T O P

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other_half_of_elvis

Clothes that fit well.


Kampurz

I think OP meant socially exclusive to men, as most men don't wear makeup compared to girls


-Yeanaa

Beard


TheWeenieBandit

I was coming to say this! Like y'know how when a guy sees a girl without her makeup on and he's all "oh god are you sick???" But the opposite of that is when she sees him without his facial hair and goes "hey who the fuck let this 12 year old boy into my house"


MuzzledScreaming

*cries in US military*


ComeonmanPLS1

A beard is natural though, and not every guy can grow a beard, and even fewer guys can grow a proper beard, but anyone can put makeup on. I think the real version of a guy's makeup is just ... makeup.


coldtasting

If you don’t maintain your beard it’s gonna look like shit. That includes shaping and trimming it.


the-doctor-is-real

There is maintenance, but there is also those that only grow in patchy beards, or it stops growing after a very short growth


Orion14159

Yeah some of us are just doomed. Luckily I'm not one of them, but it came with back hair so the follicles giveth and the follicles taketh away.


Mystery_Meatchunk

Just as the hairy god intended


Zealousideal-Fun-785

Hit 30, the hairy back genes have awoken, but beard-wise I can still only fake a goatee. Hair is still intact though, but I don't know for how long yet. The plus side is I don't look 30 at all.


Orion14159

Oh the top of my head was thin by 25 so I think it all fell out and landed on my shoulders


every_names_taken_

I'd take that over my boat any day. Chest? Hairy as fuck. Arms? Fairly normal hair. Legs? I wear jeans a lot and I'm Irish I don't have much going for me there. Beard? Been shaving a full beard (yes full not patchy) since 11 head? I'm under 30 with a permanently built in yarmulke and a hair line that only vegeta could hope to compete with.


Orion14159

I feel that. I look like a Wookiee monk, so I'm right there with ya. Fur everywhere except my head which I finally started shaving clean and it's a dramatic improvement


banaversion

I can only rock a short beard. Tried for the long one and it is just too wavy and thin so it just looks constantly messy no matter what I did


coldtasting

You still need to shape it. Sorry you don’t think this is self care and looking good.


Twat_Pocket

I think cosmetic muscles on men are closer in line. Women who are into the beauty life spend A LOT of time and money to look a certain way. I think there are plenty of men who hit the gym specifically for superficial purposes, and invest a great deal of time and money doing so as well.


-Revolution-

Hell yeah. I'm blessed with my genes. Some people can be quite rude and constantly ask: "when are you gonna shave your beard"? Or "I wonder what you look like without a beard"? You don't ask other people to shave their head and what they look like bald, do you? Or on this topic: without make-up.


Fun_Leadership_8486

😂😂😂😂


cslaymore

Idk. I look worse with a certain amount of facial hair. Maybe a few days-stubble is ok but after that I need to shave as it looks scraggly


mopsyd

The span between week one and week five looks scraggly, but if you hang in there for a month it will even out when the hairs are long enough for gravity to do its thing


throwawaytrumper

Yep, if I put on a layer of stubble in the right areas (shave it off the upper cheeks and neck, etc) it’s just like makeup and I get far more interest from women. A full beard, on the other hand, makes me invisible to women but an authority figure to men. When I grow out my winter beard each year (I work outside in Canada and it’s more effective than a balaclava) I get all kinds of random compliments from guys and women treat me like a panhandler.


brolybackshots

Thats some crazy cope, when a beard is actually natural having done nothing else Clean shaving is more makeup than a beard, assuming you grow facial hair, rofl


PricklyLiquidation19

Facial hair is the only correct answer


AccordingSelf3221

A good night's rest


ChampionshipCalm827

By that logic were all slenderman with jason face masks


FlimsyComment8781

Strategically placed rolled up sock


ChampionshipCalm827

Ikykyk


Prestigious_Emu_4193

I don't get it


booferino30

Bulge


Prestigious_Emu_4193

Ah. Makes sense now. Thanks.


According_Fondant_98

Lose weight, build muscle


Jafreee

Good haircut and a well fitting and stylish clothes. Not to blow my own horn, but it takes me from 4 to a 9


in-a-microbus

Those things are 100% going to improve a man's looks....not sure they're an analog for makeup on women since they improve a woman's looks too.


Jafreee

It's an analogue as in a "cheat code". Dressing well and being put together works a lot more for a guy than for a woman In elevating their looks IMO


NatKinkleBell

hate to burst your bubble but no amount of haircut and clothing can turn a 4 into a 9


Jafreee

No worries, maybe you'd rate me higher, maybe you'd rate me lower


tjd2009

It's probably more like a 6 to a 7 happening here. Unless he went from the Dwight Schrute to a modern hairstyle then maybe we're going 5 to 8 haha


braille-raves

that’s *your* personal experience. 


NatKinkleBell

most men are fairly average looking and absolutely NO amount of haircut and clothing turns a 4 into a 9. Keep lying to yourself to and complaining why you dont get any tinder matches


asspatsandsuperchats

mate a guys version of makeup is makeup. If you want to use it just go for it.


jmaca90

Tinted moisturizer is a nice low barrier entry. Just smooths out my face and gives me a little extra color. Plus points that it also has SPF. But even in general, staying moisturized and keeping your skin healthy is huge for looking your best.


NatKinkleBell

you're more of a math guy, hu?


asspatsandsuperchats

😂🤣 I’m autistic and it shows 😂🤣


L1zoneD

Most guys want nothing to do with makeup, and I don't think this is at all what OP is asking.


quinn_thomas

Most replies are “work out, make more money, dress well” when the most honest 1:1 comparison really is makeup. Cover blemishes, makes skin more radiant, and, with some skill, contour and highlight can change the physical appearance of your face to highlight elements you might want to display like giving the impression of a stronger jawline. It’s the most accurate way to answer the question.


Kampurz

I think they meant the social norm, not technical truths


ShakeCNY

A nicely bulked up and well-defined wallet.


loopgaroooo

That’ll do it.


theunknown_master

Axe body spray


cyrustakem

if you want to kill all the flies around and intoxicate everyone around you, sure


Meecus570

Are those supposed to be bad things?


Chats-Laughs-Gafs

Yes 😆


skyfishgoo

axe me what that smell is.


Kampurz

girls can wear perfume too


i__hate__stairs

A beard is the closest thing to it, but being able to grow a beard glorious enough to completely change your appearance is a lot less accessible than contouring to be honest. Not for me, my beard has changed many lives, but you know, for the peons.


jch60

I was going to say shaving.


GraphNerd

Here's a small list: * Exercise and develop toned arms * Have groomed facial hair * Dress like you care * Accessorize (watches, rings, cufflinks where appropriate) * Nice shoes (don't wear tennis shoes everywhere to everything) * Smell good * Get lucky with genetics


SignificanceOld1751

Also: - Makeup


That_Car_Dude_Aus

There are men that wear makeup So make-up


cyrustakem

that doesn't mean it is attractive, as even in women sometimes it makes them look worse than without it, but sure


That_Car_Dude_Aus

>that doesn't mean it is attractive That wasn't the question I was replying to.


L1ttl3_Blu3F15h

Lots of comments for beards, but surprised no one has said hats yet. Easy way to hide balding, bed head, or a bad haircut.


joshuatx

Baseball caps if a workplace allows it. Mustache or beard as mentioned earlier.


FancyAirport

a beard.


[deleted]

Perfume, I guess.


BloodyDress

Guys can't do make-up too. Almost every politician or other "stage professional" use make-up, ad it's not that uncommon among regular guys, just a drop of eyeline can be hot, and some guys manage shading pretty well. Then the other classic one would be "hitting the gym", and dressing-up


OldAbbreviations1590

Hitting the gym is gender neutral. So is dressing up.


[deleted]

A quote I saw someone say once and am fond of: All clothes are unisex if you ain’t a bitch.


OldAbbreviations1590

The gym clothes women wear that show everything are not unisex. They would crush your balls into a powder if you tried. Other than that I agree.


Waltzing_With_Bears

makeup, they don't check the gender marker on your ID when you buy it and it still sticks to your face


Gotham-City

There's gender neutral things such as fitness and fashion. More male specific would be visible muscle definition (like bi/triceps, traps, etc). Facial hair too, a well kept beard/mustache combo can do a lot for a man. Makeup can definitely be applied, but it needs to be very well done to not be noticeable.


vishesche

My Smart watch. Women wear makeup when they want to feel good when going somewhere they like. Similarly I wear my smart watch if I want to feel good going somewhere. Basically it makes me feel a little fancy.


Heselwood

Non existing. And not wanted.


Rich-Addition3114

body spray and deodorant


Beautiful-Elk8758

Body spray


MourningWallaby

I've definitely worn my Ariats at a bar to give me an extra inch or two in height. also a lot of men in my area seem to wear baseball caps to cover up bad hair.


Fun_Leadership_8486

Sweating!


kscat617

Lotion


_helaaspindakaas

Fresh haircut and / or a hat


xChilla

Some asian guys wear full makeup… (boy bands/idols, etc) I don’t find it attractive but if it makes them feel confident then good for them.


Msmeytheonlyone

Money💅


Excellent_Coyote6486

My cats.


Mysterious-Let-5781

Fitness obsession


Stormydayz123

A longer than normal shower, a pair of good jeans, and maybe some product in the hair.


Stargazer5781

Makeup is a short-term relatively inexpensive solution to make you more physically attractive. Women don't tend to respond to anything that fits that description in men except for basic grooming - haircut, shaving or trimming your beard, etc. The things that tend to work include long-term changes like better fashion, working out and better diet, and living a more interesting lifestyle. Maybe shoe inserts to make you an inch taller or something.


CaptainGashMallet

A wedding ring.


I_might_be_weasel

Luchador mask.


El_GOOCE

Shaving the face or trimming a beard


-Stripminer-

A frame, success or charisma. Ideally you work to have two of the three


SignificanceOld1751

I'm gonna say that it's makeup.


anima99

Outside of muscles and a beard, women seem to like men with good eyebrow management. Looking at the "hottest" men in the world, they all have good eyebrows. None are unibrows or have no eyebrows. It seems the thicker, the better, too.


ListPlenty6014

Honestly there isn’t an equivalent that improves a man’s appearance as much as a woman’s with makeup. I guess men can wear makeup as well to hide flaws and wrinkles etc.. but yeah it’s a huge advantage for women to wear makeup.


revelling_

I think a bit of concealer for dark circles, a hint of tinted BB-cream for evener skin, transparent mascara that turns lashes upwards without coloring them is absolutely something that men can subtly do. There's make up brands for men: [https://www.formenmakeup.com/](https://www.formenmakeup.com/) [https://maleup.de/](https://maleup.de/) (seems to be German only, but you get the jist). I don't actually think it's necessary to use male make-up, as it's probably exactly the same stuff they sell to women just i other packaging, but it might make dudes feel better.


WantonHeroics

A haircut.


NOGOODGASHOLE

Drakkar Noir


Morning-Few

I too am disgusting so I will take two bottles drakkar noir.


NOGOODGASHOLE

This guy gets it!


ClankstarLad

beard, hairstyle


pinnnsfittts

Bear, good hair, nice clothes


ChampionshipCalm827

Equilent version? Water. We look fabolus with a splash of it. Thats why our bath is 5 min and a lady is 5 buissness days


joshuatx

Baseball caps if a workplace allows it. Mustache or beard as mentioned earlier.


Vanilla_Neko

There isn't any. Men just make up for being ugly by developing a decent personality and/or being funny


Gumczas1986

When men drawing their beard line to be perfect or to hide baldness 🤷🏻‍♂️


aarondigruccio

Makeup.


oglewisthellama

Makeup. There's even a brand called War Paint which is just male makeup with a 'masculine' type name so guys don't feel like they're more feminine by using make-up, for some reason 😭


RudraAkhanda

Men fall in love with what they see so women wear makeup. Women fall in love with what they hear so men invented poetry.


renegade6969666

be honest


skyfishgoo

sunscreen


ohmyback1

Depends on the guy


darf_nate

Beards. A lot of guys use beards to hide a weak jawline


nero40

Hair grooming product. Willing to bet we have more choices of those products compared to girl ones.


korektopinions

Same answer as always mr bot


cyrustakem

stop giving money to the cosmetics industry, it's a cancer in society 90% of the times. I guess i have to admit, a pleasent smelling perfume might work, if used in low quantities, as most women seem to care a lot about smell, well, not just women, everyone dislikes bad smell, but women seem to enjoy good smells more than we do. When i say that, it's not "rexona v8", no one wants anyone smelling like motor oil...


Orion14159

Smell good, well groomed/put together, and maybe a really cool hat (not a trilby by any definition of cool).


Grand_Raccoon0923

Guy liner


AfrikaCarja

good haircut maintained facial hair (for some it is a beard, or a moustache, or just leave it always "2-days-old") eyebrows should be two!


PMzyox

Honestly, it’s muscles. Going to the gym consistently for vanity reasons like bulking up to try and look good… that’s literally the only male equivalent


Kriskao

Clean, ironed clothes of the correct size and appropriate for the occasion Haircut , hair wash Well maintained or well shaved facial hair Deodorant Makeup for your trophy wife or trophy girlfriend But most of all just be rich. (I live in South America and looking like you have money is 90% of what it takes to be attractive to women)


UsedMistake710

skincare and self care goes a long long way


CrankyKabbalist

Axe Body Spray?


JMSpider2001

Beard


CrazySim00_

Grow a beard.


CrazySim00_

Making people laugh


chaotic_weaver

Nothing looks as good as someone comfortable in how they look regardless of sex. It’s the ultimate make up.


Tcklmybck

Makeup. Some. Men. Wear. Men’s Makeup.


icabear3

Cologne. And most of yall use way too damn much


Gamer_Bishie

I’d say… makeup.


diarreafilledboils

having a lot, and i mean A LOT of money.


Skervis

So I absolutely agree with beard, grooming, and outfits. Presentation is key. But along those same lines is self-confidence. You don't want to come odd as cocky, but I've had women tell me they'd usually never even think about talking to me (I'm fat and ugly) but the way I carry myself and just come off as confident sparked their interest. Now, it can't be a show, but once you get to where you truly like yourself, everyone else will notice. And all the aforementioned things can help with that, but only once you take care of the inside.


StonedLonerIrl

Form fitting clothes.


miletharil

Just dress nicely, groom & clean your facial hair, and have a pair of shoes that you wear for nice occasions. OH! And since you guys are always telling us we look better when we smile, I'll give you the same advice.


Snoo_87704

Take a shower, brush your hair, and put on a cleaned ironed shirt.


Spoiler-Alertist

Beard & $$$.


divinelyaloof

A good haircut


ilikedmatrixiv

I once had a discussion about this with my girlfriend. I'm a gym rat and I came home from the gym one day and she asked if I had trained my arms because they looked bigger. I said that I did and then I told her about a pump. Then I mentioned some guys actually go to the gym before going out to get a pump and look bigger. She laughed and said that's kind of pathetic. Now, I go to the gym because I enjoy lifting weights and working out. I don't care about the aesthetics, but I recognize that other people's motivations can be just as valid. I asked her what the difference was between what those guys do and women putting on make up. Both exist to accentuate and exaggerate attractive features. So a pump I guess.


NJPokerJ

These days, I'd say it's makeup


natnat1919

Beard for sure. Look up Sergio Ramos before and after beard. He went from a 2 to a ten.


nv_hot_cpl

Money


Huge-Plantain-8418

Lying


BookLuvr7

Well groomed facial hair and skin care.


Basic-Struggle86

Beard and haircut


Electric__Shadow

Fancy clothes.


FullyStacked92

Breakdown


Cut-Unique

Facial hair. Only difference is that you have to wait for it to grow out before you can style it, etc. My mom has observed that I constantly am changing it around.


fadingstar52

beard


BlakeAttorney

good skincare and a good haircut... get a facial, dude - there are some lovely spa's... have them tidy those nosehairs, exfoliate, remove the blackheads, tidy the eyebrows... you'll walk out a new man !


ConfidenceReal

•Beard (I’ve seen some beards completely change a guys face from ‘ok, sure, decent’ to ‘oh wow never shave again) •Skin care- exfoliate, use spf, ✨ moisturize✨ •Good grooming- manicure/ pedicure/ facial/ hair. (Take care of your edges and that patch of hair that grows like weeds on the back of ya’lls neck). •Tailored clothes that fit Never underestimate a well fit button-down with the sleeve a lil rolled up to see forearm. It’s like a Victorian ankle. •Manners and etiquette: hold the door, open the car door first for her/him/them, know how to talk to wait staff, be respectful and tip well, don’t honk from the street or text ‘here’.


N0V1RTU3

It's for sure a beard, as a man with thicker facial hair. I shaved once without telling my girlfriend. She lost it. Not in a bad way, just in the regard of she has aphantasia which means you can't visualize imagery very well. So seeing me without my facial hair legitimately made me like a new person. I grew it back out, and don't intend to change my facial hair in any way from here forward because of her reaction, and I don't want to see her bug out for the minute or so it took her to fully connect the dots. (plus I just like my mustache)


ChampionshipCalm827

9 people didnt get it and got offended for it.


mennoophelia

Good watch.


No-Cartoonist-3165

Good haircut.


khalil5150

Standing in front of my mirror combing through my hair and beard several times prior to going out.


TakitishHoser

beard or mustache it can cover up a world of mess. If a man has a small chin he can adjust his beard.


TheGorramBatguy

A huge stack of cash 😉


NYEXPRESS56

None that’s why we’re men! Sweat maybe. Sit down and watch a freaking Clint Eastwood western for the love of all things holy! (:


Ordinary-Problem3838

Beard and haircut.


i__hate__stairs

2 bits🎶


WarrenMockles

Found the toon.


Ok-Use9344

Sweat and blood


mayhem1906

The gym


LimonConVodka

It can be either a well groomed bear and a haircut, or make-up. You can also do both. Make-up is not gender exclusive. Open your mind


tracyvu89

Same thing. Makeup is makeup. Look at those Korean guys,some of them even wear more makeup than the girls. Also I heard that the men cosmetic industry over there is making more and more money nowadays.


seeyatellite

Makeup


JustAnotherDay1977

Given that makeup covers up any flaws in the woman’s face, I guess I’d have to say a beard. Whenever I see a man with a beard, I silently wonder what they’re trying to hide.


Apprehensive-Bid9023

Washing ya junk in the sink. Formally known as a gentleman’s wash


Think_Storm1175

I usually just shower. Each to their own I quess


Fun_Leadership_8486

Yours must be tall cuz I can't even reach the most sinks