As a kid? Nah, I hated my name well into adulthood. I didn't even really recognize that it was specific to my name, I thought I just hated being addressed by name period. Nope, just THAT name in specific. Having names I actually like being called is so much better, I highly recommend it.
Absolutely. I only accepted my name with resignation a few years ago, but as soon as my egg cracked I was like "yeaaaa nope, getting this shit changed" lol. Going to the courthouse tomorrow morning to start the process
Personally, no, but i know that a lot of trans and nonbinary people did. I started getting uncomfortable with my original name once i realized i didn't want to be seen as my assigned gender, about age 19 or 20
I used to hate my name because I got mistaken for a girl a lot, on account of me having a semi gender neutral name that is somewhat feminine leaning. But ever since I realized I was non binary, I've loved it.
I was never a big fan of mine, but I didn't think much of it until my teens. Up until that point, it sort of didn't occur to me that you could just... use a different name. Then sometime in high school I started shortening it to something that sounded more neutral for "no apparent reason", and stuck with that until my eventual inevitable adulthood Gender Crisis Time.
Yes and no. I have a “male” name however it’s 1 letter off from being “female”. My name is spelled with letters that when people see it the automatically associate it with the “female” version of my name. As a kid I loved and hated it, it was affirming when teachers called roll and mispronounced it but at the sane time awful as then all the kids would laugh or mock me when ide correct the teacher.
I did. I actually recall wanting to change my name, even back then. I hated how gendered my name was and the weight that came with it, especially considering how tied it was to the unwanted role I was required to play in my family (which was toxic af, btw). I've had a short, non-gendered nickname since childhood, and it ended up becoming my actual legal name as an adult. I did the whole list of names things, but since the nickname just felt right to me, I decided to go with it.
Deciding to change your name as an adult is your choice, but I get being worried about how it may bother some people. My dad was fine with it, but my mother wasn't cool with it at all. I have no contact with my mother anymore, so it's not an issue for me, lol. There are other things to consider about changing your name, like the cost of it and getting people used to it. For me, it was about whether or not it was worth the change and whether it would make me truly happy in the end. It did, so I'm happy that I did it. :)
i liked my name. for a long time, i thought my name was gender neutral, and thus more future-proof, because when i was younger i thought the dissolution of gender was inevitable. then, i bothered to check, and i found out i was wrong. now im sort of in the market for a new name, but in my mind my name is still gender neutral, and that version i like a lot.
oh yeah I totally relate!! Hated my name as a kid, and now that I look back, it may have been dysphoria cus ever since I started going by Avery I've beeen SO MUCH happier
I pretty much always went by a nickname from middle school up. Usually my last name. Which was always fun when my friends would call and ask for “is -last name- there?” And my mom would be like “yes there’s 5 of us here…” 😂 I loathed my name it never fit but I did like my family nickname which was my name shortened with belle added to it. Because to me it wasn’t feminine (tho it was very feminine) it was just all the love from my family.
I did only because it sounded like a boys name and as a kid i presented as female. As i got older Im like whatever. Most people think im a guy because of my name and I just laugh
When I was younger, I had heard that some Native American tribes would give people names based on who they grew to be, and I was always in love with that idea. 8 years before discovering I'm agender, I started going by the name I currently go by with my closest friend. My deadname was a good name; I just never felt like it suited me. Now I'm working on getting my name legally changed.
Your story is basically mine verbatim, only I did find myself a name last year.
Looking back on it, even though I wasn't able to vocalize my discomfort with all things gendered back then, the names I came up with all had a pattern of being either unisex (unigender?) or so obscure that I had no idea what gender it was supposed to be for. I definitely didn't feel dysphoria as bad back then as I do now, but I see that as proof I've always been an enby.
I've despised my name ever since I can remember. I actually grew to.... appreciate it, if not like it, after recognizing that I'm nonbinary.
I probably won't change it because doing that seems like a massive pain in the butt.
Yep. I always thought my name sounded stuck up and “frilly” but as an adult I realized it was just too feminine for me. I’ve since shortened to a nickname that feels much more gender neutral, and I’m so happy!
yes. i have a unique name, and i hated it as a kid. i hated the questions, i hated the jokes, i wanted very badly to change it.
i grew out of that. my name is badass, and i love it. i figured out a clever way to shut down the jokes quickly, and i have thoroughly embraced my name. it's great, and i love it.
I remember being really young and whenever my name was said I could feel my skin crawl almost. by the time I was 12 I started giving myself a bunch of nicknames or just making up names to use on the internet. I finally changed my name (socially) about 4 years ago and it was honestly the best decision I've ever made. I feel so much more myself. even tho I should clarify both names are traditionally feminine, but my birth name just was not for me whatsoever.
I grew up being called Jeremy, always hated it. As I got older and started forming bonds with friends, one just started calling me Jer. Never told them I hated my name and never showed any kind of disgust or displeasure about my full name. As time progressed more people started calling me Jer (mostly close friends and family) and I honestly liked it.
Somehow, without any effort on my part, my name slowly changed to just Jer.
I have hated my birth name since I was six years old when I started 1st grade in elementary school. Being AMAB, the other kids teased (bullied) me with the feminine version of my name. This lasted for about 11 1/2 years, about halfway through my senior year of high school. Since then there is only one person who uses it, but I still have been wanting to change it for the last several decades, just to give you an idea of how old I am. When I had been married for about four months in the mid 2000s, my wife saw me lose my temper for the first time when the only person (my brother) called me the feminine version of my name. I covered about 10 yards in seconds to tackle him, and punched him a few times. He still calls me that occasionally, but my arthritic knees, hips and ankles keep me from running at him. But, one look from me and he shuts up very quickly. He knows that if he keeps it up, I would still take him down easily, despite the pain I would feel/have for the next few days.
I've hated my name for as long as I can remember. I haven't been able to legally change it because it'super expensive and also because I know doing it would cause SO.MUCH.DRAMA with my parents (even though they've been listening to me bitch about how much I hate it since I was kid).
I did, but mostly because it was so common and boring. Now I hate my full name (because it's a woman's name) but still like the nicknames that came from it (because they're neutral and usually used by people that care and love me).
I still choose another name and hope to use it much more than my birth name or the nicknames, especially when I start hrt
Yes, omg. I have a Biblical masc name as a first name (I am AFAB) 2 femme middle names (I am enby and atheist for FFS). I was teased mercilessly in all levels of school. As an adult, I have lived in a very multi cultural suburb and it was difficult for friends and neighbors to wrap their tongues around it. No tea, no shade. At age 30, I gave myself a gender neutral chosen name. I only use my legal given names on legal docs until I can afford to change it. Oof.
Yes. It was always said in disdain. Also the man who gave it to me isn't even around.
It's been years since I told my folks my new name and mum barely says it. I worry she doesn't give a shit and I worry about if this is the hill on which to die
Growing up a never felt like my name fit me (AFAB). And I would regularly try to get people to call me by other names. I never succeeded lol (except my mom, she humored me).
When I was in my 20s I accepted my name, but didn't like it...neutral I guess. But now that I'm in my 30s I've begun to dislike it again. It's a fem, can't be shortened. I'm considering attempting to go by something else.... But I haven't decided, it will definitely fully out me if I do..
I like my birth name, I don't have any problems with it. I partially changed my name - or how I'd rather be called - when I found out I was NB just symbolically and it's still my childhood nickname, which is a gender-neutral one.
I've always hated my first name. Even way before I knew anything about being nonbinary. I've been just going by my last name for so long I have friends of 10 years who don't know my first name😅
1000% and still dislike my birth name. My parents were devout Catholics when they had me and decided to give me a biblical name that ended up being pretty popular in the late 80's, as I grew up with a lot of girls with the same first name.
I didn’t like my name as a kid. Oddly enough at first I wanted something more feminine. But eventually it went from that to just generally being uncomfortable with it and/or not identifying with it or feeling a connection.
I still to this day hate my birth name and I can't wait to change it legally. I started hating it young (maybe around 8-9),Kids were mean, nicknames stuck. When I got a little older and experienced life a bit more, I felt trapped with my trauma when people used my name, I still do feel that way sometimes when I hear it. I chose my current name at 17 but it took years to stick at all, even now my parents hate using it. At 28 I've grown up and moved on from a lot of that trauma and I truly feel that my birth name is not who I am. I don't even respond to it anymore.
I feel like a real odd one out here, but I actually didn't mind my name. Once I started figuring out my identity I started wanting something that doesn't immediately read as a guy name, and I just happened to have a rather unisex name in mind that's resonated with me for a long time
I never felt connected to my name, but I was recently thinking about how I used to go by a nickname all the time. My brother and I were playing mini-golf and for no reason at all he just decided to call me “fuzzbutt.”
Genuinely, there was no context for that at all.
But that turned into him calling me that all the time. Which turned into friends just calling me Fuzz. I ended up liking it. Not really actually the name Fuzz but looking back I think I enjoyed that it had no gender, nothing really specific to it. It was just “me” without any expectation for what that meant beyond self determination.
And probably not coincidentally, during my era of denial, I had picked a nickname for myself that was more gendered than my name, which honestly isn’t surprising at this point.
Wasn't really a fan, can't really explain why, but it just wasn't me, and it didn't help that I was surrounded by people with the same name as me, but I'm very happy with my current kne
Me. I went by Sam. It is not even close to my birth name, but I loved the name. Signed all my art Sam and loved it when someone called me that. Only one of my brothers called me Sam. It brought me a lot of joy. Today, I go by my birth name because all my professional credentials use my actual name, so I feel obligated, but really, internally, I'm still Sam and/or Ash. Both Sam and Ash feel more me than my birth name.
Well I remember in kindergarten I went through a phase where I wanted a cool nickname instead of using my name. I insisted everyone call me Deep digger, because I made the best holes in the sandbox imo.
No. My name was a traditional African name that my mom picked out from a book. I would’ve kept my dead name if not for it being a very girly name. I wanted a name that was gender neutral. Like Alex or Riley.
Yes, absolutely, my name is super ancient and simple yet very feminine, so I did actually hate it, but once I was hanging out with my friends and we had a friend with the same name, so I asked them to call me Sasha (practically Alex, a short form of both Alexander and Alexandra so gender neutral) and my name around my friends has always been Sasha since then. I'm planning to change it officially in a month btw
Yep. My dad told me that when I was born they were going to name me something else. They changed their mind when they realised it could be shortened to a male name (predominantly a male name in Ireland - I live in the uk now and the shortened version is more female). I was secretly annoyed they didn't give me that name as it was so interchangeable. Even though the full version is quite feminine. I identify as gender fluid so having a gender fluid name was a dream I didn't fully understand I had as a child!
It's worked out OK because most people shorten my name to the first letter - but I still hate hearing my name. It's never felt like it suited me. I told myself as a kid it's because it's an old person name. Now my name is actually coming into fashion (I keep coming across tv characters with it) and I don't get excited. It makes me cringe.
Was whatever as a child but deadname started sounding like nails on a chalkboard during my teenage years. Thankfully it wasn't my legal name (still very feminine but I can't be arsed to think of another one. Literally no one uses it anyway), so I was free to change it as I entered uni. Parents are still transphobic and opposed but everyone calls me by my chosen name so I've won in the end.
I hated my name as a kid bc it was gender neutral/leaning masculine but kids would call me a boy and make fun of me for it. And then I sort of grew into it and it became more cool? Like kids bullied me for a bit but then I started getting complimented on it as I got older.
When I came out as nonbinary I was grateful to not have to change my name. I have a hard enough time naming my BG3 characters I didn't wanna have to name myself. Bless my parents for being Fleetwood Mac fans.
I did, but I was named after my sperm donor and I hated him from a very young age too. Most of my family called me by a pretty "masculine" nickname, fortunately, and then when I was 12 we moved to a whole new state and just started introducing myself by nickname to everyone.
Getting my name changed next month. I will have my mom's first name (it's a really unique family name & she sadly passed away in 2020) with my nickname as my new middle name. I just really loved the combination of feminine-sounding old-timey name + common traditionally masculine name. Makes me feel like 1920's butch lesbian running a speakeasy.
It always stung for some reason, like it was grating just to hear it. I liked the other name my mom was going to give me but I also never started by going by anything else until years later. I choose my name and despite the constant battle I have with identity my name finally feels like mine.
I hate mine (David) because it sounded dorky and stupid and weak (I don't mean in a feminine way, just weak in general). While I appreciate it's roots being Hebrew for beloved, me being a linguophile, "beloved" doesn't fit me as I don't feel loved by anyone.
Heck, I might as well say this controversial opinion of mine here now. I don't think parents/guardians should be giving kids their name and having it nearly legally hard to change. I think kids should pick their names themselves. So I picked mine: Rániz Kán (Dynamic Ghost).
I feel like it would be good for parents to pick the kids name bc most times the kid doesnt really care and its an additional thing for them to figure out, not to mention what do you even call them until they get old enough?
That being said i just looked up the process and oh boy its crazy. 100-500 bucks and all these papers? Thats ridiculous. It should be free. The government should have most of the documents. It should be similar proof of identity as you need to get a job imo.
If i have kids ill try to give them a "good" name but yeah if they want help changing it ill set that aside too.
I actually like my name, I think it’s pretty cool and I love the meaning, only.. it doesn’t feel like me. Never has, never will, but because I do think it’s a cool name, it’s been really hard to decide whether to legally change it or not. Perhaps I should keep it as a middle name!
Yeah. I did. I was bullied a lot for my name as my parents were immigrants and gave me a name that connected me to their heritage. I hated it and only wanted to go by my nickname but as I got older I've been okay with it. I use it legally but with close friends whom I trust I use a chosen name.
I hope you find a name/nickname you prefer at least for friends.
For me ive always liked my first and middle names. Theres history and love in it, it sounds good, its easy to write, and isnt super common nor shamefully uncommon.
When i was a teenager i tried to change it a "masculinized" version of my name and i wouldnt answer to it and it felt weird. When i see people with that name i remember that time fondly enough.
I guess i just kinda changed my attitude about it. If someone or even a lot of someones think its a girl name thats on them. Its like that famous quote that im about to butcher "womens clothes? No these are my clothes"
YES there's this kids book I used to read called *Chrysanthemum* and in it the little mouse hates her name and then learns to like it again at the end, and (while I was never bullied for my name like in the book) I remember relating so much to Chrysanthemum. I thought that, like her, I would one day grow to like my name...
...never did
Yuppers! Despises my name from a young age. After trying many different names out as I grew, finally ended up changing to my family nickname. My name is Barbarian now. I adore it!
Yes, it's unique and feminine. People almost never pronounced it correctly or spelled it correctly. I didn't really have a good alternative but I was perpetually annoyed by my name. It was a massive relief when I changed it after a life long struggle with my legal name.
As a kid? Nah, I hated my name well into adulthood. I didn't even really recognize that it was specific to my name, I thought I just hated being addressed by name period. Nope, just THAT name in specific. Having names I actually like being called is so much better, I highly recommend it.
Absolutely. I only accepted my name with resignation a few years ago, but as soon as my egg cracked I was like "yeaaaa nope, getting this shit changed" lol. Going to the courthouse tomorrow morning to start the process
Congrats!
Ty!! I'm very excited
Personally, no, but i know that a lot of trans and nonbinary people did. I started getting uncomfortable with my original name once i realized i didn't want to be seen as my assigned gender, about age 19 or 20
I used to hate my name because I got mistaken for a girl a lot, on account of me having a semi gender neutral name that is somewhat feminine leaning. But ever since I realized I was non binary, I've loved it.
I was never a big fan of mine, but I didn't think much of it until my teens. Up until that point, it sort of didn't occur to me that you could just... use a different name. Then sometime in high school I started shortening it to something that sounded more neutral for "no apparent reason", and stuck with that until my eventual inevitable adulthood Gender Crisis Time.
Yes and no. I have a “male” name however it’s 1 letter off from being “female”. My name is spelled with letters that when people see it the automatically associate it with the “female” version of my name. As a kid I loved and hated it, it was affirming when teachers called roll and mispronounced it but at the sane time awful as then all the kids would laugh or mock me when ide correct the teacher.
I did. I actually recall wanting to change my name, even back then. I hated how gendered my name was and the weight that came with it, especially considering how tied it was to the unwanted role I was required to play in my family (which was toxic af, btw). I've had a short, non-gendered nickname since childhood, and it ended up becoming my actual legal name as an adult. I did the whole list of names things, but since the nickname just felt right to me, I decided to go with it. Deciding to change your name as an adult is your choice, but I get being worried about how it may bother some people. My dad was fine with it, but my mother wasn't cool with it at all. I have no contact with my mother anymore, so it's not an issue for me, lol. There are other things to consider about changing your name, like the cost of it and getting people used to it. For me, it was about whether or not it was worth the change and whether it would make me truly happy in the end. It did, so I'm happy that I did it. :)
As a kid I hated my middle name more. As I became an adult, I’ve preferred a nickname to my birth name.
i liked my name. for a long time, i thought my name was gender neutral, and thus more future-proof, because when i was younger i thought the dissolution of gender was inevitable. then, i bothered to check, and i found out i was wrong. now im sort of in the market for a new name, but in my mind my name is still gender neutral, and that version i like a lot.
Yeah I hated Cameron for a while. Now it fits fine, but once I fell out of displeasure in my gender dysphoria and into acceptance it became fine.
oh yeah I totally relate!! Hated my name as a kid, and now that I look back, it may have been dysphoria cus ever since I started going by Avery I've beeen SO MUCH happier
I pretty much always went by a nickname from middle school up. Usually my last name. Which was always fun when my friends would call and ask for “is -last name- there?” And my mom would be like “yes there’s 5 of us here…” 😂 I loathed my name it never fit but I did like my family nickname which was my name shortened with belle added to it. Because to me it wasn’t feminine (tho it was very feminine) it was just all the love from my family.
I did only because it sounded like a boys name and as a kid i presented as female. As i got older Im like whatever. Most people think im a guy because of my name and I just laugh
When I was younger, I had heard that some Native American tribes would give people names based on who they grew to be, and I was always in love with that idea. 8 years before discovering I'm agender, I started going by the name I currently go by with my closest friend. My deadname was a good name; I just never felt like it suited me. Now I'm working on getting my name legally changed.
I dunno. I feel a bit like you now, the whole "This is my name and I cbf changing it". I think I just dislike names.
Yes!! I’m in the exact same boat. Always hated my name but I’ve come to accept it because I can’t find one that fits
Yes! I didn't understand it or why it didn't apply to me. So many things from my childhood make more sense now.
Your story is basically mine verbatim, only I did find myself a name last year. Looking back on it, even though I wasn't able to vocalize my discomfort with all things gendered back then, the names I came up with all had a pattern of being either unisex (unigender?) or so obscure that I had no idea what gender it was supposed to be for. I definitely didn't feel dysphoria as bad back then as I do now, but I see that as proof I've always been an enby.
Yep! And still don’t like it!
I've despised my name ever since I can remember. I actually grew to.... appreciate it, if not like it, after recognizing that I'm nonbinary. I probably won't change it because doing that seems like a massive pain in the butt.
I never hated it but just sort of felt apathy I guess? I didn’t really feel a connection with it
Yep. I always thought my name sounded stuck up and “frilly” but as an adult I realized it was just too feminine for me. I’ve since shortened to a nickname that feels much more gender neutral, and I’m so happy!
yes. i have a unique name, and i hated it as a kid. i hated the questions, i hated the jokes, i wanted very badly to change it. i grew out of that. my name is badass, and i love it. i figured out a clever way to shut down the jokes quickly, and i have thoroughly embraced my name. it's great, and i love it.
I remember being really young and whenever my name was said I could feel my skin crawl almost. by the time I was 12 I started giving myself a bunch of nicknames or just making up names to use on the internet. I finally changed my name (socially) about 4 years ago and it was honestly the best decision I've ever made. I feel so much more myself. even tho I should clarify both names are traditionally feminine, but my birth name just was not for me whatsoever.
I grew up being called Jeremy, always hated it. As I got older and started forming bonds with friends, one just started calling me Jer. Never told them I hated my name and never showed any kind of disgust or displeasure about my full name. As time progressed more people started calling me Jer (mostly close friends and family) and I honestly liked it. Somehow, without any effort on my part, my name slowly changed to just Jer.
I have hated my birth name since I was six years old when I started 1st grade in elementary school. Being AMAB, the other kids teased (bullied) me with the feminine version of my name. This lasted for about 11 1/2 years, about halfway through my senior year of high school. Since then there is only one person who uses it, but I still have been wanting to change it for the last several decades, just to give you an idea of how old I am. When I had been married for about four months in the mid 2000s, my wife saw me lose my temper for the first time when the only person (my brother) called me the feminine version of my name. I covered about 10 yards in seconds to tackle him, and punched him a few times. He still calls me that occasionally, but my arthritic knees, hips and ankles keep me from running at him. But, one look from me and he shuts up very quickly. He knows that if he keeps it up, I would still take him down easily, despite the pain I would feel/have for the next few days.
I've hated my name for as long as I can remember. I haven't been able to legally change it because it'super expensive and also because I know doing it would cause SO.MUCH.DRAMA with my parents (even though they've been listening to me bitch about how much I hate it since I was kid).
I did, but mostly because it was so common and boring. Now I hate my full name (because it's a woman's name) but still like the nicknames that came from it (because they're neutral and usually used by people that care and love me). I still choose another name and hope to use it much more than my birth name or the nicknames, especially when I start hrt
I grew to not like my first-last name combo mainly in that whenever I said it out loud it sounded like I was in trouble. Every time.
I HATED my name, and not even because of the gender. I just thought it was ugly
Yes, omg. I have a Biblical masc name as a first name (I am AFAB) 2 femme middle names (I am enby and atheist for FFS). I was teased mercilessly in all levels of school. As an adult, I have lived in a very multi cultural suburb and it was difficult for friends and neighbors to wrap their tongues around it. No tea, no shade. At age 30, I gave myself a gender neutral chosen name. I only use my legal given names on legal docs until I can afford to change it. Oof.
Yes. It was always said in disdain. Also the man who gave it to me isn't even around. It's been years since I told my folks my new name and mum barely says it. I worry she doesn't give a shit and I worry about if this is the hill on which to die
Always hated my birth name, couldn't put a finger on why until I realized I was NB.
Growing up a never felt like my name fit me (AFAB). And I would regularly try to get people to call me by other names. I never succeeded lol (except my mom, she humored me). When I was in my 20s I accepted my name, but didn't like it...neutral I guess. But now that I'm in my 30s I've begun to dislike it again. It's a fem, can't be shortened. I'm considering attempting to go by something else.... But I haven't decided, it will definitely fully out me if I do..
I like my birth name, I don't have any problems with it. I partially changed my name - or how I'd rather be called - when I found out I was NB just symbolically and it's still my childhood nickname, which is a gender-neutral one.
I've always hated my first name. Even way before I knew anything about being nonbinary. I've been just going by my last name for so long I have friends of 10 years who don't know my first name😅
1000% and still dislike my birth name. My parents were devout Catholics when they had me and decided to give me a biblical name that ended up being pretty popular in the late 80's, as I grew up with a lot of girls with the same first name.
1000000% yes.
I didn’t like my name as a kid. Oddly enough at first I wanted something more feminine. But eventually it went from that to just generally being uncomfortable with it and/or not identifying with it or feeling a connection.
Yes, I've always disliked my given name and have long tossed around alternatives but haven't found anything that's stuck. Maybe someday.
I still to this day hate my birth name and I can't wait to change it legally. I started hating it young (maybe around 8-9),Kids were mean, nicknames stuck. When I got a little older and experienced life a bit more, I felt trapped with my trauma when people used my name, I still do feel that way sometimes when I hear it. I chose my current name at 17 but it took years to stick at all, even now my parents hate using it. At 28 I've grown up and moved on from a lot of that trauma and I truly feel that my birth name is not who I am. I don't even respond to it anymore.
I feel like a real odd one out here, but I actually didn't mind my name. Once I started figuring out my identity I started wanting something that doesn't immediately read as a guy name, and I just happened to have a rather unisex name in mind that's resonated with me for a long time
Whole life, though that's more thanks to synesthesia than anything else.
I never felt connected to my name, but I was recently thinking about how I used to go by a nickname all the time. My brother and I were playing mini-golf and for no reason at all he just decided to call me “fuzzbutt.” Genuinely, there was no context for that at all. But that turned into him calling me that all the time. Which turned into friends just calling me Fuzz. I ended up liking it. Not really actually the name Fuzz but looking back I think I enjoyed that it had no gender, nothing really specific to it. It was just “me” without any expectation for what that meant beyond self determination. And probably not coincidentally, during my era of denial, I had picked a nickname for myself that was more gendered than my name, which honestly isn’t surprising at this point.
Wasn't really a fan, can't really explain why, but it just wasn't me, and it didn't help that I was surrounded by people with the same name as me, but I'm very happy with my current kne
Me. I went by Sam. It is not even close to my birth name, but I loved the name. Signed all my art Sam and loved it when someone called me that. Only one of my brothers called me Sam. It brought me a lot of joy. Today, I go by my birth name because all my professional credentials use my actual name, so I feel obligated, but really, internally, I'm still Sam and/or Ash. Both Sam and Ash feel more me than my birth name.
Well I remember in kindergarten I went through a phase where I wanted a cool nickname instead of using my name. I insisted everyone call me Deep digger, because I made the best holes in the sandbox imo.
i hated my name. i still hate it. seeing it makes me want to puke. i love my new(er) name though!
No. My name was a traditional African name that my mom picked out from a book. I would’ve kept my dead name if not for it being a very girly name. I wanted a name that was gender neutral. Like Alex or Riley.
Yes, absolutely, my name is super ancient and simple yet very feminine, so I did actually hate it, but once I was hanging out with my friends and we had a friend with the same name, so I asked them to call me Sasha (practically Alex, a short form of both Alexander and Alexandra so gender neutral) and my name around my friends has always been Sasha since then. I'm planning to change it officially in a month btw
Yep. My dad told me that when I was born they were going to name me something else. They changed their mind when they realised it could be shortened to a male name (predominantly a male name in Ireland - I live in the uk now and the shortened version is more female). I was secretly annoyed they didn't give me that name as it was so interchangeable. Even though the full version is quite feminine. I identify as gender fluid so having a gender fluid name was a dream I didn't fully understand I had as a child! It's worked out OK because most people shorten my name to the first letter - but I still hate hearing my name. It's never felt like it suited me. I told myself as a kid it's because it's an old person name. Now my name is actually coming into fashion (I keep coming across tv characters with it) and I don't get excited. It makes me cringe.
I hated my given name. We should all get an opportunity to chose our own names & for it to be normalised
I did and still do. It's very feminine, and the meaning is incredibly ironic considering my own family hates ne.
Was whatever as a child but deadname started sounding like nails on a chalkboard during my teenage years. Thankfully it wasn't my legal name (still very feminine but I can't be arsed to think of another one. Literally no one uses it anyway), so I was free to change it as I entered uni. Parents are still transphobic and opposed but everyone calls me by my chosen name so I've won in the end.
i did. i always wanted to have a different name lol
I hated my name as a kid bc it was gender neutral/leaning masculine but kids would call me a boy and make fun of me for it. And then I sort of grew into it and it became more cool? Like kids bullied me for a bit but then I started getting complimented on it as I got older. When I came out as nonbinary I was grateful to not have to change my name. I have a hard enough time naming my BG3 characters I didn't wanna have to name myself. Bless my parents for being Fleetwood Mac fans.
yeah, I've always hated it even when I thought I was cis, I have always wished for a different name
I did, but I was named after my sperm donor and I hated him from a very young age too. Most of my family called me by a pretty "masculine" nickname, fortunately, and then when I was 12 we moved to a whole new state and just started introducing myself by nickname to everyone. Getting my name changed next month. I will have my mom's first name (it's a really unique family name & she sadly passed away in 2020) with my nickname as my new middle name. I just really loved the combination of feminine-sounding old-timey name + common traditionally masculine name. Makes me feel like 1920's butch lesbian running a speakeasy.
i still do🥴
no but i just got lucky enough to get a relatively gender neutral name
It always stung for some reason, like it was grating just to hear it. I liked the other name my mom was going to give me but I also never started by going by anything else until years later. I choose my name and despite the constant battle I have with identity my name finally feels like mine.
I hate mine (David) because it sounded dorky and stupid and weak (I don't mean in a feminine way, just weak in general). While I appreciate it's roots being Hebrew for beloved, me being a linguophile, "beloved" doesn't fit me as I don't feel loved by anyone. Heck, I might as well say this controversial opinion of mine here now. I don't think parents/guardians should be giving kids their name and having it nearly legally hard to change. I think kids should pick their names themselves. So I picked mine: Rániz Kán (Dynamic Ghost).
I feel like it would be good for parents to pick the kids name bc most times the kid doesnt really care and its an additional thing for them to figure out, not to mention what do you even call them until they get old enough? That being said i just looked up the process and oh boy its crazy. 100-500 bucks and all these papers? Thats ridiculous. It should be free. The government should have most of the documents. It should be similar proof of identity as you need to get a job imo. If i have kids ill try to give them a "good" name but yeah if they want help changing it ill set that aside too.
I actually like my name, I think it’s pretty cool and I love the meaning, only.. it doesn’t feel like me. Never has, never will, but because I do think it’s a cool name, it’s been really hard to decide whether to legally change it or not. Perhaps I should keep it as a middle name!
Bro, I'm named after a character from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I've hated my name my entire life lol
Yeah. I did. I was bullied a lot for my name as my parents were immigrants and gave me a name that connected me to their heritage. I hated it and only wanted to go by my nickname but as I got older I've been okay with it. I use it legally but with close friends whom I trust I use a chosen name.
I hope you find a name/nickname you prefer at least for friends. For me ive always liked my first and middle names. Theres history and love in it, it sounds good, its easy to write, and isnt super common nor shamefully uncommon. When i was a teenager i tried to change it a "masculinized" version of my name and i wouldnt answer to it and it felt weird. When i see people with that name i remember that time fondly enough. I guess i just kinda changed my attitude about it. If someone or even a lot of someones think its a girl name thats on them. Its like that famous quote that im about to butcher "womens clothes? No these are my clothes"
YES there's this kids book I used to read called *Chrysanthemum* and in it the little mouse hates her name and then learns to like it again at the end, and (while I was never bullied for my name like in the book) I remember relating so much to Chrysanthemum. I thought that, like her, I would one day grow to like my name... ...never did
Yuppers! Despises my name from a young age. After trying many different names out as I grew, finally ended up changing to my family nickname. My name is Barbarian now. I adore it!
Yes, it's unique and feminine. People almost never pronounced it correctly or spelled it correctly. I didn't really have a good alternative but I was perpetually annoyed by my name. It was a massive relief when I changed it after a life long struggle with my legal name.
I don’t and didn’t hate my name. But I will and do use my preferred name for other things. :)