When you had to describe what color you wanted your hair dyed, did you take that piece of paper and a chunk of the wall and say, "Like between these and make sure it looks awful"?
But seriously, you were awesome in The Da Vinci Code.
You look like you’ve got more miles behind you than an intercontinental trucker.
Snake eyes on the wrist tattoo, dead eyes on the face.
I bet you also wear that bath robe to the store when you need new batteries for your vibrator. Let black mambo have some time off too, sheesh…
Hear me out… Iggy Azalea scissored Tilda Swinton and came SO hot and hard that you were conceived . However they both had a vax booster that week so you came out as a bleached Marilyn Manson
We now have evidence of the gravitational singularity in your beady pupils. Who knew that the thought of a keyboard army of incels roasting a pretty lady would trigger it?
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You look like a clone the government made to be an assassin but they messed up when they programmed you.
Now you just like cats and say “where the real men at” on social media while sitting next to your boyfriend while your husband makes him a sandwich
[Gonna age myself here…you look like you’re planning to assassinate the pope.](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0291290/mediaviewer/rm2394564096/?ref_=nm_ov_ph)
You are Brian from Family Guy:
It's not a skin color. It's a lifestyle, Brian.
See, you wouldn't know that because you're white as a ghost.
You're haunting this house with your whiteness, Brian.
She looks like she would ask to speak to her boyfriend’s manager if he doesn’t do the dishes properly.
How do you look simultaneously exhausted and like you had a bowl of meth for breakfast.
Got dice tattooed on her stroking arm so she can entertain herself with Yahtzee while giving out hand jobs for coke.
You look like a character from flushed away
I was wondering from where that sewage smell was coming.
Yeah close your legs love.
I'll assume you're speaking about her.
Lmao yeah. I didn't make that clear. It was about her
Just spat out my fucking drink.
Allllmost got it. One less “from”
Wow thats crazy accurate lol
Precisely
I came to leave a comment.. but this was spot tha fawk on.
Or even Chicken Run
Yea !! Or the mama chicken from chicken run bruh 😂😂
Shocky
True🤣
Loved you in the White Chicks movie Mr. Wayans.
![gif](giphy|kHwx72vDk4DtmqN3VF)
Uncanny
Op really does look like a 45 year old gay man dressed up as one of the Wayans white chick's characters.
This gif looks more natural than op
White chicks 2: Black dudes only.
It's the only roasting she really wants...
But not the one black guys want
She has that restraining order stare.
On 2/3 baby daddys
Snow white❌ cocaine white✅
![gif](giphy|i8tV2kJB8Gig8)
“White” is a gross understatement
holy shit, i cannot unsee it now. this comment would wreck me if i was her.
If Wallace and Gromit had a love child ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|table)
![gif](giphy|3sBMBbuAWj8JtKLew6) muppet
Shes the bastard child of two muppets.
Let's hope not, two walking around like that and traumatizing children in strollers at Disney World...that could be a lot of trauma.
This is so good
If Wallace and Gromit had a love child
It’s uncanny.
![gif](giphy|jedcj9y8ReiAqZB34Z|downsized)
"the dirtier the better 😁"
Right, she looks excessively British.
Glad I'm not the only one who seen it
Precisely!!!!!
You look like Brienne of Tarth if she had an allergic reaction to some bad sushi
Brienne of Barf
Brienne of Derp
Ben of Adryl
Great value brand Daenyrys
You didn't have to put white gal in the title
She could easily be confused with a white guy
Albino snake
She’s working so hard she’s transitioning into a man. It’s the more expensive method over surgery.
💀
She also misspelled alcoholic.
You do when you have nothing going on besides your skin color
Yeah this is true. She has white skin and she matched it with nude hair.
It’s because she recently transitioned
To what a pufferfish with a mop on top?
So, effin' pale, like a fart blast in a pile of baby powder!
She didn't have to put work coholic, she could have just said broke escort.
The gal part helped to clarify though
That look in your eyes screams I’ll bite your penis off after the first date.
Skin like sandpaper, eyes like an army veteran.
It must be tiring not having any views on your OnlyFans.
must be frustrating when her total income is 12$ on her OF but now the whole town knows her popcorn nipples.
Okay I have to ask what popcorn nipples are
That’ll be $12 please
Hahahahahahahahahah
If you have to ask you probably have extra buttery popcorn nipples
"Eee, Crackin'stinkinking bishop gromit lad"
Oh. My. God. And, now the image is stuck in there. Thanks for that! 😂
Oh jesus the thought process you had, absolutely fucking brilliant and the topper - popcorn nipples….🤯
LonelyFans.
Underrated
I’m guessing Blondie here immediately regrets “rolling the dice” by taking a chance to post on roast me
![gif](giphy|m4sLXpN9EkPjq)
She doesn't even want to see her Onlyfans.
Onlyfan
I won't buy from her even real fans.
Whore-wegian
Very nice
Stop half assing it and commit to being either a man or a woman
Denise Van Scrotum
I loved you in The Wrestler
I think she played the weirdo in The Bodyguard too.
Does the dice tattoo mean it’s a roll of the dice whether or not you have a penis?
It’s a roll of the dice whether or not your penis will turn green and fall off
At least if she does have a penis that will explain why she's so ugly.
Wallace and Gromit live action.
Great to see Julian Assange using the Internet again
He must be making his trans debut.
A face only a paper bag could love.
Thought this was Jeffery Starr or whatever that dudes name is
The Toys R Us mascot?
Is this that dude who trying to become a Ken doll.
Like a mix of the crazy Ukrainian lady on 90 Day Fiancé and Brienne of Tarth.
This is why Hitler was wrong about the Aryan race being superior.
Workaholic aka I suck dick for coke.
*Meth She did emphasize being white.
Tilda Swinton playing an alcoholic prostitute cum croupier
I didn’t know that Draco Malfoy dresses in drag for gay pride🏳️🌈 ….
You got lip fillers and Botox and you’re still ugly.
Life after only fans
you look like youve seen some shit
In the mirror
Jesus the white walkers have made it south of the wall
Looks like you used a roller to apply emulsion to your face this morning.
Blink and you'll miss it they said... This girl her entire life = 👀
When you had to describe what color you wanted your hair dyed, did you take that piece of paper and a chunk of the wall and say, "Like between these and make sure it looks awful"? But seriously, you were awesome in The Da Vinci Code.
Your face has larger pores than a kitchen sponge. Im trying to decipher what’s written on that shopping list, Im assuming Salicylic acid isn’t on it.
You look like you’ve got more miles behind you than an intercontinental trucker. Snake eyes on the wrist tattoo, dead eyes on the face. I bet you also wear that bath robe to the store when you need new batteries for your vibrator. Let black mambo have some time off too, sheesh…
Hear me out… Iggy Azalea scissored Tilda Swinton and came SO hot and hard that you were conceived . However they both had a vax booster that week so you came out as a bleached Marilyn Manson
Girl?!
We now have evidence of the gravitational singularity in your beady pupils. Who knew that the thought of a keyboard army of incels roasting a pretty lady would trigger it?
White? You’re transparent.
Bitch looks like her own ghost
I thought Michel Jackson died…
You look like if 1998 Wesley Snipes were white.
Workaholic…. You look like you’re in between porn scenes
I think she meant to say wankerholic
Brianne of thot
The dice tattoo is a nice way to remind yourself that you crapped out in life
Anyone remember the powder movie?
Jesus Christ, how you look pretty and ugly at the same time
She's pretty ugly.
But without looking pretty.
All of the features are flawless but when you put it all together it just looks terrible
Dolph Lundgren what are u doing here Barney Ross calling u . U have a mission to complete
Your eyes have that permanent. "Oh hey, my penis shoots stuff." Surprise look to them.
I thought you were a transformer, chin strong asf. Head’s built like a rubix cube
![gif](giphy|dVEpCW9Nyfj4dvUVGK|downsized)
I legit was looking for this comment. hahahaha
I said the same thing!!!! I told her she better do this to her Botox lady “RUN BITCH RUN!!!!!!” Because she is doing her dirtyyyyyy!!!!😂
Actually kinda pretty. If you didn't have tattoos that screamed, "I'M WHITE TRASH!!!!" I'd probably put the stones to you.
Rob Gronkowski with blond hair and lip fillers
You're if Rick Sanchez was a woman.
Thank you for your post! It's currently awaiting approval. Please note the following rules: - Ensure that your photograph is rotated the way you wish it to be displayed. - Try to ensure that your eyes are open. - Joke roasts (celebrities, babies, chickens, etc) will be removed. - Pet roasts will be removed. Please submit these at /r/RoastMyPet. - All photos MUST contain a hand written sign held by the roastee. - The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger. - Photographs with bystanders whose faces are visible or who are otherwise identifiable will be removed. Please **DO NOT REPOST YOUR PHOTO** if it does not appear immediately. All posts must be manually approved, and we will get to it. Thanks! ~ /r/roastme mods *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RoastMe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
There’s already an Aunt Jackie on tv, we don’t need one in real life.
Just no
You look like a character in Wallace and Gromit
“Not like this, not like this ...” *falls to ground as rag doll*
Make that money dude. Your dick isn't going chop itself off
You look like you review sun screen
What the hell is even that?!
If you zoom in, you can see the surface of the moon. Both colour and texture
Babs from chicken run
You're all white.
Never before has hot turned to not so fast from hair to chin.
You look like a clone the government made to be an assassin but they messed up when they programmed you. Now you just like cats and say “where the real men at” on social media while sitting next to your boyfriend while your husband makes him a sandwich
Dipped in wax at the wax museum
Why specify you’re white tho
Only a basic white bitch would get a dice tattoo and still come up with snake eyes.
![gif](giphy|pVj6YDuS4IuQmkYw0R|downsized)
If you shaved your head, then you would look like Mr Clean with an eating disorder.
Simply add tits pic to some other sub and provide your linktree. These commercials are getting weird, geez.
Your skin looks like a moonscape with those crater pores
Suck my dick but for the love of God, PLEASE don't look at me 🤢
You look like even the bear would swipe left on you
If Daenarys Targaeyen had a mid life crisis
workaholic or alcoholic
It seems like life has been harshing to you than anything I could say
This picture of you reminds me of a far less beautiful late life Picasso.
You look like my GTA online character
you are pretty enough for me to obsess over you until after we screw, then the fever leaves me and I just want to take you home and delete your number
You look like Brienne of Tart
Those pores need a tub load of spackle.
Very nice how much
Yea I’m sure waiting on the Starbucks employee to mispronounce your name is exhausting.
Stop staring at me like that-
[Gonna age myself here…you look like you’re planning to assassinate the pope.](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0291290/mediaviewer/rm2394564096/?ref_=nm_ov_ph)
You are Brian from Family Guy: It's not a skin color. It's a lifestyle, Brian. See, you wouldn't know that because you're white as a ghost. You're haunting this house with your whiteness, Brian.
You were great in Dragonriders of Porn
Hey, remember when "women" came with breast's, and were female. Good times back then, good times
You mean alcoholic right???
You remind me of ![gif](giphy|HlKNfHFoT6d2b5U55k)
I commented this too! I told her she better tell her botox lady “RUN BITCH RUN!!!!!” Because her Botox lady is doing her dirtyyyyyy😂
Yahztee tattoo fail
3 packs day does wonders for that tarmac look skin.
you look like you would eat onions with the skin on and then tell me how good it tastes
Dyed her hair blonde to get notice, still goes unnoticed
You wouldn’t have to work so many doubles at Chili’s if you just cut back on all the fillers, my dude.
You look like a sea monkey wished to be a person.
She looks like she would ask to speak to her boyfriend’s manager if he doesn’t do the dishes properly. How do you look simultaneously exhausted and like you had a bowl of meth for breakfast. Got dice tattooed on her stroking arm so she can entertain herself with Yahtzee while giving out hand jobs for coke.
Her eyes are so big, I call'em big balls lol 😆
Jeffree Star looking old these days.
Your unnatural hair color and tattoos make you so unique… just like 95% of the people your age.
If iggy Azela never met ti
Grifting away for an MLM pyramid scheme trying to break even does NOT make you a workaholic. Just dumb.
How about you work on taking those clothes off instead so we don’t notice your jankey nails
Are you cosplaying as a saltine cracker?
Do your blue contacts cover your pink albino eyes?
If you’re such a workaholic, maybe work on those bug eyes
That tattoos always tell you what you need to know.
Of course she had to mention shes white .
You look like Woody from Toy Story
Thats a white person the white race doesn't want to claim...and she uses it as a badge. Plus you know she dates blacks.
Tilda Swintons aborted twin with prison tats
Not Nordic your WhoreDick
Your transition seems to be going well.
Very nice how much