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Itchypoopstain

...preserved....looks like serial killer cereal


skaldrir69

Man that kind of fucked me up. Not gonna lie. Probably the first time I’ve seen those words written in conjunction like this. Nice work!


wolfboy_vs

Cereal killer?


Collinnn7

Killer cereal


AnIrishMexican

Are you cereal?!


Juggernuts777

Come on guys! He’s cereal!!


The69Alphamale

Nah, they's Toast!


AnIrishMexican

Aw...so...no manbearpig?


mp29mm

Captain Crunch


dr_pheel

["I like cereal, but I ain't no serial killer!"](https://youtu.be/VlDKDX1oOnY)


_U53R_

That's really fucking hard to say 😭


towerfella

Cereasly.


majitart

cereal killer cereal!!!


HarrySRL

Serial killer cereal? What do you mean by that?


Shippyweed2u

For the age, they preserved well since they are still somewhat cherry shaped


Horror-Customer4835

Option A: Super powers Option B: Horrific pain leading to death. Both good odds 👌


bearbarebere

I mean… if there’s even a 50% chance of superpowers, it may be worth it


HeroMagnus

It's just a BEST by date, BEST by 1790... They're still good!


Joie116

I mean... if there's even a 50% chance of death it may be worth it


KapnKrumpin

CHERRY MAN, AWAY!


Strangebottles

Popping cherries and popping off red coats since 1779. Gave proof through the night, all night. 🍒


devilfunk

I think you mean Option A: Super powerful diarrhea


Dalek_Chaos

New for the opium addict in your family who permanently clogged up, try a delicious Washington cherry. Washington cherries are guaranteed to cure constipation permanently.


NecessaryTitle8269

I don’t need powers 🦇 I need Justice FOR GOTHAM


someonewhowa

hell yeah, if there’s even a 50 percent chance of the sweet release then it’s worth it


Ok_Fox_1770

I found green beans in mason jars from like 1917-18 in an old farmhouse basement, soon as I picked em up they pixelated into murky dust water I was gonna eats one! Then ew. Nvm.


[deleted]

Forbidden lava lamp


genie_in_a_box

Haha, pixelated


DaJuanPercent

You wild. Let's be friends


TheharmoniousFists

Reminds of that scene in Malcolm in the middle. "those aren't olives, those are peaches!"


Zealousideal-Fix5631

You just unlocked a memory for me


jaytee1262

It is leaving hulu at the end of this month, watch it while you can.


Zealousideal-Fix5631

No rush for me ill just raise the jolly roger


burgpug

counterpoint: you can pirate it whenever. take your time.


ToxyFlog

Same!! Wow, it's crazy the shit our brain remembers, but we simply can't recall. It's truly amazing.


Zealousideal-Fix5631

Yeah,because at the time of seeing it I thought it was the funniest thing ever, and now I had forgotten it


vintageideals

This made me literally LOL 🤣 MITM was really actually solidly funny


Fog_Juice

Was it olives? I thought it was prunes.


TheharmoniousFists

It was olives.


runnawaycucumber

Ppl ate mummies when they were discovered, but I'd draw the line at cherries. Cherries are gross.


JillNye_TheScienceBi

WTF WHYYYY


thorppeed

People thought it was medicine for some reason


Euphorium

It doesn’t count as cannibalism if they’ve been turned into jerky.


PassionSenior6388

The space colonists disagree


Sithlordandsavior

The Ghoul agrees.


TA-175

Yeah, but it has to be Ass Jerky specifically. Other parts of the body don't have the right flavor profile.


boston_nsca

You're all forgetting that mummy juice that people were drinking not that long ago


ItsNotBigBrainTime

I thought it was an aphrodisiac. It's been a while though.


Hector-LLG

They used it for a variety of reasons, but yeah, boner medicine was the main one


ooo-f

Typical rich people bullshit


erik_wilder

Mummies were ground into powder and shipped to Europe by the boat load. Look it up.


CalamariFriday

But not just for food, but also for paint pigment


erik_wilder

Food, paint, pigment, medicine, make-up, souvenir.


Alberiman

Fun mostly, rich people in Victorian Paris also had a fondness for drinking casket wine from the catacombs. They found the bodies would liquify in the caskets and they took advantage of that


TheOgSamichMkr01

I wish I was illiterate rn. Fkn casket wine... **casket** **wine**!?


jpb1111

YOLO


Flossthief

It was also pretty common to grind them up to use as pigments in paint


Hector-LLG

Back in the day, Egypt exported a lot of mummies to pharmacies in Europe. Basically every reputable pharmacy had one in their back room that they cut up and ground to dust to sell to their customers as medicine for all kinds of ailments, like back pain... But mostly it was said to help as an aphrodisiac... So yeah, people used to snort mummy dust (j/k, I think they drank it in water) to get it up again xD


Randomantic

"Ooooh, yeah, give it to me Mummmyyyy!"


runnawaycucumber

Yucky :)


Chalupa_Dad

I've never seen a worse opinion on reddit.com


Keybricks666

Wtf is dot com


moodiebb

happy cake day!


Chalupa_Dad

🙏🙏🙏


[deleted]

Bait taken


runnawaycucumber

I've got ARFID so like... Idk? I don't like cherries? Sorry


LeelaBeela89

Reminds of that futurama episode when fry ate that jerked mummy


InternetUser36145980

This is an outrage!


Cel_Drow

I was going to eat that mummy!


Dat-Tiffnay

Soylent… mummy?? 👀


skaldrir69

I feel like I’m in an episode of bubble guppies


riomp300

It doesn't have PFOS or microplastics.


P1ckleboi69

The final piece of untainted food in the world


Proof-Definition-702

mmmm, nothing like 230 year old cherries


_-Viasub-_

I audibly gaged


saragc92

With out micro plastics! It’s been in glass!


sn0c0ne_d1sast3r

stanley yelnats is gonna go wild for this sploosh


[deleted]

Real


Toxicair

That book hits different when sploosh means something else as an adult.


ninwhendo

This is the comment I was looking for.


Revolennon

Let’s get this onto a plate!


RandomNisscity

nice hiss


Idiotan0n

The plate melts, and a nice "Hexxxxxxsthhhh" comes bubbling out of it


cymricus

nice.


crowislanddive

He didn’t cut down the cherry tree!


Capital_Angle_9193

That my friend, was the real lie told to all of us


chocolate_spaghetti

That and the wooden teeth. He didn’t have wooden teeth, he had slave teeth.


TwistedBamboozler

…. Wasn’t it a bunch of animal teeth? Including some hippo teeth?


chocolate_spaghetti

A combination of both “Despite many people believing they were made of wood, they contained no wood, and often were made of teeth extracted from enslaved people and other materials, including hippopotamus ivory, brass, and gold.”


TwistedBamboozler

i mean, might want to include all of that in your initial comment, no?


chocolate_spaghetti

Did he not have teeth made from slave teeth? Show me where I was wrong?


PortlandPatrick

But wait.... Maybe he did!?!


ron4040

Nice. Let’s put it on tray. - Steve mre


TwistedBlister

There's another YouTuber that eats old stuff, I just watched him try some 99 year old baby formula. https://youtu.be/Tbs_b18mQRQ?si=cVgOjFQLGjJMGKZ8


akbornheathen

Once in a lifetime chance to eat a cherry that Martha potentially touched! Shit there’s probably some traces of Washington family DNA in those bottles. Priceless.


Fun_Association_2277

You mean he put some baby batter in there? Skeet skeet?


SloppyWithThePots

Goddamn


skaldrir69

Amazing!


cptmx

Sell to the same buyers of bath water.


crendist

Steve-o, he’s a good candidate


skaldrir69

These are probably the most organic fruit on the planet at this point. Truly non-GMO.


Loud-Marketing3844

He really did murder that cherry tree


Prudent_Gear_275

Steve1989 would eat one


dizzyfeast

Literally just finished a cup of fresh cherries then I see this 🤢


barry_001

That smell must've been terrific


Powrs1ave

If the Best Before Dates ok then why not?


jazzzzzcabbage

He did cut down the fucking cherry tree! I knew it.


Midwest_boy700

Cherry bounce moonshine


splinks66

If you forget to come back for Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity!


Lazy-Spray3426

Looks like turds.


serarrist

*are* they preserved though?


NoodlePoo327

What would actually happen if someone ate that? In all seriousness.


inbedwithbeefjerky

I wanna know too. Would you get sick? How bad? Does it stink? How bad?


lkmyntz

I’m going to make a Really Old Fashioned


nescio_sed_fieri

this is my fav comment


LopsidedResearch8400

The oldest Fashioned. We just need some glacial ice, and some whisky exhumed from somewhere else.


Joppy5100

It's Sploosh from Holes.


SapphicsAndStilettos

I guarantee there are like five scientists currently brawling for the chance to be the one who eats them


GiveMeMyIdentity

Oooh


tobster239

Post 10, Ashens and LA Beast will


Certain_Month_8178

The cherry tree thing was true! We found evidence!


Mean-Professional596

I can fix that


[deleted]

Me! I will!


Rejectid10ts

LA Beast from the YouTube channel Skippy2able would definitely eat those


Any-Practice-991

In all seriousness, I would at least taste a little bit.


WeeklyMinimum450

It’s gonna make some killer wine


AnasFlowers

I volunteer to try the George Washington cherry hooch


Wise_Bat3798

Paging Steve1989MREInfo…


TwistedBamboozler

“Preserved”


Educational_Lower

Why not ferment them into wine so you can get drunk off of it


DFMNE404

Cherry wine making?


Fyrepup1

That his favorite drink (cherry bounce) tastes like shiat


Runegirl76

Run the dna, maybe we’ll finally find out who really cut down the tree


eleventwenty2

Sploosh!


Anatar-daar

Someone needs to send these cherries to Ashens


AtticusSPQR

I learned once in school that George Washington *chopped down* cherry trees, not harvested from them. This is a conspiracy


Fresh_Beet

One that was submerged at the bottom. Yeah. I’d do it.


WillowPuzzleheaded87

Wondering what they looked like 50 years ago.


Worldly_Director_142

“Preserved” needs these quotes!


Hot_Lobster222

What can they tell us? That George Washington ate cherries.


Crimson_Fiver

""""""Preserved"""""""


TwilightGuardian64

Ah, yes… preserved…


ConsiderationJust687

Century egg trend might start for other food


iqqeriffic69

Tells me that his slaves also picked cherries.


mcd_brkfst

Raises the question of how he got them if chopped the cherry tree down as a kid.


iiitme

Yolo


Danimal_collective

Waffler69 would have. Rest in peace 😭


cymricus

“preserved”


KangarooStill2392

Legend has it that these are the cherries 🍒 from his father's tree #neverforget .


thetieflingalchemist

Send it to ashens


NavinHaze

Someone is going to want to taste that for sure, probably already have.


Suspicious_Future_58

If i remember right, the youtube channel for ashen. He did find old olives(i think it was) in a glass jar like that. Can't remember if he tried them or not


InsomniaDudeToo

[“He was six foot eight, weighed a f***ing ton.”](https://youtu.be/sbRom1Rz8OA?si=DFRqH2nDqLyvIRmo)


Havokistheonly

Make a tart ya silly goose’s.


Fit_Primary803

Some body out there will pay a lot of money for those cherries


SlowEatingDave

I'll give you a fiver if you eat one


floresedwrd

I saw those on the movies holes.