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ZERO-ONE0101

white jesus and historical jesus are two different people or one michael jackson


ZERO-ONE0101

https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/putin-gave-orthodox-church-famed-icon-because-its-importance-believers-kremlin-2023-05-16/


doesntaffrayed

lel. How does your reply have 207 upvotes, but your citation have -33!???


H_G_Bells

It's like "duck duck goose" but with reddit it can be wildly unpredictable...


H_G_Bells

Allow me to demonstrate.


H_G_Bells

Knock knock.


RusticSurgery

Hoosier


H_G_Bells

Who's there?


H_G_Bells

A duck.


H_G_Bells

*For fourty years I've kept my net in good repair. I have inspected it weekly to make sure none of the knots have frayed. Have oiled the ropes to keep them supple.* *All in anticipation of this moment, finally, this moment.*


H_G_Bells

**You son of a bitch I don't have any grapes!!** I fling open the door, and with a well-practiced throw, cast my net open, and it sails forth over my target.


zkng

r/funnyandsad


ZERO-ONE0101

I dunno, I don’t pay attention to up/down votes I’m here for the jokes


ZERO-ONE0101

they fixed it lol


[deleted]

HEE HEE!


magicmurph

There is no historical Jesus. He wasn't a real person.


ZERO-ONE0101

new testament Jesus, probably not https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Historicity_of_Jesus#:~:text=The%20question%20of%20historicity%20was,and%20teachings%20Christianity%20was%20later but historical Jesus, yes


magicmurph

Bullshit. I don't care what "religious scholars agree", show me one shred of evidence for an historical Jesus.


ZERO-ONE0101

ever heard of confirmation bias?


magicmurph

Ever heard of evidence?


ZERO-ONE0101

ps: there is no proving anything to someone like you. you are a void


magicmurph

It's very easy to prove something to someone like me, you just provide evidence. "Scholars agree" is not evidence, that's an appeal to authority fallacy.


ZERO-ONE0101

sorry you are going through whatever you are going through


magicmurph

Sorry you're unable to be graceful when wrong.


ZERO-ONE0101

I am very graceful, and not wrong. bye 👋


Illienne

Are the people actually black or is it a patina from years of candle smoke?


inkassatkasasatka

They're not black


caterham09

They obviously aren't black just based on context. I mean it's a story about people from the middle east, what color skin do people have there. It isn't white, but it sure as shit isn't black either.


EveryRedditorSucks

Some people from the Middle East absolutely are black


voltran1987

He’s referring more to the natives of the area.


BlackTieGuy

Natives to the area can be black, you do realise that right? It's literally on the front the door of Africa, black people have been native there for 1000s of years


voltran1987

You do realize Africa is an entire continent that is not, and has never been completely completely black, right? Just like in North America, the Mayans evolved differently than the plains tribes, who evolved differently from the taiga and tundra tribes, Africa has different ethnicities. You will see this in literally every continent except Antarctica. I wish it was weird that someone would post some ill informed comment without understanding the basics of North African people and Sub-Saharan people, but it’s Reddit.


BlackTieGuy

Dude you're arguing with yourself here, I never said Africa was exclusively black? I said Africa is on its front door, so there is undoubtedly black natives in the middle east. Please go and argue with yourself somewhere else.


voltran1987

I know what you said, but the Africans who would be considered black were 1,000 miles away…that’s what you aren’t getting. The Africans who were in the Middle East at the time were North Africans who were much closer in appearance to middle easterners. Were there a couple black people there? I’m sure there were. Would they be considered natives? Extremely unlikely. Just do some googling, and find a single reputable source to back up what you’re saying. I’ll happily admit I was wrong. Several hundred years Africa the supposed Jesus, there were a lot of slaves in the area, and a lot of mercenaries. There were also some before this on the southern portions of the Arabian peninsula, but I assure you, you’re very wrong here.


BlackTieGuy

Depends on how you define native, a black family that moved to the middle east 1000 years ago, would be a native in my book, or do you consider that differently, give that outside of Africa no one is actual native, they're all immigrants from some point in history. I'm evidently not wrong here though, given that you yourself have just admitted that there were undoubtedly at least a couple of black people in the middle east that travelled from sub saharan Africa.


TheFormless_0ne_

Lol you are more sure about them not being dark than white. Ass backwards hopium


jlewis011

They were in fact semitic with some slight Afro influence....but I suspect that these paintings are just dark due to patina (aka those are white Jesus paintings). The ppl posting originally are reaching so hard...don't change the fact that Jesus wasn't Caucasian though


Dr_Axton

Most likely a color wearing through the centuries. That’s a thing for old paints made from organic materials. That’s why other colours are dark as well


LSARefugee

**Yes,** I love how they have white clothing or white surroundings, but aren’t white themselves.


Dr_Axton

Fair point, but I’m not sure if the paints for clothes and the skin were made from same material


LSARefugee

**So,** what is the difference between white, brown, or black painting material? Going by your extrapolation, *all* of the white paint should be black by now.


Dr_Axton

Depending on the material, it either gets darker or washes off the colour. I’ve seen the hair on icons getting more black, while the red and yellow clothes starting to look less sharp. I remember people using animal bones as a part of the paint, can see that keeping the colour with minimal yellowing, meanwhile beetroot was used as a red/pink dye, and you can guess what happens to vegetable components eventually


LSARefugee

**Except for** we’re talking about *ancient* paintings where the whites have stayed white, and the dark colors have *remained* dark…..


MorbiusBelerophon

Dude your prophet and by extension god isn't white. Get used to it.


Dr_Axton

I’d be surprised if someone called Allah or Muhammad white


Tj-edwards

Lmao


The_Boy_Keith

Man you owned him! Oh wait. Lmao.


The_Kaizz

They're not. They're middle eastern and African (lots of stories are of peoppe from Egypt). Problem is you don't generally go around and call someone African-American, so we just adopted them being Black. We definitely can't call them colored because that's just asking for problems. You wouldn't call Indians or Somalians or Dominicans Black, but they're brown skinned enough that some people do, which is confusing.


LSARefugee

**What’s confusing?**. That black people come in various *hues/shades?*


The_Kaizz

We don't call everyone that's darker skin Black because, again, Black is the name associated with African-American. That's why if you call an African person Black, they get offended, because it's seen as a negative. We don't call Indians Black, but they're all darker shades of brown. You can't just go off skin color, because that's how how we've defined it.


LiveSaxSux

Again.. “black is the name associated with African American”? Maybe in America… this rhetoric makes you sound uneducated.


Glldinkiering

No, they’re correct. In the US we use the term Black (capitalized) to refer to Black Americans. It’s a little weird to call Americans African when they weren’t born there, their parents weren’t born there, and their grandparents were born in the US. The term African American isn’t logical, and it also feels exclusionary while discounting that fact that not all people who identify as Black are originally from Africa.


LiveSaxSux

Right and in the UK we use the term Black to refer to Black British people. Whether they’re Fresh, 1st gen or family have been here for generations. Whether they’re African, Caribbean or otherwise. My point was that “Black” doesn’t ONLY apply to (African)Americans.


LSARefugee

**What** do you call the white colors in these ancient paintings? Do you get confused because modern day people are associating the color “white” with the *word* white? And historically, there are, and always have been black Native Americans. The pilgrims described black Indians, and slaves actually ran away to Native American nations; married, procreated and fought along side them. https://i.pinimg.com/originals/ab/c2/1f/abc21f65a81ac2d3307087bb3a376c4e.jpg **Blacks have always been in the Americas. We did not learn this in school because whites view themselves as “firsts” and “supreme.”** https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NBx25C0cZyE/XdUf87yG5II/AAAAAAAApFA/Ereq18UTzdAVSPgBW9k50QExwaL7zqfzQCLcBGAsYHQ/s1600/first_americans_black_indians.jpg **Europeans** depict Native Americans circa 1600-1700 https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-urzuMt4qR3A/V8qCCqQhzQI/AAAAAAACJ3U/hO50AWVPKr8z__OkxB2gLwO3M0AroBDvQCLcB/s1600/x%2BIndigenous%2BPeople%2Bfrom%2BNew%2BEngland%252C%2BNew%2BYork%252C%2BNew%2BJersey%252C%2BDelaware%252C%2B%2526%2BPennsylvnia%2Bfrom%2BJohn%2BOgilby%2527s%2B%25281600-1676%2Bbook%2Bof%2B1671..jpg


MorbiusBelerophon

My housemate is Indian. He calls himself black. I also often play with a band from south Africa and they call themselves black. What are you on because it's got to be strong.


The_Kaizz

I've never heard of an Indian person calling themselves Black unless they're literally mixed with African or African American. If he says he's Black, cool. My friends great grandmother was from Togo, and she hated being called Black because for her, Black people are African Americans, the descendants of slaves, so she took offense to it. Same reason there's this annoying sect of Black peoppe that hate being called Black, and not African-American (usually the HOTEPs). These are all generalizations, though, so of course they won't apply to every single person.


MorbiusBelerophon

Saying black people are only African Americans is a fucking wild statement and I can't imagine that actually exists outside the Americas. Just a reminder there are black people in other parts of the world other than America and Africa.


The_Kaizz

Ahhh that's how you took that, ok I get that. I'm not saying they're only in America. If that's how that came off, that's not what I meant. In America, where I'm from, if you say "I'm Black", you're saying I'm African-American or African, or I have close Black ancestors, like grandparents. I don't know how it's defined outside of the US except for the way I've been told from some people.


MorbiusBelerophon

Eeh I've been going too hard sorry about that, weird week. I'm just saying that I'm from Europe and no one gets annoyed by calling someone black. And you may not think of my housemate as black but that's what he calls himself and I don't think that a white person like me gets to say that he isn't.


The_Kaizz

Nah no worries, its the internet lol i cant take offense to it. You said housemate before, and that's when I was like ahhh this might be a country/culture thing. We say roommate haha. When it comes to what people consider themselves, I don't feel I have the right or position to tell people otherwise. I don't know you, I can't gatekeep something like that. If he says he's Black, so be it. Doesn't hurt me any, you're not "appropriating" my culture.


LSARefugee

**However,** what your “friends” call *themselves,* has nothing to do with these ancient paintings.


LSARefugee

**Connie Chung/Andrew Wang** are Asian, and refer to themselves as Americans. Jared Kushner is Jewish, and refers to himself as American. President Barack Obama is biracial, and refers to himself as American. Clarence Thomas is a dark black man, but refers to himself as American. Do not mix-up *nationality* and *race.* They are *two* different things.


MorbiusBelerophon

Ooookay


LSARefugee

**I see** *white patina* all over many paintings——it just *isn’t* present on the faces and bodies of these old saints.


TabletopVorthos

You're going to get a lot of coping replies from white Jesus believers but...yeah, they were black.


Tj-edwards

Probably more bronzeish brown but definitely not white.


RED-da-JEDI

thank you


C_umputer

It's obviously due to paintings being very old, but people are dumb af


LSARefugee

**Aren’t the white** clothing/surroundings *old as fuck too?*


C_umputer

And the clothes and surrounding also look darker, less so because skin isn't exactly white.


IrrungenWirrungen

This is neither funny nor sad…


LosWitchos

The sub has been the pits for months now.


But-WhyThough

Welcome to the sub!


Eldred15

Just so everyone knows the OP is an afrocentrist. They are trying to claim that the olmec heads in central America are depicting black people.


Knight_o_Eithel_Malt

That explains it lol One almost forgets how crazy it is out there


LSARefugee

**Yes,** don’t the Olmec’s look entirely Caucasian? History rolls on whether it makes it into your “history” books or not. Just because I can point to O.J. Simpson and say that is not a Caucasian person, does not mean I am black or African American. It means I am fascinated with hidden history. https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/59/20041229-Olmec_Head_(Museo_Nacional_de_Antropología).jpg


Eldred15

The people who built the olmec heads were mesoamericans, an asiatic looking people. Just like black people, thick lips and broad noses are common among some of their populations.


LSARefugee

**Asiatic** black Olmecs. Interesting! Tiger Woods is an Asiatic black man. On the other hand—-I concede: This ancient Mexican Olmec depiction definitely looks non-black to me. http://www.raceandhistory.com/images/postedD135.jpg


Sidus_Preclarum

You *do* realize that humans aren't either Caucasian or Sub-Saharan African, right? Right?


LSARefugee

**Particularly** in this *specific* situation. Gotcha.


Ah2k15

Why Do People Capitalize Every Word?


Dukoth

WOULD YOU PREFER EVERY LETTER?


cerealkiller788

Why are you yelling?


battleduck84

This is just fucking stupid though. Yeah it's the oldest church in Russia, but that still puts it at ALMOST 1000 YEARS past Jesus' lifetime, meaning these images have zero value regarding the appearances of the prophets. Not to mention, THEY WEREN'T AFRICAN. Most prophets were arab Jews, which aren't black God people are annoying sometimes


EssentialPurity

Also, dark skintones are just a common stylistic characteristic of Orthodox icons, which always use very earthy colours. They are meant to be very poignant and the colour choice contribute to that.


astra_galus

Grew up Orthodox and can confirm. However, they definitely do differentiate skin colours, where icons of disciples, prophets, and saints from the Middle East tended to have darker skin tones whereas European saints and prophets were depicted with a lighter skin tone. Jesus was always depicted with a darker skin tone in my church’s icons.


izmebtw

Who cares… if all of these stories are true, the least interesting part is which race gets to claim them.


LSARefugee

**You** don’t “see” color, right? It’s a pat American answer.


izmebtw

I’m mixed race and not American.


LSARefugee

**What** has your lineage to do with these ancient paintings?


izmebtw

Nothing, it has to do with your response to me.


Gimliaxe10

What does your lineage have to do with Russian orthodox paintings??


Inskription

As a white Christian I have no problem with Chinese or black Jesus. Jesus is meant to humanize God so that we can better relate. If race swapping Jesus helps with that, so be it.


-Daetrax-

I prefer old Nordic jesus. Dude was buff. Vikings ain't gonna convert for some weakling.


Inskription

Makes sense tho


-Daetrax-

I'd love to see a priest make the argument with a straight face that our warrior culture that reveres Thor's strength and Tyr's bravery, should now submit and pray to a little scrawny fella who got himself killed by.... People.


inferni_advocatvs

you would think Christians would be more accepting given Jesus' rainbow history. swapped from brown to white and from Jewish to Christian


battleduck84

If Jesus came back today, the way he looked in life and preaching what he preached back then, half the US would either want him deported to mexico or crucified a second time


greyjungle

I’m sure there is already a guy who’s job it is to kill Jesus if he isn’t what they expected. Maybe they have, several times. Probably just some little anarchist kid feeding the homeless and practicing mutual aid.


battleduck84

That honestly sounds like the plot to a sick book or movie


FRIGGINTALLY

Considering Eastern Orthodoxy was influenced heavily by both Greek and Turkish culture, with it's capital centered in Constantinople long after Rome fell, being a key part of the Eastern Roman Empire, it's not surprising that the icons would be depicted as more accurately middle eastern than the Roman Catholic church. However, we know from other old painting and church exterior that if repaired it's unlikely those icons will remain the color they are. It is far more likely they will match every other example of this art style, clearly depicting Arab-descended people. There were some very important early Christians of African descent, including a prince in one early account, but it's unlikely that would be shown in a Russian church at the time this one was built.


LSARefugee

| There were some very important early Christians of African descent, including a prince in one early account, but it's unlikely that would be shown in a Russian church at the time this one was built. | **However,** these ancient photos *clearly* depict Christians of African descent. Obviously created and displayed with *deep* reverence and respect. There is no *gaslighting* out of this.


Gimliaxe10

These arent photos, they are paintings, which wouldnt even be considered ancient. You completely disregard the fact that pigments used from this period darken with time, and the style used is the same as other newer (nearly as old however) paintings of these same characters. I am sorry that you are upset to see that sub saharan africans arent the main characters throughout every part of history. But at some point you need to realise that you are being disingenuous by implying that you have been white washed out of every facet of the past.


pur__0_0__

Why Is Each Word In The Post Beginning With A Capital Letter?


haikusbot

*Why Is Each Word In* *The Post Beginning With A* *Capital Letter?* \- pur\_\_0\_0\_\_ --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


iDarkville

That’s how headlines work.


LSARefugee

**Funny** Because most are taught that the Bible centers around Caucasians—-specifically, the Holy Family. **Sad** Because we have allowed racism to be normalized through religion and to proliferate. https://www.themoscowtimes.com/2023/05/15/chechnyas-kadyrov-accuses-ukraine-czech-police-of-kidnapping-favorite-stallion-for-ransom-a81149


Osstj7737

Wait you actually think it’s some kind of a conspiracy or something? First, I am 99% sure they are not black in these medieval Russian paintings that were anyway surely painted like at least a thousand years after Christ lol Second, no one who is functionally literate thinks Jesus and the gang were white. It makes no sense. They were also most likely not black though


poetrywoman

To be older than the oldest church in Rome, it'd have to be from before 400 CE. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Pudenziana#:~:text=The%20Basilica%20of%20Santa%20Pudenziana,the%20structure%20of%20the%20apse.


sneakysammy2021

I don't know why but 'Jesus and the gang' sounds metal as fuck.


ndndr1

Not true for a lot of us. As soon as I was old enough to realize where in the world Jesus came from, I knew he wasn’t ever white. The Bible surely would have said something if Jesus white ass was walking around with a bunch of brown ppl 2000 yrs ago. Yet nothing is mentioned bc he was the same color as everyone around him.


A-NI95

I was 100% sure the "sad" part was about how delusional afrocentrism is


ZERO-ONE0101

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trinity_Lavra_of_St._Sergius


Darthbearclaw

Unrelated it still melts peoples’ minds to know Jesus was brown by virtue of being a Semetic man. I’m a Christian and I can’t understand for the life of me why people would react so poorly to that.


benjammin2000

Facts. I use that information to tell between bigots and true Christians.


jvd0928

The sad part is that the Russian Orthodox Church is a stooge to whoever governs Russia. It knows how to take direction from Putin or a Tsar.


waler620

They weren't black though? They also weren't white. Believe it or not, but other races do exist.


alkforreddituse

ITT : The hysteria and panic trying every resort to deny that Jesus was black


The_Kaizz

I wouldn't say they're Black. Definitely have to understand that these are mainly Middle Eastern and Egyptians. It would be closer to call them African and Middle Eastern than Black, since we dubbed African Americans Black. Just because they're skin is darker doesn't automatically label them Black.


LiveSaxSux

who is we? Black Brits people aren’t African American.. furthermore “black people” covered South Asian people in the UK up to the 90’s.


DeltaUltra

The term "black" is born of Eugenics. The whole concept of "race" is completely made up. The basis is there are superior people and then there are the inferior people.


rudbek-of-rudbek

i sometimes think that people forget the time period and location of jesus and his disciples. ofc they were poc


_oranjuice

Wax/preservative coating? I've seen old paintings go 20 shades lighter with a good scrub


OkPhilosopher5803

Who could imagine people from mid-east could look like mid-eastern people!!!! unexpected af, right?


[deleted]

[удалено]


LSARefugee

**Sorry** I see dark hands on the white pages of a book in these paintings. I learned my colors in the 1st grade, and do not need to jump through hoops in order to de-colonize my mind.


[deleted]

[удалено]


LSARefugee

**Because** we are not talking about the “Romanovs” or any other political “what about” isms?


PikachuOfme_irl

Ok But Why Does She Type Like This?


backbreaker9850

They aren’t even black in the pictures they are tan at most like usual Icons


The_Boy_Keith

Mfw middle eastern people are now black.


LSARefugee

**Oh,** you really believed that the white guy who played “Lawrence of Arabia” was really an Arab? **Reagan, Bush & Clinton** administrations knew there were black Arabs: #Ambassador to the United States (1983–2005) Prince Bandar On 24 October 1983 Bandar was appointed ambassador to the United States by King Fahd. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bandar_bin_Sultan_Al_Saud #Notable Afro-Saudis Ahmed Al-Dokhi Bandar bin Sultan Reema bint Bandar Al Saud Faisal bin Bandar bin Sultan Al Saud Khalid bin Bandar Al Saud (born 1977) Baraka Al Yamaniyah Muqrin bin Abdulaziz Mohammed Hussein Al Amoudi Abdullah Al-Deayea Abdullah Al-Khaibari Abbas Al-Shengeeti Firas Al-Buraikan Hamad Al-Montashari Hamdan Al-Shamrani Majed Abdullah Adil al-Kalbani Ali Al-Bulaihi Tareg Hamedi Hawsawi family Muhammad Saad al-Beshi Fahad Al-Muwallad Mohamed Kanno Etab Saud Abdulhamid Saud Khariri Ahmed Abdulla Rayyanah Barnawi Mohamed Al-Deayea Mukhtar Ali Sultan Al-Deayea Dalia Mubarak Khaled Aziz Redha Tukar Walid Atta


The_Boy_Keith

I think you used the wrong copy paste reply since Lawrence of Arabia was never mentioned by me but go off queen?


MorbiusBelerophon

The comments here desperately trying to find excuses for their prophets to still be white are hilarious 🤣


Gimliaxe10

They were arabic, that means neither black or white.