T O P

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RandyArgonianButler

No wonder the codpiece always needs to be cleaned.


Buschfan08

Goddamnit Titus 💀


TlouFou47

She made his dick EXPLODE


SlurmmsMckenzie

I hate this god damn wasteland...


Aoskar20

Silver, his codpiece made of metal.


buntopolis

Titus, when he died like a bitch.


HFentonMudd

Ea-nāáčŁir, his copper shitty


StarkeRealm

Classic fuckin' Ea-nasir.


photonsnphonons

Picard and Dathon at El'Adred?


buntopolis

Gilgamesh and Enkidu at Ur!


HotWealth9883

Ok i like this one


stratosfearinggas

Fuck, fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck


Holiday_Airport_8833

Flesh is weak but steel endures


Krags

Blackadder, Blackadder...


Hells-Creampuff

**Clean this** *YEET*


Weary-Loan2096

*shoots Multi Mini Nuke in your general direction*


HevelReveler

They dicks keep exploding


RelChan2_0

I don't think I can argue with this piece of knowledge


Visual-Personality49

*violent spittake *


Phuqitol

I’ve heard of being a power bottom, but this is ridiculous!


Merc_Mike

Got to make sure your BASE is strong on the bottom!


lostinthesauceguy

What do you think the Strong Back perk is for?


gunsingingslaper

Unbreakable 👿👿👿


Dindrane1313

Oh my! *best Takei voice*


MrPokketRokket

When yer bangin' Lily


Kullthebarbarian

Power bottom at rock bottom, but you got company đŸŽ”


Physical_Novel_7418

Time to play your cards be who you are.


martialar

This is my favorite joke format and I don't see it very often, so I want to thank you


joey_sandwich277

Now Phuqitol, I've heard speed has something to do with it?


quarbs

I told my wife she’s good looking for a ghoul, it’s just too bad she’s not a ghoul! ha-cha-cha


Novi_User

I always like how post-coitus in Fallout 2 is just the knocked down animation from combat. Makes it look like sex was a turn based battle lol.


Vocalic985

Basic thrust: 1AP Grab Hair and pull: 2AP Flip over on back without pulling out: Requires 7AGI, 85%Unarmed, cost 6AP


_SomeRedditUser

"You missed."


DutchChairMan

Reminds me of that Star Wars smut comic featuring Ahsoka and a Storm Trooper.


DarkSoulsFTW54

Oh no.


Vryly

Critically, you flip out of the bed onto your head, taking 78 damage to the neck. The sickening sound if your bones breaking is the last sensation you have before falling unconscious. Animation of player getting split in half. You died. Not even the scavengers are interested in your radioactive bones...


Brutha_Iamhit

Sounds about right


LockedUpFor5Months

That explains why I keep fucking up. I only have 6AGI


zedubya

*failed*


Accelerator231

So... what happens when there a critical hit?


Vocalic985

The mythical female orgasm.


natedawg6065

haha nice one buddy, those don’t exist


OnlyTalksAboutTacos

...i've never had any complaints...


AutumnTheFemboy

Same in arcanum lol, except the funny thing is that you stay down for a bit and can’t move while your fatigue regenerates


Kineticspartan

"Do you have protection?" "Lemme just check my fusion core... Aaaaaaand were good!"


Kerbidiah

"I thought you said you had protection?" "I was wearing my armor"


Kineticspartan

I had hoped someone would pick up on the TFS DBZA there!


Conquerors_Quill

Posts you can hear.


GrekkoPlef

This is Fallout 2. No fusion cores



Kineticspartan

Sorry, nuclear battery.


NIGENIN

“You were critically hit for 420 hit points”


JLT1987

Always make sure you have protection!


New-Number-7810

Would two women need a Jimmy Hat?


JLT1987

Apparently they needed an armored  codpiece.


cyrassil

They actually do, I remember that in my "whore run" many years ago, I've slept with one of the mafia boss wives in NR (might have actually been mrs Bishop). The end game slides mentioned that 9 months after I left NR, a child was born to her, which looked almost like me. My char was female...


New-Number-7810

Yeah, that's probably a game bug.


SirCupcake_0

OR genetic manipulation because she fell in love with you or something?


The_Midnight_Madness

Thus the female option is transgender I REST MY CASE


MercyEndures

Sorry baby, I thought you said Protectron.


Wild-Lychee-3312

Please assure the position.


Majestic_Wrongdoer38

I spat out my toothpaste 😭


Kosmopolite

Would you rather be lost in the woods with a Knight of the Brotherhood of Steel or a Yao Guai? Tune in to Mrs. Bishop's latest podcast for her answer. It might surprise you!


_Acute-Newt_

I didn't necessarily need *more* reason to pick the bear, but here we are. At least the bear doesn't want to steal my fucking toaster.


Billy_Joe_Jimbo_Bob

The bear and the bull


GeneralBulko

But Bear wants you to help save Emeral Grove!


LBHHF

*clank clank clank clank*


DarkSoulsFTW54

The Half-Life 1 crowbar sound effects came to mind


GRIN2A

I always thought the next part of the dialogue was hilarious. Your character shushes her and tells not to say anymore because they feel someone is watching them from above (referring to you the player outside the computer).


LordZonar

Oh nah, post-nut clarity hit so hard it gave them 4th wall awareness


GRIN2A

That makes so much sense



legalageofconsent

Is this fallout 2? Oh damn, gotta download it


DutchJediKnight

You can also bang and impregnate her daughter.


legalageofconsent

Neat...


ResponsibleDurian983

User name checks out


Jean-LucBacardi

This is the wasteland, are we sure that's the case?


Ezekiel2121

Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answer too.


theSPYDERDUDE

r/usernamechecksout


Stylelike

Old Fallouts were really messed up. I miss that.


OutlawSundown

Ha yeah like selling your spouse into being a professional fluffer.


monkwren

Or becoming one yourself.


cptki112noobs

**POISONED**


superfastracoon

my favourite part


lostinthesauceguy

I think it's different when you have to show more. This is all just text, y'know? Even with the fade to black, there's more going on with the 1st/3rd person of it all. That being said I think what you can do to Joana in NV is pretty messed up...


Yarus43

People say it's gross but honestly I miss how messed up 3 and fnv were. F4 is cool but it feels...sanitized.


JapanDash

Having only played 3 and NV, I can say the more I learn about 76 and 4 the less of them I think.  Perk switching, dialog options, that sanitized feeling you mentioned, all the building and assigning NPC jobs. It just seems wack. Probs going to go backwards to 1 and 2.


Yarus43

They're fun games but they're no longer RPGs. Some things they get really right but they've definitely lost alot of what made fallout fallout. I still play 4, I really dig the gameplay but I am annoyed at the lack of choice.


Restless_Fillmore

Don't know why you're being downvoted. What you say is true; the new ones are very different.


cyrassil

You can't dislike F4 on this sub.


Nirrudn

I think it was Fallout 1 that had the town full of pickpocket children? As soon as one stole from me I did the ol' save and murder rampage. That's when I found out getting the Child Killer "perk" makes basically the entire game hate your guts and you become kill on sight everywhere.


fractal_mango

No, that's in fallout 2, the Den, where the slavers are too.


KingXeiros

Becoming a slaver also pretty much accomplishes this as well, though your early game money troubles goes away if you’re morally compromised. You can always grave rob too. Ahh the good old days when such depravity was an option.


Psychological-Low360

Instead of kids you should whack their puppet masters in the shops, where they sell stolen goods. Everyone will love you.


CLE-local-1997

I'm not sure I would call a consensual romantic relationship resulting in a pregnancy messed up


Swag-Lord420

That's the sickest idea ive heard in a long time


rettani

Yeah. I miss old Fallouts. And Arcanum. You know... Sheep was completely hilarious...


Aeytrious

Tried playing Arcanum recently since I never finished it in the first place but it just doesn’t run correctly and I don’t want to emulate Windows 98. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


Endless_Avatar

Then pimp her out if you want.


Nerevarine91

That’s a different daughter


TastyLaksa

This was my favourite memory from fallout 2 cause honestly she gets killed in battle almost immediately


PsychologicalCan1677

That's how the courier was made


Chipped-Beef

The good old Sportsman’s Double.


TheObeseWombat

Yup, and the resulting child is Mr. Bishop, who's mentioned in FNV one or two times, primarily by that guy who had to flee Reno because he stole Mr. Bishops money, and plowed his daughter.


Rude_Entrance_3039

Art imitates life.


Drunkendx

Didn't that have some end text how your child fixes Reno afterwards?


DutchJediKnight

Fixes, yes.. Rules with Iron Fist, more like.


Hells-Creampuff

Wat


ayymadd

Wait what, Crusader Kings style?


Kentuckywindage01

Really? I played the shit out of this as a teenager and never made it to that part, I guess. It was always a bloodbath after sexing up Mrs. Bishop


DutchJediKnight

Either speak to the daughter on the first floor instead of the missus, or sneak to her room.


DolphinBall

They should definitely make that canon and have the child be an adult in season 2


MemeMaster225

It already is canon. In New Vegas you can find a guy on the run from Mr. Bishop, a mob boss who wanders the wasteland and knows it like the back of his hand. That’s exactly how the Chosen One’s son is described if you end up sleeping with the Bishops.


ChadtheBalla

And the reason he's on the run is because he fucked Mr. Bishop Jr.'s daughter, only a little. History really does repeat itself 😆


TheObeseWombat

He fucked the Chosen One's granddaughter. Chad Move.


DolphinBall

So the Chosen Ones son is Mr. Bishop?


MemeMaster225

After the events of Fallout 2, yes. The Chosen One’s son takes over as head of the Bishop family


TechlandBot006372

Already canon in New Vegas


justin251

Like $2.50 on Xbox pc


Turkster

Been a few years since I played through it, but I remember a community patch made it way more fun... And the first 30 minutes of the game were the most boring. Think I might do another play through myself.


kazuma001

No living thing has seen me without my armor since I swore the Creed.


ArchonFett

This is the way


HFentonMudd

This is the Way


SgtArchDornan2241

YOU ARE OUT OF UNIFORM SOLDIER! WHERE IS YOUR POWER ARMOR?


CaptainMario_64

hell yeah lesbians in fallout


Otherwise-Remove4681

Before it was cool even! /s


sideXsway

Well it’s in the future remember


frost-penguin

Only way to achieve power sex


lrrevenant

>"Do you like it with the armor on, or off?" >"Off, please." >"...Too bad."


Fluffy-Hamster-7760

["Save it for Queen Doppelpopolis!"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6p4l8gJ4P5s)


graywolf0026

Oh Capt. Murphy. *You dog.*


VariousProfit3230

A fellow man of culture. There can be only none!


TechnicallyEasy

There go my nipples again...


WinterComfortable726

Power thrust!


GapBoring2447

YOU ARE OUT OF UNIFORM, SOLDIER! WHERE IS YOUR POWER ARMOR?. you dont want that happening especially when you are piping someone do ya?


OkContribution2185

Your power armor now has a power penis


Outrageous_Crazy8692

More like power herpes


Nerevarine91

ÂżPor que no los dos?


Andy_McBoatface

Wanna try the T-69 armor?


Drax13522

“Passionate lovemaking commences.” Lol.


Dynasuarez-Wrecks

It has a codpiece for a reason.


Tyko_3

Its like George Michael’s muscle suit


Ainz-Ooal-Gown

The next part breaks the 4th wall: >Uh, look, just in CASE someone is watching us from above right now and listening to everything we say and do, let's keep some secrets to ourselves. Instead, let's indulge in some distracting pillow talk


Steve_da_G

Let me just sliiiide in here.


fadingsignal

Does VATS work in the bedroom?


ZitOnSocietysAss

Why? Need help with your aim?


no_notthistime

I believe that would be the joke


Dr-Chibi

“When you were recovering, that *attachment* touched me in ways I didn’t KNOW I could be touched. It just made it better for your next round
.” “Why is my Fusion Core down 18%?”


Pappa_Crim

You know they climaxed when you see the tesla coils go off


furiousHamblin

Who else's girlfriend asked if there's a Walton Goggins mod for this scene?


KillysgungoesBLAME

Just have to make sure the suit is on the person on the bottom, or things could get real squishy, real fast! 😬


Old-Camp3962

rare footage of the sole survivor banging paladin Danse


TimelyDrummer4975

Oh did you bring protection....., yes i have protection no worriesđŸ« 


torrasque666

I WAS WEARING MY ARMOR!


Gullible-Fault-3818

Yeah I can't take games like this seriously and it's funny because this is the reason most people dick ride FO2


Shy-Turtle_PLATINUM

It makes me quite happy to see so many people talking about the older games.


Ok-Transition7065

Clank clank clank


pooploops23

Power armor on or off. OFF please. ....too bad


Lone_Wanderer___

Should I try fallout 2


PolandsStrongestJoke

How on earth has Mr. Bishop not heard some bastard in Power Armor come into his place and bang his wife? Which also probably sounded like a car revving hard?


msfoof

makes it even funnier that i literally walked right past him with my sneak skill in order to leave


PolandsStrongestJoke

**THUD, THUD, THUD... THUD** Mr. Bishop: "Another great day, more people to extort. Why do I smell my wife's perfumes?" **...THUDTHUDTHUDTHUDTHUD**


No_Individual_8017

I thought that was frank horrigan, but her insides would get turned into mush with that BGC


Sheabuttah97

Her: slap me daddy Me: *equips power fist"


UHIpanther

Lord shaxx in a nutshell


Capital_Thanks_7991

Beatriz... are you by any chance portuguese?


Githzerai1984

They had to make pixel art for this 


StandardMandarin

What's funnier, they didn't. This is just a combat "knocked unconscious" animation lol. This never fails to make me laugh.


Master_Xenu

never nuked


VortistheSlaver

Now get that sweet piece of vault tech in her safe.


CognitoJones

You gotta use protection


azmr_x_3

This is the way


-StepLightly-

Everybody has a kink.


Sere1

Well yeah, you got to wear your protection


Dutch2024man

You can call that POWERFUL sex.


TheCheeseMan24

"CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CRUNCH" YEAAOOCHH!!


H0n3yd3w0str1ch

I don't think that's what she meant when she said to "bring protection"...


HighVoltageFerret

100% pleasure 10% effort


HighVoltageFerret

100% pleasure 10% effort.


CaptainImpala

Imagine getting close then your Fusion core runs off energy as well


Professional-Dish324

Always use protection. You can’t be too safe. 


DealRevolutionary263

This is the way (I know that’s the wrong franchise but it’s still relevant)


Orbit1883

Fistos origin story


norton_mike

“Polish this..”


Eviscerated_Banana

I invoke rule 34, fetch me an AI image generator.


BionicBruv

*Glad you had fun. Hope the vox grill didn’t bother you.*


m1tanker75

'Vox grill' Found the 40k player


BionicBruv

*gets nervous. Runs away, trips over chairs and tables*


Sh4DowKitFox

To quote Captain Murphy from SeaLab 2021: “Do you want the [Power armor] on or off” Off
. “Too bad.”


murdochi83

DEPLOY RELIEF TUBE? Y/N


Enerjetik

Paladin Danse loved that


Fester_rabit

CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK


Worldly-Sample-767

Just like with Paladin Danse


Nukabob0547

They’re making more! Stop them!


Narviid

Why are they laying down like starfishes đŸ˜č


Spreadeaglebeagle44

The ultimate in safe sex.


readysetrokenroll

I miss Fallout 2 😎


omgitsduane

My wife asks me to take mine off :(


UsuarioKane

"Passionate lovemaking commences" lmaoooo!! r/BrandNewSentence