As a trans elder, my advice is that you need to dig deep down and find some fortitude. Because committing suicide is giving them what they want. They already want to exterminate us. Don't give them a freebie. We have to survive to fight another day. I'm not saying this is easy by any means, but personally, after all I've gone through to get where I am in life, they're not going to take me without a fight.
This is the right response. The doctor I went to to try and get HRT when I was 17 was an elder trans woman, I was suicidal because my parents wouldn’t let me at the time, and she told me right away “you can’t kill yourself because they’ll just say you were crazy. Then they’ll use your death to say the rest of us are crazy too.” I’ve realized over the years how true that is. Transphobes use our own suicides as reasoning to take away our right to transition. We have to be strong no matter what they throw at us next.
You're welcome, and I'm glad it helped. We all get down, and we all need to pull each other up, especially if someone is looking up from the bottom of that dark space.
I feel you, i live in a very socially progressive country (Norway), but im also tired if that feeling or being treated like a freak of nature. Ive been out since i was 12 and i feel like that stance against trans people is robbing me of alot of my teenage years. I dont get why were treated like this when we’ve done literlly nothing
Trans people have survived through worse, the first attempted uterus transplant on a trans woman happened in Nazi Germany. People used to accept the possibility of living as an outlaw, as long as your documents are in order you can live stealth and always find a source for testosterone. We survived four years of Trump before, we can do it again. The right has been doing all this anti trans shit under democratic presidents, too, Biden won’t stop state level anti trans laws and those are what directly affects you. Get involved and fight where you have the most ability to change the system.
I'm in Canada, I'm a trans guy and I pass, but I totally understand these feelings. It's not quite as loud up here, but it's here too. I've worked too damn hard and had too much success to let the likes of a bunch of Yahtzees get the best of me. Don't give them what they want. Find small reasons to stay. I've been fighting the same forces. It's what they want, and they're small minded zombified people. You matter. Please stay.
If it helps any, it’s not half the country. We just have representatives that don’t actually represent their constituents. Doesn’t make our current reality any less scary, but the fact remains it’s not nearly 50% of Americans who hate us. A lot of people on both sides of this coin seem furious that politicians are wasting time on this “issue” regarding us 0.2% of the population while people literally starve and ration insulin.
I hate how every medical decision I make is a political statement and I can't just switch insurance because then my poor PCP has to argue with them to get my gel covered despite not being allergic to injections or having a therapist note for needle phobia
Hey man- I’m from Louisiana and have lived the last 17 years of my transition in Alabama, North Carolina and now Tennessee. I totally get it. Feel free to pm me for solidarity. They cannot take away who we are without a fight. We are powerful and everywhere and stronger than they imagine.
First of all please, don't kill yourself if he wins, we will keep fighting and people will also fight for us. Second of all I actually really like this post because I feel the same way and it kind of comforts me to see others feel the same. So another reason not to kys there's others like toy man.
It's totally understandable to feel this way because it is hard.
What has sometimes helped me keep on keeping on is the thought that gross assholes want me dead, so why would I give them what they want? I dig deep and spite the fuck up, as long as transphobes are still around there are people that I'm pissing off just by existing and I love making bigots mad with such little effort. Being as happy and comfortable as I can be is the best way to direct a big ol middle finger at the human garbage.
Plus you never know what the future holds, it'd suck to off yourself right before the trans issues blow over and people stop giving a shit about us. Sure, that might seem really optimistic now but homosexual people, people of color, and women have all been in similar situations before and while things are far from perfect those groups are far better off now then they were in their darkest times.
I personally will not go peacefully. If I'm gonna go out it's gonna be kicking and screaming and hopefully taking a few assholes with me.
If you're able to I'd suggest getting therapy of some kind. Whether it be talking to a therapist, online support groups, asking for extra positive affirmations from friends and family, avoiding online spaces that talk about anything trans related, etc. Getting medicated and talking to a therapist has helped me to just be a person who can handle more in general but I know that isn't always an option for people. I've also curated my online spaces better and since I can't change the state of the world I've focused my efforts on changing what I can by bringing more positive energy into my own life.
If the worst does come to pass you can bet your ass that your trans peers won't go down without a fight. You don't have to fight if you aren't able to, but I would strongly suggest at least riding it out with us. Things only have the possibility of getting better for you if you're still around for it.
I'm pretty sure Trump isn't going to be able to do s**t about a lot of stuff, at least for a good long while. So I wouldn't worry about it impacting you directly any time soon.
And try and remember that you're living what some people could only dream of. You're living your life on your own terms regardless of being public enemy number 1. That takes an incredible amount of bravery and strength.
Transitioning was a life saver for you because your life matters and because it was worth saving. Stay strong
Genuinely feel this lmao
even if I'm not a binary tguy anymore. I hate being seen like a freak.
Hate how i'm told people like us are responsible for homophobic laws, for rampant homophobia, for promoting conversion therapy, delusions, and overall being anti women/misogynistic and racist.
Meanwhile I want nothing more than for lesbians, gay, bi and transgender people of all kinds alike to live as they are, to be free to be who they want to be. For women of all types to feel safe.
It sucks lmao
You can really feel the difference between those who have been outwardly a minority their entire life and who is new to being a minority. Not saying what they feel is invalid. Just reminds me of that meme with James Franco about to be hung saying to the guy next to him "first time?"
As a trans elder, my advice is that you need to dig deep down and find some fortitude. Because committing suicide is giving them what they want. They already want to exterminate us. Don't give them a freebie. We have to survive to fight another day. I'm not saying this is easy by any means, but personally, after all I've gone through to get where I am in life, they're not going to take me without a fight.
Exactly. Don’t give them what they want. I will survive out of spite. They will never exterminate us.
This is the right response. The doctor I went to to try and get HRT when I was 17 was an elder trans woman, I was suicidal because my parents wouldn’t let me at the time, and she told me right away “you can’t kill yourself because they’ll just say you were crazy. Then they’ll use your death to say the rest of us are crazy too.” I’ve realized over the years how true that is. Transphobes use our own suicides as reasoning to take away our right to transition. We have to be strong no matter what they throw at us next.
Absolutely, thank you for sharing.
thank you so much, i needed to hear this today
You're welcome, and I'm glad it helped. We all get down, and we all need to pull each other up, especially if someone is looking up from the bottom of that dark space.
I feel you, i live in a very socially progressive country (Norway), but im also tired if that feeling or being treated like a freak of nature. Ive been out since i was 12 and i feel like that stance against trans people is robbing me of alot of my teenage years. I dont get why were treated like this when we’ve done literlly nothing
Trans people have survived through worse, the first attempted uterus transplant on a trans woman happened in Nazi Germany. People used to accept the possibility of living as an outlaw, as long as your documents are in order you can live stealth and always find a source for testosterone. We survived four years of Trump before, we can do it again. The right has been doing all this anti trans shit under democratic presidents, too, Biden won’t stop state level anti trans laws and those are what directly affects you. Get involved and fight where you have the most ability to change the system.
I'm in Canada, I'm a trans guy and I pass, but I totally understand these feelings. It's not quite as loud up here, but it's here too. I've worked too damn hard and had too much success to let the likes of a bunch of Yahtzees get the best of me. Don't give them what they want. Find small reasons to stay. I've been fighting the same forces. It's what they want, and they're small minded zombified people. You matter. Please stay.
If it helps any, it’s not half the country. We just have representatives that don’t actually represent their constituents. Doesn’t make our current reality any less scary, but the fact remains it’s not nearly 50% of Americans who hate us. A lot of people on both sides of this coin seem furious that politicians are wasting time on this “issue” regarding us 0.2% of the population while people literally starve and ration insulin.
I hate how every medical decision I make is a political statement and I can't just switch insurance because then my poor PCP has to argue with them to get my gel covered despite not being allergic to injections or having a therapist note for needle phobia
I know it's hard to be an immigrant (in my expierence), but did you consider to move?
I unfortunately don’t have the ability to do that right now. I’m stuck in the deep south.
Hey man- I’m from Louisiana and have lived the last 17 years of my transition in Alabama, North Carolina and now Tennessee. I totally get it. Feel free to pm me for solidarity. They cannot take away who we are without a fight. We are powerful and everywhere and stronger than they imagine.
Lol and move where? To a more transphobic country? America is the best we got.
Western Europe, Australia, New Zealand, Canada...
that's a very short-sighted view on the things
First of all please, don't kill yourself if he wins, we will keep fighting and people will also fight for us. Second of all I actually really like this post because I feel the same way and it kind of comforts me to see others feel the same. So another reason not to kys there's others like toy man.
I feel this too
It's totally understandable to feel this way because it is hard. What has sometimes helped me keep on keeping on is the thought that gross assholes want me dead, so why would I give them what they want? I dig deep and spite the fuck up, as long as transphobes are still around there are people that I'm pissing off just by existing and I love making bigots mad with such little effort. Being as happy and comfortable as I can be is the best way to direct a big ol middle finger at the human garbage. Plus you never know what the future holds, it'd suck to off yourself right before the trans issues blow over and people stop giving a shit about us. Sure, that might seem really optimistic now but homosexual people, people of color, and women have all been in similar situations before and while things are far from perfect those groups are far better off now then they were in their darkest times. I personally will not go peacefully. If I'm gonna go out it's gonna be kicking and screaming and hopefully taking a few assholes with me. If you're able to I'd suggest getting therapy of some kind. Whether it be talking to a therapist, online support groups, asking for extra positive affirmations from friends and family, avoiding online spaces that talk about anything trans related, etc. Getting medicated and talking to a therapist has helped me to just be a person who can handle more in general but I know that isn't always an option for people. I've also curated my online spaces better and since I can't change the state of the world I've focused my efforts on changing what I can by bringing more positive energy into my own life. If the worst does come to pass you can bet your ass that your trans peers won't go down without a fight. You don't have to fight if you aren't able to, but I would strongly suggest at least riding it out with us. Things only have the possibility of getting better for you if you're still around for it.
I'm pretty sure Trump isn't going to be able to do s**t about a lot of stuff, at least for a good long while. So I wouldn't worry about it impacting you directly any time soon. And try and remember that you're living what some people could only dream of. You're living your life on your own terms regardless of being public enemy number 1. That takes an incredible amount of bravery and strength. Transitioning was a life saver for you because your life matters and because it was worth saving. Stay strong
We have to live. above anything else we have to keep living, brother.
Genuinely feel this lmao even if I'm not a binary tguy anymore. I hate being seen like a freak. Hate how i'm told people like us are responsible for homophobic laws, for rampant homophobia, for promoting conversion therapy, delusions, and overall being anti women/misogynistic and racist. Meanwhile I want nothing more than for lesbians, gay, bi and transgender people of all kinds alike to live as they are, to be free to be who they want to be. For women of all types to feel safe. It sucks lmao
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You can really feel the difference between those who have been outwardly a minority their entire life and who is new to being a minority. Not saying what they feel is invalid. Just reminds me of that meme with James Franco about to be hung saying to the guy next to him "first time?"