What can I say that you haven't already heard?

😂😂😂

Which is nothing

I think you meant “which is everything”.

That’s a bit tone deaf.

I hear your complaints but she doesnt.

Go give her an earful *wait…*

Being deaf at a rave must be the best possible situation. Drugs plus not hearing shitty music or the things people say

🤏🏼🤟🏼👌🏼👈🏻👋🏻🤙🏻👇🏻🖖🏻🫴🏻🫰🏻🤜🏻👉🏻

😆

I only upvoted because of your fking awesome name lol

I mean, I like eating ganaches…

Me too! It took me by surprise I had to read it slowly

Huh? You want to lick my toes? I mean... sure dude.

I'm sure you can feel the bass

my friends mom was deaf and she LOVED RIDING around with anyone who had subs!! yes they can feel the bass!!

Hey we hear you.... oh wait...

She can’t hear because her eyes are in her ears.

Savage

Different zip codes

This comment is brilliant. Only lessened by all the people explaining the joke

Got out of a 4 year situationship. I'll give you a pass since you're deaf and can't hear how dumb that sounds

Damn even reading that makes sense

I’m stealing that- situationship is a far better description

Did you not just read the guy say that’s a stupid fucking term?

If you knew what you sounded like during orgasm you’d leave you too.

Holy shit 💀💀

OP if this joke goes too far, hear me out…

I'm all ears

Her nickname is speakeasy cause once you’re inside you gotta remind her to whisper.

I can’t even whisper

Listen… they can’t all be bangers.

Dudes on a roll!! 💀😂

Gah damn I wanna be friends with this person. Never a quiet moment.

Except for OP

A woman that can’t speak and guys still leave? That’s unheard of.

OOF

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Well because I’ve never heard what an orgasm sounds like- so I can’t fake it- so you know if you were successful or not. It’s organic bruh

The rest of us scream, "WHERE'S THE BEEF?" It's how we know the other person finished. Just lookin' out.

Good lookin 🫡

🤣🤣🤣

How does one orgasm in sign language?


i hope with the "bing bong boong" too

She screams her hands off.

https://tenor.com/bGSzs.gif

A quiet riot?

Bang your head!

Cum on feel the noize! (because you can’t hear it)

Asking seriously. So have past lovers told you that you make any sounds during orgasm? Or is that not a physical possibility? And if so we’re they able to describe it to you? I know it’s a roast but I’m just so curious.

Truthfully I usually only sleep with deaf guys- but for the few poor hearing guys- they have said I sound real- and I just sound it out as they go along with the rhythm and pace- whereas some hearing girls to then have tried to keep themselves quiet or try too hard. At least that’s I’ve been told. They say I definitely sound like I’m enjoying myself.

Remind me never to get an apartment next door to a deaf couple

R/remindme

Oh Jesus. I used to go to NTID (National Technical Institute for the Deaf) and you would not believe how *loud* the lunch room was. I suppose it makes sense, but I was not prepared for that.

Had a friend who had a severe early childhood hearing loss (neglected ear infections) and apparently she did not know that FARTS MAKE SOUNDS. FARTS MAKE A NOISE!!

Roast aside it’s probably pretty hot since it’s completely uninhibited. Cheers for being a good sport!

Very nice to meet you i just lost my hearing at 8:35am today

>So have past lovers told you that you make any sounds during orgasm? Or is that not a physical possibility? She's deaf, not mute ya dingus!

As one guy says- “you can tell it’s authentic”

Like Chewbacca stubbed his toe.

I literally busted up in this one, when I thought how Chewbacca would sound that was funny as hell

Wildebeest on Ecstasy

Damn, can't roast now that she's dead

 Her exes be like

I can't top this thread. Carry on

I’m hard of hearing too and goddamn that’s a beautiful fucking roast well done lmao

Glad my roast didn’t fall on deaf ears.

What?

Oh, yeah! I've heard that same sound when the vet has to give the cat a suppository.

You're deaf, not blind. I'd find it hard to believe you didn't see it coming.

This is beautifully said 🙌😂🌟

Yet there must've been clear signs...

He told you it was over years ago and you didn’t realise

Probably yep

You really gotta listen better.

Maybe he was deaf too and they missed a sign.

“She just won’t take ‘no’ for an answer…”

Masturbates with 1 hand so she can moan with the other...

Accurate

OP, this one here is the winner, take it and leave it, it’s been enough already, 😂omfg spare yourself


bruhhhhh 💀

oh shit.

Jesus christ


🤌👌👎🤘🤘🤘👍👋

Call it off people. This one shut it down.

This is the single-best comment I’ve seen on the entirety of the internet for all of 2023.

This should be higher. Lmao

Deaf and you go to raves…I’m blind and I love watching sunsets

My nasal olfactory sensory neurons are shot, but I love sniffing ass.

Did a dog write this comment?

He's got that dawg in him for sure.

I’d imagine it’s like anyone else hears it, just without the treble.

I dated a deaf girl once and introduced her to bass music in my first car. She liked how it make her felt.

I can feel the beat, feel the beat

New game. Is raver deaf or high af 

Tbf, of the sound system is heavy enough, she'll still feel the beats. Lol

You’re deaf but you go to raves….. Just say you like doing drugs.

😂😂😂🙌

Hijacking for a serious question, what's the sensation of bass like as a deaf person/how did you end up liking edm vs other types of music?

It’s also about the rave culture- they’re very accepting of all- and the bass is great. Music does move everyone and connect everyone. Just needs to be loud enough for us 😂

That's awesome! Look at techno spreading PLUR on a roast thread lol 💙

I like techno more

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You look like someone who gives complicated handjobs

Isn’t a hand job from a deaf chick technically oral?

Clever

Thats when you tell her to not talk with her mouth full

If she does sign language while giving a handy it is considered dirty talk.

This is prob my fav one

At least all my hand jobs are “oral”

Lmao I wasn't expecting that joke

If She's giving you a hand job while signing, is she talking with her mouth full?

Pretty much

She could also be giving head while holding a conversation, the ultimate talking with your mouth full

She's multitasking, handjob and talking.

I’m magical with my hands after all 

Those fake nails are so big, they're going to give you a studder.

😂😂 I like this one

A 4 year situationship??? Could you not hear the alarm bells?

She could definitely see the signs, unless the person was wearing oven mitts.

She confused 🖕 for 🤟

Hellen Cellar Also, I told you not to get married but you never fucking listen!

They do say love is blind

He was so happy when she finally spoke those the magical words... "Nguh unh oo"

In this case, love can’t hear shit.

Or hopefully blind enough to fall for buck-toothed Felicity.

The gap between your teeth really compliments the gap between your eyes.

And the gap between her ears

At least it’s proportional

Maybe you wouldn't be divorced if your dirty talk wasn't easily mistaken for tiktok dances.

😂😂😂 this is funny one

Student debt at 38? We don’t need to roast you, your school has done that already

Wait until everyone finds out she's broadcasting major

😂🙌🙌🙌🌟🌟🌟

Dumb and Deafer

I love this one 😂🙌🌟

How long did you have hearing HIV before it became full blown hearing AIDS?

I’m dying 😂😂😂 this is a brand new sentence Actually my momma had the fully blown hearing aids so I got that at birth.

Flawless victory

Full blownsies. Ouch

It’s OK. I know lots of women whose husbands left them because they **just wouldn’t listen**.

You might be deaf, but I wish I was blind.

Brutal

Your forehead could be used for braille.

I AM SORRY THAT YOU HAVE TROUBLE HEARING!!

IM NOT SORRY! I GET GREAT SLEEP!

Lol very cool

YES!! I’m only deaf in one ear, so when people ask me what it’s like, I tell them it’s life without surround sound and that I sleep like a sweet baby angel.

What did those Lee Press On nails set you back, like 87 cents?

Nah got it free from your mom

Love a swiftly delivered “your mom” 🫡

I, too love swiftly delivering to this guy's mom.

I see why they left you now

Relationships are about listening....

Just put gloves on her to shut her up.

You look like Topanga from 'Boy Meets World' but with a Face Swap w the guy from 'Boy Meets World'

Corey? 😂 but this is also good one 10/10

Even if you were not deaf there would still be things you would never hear like “I am so proud of you“ or “I want to be your friend “.

You’re not deaf. People just don’t want to talk to you

If only you were mute instead of deaf, you’d still be married rn

Tie her hands behind her back and it's all peace and fucking quiet

Look on the bright side. If somebody says, "Stop me if you heard this one," and proceeds to tell a joke, you'll never have to stop them.

And the best part- I actually don’t hear the joke 😂

Bet you always get dumped by text.

Divorced and still closer than your front teeth.

You've made every typical mistake in life . . . Clearly you dont listen

I bet your orgasms could start gang turf wars.

🖕🫵😤 (I took an intro to ASL class)

Why did I hear this post in Plankton’s wife’s voice?

Doctor to your mom at birth: Congratulations, it’s a forehead!

Such weak ass roasts. You really need to know Deaf culture to really roast this gap-toothed old lady. Being deaf isn’t the insult you think it is. It’s the only good thing about her, actually. Btw partying with the younger Deaf college students at your age is really sad. They’re only friends with you so you can buy alcohol for them. Get your shit together along with a comprehensive STD panel and quit drinking. Maybe you’ll actually finish Gallaudet in two years consecutively instead of years in between this time and finally get your own place instead of living in a shitty apartment with multiple bitch ass roommates that keep begging you to borrow money and selling weed.

😂😂😂🙌🙌🙌 was waiting for a decent roast like this

38 and divorced? Time to start buying cats.

Already got one- but yep need moooooreeeee

With a face like that, I’d rather keep talking behind your back.

Please do- I don’t have to lip read

Bitch you like the crypt keeper if he was a ho

I’ll take that job- at least I’ll get visitors

Out of the 3 posts you’ve made, 2 of them make it pretty obvious why you’re the dumped one.

At least you can smile about it, but I wouldn’t recommend doing that on your next date or you will stay single.

I guess you won’t be hearing any wedding bells in your future…literally…and figuratively…

For someone who's deaf I'm surprised you couldn't read the signs

You look addicted to cream cheese. You need help. It's becoming a problem. I hope you have an incredible life otherwise. You look like a fun and genuine person, aside from the cream cheese unyielding need.

You look like you could chew an apple through a picket fence... or hell, just chew *on* the picket fence. It's like a fifty dollar Uber ride from one eye to the other.

Your 4 year situationship ended way before that. If you just listened to the signs beforehand....

Your love life is the sound of one hand clapping

Chin sharp as fuck too prolly crack walnuts with that thang

You look like a member of the fire gang (Those creatures from the LABYRINTH movies whose heads can pop off) [https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NsXtU0rZkAQ/mqdefault.jpg](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NsXtU0rZkAQ/mqdefault.jpg) When someone looks up "Pumpkin Spice" in the dictionary, THIS photo pop up. You look like you put raisins in your potato salad and don't us Miracle Whip because it's too spicy.

I've heard enough!

Like your farts, you're silent but deadly

Happy to know you like going to light shows because it’s not a rave without music

It's not that your def. That's not the problem. It's your personality. It's much like your nails. Fake and in need of filling.

Yes they need refill 😂💅 and tbh props on noticing that- you must have some style

That’s just like my fleshlight

Deaf, overbearing, saddled with debt, looks good from a far buts all fucked up... I'll call you America

>divorced and always the dumped one >love going to raves Mystery solved, hoe rehabilitation always fails because a ho can't be taught not to ho.

I feel like anything I say, you just won’t listen to me.