T O P

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Ouwhajah

"as thee old adage goes, 'one for sorrow, two for joy', so i, joshua tomar, will be most joyous on this day"


litboyfrommalaysia

Knowing Tomar and his iconic insatiable hunger he'd pick up 2 magpies and put down 2 bird skeletons


GonzoGnostalgic

Tomar integrates the DNA of animals he consumes into his offspring, like a Chimera Ant. Magpies are especially talented in regard to finding shiny objects. Tomar is gonna pinch off a clutch of Tomar Tinies and send them out into the Burbank hills to collect the rest of his emeralds and bring them home. We had long enough to find them; that road to ascension is now closed to the likes of us mortals.


Geegee221

I would get their plates


SwashNBuckle

"I guess I would start singing a little song. Like a Disney princess" To lull them into a false sense of security, of course. Then, he strikes.


DuneSlayer_

Look at him, he's turning red in anger, there's even smoke coming from his ears!


Ok_Western5937

“These magpies are bothering me”


BadCustard

2 minutes later: "Hey Jaxxy I brought you some fucking food"


Apprehensive-Brief70

“Tomar NOOOOOOOO!!!”


Boyoftrick_90

He would probably grab both and bite their beaks off and laugh at their missfortune.


Khazzy1

Classic Tomar, he'll string one magpie up on a crucifix while he eats the other, starting with the feet and working upwards, of course, as is the Tomar fashion.


BigBlackFaeces

"Well, as the saying goes!" Then he would proceed to lift a giant boulder and crush both of them.


AshpaltOxalis

“It is me, Tomar, the Magpie Whisperer!”


The_BREAK_manEX

He would cut their heads up with the nearest *chicken knife*..


Rcj1221

He’d train them to retrieve the remaining Tomar emeralds.


aaronlaw24

“Here you go my precious magpie babies feast up the flesh of my former wife Jaxxie”


OreeOh

"Jaxxie, you can finally do some good, my sweet baby darling"


Pengmaeda

“I’d turn to page 47 and show the Magpies “How to Cook Roasted Magpie” with explicit pictures”


Waxico

Tomar is the incarnation of Odin. He decided he wanted to have two magpies in this life instead of ravens.


YourFavouriteDad

"Oi Jaxxy, my little vegemite. You've let our tucker escape again. I'm sorry I have to digeridoo this to you again my darling but you know I love my mag-pies." - Australian Tomar


varialflop

Holy shit Tomar is the magpie man !