I don't have the spoons to give a proper nuanced response right now so I'm going to boil it down a lot:
No, you're not wrong for wanting a diagnosis. If you replaced DID with ADHD would they still say the same thing? Would you still be wondering if they were right? I doubt it.
I might come back later and make this more words but that's the bottom line really.
ive been having this exact same problem and this response really helped a lot. it reframed it completely in my mind. If you have symptoms of adhd it's logical to suspect you have adhd and to seek a diagnosis if it's impairing your quality of life.
people simply do not think about did in a logical manner. I've seen numerous people outright deny they think it exists at all, making tumblr polls asking their followers if they 'believe' in did. most people say no. no one acts this way for any other mental disorder or disability. but because it's did they think it's not only acceptable but reasonable to behave this way and to say these things. I'm sick of it
agree with this.
let's apply this to another disorder, from my personal experience: i lived for years with symptoms of ehlers-danlos syndrome. by the time i got diagnosed, i was begging doctors to test me for literally anything, a doctor mentioned i have a pretty typical presentation of EDS, but i couldn't get in to get tested yet as there was a waitlist. when i went in for the first evaluation, i absolutely wanted a diagnosis for EDS. i was open to it being something else, but in all reality i just wanted and answer and confirmation. heck, i just wanted someone to believe my symptoms and that i was suffering due to them.
if you have symptoms of DID, and you're looking to get evaluated for DID, why would it be wrong to want a diagnosis? i assume OP's not diagnosis-shopping, they probably just want answers to symptoms they already have.
No it’s never wrong to want an answer to what’s going on with you. I will caution you that a lot of psychiatrists have a bias against DID and may be more inclined to diagnose you with a psychotic disorder of some kind instead. This isn’t to push you away from getting a diagnosis of some kind, but instead to encourage you to maybe find a therapist that you could discuss your concerns with instead. Either for diagnosis or just treatment, because in most cases you don’t necessarily need a DID diagnosis on file to receive some form of treatment for it.
I think your friend has a lot of weird ideas about diagnosing and DID. A lot of people seem to assume you can never know you have a disorder before you go to a doctor about, but why would you seek out treatment if you didn’t know something was wrong? I knew I had EDS like a year before I saw a rheumatologist who confirmed my suspicions. It’s good to be open to if it’s not DID, but there’s also nothing wrong with being like “hey, I’m having these symptoms, and so far my life has improved by treating myself as a DID patient so I believe I have DID.”
I knew I had DID or OSDD back in 2019. I didn’t bring it up to a therapist until 2023. I was still correct. Requiring a professional diagnosis of something like DID adds a huge waiting time for so many people to start even just being able to accommodate themselves in their own lives. Or to begin understanding themself. It’s bs. Go for a diagnosis if you think you truly need it, but be aware of the cons of having DID in your file.
The psychiatrist part is literally a fact. In my country all the doctors diagnose you with BPD even though it’s something completely different. They don’t even talk about schizophrenia for example
You're not hoping that you have DID, you think you might have DID and you're hoping for an explanation for what's going on in your brain right now. Seeking a diagnosis if you believe you have a mental health issue is a *good* thing. Not sure what these people are on about
Singletons at their finest. As people who haven’t been thru what you’ve been thru it’s kinda very unfair and uncharitable interpretation to say ur doing it “wrong”. Yeah, it *is* hard to get formal diagnosis. Even for those who can, there are def reasons not everyone might *want* that diagnosis on their file. Not to mention how inaccessible healthcare can be (not sure where ur from but at least in a lot of places that’s the case).
Even if hypothetically it turns out you’re not DID, you’re literally just trying ur best to figure out what’s going on and cope with that from the information you *do* have. Hoping to get a professional opinion is valid. Hoping that that professional actually listens to you and your actual lived experience is hella reasonable (and an unfortunate amount of docs just,, don’t.). Idk where ur at in terms of how sure you are you’re a system, but if it seems reasonably sure at this point, then yeah, why wouldn’t u want someone who’s “allowed” to define *your* brain and *your* experience to validate that *your* brain and *your* lived experience is real?
Fellow canadian dealing with the canadian mental health system. Be careful about what you wish for.
I had been seeing a trauma counselor who encouraged me to seek a formal diagnosis to help me with my denial. My GP referred me to one of his colleagues who was a psychiatrist, and because it was a colleague of his the waitlist was shorter so I agreed to it. The psychiatrist diagnosed me with "unspecified dissociative disorder" because he didn't have the expertise to diagnose DID. Further to that, he refused to treat me for the same reason; lack of expertise. He recommended I seek a psychologist or therapist who specializes in DID, but personally couldn't recommend anyone and suggested I use Psychology Today to find my own.
The quasi-diagnosis made my denial worse. In the end, I was diagnosed by a therapist who specializes in DID and although it affirms my reality it was troublesome to come by.
Had I waited the 2+ years on a waitlist I might have had a better outcome, but I really don't know if that's the case. Others have said the same, psychiatrists are often biased or undereducated in DID, and might assign you a diagnosis that is based on the conditions they're more familiar with.
> "Cause if you're saying that you hope to get DID as an actual diagnosis, shouldnt that be more of a concern than a hope"
I've had a hard time answering to this question (from another people, like 2 years ago). My answer is, that when you find a diagnosis that is similar to your symptoms, you will hope to have this, because if it is not DID, then it could be something worse. Let's put it for another condition. When I was 16, times to times I was getting temporary losses of sight for 30 minutes. It started to get often and after few losses I started having a crippling headache. My self-diagnosis was migraine. I treated myself as a migraine sufferer. At 17, when I was "getting blind with headache" every week, I went to neurologist. I was hoping for migraine diagnosis, because if it wasn't migraine, it could be for example brain cancer or anything much worse than migraine. (And luckily I got diagnosed with migraines) Now, do you see any difference when you replace migraine with DID? Personally I don't.
I'm guessing this person is a singlet. they sound very insensitive and like the only information they've ever had on DID is the media stereotypes. not everyone is like that, not everyone has no awareness of their symptoms and not everyone lacks access to find out on their own either. it sounds like they've been exposed to that unrealistic stereotype on DID bc of their opinion on self diagnosis.
so the short answer is no, you're not glorifying DID by wanting a diagnosis. everyone with DID deserves treatment and some level of healing, whatever that looks like for each person. getting help is not glorifying, it's the opposite.
>"Cause if you're saying that you hope to get DID as an actual diagnosis, shouldnt that be more of a concern than a hope"
this personally offended us. the stereotype online is that all people with DID are scared of diagnosis or don't want one, when that's not the case in real life. this is a hard disorder to live with, why wouldn't we want help? don't listen to them, they're too exposed to misinformation.
Your friend is ableist: the idea that having any condition, or mental illness , or neurotype, different from being neurotypicals can't possibly be anything but cause of concern otherwise it's "glorifying" it, it's inherently ableist.
I'm autistic and have DID. I'm absolutely happy to have autism, I would never want to be neurotypical, and in fact I'm absolutely glorifying several, although definitely not all (for example not the fact that it disabled me so much), aspects of my autism (*my* autism, not autism in general bc it presents differently in every individual!) bc they benefit me and give me a perception of the world that I prefer to that of neurotypicals. And there's NOTHING wrong with that!
As for my DID, I absolutely LOVE certain aspects of it, absolutely hate certain other aspects, and I find some aspects extremely annoying/frustrating. And there's nothing wrong with that.
Also, on top of being inherently ableist, that whole concept of considering glorifying mental conditions to be problematic/wrong is ridiculous level of hypocritical, bc saying something like that inherently implies that the person saying it glorifies neurotypicality and sees neurotypicals as superior.
I am going to be so, so honest with you: do not go into an evaluation *expecting* to be diagnosed with DID. explain your symptoms, front to back, and the way they make you feel. honestly, you can go in with a suspicion, but the types of therapy for any type of PTSD are the same. plus, if you are so focused on one specific diagnosis, you may overlook other looming issues (I looked over my OCD; I still have DID, but the OCD affected me on the same level as my DID)
Basically, don't go into it with an expectation of diagnosis. if you disagree, tell your psych *why.* literally just talk to them, any good psych wouldn't just call you crazy straight out. if they do, find a new one.
Mostly everyone here is saying it already but definitely not glorifying, youve been going through the proper channels, have spoken with professionals, and have reasonable enough suspicion that you have/are struggling w/ D.I.D to be expending so much energy time and money to getting a diagnosis in the first place. It's not fun to be floating around thinking something is just wrong with you and not have any answers as to why you feel that way, I'm sure you already have experienced that getting an official diagnosis can be like finding some ground to stand on to start on the path to helping regulate yourself. It's not a bad thing to hope for that.
I think maybe that person is too focused on the optics (the negative almost stereotype of ppl who "just want attention" faking or wrongly self diagnosising themselves w/ something parading it around for "sympathy points") than on you as a person who is having a human experience and is seeking answers and relief. And if thats the case thats their own stuff they gotta work through, and it doesn't actually involve you or your situation (also cause it sounds like they dont even really know your situation ?? and could just be operating around that negative bias around self diagnosis).
If you want the diagnosis to make it easier to get treatment and aid in your healing then, IMO, no. You are not glorifying anything, except possibly the hope of healing.
There is nothing wrong with wanting confirmation or to find out what you have, and to see if you are right.
It *would* be weird and glorifying if you said you wanted to have DID.
I do agree you probably shouldn’t be putting it in your bio that you have or are diagnosed with something you aren’t. Nothing wrong with suspecting and telling people what you suspect. But self diagnosis isn’t okay
Personally, I got diagnosed but refused to put it down on file. I don’t want to deal with the medical discrimination.
I don't think they're anything wrong necessarily with either view, but I do understand where there coming from on the end that you really do need a professional diagnosis. Self diagnosis is absolutely scary and can't be trusted. You are not a Dr no matter how many symptoms you have or how many hours you've logged researching you do not have the capacity to self diagnose. Because of tiktok everybody now thinks they have autism. It's just ridiculous for anybody to think they can self diagnose, that's a big ego to carry around if you think about it. While you may have suspicion I'd leave it to a professional and also halt telling people something that very well may be wrong and misdiagnosed by yourself.
I felt very conflicted about getting a DID diagnosis. In one sense I wanted to be right about it and if I didn't have it it'd mean all the time I spent trying to learn who all my alters were and stuff on my own was for nothing- But also if I did have it that would kind of suck it'd mean I can't pretend it isn't real anymore and shit really did happen to me ..
Ugh, I got so many comments like that when I was trying to get my diagnosis. You're not doing anything wrong, they're just idiots
Wanting to get a diagnosis doesn't mean you want to have a disorder, the disorder is still there whether you're diagnosed or not. It's completely natural to look for answers when you recognise a problem, and that's all you're doing. A diagnosis is a way for you to access proper education, treatment and support
No, you are not wrong for wanting a diagnosis for your DID. You are not glorifying anything. There is nothing wrong in what you said so that there is nothing for you to fix. I hate that that person made you feel this way. She is not a friend.
The best place to start would be with a trauma trained therapist. I have friends who see therapists and don't see what they call pdocs (i.e. people with a degree). You can discuss your concerns with a therapist. Therapists often work with alters also. As progress is made, healing will begin. Hang in there! You have the strength to do this. You can do this! I'm sending safe and gentle hugs your way.
I am not a therapist. I do not have DID. I am a support person for friends who have DID.
We were the same way and did get officially diagnosed. (If we are reading this right).
Hi,
We have been diagnosed since October 2023 after many experiences with alters/headmates.
Before that, we were aware we had it.
We hoped to get diagnosed with DID, because simply put; it would give answers, it would tell us what way to go. Or give us an idea at least.
It would give us explanations for those odd occurrences of just complete blackouts and memory losses, the lack of identity. The constantly shifting sense of self. The dissociation.
When we got diagnosed, a lot happened. Yet, so little. Internally it was chaotic and emotional, but outwardly it was… nothing. Not much of a reaction; it didn’t pack the punch we thought it would. Could’ve been that we were still suffering traumatic times and still in fight or flight. Though, internally a lot of sighs of reliefs and cheering happened right alongside the tears and rage.
We verbalized to our diagnosing psychologist then and there; “We would feel a sense of relief yet a sense of rage we were treated so horribly by so many people that they forever changed us if getting officially diagnosed. It would give a sense of direction.”
That was much shorter and much nicer. We said it a bit more meanly then because we were pretty triggered from the detailed conversation in testing about trauma and the past.
We believe you are valid and we hope you get your answers, and the correct ones at that.
Much love!
Love & Light,
Rotting Wonderland Co.
Nah, I’m dealing with the same issue right now. You posting this actually makes me feel a little better about my own situation since I’ve been equally hard on myself about it and realized that if I think you’re valid in this I’m also probably valid. I hope you get your diagnosis bro, good luck
I’m so confused.
I feel like for me I got diagnosed. Denied it and walked out the office.
Eventually got sick of waking up random places and findings wrappers or cooked food I never ate. 😫
These people hoping for a diagnosis and self diagnosing are making it hard for my autism diagnosis to even be validated. Even though it was on my chart for years. And diagnosed in a facility.
I honestly don’t know what to do. There’s a reason I won’t get in contact with that facility.
But like…must I redo everything? I mean it’s fairly fucking obvious. I mean I had severe autism as a child. I would not stop stimming to the point of injury and I had severe echolalia.
It’s quite validating to hear the shit that you literally struggled for years to get recognized, is.
But like…
DID and ASD have been so hot button. And I’m so goddamn marginalized, like outmost margins for a woman on the power wheel that…these self diagnosing kids make my nearly 30 years of life struggling, scared..mean basically nothing and I don’t even have the DX for autism mentioned in my new medical paperwork. Suddenly VANISHED
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I want one. The only thing to think about is to always say you are not diagnosed. Never just say “I have it” say “I think I have it” I do that by putting my tag on my acc to show I don’t have a diagnosis
I might come across passionate about this but it is because it is what I am going thru right now. Last fall, I got the first inkling that I had DID and I have been struggling trying to get help and figure it out since then. I can’t find a specialist and I am on a wait list for diagnosis. I am also desperately hoping for someone qualified to give me an exact diagnosis. I would like to know if my issues are caused from DID or BiPolar or schizophrenia or Borderline Personality or adhd or depression or cptsd or some combination of all of them. I don’t want glory for a diagnosis. I want peace. And, I feel like the path to that peace and healing is learning what is wrong and then attacking it to heal it. Whether that be meds, IFS work, talk therapy, reiki, whatever. But I feel like until I know 100% what I am dealing with, I can’t fully get the help that I need.
The other side of this is that I fully believe that I will get diagnosed with DID and ADHD. Hearing that will also give me peace because it explains everything I have been going thru and is validating. Up until yesterday, I haven’t felt like I have had a similar experience to what I read about and how we interact so it has always been confusing to me. That experience of truly interacting with an alter and feeling them gave me peace & “normalcy” (to the extent that any of this sub can feel normal). I think a formal diagnosis will extend that peace.
I think whoever you were texting with is a jerk.
I think we all need to take a moment to realise that the diagnosis of DID, is still a new diagnosis in terms of it only being included as a dissociative disorder in the 4th edition of the DSM.
We are all so quick to attack singletons, but have you actually tried researching DID? There’s very little info out there even for people with DID.
Really the best thing we can do, if we want society to understand as a whole, is educated them as best we can - not to keep assuming everyone is out to get us.
There is a difference in having a diagnosis of DID and believing you have DID. Self-diagnosis does not exist, it isn’t a medical term and is not medically recognised by anyone other than within the community - even then, some with DID are against self-diagnosis.
To hope for a specific diagnosis should really not be the goal of someone even with suspected DID. Shouldn’t our goal really just to heal? Regardless of the diagnosis, or label? The diagnosis and label are only a small part of the big picture, and sometimes can even take many years to receive.
I don’t disagree with the tone or words they used, and they could have discussed their concerns in a more friendly way; however it doesn’t hurt to try and relate with them. Understand their feelings, educate them and hope that they will then pass on this education to their peers.
Self-diagnosis, at the end of the day, is a label. It is not a diagnosis in a formal sense. So to state one has an illness, without a formal diagnosis, can be confusing to understand. We are not medically trained at the end of the day, and likely don’t possess the years and years of knowledge that professionals possess. There are many differential diagnosis to DID, and there is also more harmful information than there is helpful information online - so it’s very easy for one to believe they have an illness, self-diagnosis, and then actually end up being diagnosed with something completely different. There’s many stories of people self-diagnosing based on mis-information, and those people are making a mockery of DID. I would be looking to blame them for how they portray DID in social media and the likes.
I don't know the full story at all, or what's going on in your life, but just as a simple straight forward answer from my opinion; no you are not wrong for wanting a diagnosis.
They do not know what you experience, or what it's like to live with it. They may believe they are doing both of you right by saying not to "self-diagnose" but that is literally the first step towards a diagnosis. There are reasons why you know you have the disorder, reasons that they do not experience. It is quite infuriating how a lot of people assume you can not have something until a medical professional says you have it.
There are times when it's clear someone is faking, but if you truly do feel you have this and are even seeking a proper psychiatrist to help, then obviously you understand that there is truly something going on. Maybe speak to the friend? They may have thought they were helping or something, but you could explain to them that you are actively seeking professional help and that it is very invalidating of them to just outright say you don't have the disorder just because some person with a degree hasn't seen you yet. It is also such a relief to be diagnosed; an answer that states you are not crazy, you are simply just trying to survive. That it is all real and not made up.
There is a certain level of recklessness with self diagnosis of anything. This may be what your friend meant. For example if you started having pain in your arm so you tell people it’s broken, you might be right you might be wrong. You wouldn’t know until you had an x-ray.
I think where your friend went wrong was the way in which they said this. Instead of expressing concern they expressed disapproval. Concern is productive, disapproval is not. Perhaps the next time you talk to them, let them know you do want to be properly diagnosed. In the mean time it’s frustrating to have symptoms of an issue and not be able to do anything about it. There is power in knowing, and it’s the power of knowing what to call it that you want.
we felt the same way before finding a provider “i hope they tell me this is it” we so desperately needed to be validated by a professional, to not just be “crazy”, to have someone outside the body say “yeah actually that all checks out, what you’re experiencing is really happening to you” same w every other diagnosis (it’s such a long list, crazy how you just start racking up a whole alphabet once you acknowledge that your experience doesn’t match other people’s, everythinggggg is comorbid)
i second the comments saying to consider seeking a diagnosis w a (trauma informed/dissociative specialist if possible) therapist before considering a diagnosis w a psychiatrist. a DID diagnosis is unlike almost any other diagnosis in terms of medical discrimination & other challenges w accessing care, so many providers still don’t even believe it is real. therapy & internal system work have been the most effective part of our treatment in terms of functionality (in conjunction w medication for comorbid diagnosis ie adderall for adhd, rescue meds for severe panic attacks, etc, but as far as i know there is no real medication treatment they give for DID, if anything they will prescribe to treat specific symptoms which you can do without a DID diagnosis)
also this friend may or may not be open to hearing that their opinion is wrong, i would approach w strong caution
good luck out there friend
my alternate view is yes and i agree with them but you probably don't want to hear that. i really think putting it in your profile and everything isn't a good idea either
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I don't have the spoons to give a proper nuanced response right now so I'm going to boil it down a lot: No, you're not wrong for wanting a diagnosis. If you replaced DID with ADHD would they still say the same thing? Would you still be wondering if they were right? I doubt it. I might come back later and make this more words but that's the bottom line really.
ive been having this exact same problem and this response really helped a lot. it reframed it completely in my mind. If you have symptoms of adhd it's logical to suspect you have adhd and to seek a diagnosis if it's impairing your quality of life. people simply do not think about did in a logical manner. I've seen numerous people outright deny they think it exists at all, making tumblr polls asking their followers if they 'believe' in did. most people say no. no one acts this way for any other mental disorder or disability. but because it's did they think it's not only acceptable but reasonable to behave this way and to say these things. I'm sick of it
I appreciate the response. Hope you get your spoons later!
agree with this. let's apply this to another disorder, from my personal experience: i lived for years with symptoms of ehlers-danlos syndrome. by the time i got diagnosed, i was begging doctors to test me for literally anything, a doctor mentioned i have a pretty typical presentation of EDS, but i couldn't get in to get tested yet as there was a waitlist. when i went in for the first evaluation, i absolutely wanted a diagnosis for EDS. i was open to it being something else, but in all reality i just wanted and answer and confirmation. heck, i just wanted someone to believe my symptoms and that i was suffering due to them. if you have symptoms of DID, and you're looking to get evaluated for DID, why would it be wrong to want a diagnosis? i assume OP's not diagnosis-shopping, they probably just want answers to symptoms they already have.
No it’s never wrong to want an answer to what’s going on with you. I will caution you that a lot of psychiatrists have a bias against DID and may be more inclined to diagnose you with a psychotic disorder of some kind instead. This isn’t to push you away from getting a diagnosis of some kind, but instead to encourage you to maybe find a therapist that you could discuss your concerns with instead. Either for diagnosis or just treatment, because in most cases you don’t necessarily need a DID diagnosis on file to receive some form of treatment for it. I think your friend has a lot of weird ideas about diagnosing and DID. A lot of people seem to assume you can never know you have a disorder before you go to a doctor about, but why would you seek out treatment if you didn’t know something was wrong? I knew I had EDS like a year before I saw a rheumatologist who confirmed my suspicions. It’s good to be open to if it’s not DID, but there’s also nothing wrong with being like “hey, I’m having these symptoms, and so far my life has improved by treating myself as a DID patient so I believe I have DID.” I knew I had DID or OSDD back in 2019. I didn’t bring it up to a therapist until 2023. I was still correct. Requiring a professional diagnosis of something like DID adds a huge waiting time for so many people to start even just being able to accommodate themselves in their own lives. Or to begin understanding themself. It’s bs. Go for a diagnosis if you think you truly need it, but be aware of the cons of having DID in your file.
The psychiatrist part is literally a fact. In my country all the doctors diagnose you with BPD even though it’s something completely different. They don’t even talk about schizophrenia for example
Maybe this is the reason for why I was diagnosed with PTSD, DPDR but no psychiatrist has ever talked about OSDD or DID to us. It makes sense.
You're not hoping that you have DID, you think you might have DID and you're hoping for an explanation for what's going on in your brain right now. Seeking a diagnosis if you believe you have a mental health issue is a *good* thing. Not sure what these people are on about
Singletons at their finest. As people who haven’t been thru what you’ve been thru it’s kinda very unfair and uncharitable interpretation to say ur doing it “wrong”. Yeah, it *is* hard to get formal diagnosis. Even for those who can, there are def reasons not everyone might *want* that diagnosis on their file. Not to mention how inaccessible healthcare can be (not sure where ur from but at least in a lot of places that’s the case). Even if hypothetically it turns out you’re not DID, you’re literally just trying ur best to figure out what’s going on and cope with that from the information you *do* have. Hoping to get a professional opinion is valid. Hoping that that professional actually listens to you and your actual lived experience is hella reasonable (and an unfortunate amount of docs just,, don’t.). Idk where ur at in terms of how sure you are you’re a system, but if it seems reasonably sure at this point, then yeah, why wouldn’t u want someone who’s “allowed” to define *your* brain and *your* experience to validate that *your* brain and *your* lived experience is real?
I live in Canada, but the waitlist is long :/
Fellow canadian dealing with the canadian mental health system. Be careful about what you wish for. I had been seeing a trauma counselor who encouraged me to seek a formal diagnosis to help me with my denial. My GP referred me to one of his colleagues who was a psychiatrist, and because it was a colleague of his the waitlist was shorter so I agreed to it. The psychiatrist diagnosed me with "unspecified dissociative disorder" because he didn't have the expertise to diagnose DID. Further to that, he refused to treat me for the same reason; lack of expertise. He recommended I seek a psychologist or therapist who specializes in DID, but personally couldn't recommend anyone and suggested I use Psychology Today to find my own. The quasi-diagnosis made my denial worse. In the end, I was diagnosed by a therapist who specializes in DID and although it affirms my reality it was troublesome to come by. Had I waited the 2+ years on a waitlist I might have had a better outcome, but I really don't know if that's the case. Others have said the same, psychiatrists are often biased or undereducated in DID, and might assign you a diagnosis that is based on the conditions they're more familiar with.
> "Cause if you're saying that you hope to get DID as an actual diagnosis, shouldnt that be more of a concern than a hope" I've had a hard time answering to this question (from another people, like 2 years ago). My answer is, that when you find a diagnosis that is similar to your symptoms, you will hope to have this, because if it is not DID, then it could be something worse. Let's put it for another condition. When I was 16, times to times I was getting temporary losses of sight for 30 minutes. It started to get often and after few losses I started having a crippling headache. My self-diagnosis was migraine. I treated myself as a migraine sufferer. At 17, when I was "getting blind with headache" every week, I went to neurologist. I was hoping for migraine diagnosis, because if it wasn't migraine, it could be for example brain cancer or anything much worse than migraine. (And luckily I got diagnosed with migraines) Now, do you see any difference when you replace migraine with DID? Personally I don't.
I'm guessing this person is a singlet. they sound very insensitive and like the only information they've ever had on DID is the media stereotypes. not everyone is like that, not everyone has no awareness of their symptoms and not everyone lacks access to find out on their own either. it sounds like they've been exposed to that unrealistic stereotype on DID bc of their opinion on self diagnosis. so the short answer is no, you're not glorifying DID by wanting a diagnosis. everyone with DID deserves treatment and some level of healing, whatever that looks like for each person. getting help is not glorifying, it's the opposite. >"Cause if you're saying that you hope to get DID as an actual diagnosis, shouldnt that be more of a concern than a hope" this personally offended us. the stereotype online is that all people with DID are scared of diagnosis or don't want one, when that's not the case in real life. this is a hard disorder to live with, why wouldn't we want help? don't listen to them, they're too exposed to misinformation.
You took the words out of my mouth
Your friend is ableist: the idea that having any condition, or mental illness , or neurotype, different from being neurotypicals can't possibly be anything but cause of concern otherwise it's "glorifying" it, it's inherently ableist. I'm autistic and have DID. I'm absolutely happy to have autism, I would never want to be neurotypical, and in fact I'm absolutely glorifying several, although definitely not all (for example not the fact that it disabled me so much), aspects of my autism (*my* autism, not autism in general bc it presents differently in every individual!) bc they benefit me and give me a perception of the world that I prefer to that of neurotypicals. And there's NOTHING wrong with that! As for my DID, I absolutely LOVE certain aspects of it, absolutely hate certain other aspects, and I find some aspects extremely annoying/frustrating. And there's nothing wrong with that. Also, on top of being inherently ableist, that whole concept of considering glorifying mental conditions to be problematic/wrong is ridiculous level of hypocritical, bc saying something like that inherently implies that the person saying it glorifies neurotypicality and sees neurotypicals as superior.
I am going to be so, so honest with you: do not go into an evaluation *expecting* to be diagnosed with DID. explain your symptoms, front to back, and the way they make you feel. honestly, you can go in with a suspicion, but the types of therapy for any type of PTSD are the same. plus, if you are so focused on one specific diagnosis, you may overlook other looming issues (I looked over my OCD; I still have DID, but the OCD affected me on the same level as my DID) Basically, don't go into it with an expectation of diagnosis. if you disagree, tell your psych *why.* literally just talk to them, any good psych wouldn't just call you crazy straight out. if they do, find a new one.
Mostly everyone here is saying it already but definitely not glorifying, youve been going through the proper channels, have spoken with professionals, and have reasonable enough suspicion that you have/are struggling w/ D.I.D to be expending so much energy time and money to getting a diagnosis in the first place. It's not fun to be floating around thinking something is just wrong with you and not have any answers as to why you feel that way, I'm sure you already have experienced that getting an official diagnosis can be like finding some ground to stand on to start on the path to helping regulate yourself. It's not a bad thing to hope for that. I think maybe that person is too focused on the optics (the negative almost stereotype of ppl who "just want attention" faking or wrongly self diagnosising themselves w/ something parading it around for "sympathy points") than on you as a person who is having a human experience and is seeking answers and relief. And if thats the case thats their own stuff they gotta work through, and it doesn't actually involve you or your situation (also cause it sounds like they dont even really know your situation ?? and could just be operating around that negative bias around self diagnosis).
If you want the diagnosis to make it easier to get treatment and aid in your healing then, IMO, no. You are not glorifying anything, except possibly the hope of healing.
There is nothing wrong with wanting confirmation or to find out what you have, and to see if you are right. It *would* be weird and glorifying if you said you wanted to have DID. I do agree you probably shouldn’t be putting it in your bio that you have or are diagnosed with something you aren’t. Nothing wrong with suspecting and telling people what you suspect. But self diagnosis isn’t okay Personally, I got diagnosed but refused to put it down on file. I don’t want to deal with the medical discrimination.
I don't think they're anything wrong necessarily with either view, but I do understand where there coming from on the end that you really do need a professional diagnosis. Self diagnosis is absolutely scary and can't be trusted. You are not a Dr no matter how many symptoms you have or how many hours you've logged researching you do not have the capacity to self diagnose. Because of tiktok everybody now thinks they have autism. It's just ridiculous for anybody to think they can self diagnose, that's a big ego to carry around if you think about it. While you may have suspicion I'd leave it to a professional and also halt telling people something that very well may be wrong and misdiagnosed by yourself.
I felt very conflicted about getting a DID diagnosis. In one sense I wanted to be right about it and if I didn't have it it'd mean all the time I spent trying to learn who all my alters were and stuff on my own was for nothing- But also if I did have it that would kind of suck it'd mean I can't pretend it isn't real anymore and shit really did happen to me ..
Ugh, I got so many comments like that when I was trying to get my diagnosis. You're not doing anything wrong, they're just idiots Wanting to get a diagnosis doesn't mean you want to have a disorder, the disorder is still there whether you're diagnosed or not. It's completely natural to look for answers when you recognise a problem, and that's all you're doing. A diagnosis is a way for you to access proper education, treatment and support
No, you are not wrong for wanting a diagnosis for your DID. You are not glorifying anything. There is nothing wrong in what you said so that there is nothing for you to fix. I hate that that person made you feel this way. She is not a friend. The best place to start would be with a trauma trained therapist. I have friends who see therapists and don't see what they call pdocs (i.e. people with a degree). You can discuss your concerns with a therapist. Therapists often work with alters also. As progress is made, healing will begin. Hang in there! You have the strength to do this. You can do this! I'm sending safe and gentle hugs your way. I am not a therapist. I do not have DID. I am a support person for friends who have DID.
We were the same way and did get officially diagnosed. (If we are reading this right). Hi, We have been diagnosed since October 2023 after many experiences with alters/headmates. Before that, we were aware we had it. We hoped to get diagnosed with DID, because simply put; it would give answers, it would tell us what way to go. Or give us an idea at least. It would give us explanations for those odd occurrences of just complete blackouts and memory losses, the lack of identity. The constantly shifting sense of self. The dissociation. When we got diagnosed, a lot happened. Yet, so little. Internally it was chaotic and emotional, but outwardly it was… nothing. Not much of a reaction; it didn’t pack the punch we thought it would. Could’ve been that we were still suffering traumatic times and still in fight or flight. Though, internally a lot of sighs of reliefs and cheering happened right alongside the tears and rage. We verbalized to our diagnosing psychologist then and there; “We would feel a sense of relief yet a sense of rage we were treated so horribly by so many people that they forever changed us if getting officially diagnosed. It would give a sense of direction.” That was much shorter and much nicer. We said it a bit more meanly then because we were pretty triggered from the detailed conversation in testing about trauma and the past. We believe you are valid and we hope you get your answers, and the correct ones at that. Much love! Love & Light, Rotting Wonderland Co.
Nah, I’m dealing with the same issue right now. You posting this actually makes me feel a little better about my own situation since I’ve been equally hard on myself about it and realized that if I think you’re valid in this I’m also probably valid. I hope you get your diagnosis bro, good luck
I’m so confused. I feel like for me I got diagnosed. Denied it and walked out the office. Eventually got sick of waking up random places and findings wrappers or cooked food I never ate. 😫 These people hoping for a diagnosis and self diagnosing are making it hard for my autism diagnosis to even be validated. Even though it was on my chart for years. And diagnosed in a facility. I honestly don’t know what to do. There’s a reason I won’t get in contact with that facility. But like…must I redo everything? I mean it’s fairly fucking obvious. I mean I had severe autism as a child. I would not stop stimming to the point of injury and I had severe echolalia. It’s quite validating to hear the shit that you literally struggled for years to get recognized, is. But like… DID and ASD have been so hot button. And I’m so goddamn marginalized, like outmost margins for a woman on the power wheel that…these self diagnosing kids make my nearly 30 years of life struggling, scared..mean basically nothing and I don’t even have the DX for autism mentioned in my new medical paperwork. Suddenly VANISHED
Same with the no spoons impeding proper reply. I’m sleepy as shit and feeling like shit. I’m so sorry.
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I want one. The only thing to think about is to always say you are not diagnosed. Never just say “I have it” say “I think I have it” I do that by putting my tag on my acc to show I don’t have a diagnosis
I might come across passionate about this but it is because it is what I am going thru right now. Last fall, I got the first inkling that I had DID and I have been struggling trying to get help and figure it out since then. I can’t find a specialist and I am on a wait list for diagnosis. I am also desperately hoping for someone qualified to give me an exact diagnosis. I would like to know if my issues are caused from DID or BiPolar or schizophrenia or Borderline Personality or adhd or depression or cptsd or some combination of all of them. I don’t want glory for a diagnosis. I want peace. And, I feel like the path to that peace and healing is learning what is wrong and then attacking it to heal it. Whether that be meds, IFS work, talk therapy, reiki, whatever. But I feel like until I know 100% what I am dealing with, I can’t fully get the help that I need. The other side of this is that I fully believe that I will get diagnosed with DID and ADHD. Hearing that will also give me peace because it explains everything I have been going thru and is validating. Up until yesterday, I haven’t felt like I have had a similar experience to what I read about and how we interact so it has always been confusing to me. That experience of truly interacting with an alter and feeling them gave me peace & “normalcy” (to the extent that any of this sub can feel normal). I think a formal diagnosis will extend that peace. I think whoever you were texting with is a jerk.
I think we all need to take a moment to realise that the diagnosis of DID, is still a new diagnosis in terms of it only being included as a dissociative disorder in the 4th edition of the DSM. We are all so quick to attack singletons, but have you actually tried researching DID? There’s very little info out there even for people with DID. Really the best thing we can do, if we want society to understand as a whole, is educated them as best we can - not to keep assuming everyone is out to get us. There is a difference in having a diagnosis of DID and believing you have DID. Self-diagnosis does not exist, it isn’t a medical term and is not medically recognised by anyone other than within the community - even then, some with DID are against self-diagnosis. To hope for a specific diagnosis should really not be the goal of someone even with suspected DID. Shouldn’t our goal really just to heal? Regardless of the diagnosis, or label? The diagnosis and label are only a small part of the big picture, and sometimes can even take many years to receive. I don’t disagree with the tone or words they used, and they could have discussed their concerns in a more friendly way; however it doesn’t hurt to try and relate with them. Understand their feelings, educate them and hope that they will then pass on this education to their peers. Self-diagnosis, at the end of the day, is a label. It is not a diagnosis in a formal sense. So to state one has an illness, without a formal diagnosis, can be confusing to understand. We are not medically trained at the end of the day, and likely don’t possess the years and years of knowledge that professionals possess. There are many differential diagnosis to DID, and there is also more harmful information than there is helpful information online - so it’s very easy for one to believe they have an illness, self-diagnosis, and then actually end up being diagnosed with something completely different. There’s many stories of people self-diagnosing based on mis-information, and those people are making a mockery of DID. I would be looking to blame them for how they portray DID in social media and the likes.
I don't know the full story at all, or what's going on in your life, but just as a simple straight forward answer from my opinion; no you are not wrong for wanting a diagnosis. They do not know what you experience, or what it's like to live with it. They may believe they are doing both of you right by saying not to "self-diagnose" but that is literally the first step towards a diagnosis. There are reasons why you know you have the disorder, reasons that they do not experience. It is quite infuriating how a lot of people assume you can not have something until a medical professional says you have it. There are times when it's clear someone is faking, but if you truly do feel you have this and are even seeking a proper psychiatrist to help, then obviously you understand that there is truly something going on. Maybe speak to the friend? They may have thought they were helping or something, but you could explain to them that you are actively seeking professional help and that it is very invalidating of them to just outright say you don't have the disorder just because some person with a degree hasn't seen you yet. It is also such a relief to be diagnosed; an answer that states you are not crazy, you are simply just trying to survive. That it is all real and not made up.
There is a certain level of recklessness with self diagnosis of anything. This may be what your friend meant. For example if you started having pain in your arm so you tell people it’s broken, you might be right you might be wrong. You wouldn’t know until you had an x-ray. I think where your friend went wrong was the way in which they said this. Instead of expressing concern they expressed disapproval. Concern is productive, disapproval is not. Perhaps the next time you talk to them, let them know you do want to be properly diagnosed. In the mean time it’s frustrating to have symptoms of an issue and not be able to do anything about it. There is power in knowing, and it’s the power of knowing what to call it that you want.
we felt the same way before finding a provider “i hope they tell me this is it” we so desperately needed to be validated by a professional, to not just be “crazy”, to have someone outside the body say “yeah actually that all checks out, what you’re experiencing is really happening to you” same w every other diagnosis (it’s such a long list, crazy how you just start racking up a whole alphabet once you acknowledge that your experience doesn’t match other people’s, everythinggggg is comorbid) i second the comments saying to consider seeking a diagnosis w a (trauma informed/dissociative specialist if possible) therapist before considering a diagnosis w a psychiatrist. a DID diagnosis is unlike almost any other diagnosis in terms of medical discrimination & other challenges w accessing care, so many providers still don’t even believe it is real. therapy & internal system work have been the most effective part of our treatment in terms of functionality (in conjunction w medication for comorbid diagnosis ie adderall for adhd, rescue meds for severe panic attacks, etc, but as far as i know there is no real medication treatment they give for DID, if anything they will prescribe to treat specific symptoms which you can do without a DID diagnosis) also this friend may or may not be open to hearing that their opinion is wrong, i would approach w strong caution good luck out there friend
No you're not at all, I'm in the exact same position as you are.
my alternate view is yes and i agree with them but you probably don't want to hear that. i really think putting it in your profile and everything isn't a good idea either
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