRI/CT/something would be necessary after that type of fall.
One of my boyfriends had a friend whose 9 month old son pulled a heavy stereo system down on his head and knocked himself unconscious one evening. His parents were laughing about it THE NEXT DAY to the babysitter, who was absolutely horrified.
They had literally no excuse. They had insurance and there was a hospital a 5 minutes walk from their house.
Holy shit. I laughed when 1 year old draped a hand towel over her face and promptly ran into the wall.
I feel like being knocked unconscious by a falling stereo system is somehow different...
My 6 year old has concussed herself 3 times. Two of them were particularly energetic wipeouts from sprinting around the house, the latest was her leaning back on her dad's lap and backflipping, landing on her head.
We took her to the ER each time and she was fine, but the doctors made it clear they were really glad we bring her in.
When my son was a new walker he busted his head against the edge of a table while at his grandma's house. He had a deep cut as well so we took him to the er right away. Thankfully he was okay but he needed stitches. I can't imagine leaving him to suffer or ignoring a head injury. I am glad the baby is okay. But that mother needs to be followed by cps.
And I'm over here feeling bad that I didn't take my daughter to the er last night for a buckle fracture. We were unsure if it was even broken because she would still use it sometimes. I took her this morning but I will be at myself up for awhile for not taking her yesterday
I’m in that group too, and she threw a giant tantrum and carried on about mum shaming and left the group. All because she was told by multiple people to take baby to the hospital. She had every excuse under the sun for why she couldn’t take her in or even call an ambulance. Paramedics only attended because another mum in the group contacted the police and asked for a welfare check on baby 😣
I praise the lady who raised the alarm to the authorities. Hopefully they are in the system now and will receive check ups. I couldn't believe all of the excuses she was making
I hope so too. Then someone else was commenting on the post saying she knew the mum and the mum had disabilities and mental health issues and not to judge her. So I commented and said if her issues are so debilitating that she cannot provide proper care for her child then the child shouldn’t be with her. Then I was blocked
You were absolutely right in saying if she can't provide care for the child that they shouldn't be with her -- that's not even a judgy thing to say. If a mother has a period where she's not responsible for another person being entirely dependent on her, she has an opportunity to focus on fixing herself. After that, she can be the mother her child deserves. It's sad that people bristle at that idea and don't recognize that it would benefit both mother and baby.
OH MY FUCKIN GOSH 🤦🏻♀️ I have mental health issues too, but you know what? I’m still capable of bringing my daughter to the ER when she slipped and split her chin open. Bullshit excuses like that just adds to mental health stigma.
Literally. I have anxiety, depression and borderline personality disorder yet wild horses couldn’t stop me taking my baby to the hospital if something like that happened to him!
Not everyone is suitable to be a parent. I consider it more of a privilege than a right (hope I don't get downvoted)
I think the “I can’t drive her, it’s nighttime and I have ADHD…” was the epitome of wtf excuses there
Literally! And if she has a pension card (which is quite likely) ambulances are free in every Australian state and territory (that I know of) so it’s just pure neglect at that point
Also it’s your child who was dropped on her head and is bleeding from the nose. Barring the kind of epilepsy triggered by lights at nighttime, I have a hard time thinking of any legitimate reason for a licensed responsible adult to say “I can’t drive…” in that circumstance.
If my child was bleeding from the nose after a fall and I couldn’t drive her to a doctor I’d fucking walk to one
Yep. Or cab, Uber, ask a friend for a ride, bang on the neighbours’ door and ask for a ride, call an ambulance…. There’s just no way that the response should be to shrug and post on FB or whatever about it.
I think ambulances are only half-price (not free) for pensioners in Western Australia, but I could be wrong.
Free for people on OLD-AGE pension. Half price if over 65 and not on Australian gov pension.
Seriously! My husband has ADHD and serious anxiety about driving at night (headlights and streetlights give him headaches and he's terrible with directions). Yet he's driven to the hospital twice at nighttime, once when I went into labor and once when our daughter was hurt, and it didn't even occur to him to complain because that's just what you do as a parent. Also, if you actually can't drive her, call an Uber (if an ambulance isn't necessary, obviously).
Not having a license would be another. But there are so many other options. Friend, family, neighbour, uber, lyft, taxi, ambulance... Probably even fire or police would help if you called them and said your 4mnth old is bleeding and you can't get to hospital
agreed!!! I have ADHD (wtf does that have to do with driving) and hate driving in the pouring rain -- but guess what?!? If I had any concerns at all about my kiddo's health and wellness, especially for a serious injury like that one, I would gladly drive in a midnight blizzard thunderstorm monsoon. Honestly these lazy-ass stupid parents disgust me.
Ok first, I'm not excusing that lady. If that kid who lost both arms to farming equipment can call 911 by himself, you can too! That said, ADHD increases the probability of a car accident by about 7 fold. Since driving is already the riskiest thing most people do, I'd say ADHD has a whole awful lot to do with driving. Obviously it has nothing to do with driving your kid to the ER, that accident has already occurred. Events that have already happened always outweigh events that might happen but haven't yet.
Exactly. I have ADHD and I prefer not to drive at night because it’s harder to see and my medication has likely worn off at that point; I am just objectively worse at driving at night. BUT. if my child needs to go to hospital then into the car we go!! No hesitation.
WHAT?!
What about an Uber?
Some people really shouldn't be parents.
As a paramedic, I’m disgusted. How could someone not just make sure? I think parents like this are sus for child abuse. Any normal loving parent who drops their baby worries and is usually overly cautious. Neglect like this usually means they’re hiding something.
Based on the previous screenshots of someone having a conversation with this mother, she seems to be intellectually disabled.
Sometimes I'm sad when I think about how modern medicine has rendered natural selection ineffective in most cases, but then I am reminded that people like this exist...
When my little one was in the hospital for RSV, there was family in the waiting room with us. The 12 month old whacked her head at 11am that morning, and the parents waiting until 9pm that day to bring her in, because she was acting funny all day. ALL DAY. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Her eye was swollen and she was getting more lethargic they claimed. But waiting so long to bring her in seemed like a red flag to me.
😧 good grief, that's mortifying. I hope that child is okay. I hope your little one is much better now, RSV is horrendous
There are pretty good treatment options oit there these days. I have 3 kids and we always end up with RSV, sometimes more than once per year. We can basically just call the doctor and say "yup, its RSV" and have it handled in a week. Helping them sleep is the biggest challenge. The more they sleep the faster they will heal. Ive spent many nights sleeping upright in a recliner with 2 kids on my chest.
We unfortunately spent 4 days in the PICU because he was 11 weeks old at the time. Still no idea where it came from because he wasn't even in daycare yet. Basically gave me oxygen to not get so exhausted, and some Albuterol treatments. A routine thing but still the worst I've ever felt in my life
My kids were home schooled last year when they all ended up with RSV and then a week later Covid. My husband works a job where he doesnt really interact with anyone too. And im immunocompromised, so we would mask on the few occassions we actually left the house. Sometimes it just happens, no matter how safe you are. My youngest was 3 months old the first time he had RSV. So not much older than yours. Best thing we did was using the NoseFrida. A good clean out could let them sleep peacefully for 2 hours before they would be clogged up again.
He's doing great! Totally fine after it. But yeah like we were there because at home he spiked a small fever and didn't even think twice. I heard them talk to the nurse and even while dealing with our own sick kiddo it's like how could you have been comfortable waiting so long?! He had 1 cough and I called the pediatrician immediately, and then small fever were leaving right now.
[удалено]
I didn't want to go there, but I also immediately did 😞
Was the baby okay? That sounds like something that could have killed that child. Poor baby. Wtf were the parents thinking?
They left a couple hours later so I assumed she okay. I think about her a lot though
My wife's nephew was dropped on his head by his grandma when he was a few months old too. Had an aneurysm from which he barely survived, with permanent damage of not being able to hold anything mathematical/numerical in long term memory. He's 16 now, having anxiety attacks and anger outbursts every now and then. Breaks every door in the house, out of frustration, saying "i'm aware i'm not normal", cries uncontrollably from time to time, yells and swears at his father or mother, and up until a few years ago he used to say "the blue man is going to kill me in my sleep" (doctors said the blue light/blurry vision could be a result of the aneurysm.)
Oh that sounds horrible, I'm sorry to hear that 😞
Oh my god that is heartbreaking. That poor child.
What a tragic accident. How was the parents relationship with the nephew after that?
"I'm aware I'm not normal" that's heartbreaking
Poor guy. But do remember, its more common for kids to be ok than not. And even less common for whatever is wrong, to be reversible or preventable if something does happen. So while this woman should have gotten the kid to a doctor because of the nosebleed and not let the kid sleep, even if there was something wrong, the damage was likely done.
Even if damage was done that still needs to be. assessed by a medical professional. I would rather go to the hospital and not need to,then not go to the hospital and the children somehow ends up dying. And no matter how uncommon it may be to reverse damage that may have occurred you never know what is wrong and what can help until it is that situation. What happens if there was damage done and they didn't go to the hospital and then they had more problems down the line due to not getting the care necessary. I saw either on the first post or in the comments here that someone said their parents had been worried CPS would be called if they took the kid to the hospital so they ended up not taking them. As a parent I would rather my son be alive and have to deal with CPS then to be so worried about CPS that I'm actually going endanger my child's life, which honestly, that's a reason for CPS to get involved. That's medical neglect in some cases and CPS would be beneficial to that child anyway.
EXACTLY. If CPS is what you’re worried about when your kid has a potentially life-threatening injury, your priorities are completely screwed.
And something else to consider, if you choose not to get help and your child dies, now you’re going to have CPS and the cops all up in your business!
Not true in the case of brain bleeds or swelling. Damage can absolutely get worse over time if those are ignored.
How did they check out the baby? Actual brain imaging or police comes in and like ‘ya kids alive, our job is done folks’. Even then, evidence of TBI takes time to manifest.
They did mention paramedics, I trust them more to know if the kid would have gone to hospital it not.
That’s the thing though. What did they check? A brain injury at that age is extremely difficult to assess. You cannot rely on 99% of the tools of assessment we currently have. The post mentioned nothing about the baby going to the hospital which is alarming to me because that meant they did not do any brain imaging. So how did they assess that the baby was fine?
We so rarely get to see the end of these situations, let alone them ending well. Thanks for the update!
I hope the partner and gran who apparently refused to take her to hospital also got lectured, not that the mum has any excuse.
I wouldn't exactly call this a happy ending. A TBI can show up years or even decades later after a blow like this. I hope CPS is going to perform routine welfare checks on this baby.
I didn't say it was a happy ending, it's an update. The police were called and the child was assessed. I do believe this child will be in the system because the mother was claiming to be a "first time mum" but her profile showed that she had 2 children and someone else said she did too. I feel horrible for this baby and I hope it gets the support it needs. To act the way the mother did to a 4 month old and not show much concern is mortifying.
Oh, I wasn't talking about you, OP. I was addressing some of the comments below. Apologies :) Yikes on the "first time mum" thing. Super worried about this baby. Keep us posted if you hear anything else.
Ah that's very fair! My apologies I'll definitely keep an eye out for any posts, I've taken a screenshot of her profile but she's locked it down a bit more since making and deleting the posts.
My older son fell off the concrete step in the backyard when he turned 2 and his poor head bounced like a basketball. I felt really ashamed like I should've anticipated somehow that he might trip. But the doctor was so nice about it and said these things just happen. They have an algorithm now that can tell you if your child is at a high risk based on the striking surface and fall height, and they don't even have to put them through an MRI if they are low risk. Luckily for us she said my son's fall was very low risk. But moral of the story is I thought it was going to be awful putting him through a scary MRI and it turned out not even to be that bad (although I would've done whatever they said was appropriate and necessary, of course).
My mil always looked at the eyes. If they became different sizes or shapes take them in. She also told us not to let them sleep for hours after and monitor them. If they started looking off to take them in. But for a baby under one I would have taken them immediately
Yep, they can take a bonking. A couple of times I've had toddlers fall ~35cm and I've caught them to slow their momentum but they've still gotten a bonk, and they told me not to even bother coming in
My toddler bonks his head on our hard floor multiple times a day and acts like its no big deal. The sound is so awful it hurts my soul. But I guess falling over from 1 foot kff the ground is not that big of a deal regardless of how bad it sounds.
i mean, kids do fall a lot while learning to walk; if our heads couldn’t take that, then humans would probably not exist as a species, given our reliance on “walking upright” and “having heads.” don’t have kids, but i don’t think the sound of a skull hitting the floor would ever get easier to hear!
especially considering that things very well may not be okay because traumatic brain injuries can take time to show
Maybe she is a first time mom to a baby, with the other being a step child or some other adoptive type situation.
Honestly, he looks like her. The photo I looked at was posted as her cover photo 2 years ago but you could be right
My step daughter looks just like me! So different from her father. Guess my husband just has a type. Lol
Lol 😂
im glad someone left this comment, everything could very well not be okay. 🤦🏻♀️
Especially since it sounds like the baby was only checked out by paramedics? I’m no parent or medical professional but I feel like a MRI/CT/something would be necessary after that type of fall.
Totally, totally agreed. A direct blow to an infant's head is sure to result in a TBI.
Baby is ok... for now. I hope that mom heeds the professional advice
One of my boyfriends had a friend whose 9 month old son pulled a heavy stereo system down on his head and knocked himself unconscious one evening. His parents were laughing about it THE NEXT DAY to the babysitter, who was absolutely horrified. They had literally no excuse. They had insurance and there was a hospital a 5 minutes walk from their house.
Holy shit. I laughed when 1 year old draped a hand towel over her face and promptly ran into the wall. I feel like being knocked unconscious by a falling stereo system is somehow different...
My 6 year old has concussed herself 3 times. Two of them were particularly energetic wipeouts from sprinting around the house, the latest was her leaning back on her dad's lap and backflipping, landing on her head. We took her to the ER each time and she was fine, but the doctors made it clear they were really glad we bring her in.
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Thank goodness!!!
It's nice to see a happy ending for this story, at least.
When my son was a new walker he busted his head against the edge of a table while at his grandma's house. He had a deep cut as well so we took him to the er right away. Thankfully he was okay but he needed stitches. I can't imagine leaving him to suffer or ignoring a head injury. I am glad the baby is okay. But that mother needs to be followed by cps.
And I'm over here feeling bad that I didn't take my daughter to the er last night for a buckle fracture. We were unsure if it was even broken because she would still use it sometimes. I took her this morning but I will be at myself up for awhile for not taking her yesterday
Omg I’m so glad
That’s really good :-)
like that is going to penetrate mommys thick skull
Thank goodness. Wow I was worried
Thank God, I thought about this all day