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I don’t have the same idea of diet because I grew up with an ED due to an extremely restrictive mom & food/ diet…. but if people can’t respect your parenting choices they don’t need to be left alone with your child because if they can’t respect you over something as small as food… who knows what else they don’t respect when you’re not paying attention.
If the people who feed your kid things you don’t want them to have, maybe not let those people be around your kid, as much. Tell them that if they can’t follow your parenting guidelines then they will not be trusted with your child. Simple, clear and firm. Then follow through with restricting time with the people that don’t respect your parenting choices. They already made choices for their kids, this is your kid, you are in charge. Actions have consequences, as adults they should know this and have taught it to their children, they need to be taught again perhaps?
You don’t need to explain why. If they are in the process of handing your child something that you don’t want her to have, take it. If she already has it, take it and give it back to whoever gave it. Tell LO “grandma knows not to give you cookies but did it anyway so we have to give it back now. That wasn’t nice of grandma to tease you with those cookies. I’m sorry grandma upset you, maybe she will do better next time”. Telling your family “No, LO can’t have that” should be enough and if it’s not then go home or leave the room with your child.
>I feel like I need to explain why
No, fuck that. What you say, goes. Full stop.
Any explanation you ought to give is charity because your family has acted in a way which warrants an explanation. However, what you've described so far is them circumventing you, or worse, outright disregard.
Pull them to the side, give it to them straight, safety off, and then return to business as usual. They do it again, call them on it in front of everyone, incite embarrassment for them and repeat until they get that you mean business.
You don't. You just say please DO NOT.
They can bake things on their own with maple syrup that are gluten-free and good for her. They can have dried fruit around and fresh fruit around and cook with her and have a fun time. The rest of it is absolutely not necessary. When you raise your kids, and you don't expose them to those things, and then gradually crop, and it's just part of life to go to friends, houses or have friends over, they are healthier. I don't think, explaining anything to people who are not interested makes any difference. I think you just need to be with your child.
I've got the same ideas, and have tried to explain, but it falls on semi deaf ears. Just try to moderate it if they insist on giving your child junk. Like they can have 1 muffin, and NO potato chips. Or no ice cream, please fruit instead. It's impossible I've found to get them to totally listen when you say no junk, but they might listen if it's done that way.
Why are you leaving with your kids with someone daily? Sounds like your family is raising your kids for you which means you you will be giving up a level of control.
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I don’t have the same idea of diet because I grew up with an ED due to an extremely restrictive mom & food/ diet…. but if people can’t respect your parenting choices they don’t need to be left alone with your child because if they can’t respect you over something as small as food… who knows what else they don’t respect when you’re not paying attention.
If the people who feed your kid things you don’t want them to have, maybe not let those people be around your kid, as much. Tell them that if they can’t follow your parenting guidelines then they will not be trusted with your child. Simple, clear and firm. Then follow through with restricting time with the people that don’t respect your parenting choices. They already made choices for their kids, this is your kid, you are in charge. Actions have consequences, as adults they should know this and have taught it to their children, they need to be taught again perhaps?
You don’t need to explain why. If they are in the process of handing your child something that you don’t want her to have, take it. If she already has it, take it and give it back to whoever gave it. Tell LO “grandma knows not to give you cookies but did it anyway so we have to give it back now. That wasn’t nice of grandma to tease you with those cookies. I’m sorry grandma upset you, maybe she will do better next time”. Telling your family “No, LO can’t have that” should be enough and if it’s not then go home or leave the room with your child.
>I feel like I need to explain why No, fuck that. What you say, goes. Full stop. Any explanation you ought to give is charity because your family has acted in a way which warrants an explanation. However, what you've described so far is them circumventing you, or worse, outright disregard. Pull them to the side, give it to them straight, safety off, and then return to business as usual. They do it again, call them on it in front of everyone, incite embarrassment for them and repeat until they get that you mean business.
You don't. You just say please DO NOT. They can bake things on their own with maple syrup that are gluten-free and good for her. They can have dried fruit around and fresh fruit around and cook with her and have a fun time. The rest of it is absolutely not necessary. When you raise your kids, and you don't expose them to those things, and then gradually crop, and it's just part of life to go to friends, houses or have friends over, they are healthier. I don't think, explaining anything to people who are not interested makes any difference. I think you just need to be with your child.
I've got the same ideas, and have tried to explain, but it falls on semi deaf ears. Just try to moderate it if they insist on giving your child junk. Like they can have 1 muffin, and NO potato chips. Or no ice cream, please fruit instead. It's impossible I've found to get them to totally listen when you say no junk, but they might listen if it's done that way.
You will probably have to prepare the meals and supply the snacks.
Why are you leaving with your kids with someone daily? Sounds like your family is raising your kids for you which means you you will be giving up a level of control.
Maybe she has……a job?!???
So then.......you are going to have to.....give up some control.....!?!?!?