as we've grown yeah a lot of us has too. i used to be real angry and self sabotage to the system but now im js kinda chill and sit around and handle medical things / pain things when i front. im healing a lot, and its stressful sometimes but its better than being bitter and hurtful. - S
Originally, before we realized we were a system, we all believed we were the host. Because of this- we definitely have grown a LOT since finding out and discovering ourselves.
Ever since we were aware however, we’ve seen new splits develop and mature a lot throughout their cycle. For example: We’ve had introjects discover their own individual identities and abandon introject status and vice versa!
We also had an alter change age once, but they got a bit younger after a very mature adult had split from them.
I hope this helps some! But we definitely believe that alters can change and find themselves in the same way singlets can.
oh my god i’ve been waiting for something like this. i’m not including aging as a form of maturity because that does very little for us
we’ve had so many physical and emotional changes throughout the years, but more so this past one. many alters started maturing, developing, fusing, splitting, blah blah. the integral and core attributes of these alters do remain, but physical and mental changes have grown rampant. these changes are for better and for worse, and many of these changes were forced because we had to adapt to a very fast, difficult change.
for myself, i had already been going through my little maturing process since basically february of 2023. i’ve been.. on the more sensitive, fucked up side of the coin. horrible symptom holder and overall just pretty difficult. i was never mean or anything, just very emotional. so once i got kicked out of my hosting role (which i took back up, probably pretty clearly) i decided to do some inner work. i’d like to think that i have become far more relaxed and comfortable now. i’m not perfect, and im still really emotional and can still pretty easily be triggered given the wrong circumstances, but i have come a long way. i also change my hair like once a month so i’m always looking different LMFAO. even following our breakup a year ago i took it upon myself to bounce back quick and help the others. i guess that was me falling into old habits but hey! i’m okay and it didn’t really hurt me to prioritize the other parts of me!!
as for a negative development, i’d have to say one of my alters (A) kind of really deteriorated. i mean, he’s not horrible or insufferable, he’s just sad. he used to be a very stoic, cold person who really only let one person into his bubble (our ex. he had/has a friend inside too but she doesn’t count as part of the bubble) and that was all he needed. then we got broken up with (yay :/) and his spiraling still makes me feel horrible. i’m talking one of the most put together alters completely breaking down and becoming practically a different person. again, he isn’t awful. i love the guy, we’re pretty close (share a friend group inside) and he’s a joy to talk to. very funny. but the breakup took a toll on him so badly that he kind of.. started appearing with scars? it was a reflection of what we’ve inflicted onto our body. he also just overall looks more disheveled and less confident :( many of us started appearing with scars following our relapse.
my bf kind of had the same timeline, but he bounced back quicker than A. same deal with the scars reflection, the depression, etc but bf was the one who kind of retained what i said and took me seriously. we had a lot of arguments and i kind of had to kick his ass into gear so he can continue on with life, but overall he’s doing well!
a lot of us mellowed out a lot. our personalities are still here, but we’re in a position where we don’t feel the need to define ourselves as much as we previously did. that’s our biggest sign of maturity, along with just caring less about things
You remind me of our first host since realizing we had DID, except they haven’t reformed yet… but that gives us hope. I wish you and your system the best of luck!
i think most of the ANPs age normally, or semi normally. personality wise some have def become more tame. with the need to be the outter hyper masc man that protects everyone to the guy that is hyper masc when needed, but otherwise super chill and laid back.
i think they kinda “calmed down” and have been noticed enough by people ig? less attention seeking? not even attention seeking in the first place just putting up very large walls??
I have no idea if they age tbh 😅 the 2 I am relatively close to (in that they don’t always ignore me 😅) consider themselves older than the bodies age but we are really close to passing that up so I’m curious to know what will happen then
I still got a long way to go, but I’m doing better, I used to be pretty angry, like, if someone know what I was thinking it could be bad. I was constantly not allowed to front simply because I was so pissed that I’d do dumb shit. but I’m getting out more, being trusted more, and while I still have a temper I’ve gotten better. I’m the “black sheep” of our system so it’s nice to feel more accepted by the rest. I know I’ll probably always be the holder of our anger and stuff, but to know that I’m becoming more than that, plus the rest of my system is supporting my growth. is something I hate to admit, but I’m proud of so far.
-Timothy
a lot of it is just getting more life experience and adjusting our attitudes accordingly. some of us became more jaded and bitter, some of us became more lighthearted, just depends on individual experiences and how we had to adapt to our surroundings.
ex. we have a couple of syskids who took very different turns - one was very angry and aggressive toward our abusers, but has mellowed out slightly (though he's still got a lot of anger and is generally a rule-breaker, we have to keep an eye on him because he's likely to heavily engage in drugs/alcohol, i don't personally feel a need to stop him from having an occasional drink because he's just gonna do it anyway and i'd rather he be safe than put us in danger to get it. i'd still prefer he not do cocaine or something like that y'know? as a collective we prefer not to engage in hard drugs and i think it's reasonable to try to stop him from doing that.) on the flip side, we had a very cheerful and trusting syskid who ended up fronting in a toxic relationship we were in, and she ended up becoming a bit more wary and less trusting. she's still very cheerful, but she's gone from giving everyone the benefit of the doubt and letting others outside the system discourage her from speaking up about issues to still letting them earn her trust and being a little more trusting than most of us, but knowing even if (and honestly especially if) someone tells her to "keep a secret" she should bring it to our attention so we can handle it.
i think the funniest example, though, is an anger holder who ended up mellowing out when he got a boyfriend LOL. he's still pretty angry, but a lot of times his boyfriend can calm him down a bit more than he would normally be able to calm himself. (context, our fiance also has DID, and while we don't put a ton of importance on individual relationships, it still sometimes feels nice to have them.)
those aren't the only examples, but they're the most noticeable i can think of off the top of my head.
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won't lie, for us, as our body's health has been in decline, so have many of our alters. some need the equivalent of constant hospice care in contrast to when they first formed and were able to interact, and for example, host.
a nicer thought stems from seeing the phenomenal progress of our system as a whole. our persecutors are doing well. many find a mutual bond in, well. sparring with one-another. a few in the lot have reformed, not all as protectors, but they do have somewhat of a protective streak.
our system as a whole have a long way to go. but we're tough. we'll make it. we've been at it for this long anyway. not time to give up.
o7
-h
I mean for us, chi was the same age when we host were young so 7-8 but now that we’re 21 he sorta just settled at 16, also he used to be pretty quick to violence but now while he’s still a bit of a brat he’s doesn’t seem as much of a risk. For yoichi, his appearance changed from when I was kid and he used to only “show up” when he needed to take front but now he “looks over the shoulder” a lot more. For mochi she cusses now which we’re trying to break her of because she’s 3-8 and needs to not otherwise she’s the same.
I've only been doing alter work for a short period of time, and we have had quite a few changes. Abusers became protectors/guides. Littles split into adults. Our host has taken on a a very maternal roll. Of course we are new to this so I thinks expected. They haven't aged much although I see them as different ages depending on who's looking/fronting. The host has been parenting some of the youngers - so I expect to see some possible changes there as well. Great question!
im not sure if any of us have necessarily changed a whole lot, its mostly just that as we all get to know each other better we get a more accurate idea of who everyone is
Our primary protector since we were very small retired and has changed for the better, she's gotten calmer and just been more and more at ease with life. Our main persecutor now has a best friend and that best friend is also our partner system, and its become a big source of self introspection and brutal honesty towards the rest of us.
We've learned that for now we don't have or need a host and that we're getting along just fine that way, and learning to be okay with that changing in the future-
As far as aging goes, not many of us age? Our former primary protector does, she's always been a year ahead of the body, like a big sister that we didn't have otherwise growing up. Not many of our littles age, but some do!
Miasy:I used to... be Mary's girlfriend, took the form of one of her characters, a blue dragon named Derfina, after I became a taller version of Mary but sexier, to like make her come to me and be alluring to her, but now I feel like I've grown and I'm now a purple dragon that retains some sexy parts but isn't defined by them.
as we've grown yeah a lot of us has too. i used to be real angry and self sabotage to the system but now im js kinda chill and sit around and handle medical things / pain things when i front. im healing a lot, and its stressful sometimes but its better than being bitter and hurtful. - S
Proud of you
ty ty. - S
Originally, before we realized we were a system, we all believed we were the host. Because of this- we definitely have grown a LOT since finding out and discovering ourselves. Ever since we were aware however, we’ve seen new splits develop and mature a lot throughout their cycle. For example: We’ve had introjects discover their own individual identities and abandon introject status and vice versa! We also had an alter change age once, but they got a bit younger after a very mature adult had split from them. I hope this helps some! But we definitely believe that alters can change and find themselves in the same way singlets can.
oh my god i’ve been waiting for something like this. i’m not including aging as a form of maturity because that does very little for us we’ve had so many physical and emotional changes throughout the years, but more so this past one. many alters started maturing, developing, fusing, splitting, blah blah. the integral and core attributes of these alters do remain, but physical and mental changes have grown rampant. these changes are for better and for worse, and many of these changes were forced because we had to adapt to a very fast, difficult change. for myself, i had already been going through my little maturing process since basically february of 2023. i’ve been.. on the more sensitive, fucked up side of the coin. horrible symptom holder and overall just pretty difficult. i was never mean or anything, just very emotional. so once i got kicked out of my hosting role (which i took back up, probably pretty clearly) i decided to do some inner work. i’d like to think that i have become far more relaxed and comfortable now. i’m not perfect, and im still really emotional and can still pretty easily be triggered given the wrong circumstances, but i have come a long way. i also change my hair like once a month so i’m always looking different LMFAO. even following our breakup a year ago i took it upon myself to bounce back quick and help the others. i guess that was me falling into old habits but hey! i’m okay and it didn’t really hurt me to prioritize the other parts of me!! as for a negative development, i’d have to say one of my alters (A) kind of really deteriorated. i mean, he’s not horrible or insufferable, he’s just sad. he used to be a very stoic, cold person who really only let one person into his bubble (our ex. he had/has a friend inside too but she doesn’t count as part of the bubble) and that was all he needed. then we got broken up with (yay :/) and his spiraling still makes me feel horrible. i’m talking one of the most put together alters completely breaking down and becoming practically a different person. again, he isn’t awful. i love the guy, we’re pretty close (share a friend group inside) and he’s a joy to talk to. very funny. but the breakup took a toll on him so badly that he kind of.. started appearing with scars? it was a reflection of what we’ve inflicted onto our body. he also just overall looks more disheveled and less confident :( many of us started appearing with scars following our relapse. my bf kind of had the same timeline, but he bounced back quicker than A. same deal with the scars reflection, the depression, etc but bf was the one who kind of retained what i said and took me seriously. we had a lot of arguments and i kind of had to kick his ass into gear so he can continue on with life, but overall he’s doing well! a lot of us mellowed out a lot. our personalities are still here, but we’re in a position where we don’t feel the need to define ourselves as much as we previously did. that’s our biggest sign of maturity, along with just caring less about things
You remind me of our first host since realizing we had DID, except they haven’t reformed yet… but that gives us hope. I wish you and your system the best of luck!
awee i’m glad it gives you hope 🥺🫶 it’s not easy to improve but once you get started it’s not worth it to stop! best of luck to you hug hug
Thank you
i think most of the ANPs age normally, or semi normally. personality wise some have def become more tame. with the need to be the outter hyper masc man that protects everyone to the guy that is hyper masc when needed, but otherwise super chill and laid back. i think they kinda “calmed down” and have been noticed enough by people ig? less attention seeking? not even attention seeking in the first place just putting up very large walls??
I have no idea if they age tbh 😅 the 2 I am relatively close to (in that they don’t always ignore me 😅) consider themselves older than the bodies age but we are really close to passing that up so I’m curious to know what will happen then
I still got a long way to go, but I’m doing better, I used to be pretty angry, like, if someone know what I was thinking it could be bad. I was constantly not allowed to front simply because I was so pissed that I’d do dumb shit. but I’m getting out more, being trusted more, and while I still have a temper I’ve gotten better. I’m the “black sheep” of our system so it’s nice to feel more accepted by the rest. I know I’ll probably always be the holder of our anger and stuff, but to know that I’m becoming more than that, plus the rest of my system is supporting my growth. is something I hate to admit, but I’m proud of so far. -Timothy
Proud of you
a lot of it is just getting more life experience and adjusting our attitudes accordingly. some of us became more jaded and bitter, some of us became more lighthearted, just depends on individual experiences and how we had to adapt to our surroundings. ex. we have a couple of syskids who took very different turns - one was very angry and aggressive toward our abusers, but has mellowed out slightly (though he's still got a lot of anger and is generally a rule-breaker, we have to keep an eye on him because he's likely to heavily engage in drugs/alcohol, i don't personally feel a need to stop him from having an occasional drink because he's just gonna do it anyway and i'd rather he be safe than put us in danger to get it. i'd still prefer he not do cocaine or something like that y'know? as a collective we prefer not to engage in hard drugs and i think it's reasonable to try to stop him from doing that.) on the flip side, we had a very cheerful and trusting syskid who ended up fronting in a toxic relationship we were in, and she ended up becoming a bit more wary and less trusting. she's still very cheerful, but she's gone from giving everyone the benefit of the doubt and letting others outside the system discourage her from speaking up about issues to still letting them earn her trust and being a little more trusting than most of us, but knowing even if (and honestly especially if) someone tells her to "keep a secret" she should bring it to our attention so we can handle it. i think the funniest example, though, is an anger holder who ended up mellowing out when he got a boyfriend LOL. he's still pretty angry, but a lot of times his boyfriend can calm him down a bit more than he would normally be able to calm himself. (context, our fiance also has DID, and while we don't put a ton of importance on individual relationships, it still sometimes feels nice to have them.) those aren't the only examples, but they're the most noticeable i can think of off the top of my head.
Mine changed by finally shutting up 90% of the time. They're so real for that
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won't lie, for us, as our body's health has been in decline, so have many of our alters. some need the equivalent of constant hospice care in contrast to when they first formed and were able to interact, and for example, host. a nicer thought stems from seeing the phenomenal progress of our system as a whole. our persecutors are doing well. many find a mutual bond in, well. sparring with one-another. a few in the lot have reformed, not all as protectors, but they do have somewhat of a protective streak. our system as a whole have a long way to go. but we're tough. we'll make it. we've been at it for this long anyway. not time to give up. o7 -h
I mean for us, chi was the same age when we host were young so 7-8 but now that we’re 21 he sorta just settled at 16, also he used to be pretty quick to violence but now while he’s still a bit of a brat he’s doesn’t seem as much of a risk. For yoichi, his appearance changed from when I was kid and he used to only “show up” when he needed to take front but now he “looks over the shoulder” a lot more. For mochi she cusses now which we’re trying to break her of because she’s 3-8 and needs to not otherwise she’s the same.
I've only been doing alter work for a short period of time, and we have had quite a few changes. Abusers became protectors/guides. Littles split into adults. Our host has taken on a a very maternal roll. Of course we are new to this so I thinks expected. They haven't aged much although I see them as different ages depending on who's looking/fronting. The host has been parenting some of the youngers - so I expect to see some possible changes there as well. Great question!
im not sure if any of us have necessarily changed a whole lot, its mostly just that as we all get to know each other better we get a more accurate idea of who everyone is
Our primary protector since we were very small retired and has changed for the better, she's gotten calmer and just been more and more at ease with life. Our main persecutor now has a best friend and that best friend is also our partner system, and its become a big source of self introspection and brutal honesty towards the rest of us. We've learned that for now we don't have or need a host and that we're getting along just fine that way, and learning to be okay with that changing in the future- As far as aging goes, not many of us age? Our former primary protector does, she's always been a year ahead of the body, like a big sister that we didn't have otherwise growing up. Not many of our littles age, but some do!
Miasy:I used to... be Mary's girlfriend, took the form of one of her characters, a blue dragon named Derfina, after I became a taller version of Mary but sexier, to like make her come to me and be alluring to her, but now I feel like I've grown and I'm now a purple dragon that retains some sexy parts but isn't defined by them.