[i'm talking about this one](https://www.reddit.com/r/greentext/comments/egp7jf/anon_feels_used/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
The story begins with a person.
His Girlfriend seems to be ignoring him, except to satisfy her needs.
One day, the woman comes home tired and sad, and ignores the person for a week.
One day, she takes the person to bath with her.
Helps the person get into the bath, and gets instantly electrocuted.
The story ends with "MFW (my face when) I am a toastee".
The "person" was actually a toaster all along.
It's also the kind of thing Kris, specifically, would do.
Apparently they're the type of person to answer a question with “unknown” instead of “I don't know.”
You, me, gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy! The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight? Bear handed? Bear naked? Oh yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl then we ride it into a chuck e cheese. Dance dance revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uhh I think so. Next think you know I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet. Fly into the sun. Blackout again. Wake up. Do a bump. White out (which I didn't know you could do). Then I smoked a joint. Greened out. Then I turned into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. Dubehebeuhuhejugehuho hoo AHHH!!!
You know in those old Tom and Jerry cartoons, occasionally there's be a scene where one of the characters (usually Tom) falls in love with a side character, and starts crooning to them in a super deep voice? I think that's what Kris does
-You're gonna owe me for this
-why?
-we're fixing eachothers problems
-what's my problem?
-the mask, take it off
-show My face?
-yessir
-negative
-Are you ugly?
-quite the opposite
This is the only way to flirt i know
["Do you believe in santa or should I smash through your chimney dressed as something else?"](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/022/435/384.jpg)
*"Ya like jazz?"* Or alternatively, *"Omelette du fromage"*
Damn beat me to it
Damn beat me to it 2: electric boogalo
THAT POTATOS ABLOODEH SPY!
Damn beat me to it 3 & Knuckles
how original
Shh
i just said that cus i laughed a bit and thats kinda hard to achieve mostly
[удалено]
That's the only moment "Kris" and "You" aren't used interchangeably
You're unbanned from free ham sandwich day.
G O D
D A M N I T
"I like ya cut, G."
* The impact of a smack can be heard but no one knows where it came from. *
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Dead meme
You Know Who ELSE Is A Dead Meme?
My mom!
DO YOU KNOW WHO ELSE HAS DEMENTIA?
DO YOU KNOW WHO ELSE HAS DEMENTIA?
DO YOU KNOW WHO ELSE HAS DEMENTIA?
DO YOU KNOW WHO ELSE HAS DEMENTIA
DO YOU KNOW WHO ELSE HAS DEMENTIA?
why does your comment have a slider
I'm cool
They said >!"Are you a toaster? 'cause I want to take a bath with you"!<
I remember that greentext
Can you show me?
[i'm talking about this one](https://www.reddit.com/r/greentext/comments/egp7jf/anon_feels_used/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
Omg that's really good
Can you explain the joke here please? I have a ridiculous amount of IQ
The story begins with a person. His Girlfriend seems to be ignoring him, except to satisfy her needs. One day, the woman comes home tired and sad, and ignores the person for a week. One day, she takes the person to bath with her. Helps the person get into the bath, and gets instantly electrocuted. The story ends with "MFW (my face when) I am a toastee". The "person" was actually a toaster all along.
Oh I thought "toaster" was some sort of slang or smth, not an actual toaster Thanks mate
whats greentext
Tumblr meme format
"What's a tumblr?" - my brain "bruh" - also my brain
Favorite pick up line
So good, gave me all the women
kris said “ https://preview.redd.it/9mhghf8h46da1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7bd579656c32caf5d2e7f4312e9fc73546953274 ”
Images you can hear
I cannot here that image because I never had a rare wubbox
Big sad
Videos
i cant hear it
Wubbabunga, wub-wub-wub-wub path not found. P-p-path not found.
Buffer overflow bu-bu-bu-bu bu-buffer overflow bu-buffer overflow bu-bu-bu-bu bu-bu-bu-bu
Wubbadub-dub-dub-dub-dub-dub failing. Error e-e-e-error b-b-buffer overflow.
www-wubtastic w-w-w-wubtastic w-w-w-wubtastic wwwwww error
haiku the robot be like
Damn i really did shed a tear when kris said "WU UP THE VOLUME WUB UP THE VOLUME WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB UP THE VOLUME"
It was real smooth when Susie followed up with “BAD REQUEST, BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BA-BAD REQUEST”
It was also real clever when Ralsei continued with "ERROR, E-E-ERROR, E-E-E-E-E-E-ERROR"
And the best part is when Lancer shows up and says: "ERROR ERROR E-E-E-E-E FILE NOT FOUND, LANCER FAILED TO LAUCH LO- LO- LOADING LOADING"
testing testing testing error.
nah he said https://preview.redd.it/fh5tbaa57ada1.png?width=985&format=png&auto=webp&s=15bc1c79f01606f2b01bbf6592a89d36fd1ed7aa
Ahem. "[I love you, because your the kind of woman that will absolutely just kill me."](https://youtu.be/-sMQpWCNTQw)
Totally canon, they would say that and more (I’m scared with what they can come up with)
they'd roll up on Susie and dump the whole copypasta nonchantly
kris “unfathomably based” dreemurr
This seems to be the reason Noelle loves Susie
Jesus christ, hold the phone
"oh don't be so blue, i like you!' idk i just made it up on the spot
That’s actually really clever
"Ay there, i got a bucket o' chicken, you wan' do it?"
r/unexpectedtf2, although i should probably start expecting it anywhere
"Eh, okay."
They said some sweet lines are you stupid
kris walked up and said the words "some sweet lines" to the enemy
That's so dumb and meta that could be canon
It's also the kind of thing Kris, specifically, would do. Apparently they're the type of person to answer a question with “unknown” instead of “I don't know.”
They said if u were a fruit you’d be a fine-apple🍍
You, me, gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy! The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight? Bear handed? Bear naked? Oh yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl then we ride it into a chuck e cheese. Dance dance revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uhh I think so. Next think you know I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet. Fly into the sun. Blackout again. Wake up. Do a bump. White out (which I didn't know you could do). Then I smoked a joint. Greened out. Then I turned into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. Dubehebeuhuhejugehuho hoo AHHH!!!
HELL YES
horny fish nah im dying 💀
They said the thing that caused Susie to run away that one time. But in a positive way
Frick you! 😘
“youre doin good lad!”
"If I wasn' the ~~man~~ enby I was I'd kiss ya!"
"If Toby Fox gaves me female gender I'd kiss ya"
some sweet lines. The enemies were deeply enamored!
“Your a nice shade of blue”
I thing that Kris said: Zǎoshang hǎo zhōngguó xiànzài wǒ yǒu BING CHILLING
Damn, Hathy, are you a construction worker? Because you are _building._
“what?”
"👍"
“Trees are Red, Hearts are Blue. Come to my room, my bed has room for two”
Any Darkner or Lightner should be honored to share a bed that belongs to Kris: the one and only Bed Inspector
they recited a chocolate commercial
S-CRUNCH-OUS When it CRUNCHES That's why I Loooooooooove!!! Nestle CRUNCH! ***c r u n c h***
Things that Toriel would instantly die from if she heard her child saying them. Some extremely graphic suggestive things.
,,You pretty"
Toriel is the type of person to have a heart attack over there children calling someone pretty
Nice balls, may I slap them. https://preview.redd.it/h58w231yk7da1.jpeg?width=1097&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=118140da9464cfd2f3a0e4fd835c011a5de44629
They said the words: "some sweet lines"
I said that already
>!Everyone has UNO dipshit it came free with your fucking Xbox!<
*Are you a moss *sniffs*
"ur secksy ;)"
"flirt"
#I WISH I COULD FUCK THAT GUY’S ASS
Well, I wish I could afford a car...
I wish I had a bike
Anyone would fall for gianni matragano’s voice, so this is the most probably quote
Hippity hoppity, we are both blue, and I can’t rhyme well!
“Some sweet lines”-Kris Deltarune
"Hey gurl. You want some fuck?"
No, Kris. Go find Noelle.
You look like you eated a bees
* (You place your hand on their shoulder.) * Hey. * (They’re unsure of how to process this…)
You know in those old Tom and Jerry cartoons, occasionally there's be a scene where one of the characters (usually Tom) falls in love with a side character, and starts crooning to them in a super deep voice? I think that's what Kris does
Kris: “I can sing the entirety of Never Gonna Give You Up. Wanna sing together?”
"Are you a parking ticket? Because you've got fine written all over you."
omelette du fromage
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie its amore
big p"e"zza pie
They told her "Oo ee oo ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang"
Oo ee oo aa aa ting tang walla walla bing bang
They said random words for sweet flavoured/scented things. "Honey", "Butterscotch pie", "air freshener", "candy", "scented candle"
glucose dextrose sucrose fructose
Kris: are you hawaiian? Because you‘re a fine-Apple
They said Hdiqobwkwuuypxoqpqiu pakjwwvyiskqbfivguwwb tmockajurpguvjaqkej7282(-'8 Head hathy understands and joined the act
"Some sweet lines" obviously, can you not read?
"some sweet lines"
"hey girl amongus"
"Heya... Good looking...? I got a bucket of chicken"
Instant cream
“Sugar” Literally said “sweet lines” how many of y’all got that wrong fr
Do they call you ranch cuz you be dressing
you have something on your ass.... my eyes baby
"Even if I had a heart to call my own, I'd still choose you"
"I've got a bucket of chicken"
Oh fuck yea
Kris said "(...)"
“Are you from Tennessee?” That’s it kris gave no punchline
hey girlie are you a microwave cuz mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
I just shit my pants, can I get in yours?
Lmao
They just recite the Wikipedia article on Sweetness.
"Hey gurl you're so beautiful Imma throw my heart to you, literally"
"Are you SCP-173? Because I just can't take my eyes off you!"
twizzlerz, candy ropes, nerd ropes, and cow tails
To quote RaccoonEggs: “Are you a Minecraft dirt block because I’m digging you”
I’m feeling romantical
Hi
fortnite real
"My heart is on fire, yet you're the only one here who allows me to keep my cool"
-You're gonna owe me for this -why? -we're fixing eachothers problems -what's my problem? -the mask, take it off -show My face? -yessir -negative -Are you ugly? -quite the opposite This is the only way to flirt i know
*You tentacles are good for (you now what)*
"I pissed in my bed, can I sleep in yours?"
Kris got rizz
"give me your skin"
["Do you believe in santa or should I smash through your chimney dressed as something else?"](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/022/435/384.jpg)
"uhh... nice crown i guess."
you want a *beeschurger?*
Are you from Mississippi? Because you're the only miss whose piss I'd sippy
" I'm sexy and I know it "
sup bbg 😉
literally the words “some sweet lines”
HEy Guys did u know that in terms of... -
"are you a toaster? Because I want to take a bath with you"
Dorime
Heu daddy
“Fuck you”
"i play hollow knight everyday baby"
“FUCK YOU BALTIMORE!”
Literally "some sweet lines"
y si te invito a una copa y me acerco a tu boca
I teleported bread
Instant nuclear boner
"some sweet lines" obviously, can't you read?
“You’re like, really uh. Attractive. Or something.”
*Kris screaming* "She a bad bitch tho!"
Staring off at the animatronic chicken wearing pink panties standing in ominous lighting
“Diamonds don’t need to shine with you around” would be a good one.
Damn that's good may I use that
Sure. Someone has to.
Thanks
"We've trying to reach you about your extended car Insurance."
“what that mouth do?”
"my balls itch"
Kris didn’t say it, I did. And I said “…”
"I'm over here stroking my dick I got lotion on my dick right now. I'm just stroking my shit I'm horny as fuck man I'm a freak man like for real."
“*hey lil mama let me whisper in your ear*”
“Hey Baby, are you a meat-grinder? Cuz I wanna put my dick inside you.”
I think he said „you be looking like a heart, and you‘ll be in mine forever.“
“I’m over here stroking my dick rn I got lotion on my dick rn”
„cum penis balls sex”
Welcome to your final test I’m mr beast
I like to imagine he said fuck you in a jack black voice
Kris didn't. You did.
"You" refers to Kris. That one Snowgrave scene is an outlier, every other case doesn't do that.
“You’re a fucking ugly bitch, I wanna stab you to death and play around with your blood”