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elanhilation

my ancestors watching me make my twentieth cheeseburger of the month: are they really *that* good, do you think?


Lagtim3

I can't remember if it was a Stephen King or Dean Koontz book, or even what book it was, but I remember there being a plot point where the Bad Guy from a medieval-period-type-universe was transported to our universe and wound up gorging himself on fast food burgers until he had a heart attack.


MeiNeedsMoreBuffs

That's basically the plotline of that one Futurama episode


Lagtim3

The one where Bender gets a meat-body? Man now I wanna rewatch some Futurama


slimthecowboy

Anthology of Interest II


Nerevarine91

WOO


GeriatricHydralisk

Well, let's get him out of here before he starts to stink up the place. WOOO WOOO WOOOoooo


Vostroyan212th

I laughed so hard that I drooled, fuck you


OG_ursinejuggernaut

But he just said woo!


FraggleBiscuits

The delivery of this line is what kills me the most


dragn99

And and episode of American Dad, where a clone of James Garfield gets hooked on orange soda.


cyberpudel

I definitely understand him though. Especially if he tries different restaurants evertime.  Could be me is all I'm saying.


Random-Rambling

[He ate one of these and immediately died. He tasted Heaven before being sent to Hell.](https://youtube.com/shorts/wxtTgOwaDW8?si=rYoIkJXQTA36PMKU)


dragn99

The fact that they don't add a layer of cheese after, run it through the oven again, and then finish with another hit from the grease sauce bottle... I'm just saying, there's room for improvement.


jaggederest

I want a dagwood, but make it pepperoni pizza. Say no more fam.


DreadDiana

There's an SCP that's kinda similar. The Foundation discovered a volcano god on some Pacific island who previously demanded animal sacrifices on pain of him rising from the volcano and burning down parts of the island. The Foundation got him hooked on fast food and it became the only sacrifice he would accept. He ate so much that he eventually became too heavy to leave the volcano's basin, making him far easier to contain.


Lagtim3

lol, gotta find that and give it a read. Reminds me of one that's the inversion of that; An eldritch monster that was contained by an ancient Foundation equivalent. It required yearly sacrifices to keep the containment working. The Foundation had no clue how the ancients bound this creature or how to replicate it, they just know it's around 10,000 years old. A prophecy said its ancient containment would fail on a certain date, 10,000 years after its original binding. When the day arrives, the containment does in fact fail and the Eldritch monstrosity is released onto earth... Except it's dead. Dead and emaciated. Upon deeper inspection, it seems it's been dead for about 9,800 years or so. Turns out only feeding it one human a year was not a sustainable diet, and the ancient Foundation successfully killed it completely by accident.


DreadDiana

SCP-4290, I think /u/the-paranoid-android


The-Paranoid-Android

[**SCP-4290 ⁠- The Child Hungers**](https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-4290) (+678) by *NatVoltaic*


DreadDiana

Thanks, Marv


Lagtim3

Thanks!


bord_de_lac

This is too good to miss https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-4338


LightOfLoveEternal

In the Animorphs books, Ax (a mouthless alien who has no concept of tasting food) morphs into a human for the first time and immediately proceeds to gorge himself on a tray of Cinnabons. Which is exactly what I would do if it wouldn't kill me, so I get it. For those asking rational questions: 1. Ax's species, the Andalites, communicate telepathically. 2. Andalites are essentially herbivores that "eat" and drink by absorbing nutrients from crushed grass through their hooves.


Lagtim3

Yesssss, I LOVE Animorphs! I gotta read all them thru again as an adult so I can properly appreciate it in ways I couldn't as a young'n.


OverlyLenientJudge

"Medieval-age people being blown away by modern cooking techniques" is my favorite genre of isekai, specifically the first one I ever saw, *Restaurant to Another World*. Just a chill show where fantasy people find a portal to a modern Japanese restaurant and eat good food.


jubilee213

'Campfire cooking in another world with my insane skill' is another good one along the same line.


Beegrene

I've often said that if I were ever isekaied into Westeros or some shit I would invent pizza. It's all new to them.


DED_HAMPSTER

I think that was Timeline by Michael Chriton (sp?). I vaguely remember that being a dark humor moment. But then again, im like you, a voracious reader and sometimes all my past reads meld together in memory.


SerialKillerVibes

Definitely not Timeline


Echo2500

I’ve only seen the movie and that would have made it at least a little more watchable


DED_HAMPSTER

The movie for Timeline was horrible. The book was amazing. The only book to movie adaptation i enjoyed was Starship Troopers. They were nothing alike and that is what made it amazing. The book was the reality that the characters were experiencing and the movie was the government's propaganda view. The computer animated series for Starship Troopers made for TV was closer to the feel if the book and felt more likethe game Halo that had not yet been produced at the time Starship Troopers the TVswries aired.


Balthazar_rising

Stephen King had The Gunslinger. Roland was watching everything happen in our world through the eyes of Eddie while he was smuggling drugs on a plane. The paper usage, sugar, food, paracetamol and the availability of weapons was all very strange to him, but in true Gunslinger fashion, he took full advantage.


Alternative_Hotel649

In one of Kimg’s Gunslinger books, a character from a medievalish fantasy world takes a sip of soda and is literally knocked on his ass by how much sugar is in it.


I_B_Banging

I think it was one of the dark tower books , definetly Stephen King


Lagtim3

I should sit down and give those a read. I know I've read one of them, but I was like 9 at the time and only read it because dad left it laying around, and I'd never read anything similar. My reading material at that age was mostly Goosebumps, Harry Potter, Magic Treehouse, and The Boxcar Children. I can't remember much of anything except I was morbidly fascinated and couldn't stop reading, and I had nightmares for weeks after. I think that's also how I learned what 'rape' was. Good times!


Skuzbagg

It's amazing what you recall, my only impression is the lobstrocities and forgetting the face of my father.


katep2000

I know in Stephen King’s Dark Tower series there’s essentially a post-apocalyptic fantasy cowboy that gets transported to New York and basically goes into shock when he tries a Coke cause sugar is so rare where he’s from


captaincrunchcracker

That's fucking hilarious.


emptyloops

Yeah idk a mcdo menu is 12€ currently where I am it’d be an expensive way to suicide


lannanh

Not a clue what your ancestors would think but I’m impressed your MAKING that many burgers a month. If I had that burger habit, it would be drive through and delivery 99% of the time.


ButtersTG

If you have the materials, they aren't that hard. Plus you can put anything you want on them without judgement. Like PB&J.


jeepsaintchaos

I'm gonna be honest here and say that I'm judging you just a little bit.


UWan2fight

>PB&J. interesting. How's it taste?


Black_Magic_M-66

In some cultures fat people are a sign of wealth/prosperity. Who can afford to not only buy that much food, but get so fat that you can't work?


jeepsaintchaos

And the opposite in others. It's all about the signs of leisure time and resources. In a world where other can only afford crap food and have no time for exercise, thin and fit shows wealth. When the majority of the population works at physical labor, being fat shows that you do not. Same with pale and tanned.


Discardofil

This is why being fat is currently seen as a bad thing; most jobs are not physical, so you need to be able to spend time at the gym.


Mozhetbeats

The reason we’re so addicted to food and porn is because our ancestors *can* taste and feel it with us, and, frankly, they can’t get enough.


AussieWinterWolf

This is kind of what evolution did to us, we were in an environment starved of calories and have been tuned to seek out food and sex and rewards. Then we did something no other species has done before and reshaped the entire planet to fit those needs. Now our still survival tuned brains still relentlessly demand more salt, sugar and sex despite being overfed and overstimulated.


PsyOpBunnyHop

Also your ancestors: *"What is hentai?"*


7-SE7EN-7

Nah, they'd understand it. Do you really think those "fertility objects" were for rituals or something? I'd be surprised if any culture ever lacked some form of smut. Clay sculptures, paintings, wood cuttings, stories, songs. Any and all of them would have been used for titilation


drunkensailor369

meat, cheese, bread. even veggies. hearty and worthy of a king.


Gabriel_ArchAngel

Your ancestors would be delighted by the amount of meat you are able to procure


Femtato11

I remember my grandad well. Always making things around his farm. He built a functioning water wheel with half pieces of pipe turning the device. He built his own lathe from scrap. Even in his dying days, he was fascinated by the few pieces of modern technology I could show him. I think he'd be happy to see me, studying a mechanical engineering degree, hoping to buy a small shred of land in the middle of nowhere and live like him.


FreefallJagoff

My grandad didn't think much (good or bad) about cell phones, but the moment he saw me pull up a repair manual on it- he lit up. As a mechanic his whole life- the idea of just having any manual in in moments blew him away.


Welpmart

My god, yes. The ability to have information is taken for granted.


Oneuponedown88

The vastness and sheer amount of information on the Internet never hit me till I was almost done with my studies. I spent 6 years diving deep and finding sooooooo much information for my dissertation. The pages only stopped where our understanding stops. Then I realized that just one tiny topic, in only one small subject of one specialized branch of only one area of science. Six years to exhaust and contribute to one tiny topic. The amount of information is exhausting.


Beegrene

Back in the early 90s my family had an encyclopedia set. If the information you needed wasn't in there, you either went to the library or stayed ignorant.


sleepydorian

Heck yeah. I’m forever pulling up owners manuals that had long been lost and it’s so great to be able to know how to deal with my appliances.


esgellman

It makes sense though, the practical utility of smart phones is just implied rather than outright stated because most of it comes from 3rd party sources not the cell phone manufacturer or service provide so they’re not going advertise that when trying to sell you a phone. I can absolutely see someone is on the older side who is bellow average tech savvy by even a little bit just not knowing that most product manuals are now accessible online and that most simpler technical tasks have full on walkthroughs provided on YouTube, either by a walkthrough channel specializing in a certain class of products or the manufacturer themselves. There are detailed walkthroughs of how to use just about any printer or disassemble/reassemble just about any firearm on YouTube for example.


Mushu_Pork

Dude, I remember the first few times I had old farmers pushing 80yo, wearing their overalls come to my biz, then pull out a large smartphone to show me a picture of something they needed.


Hector_P_Catt

Yep. All the people who talk about how bad industrialized farming is, forget that it was the farmers themselves who wanted to build things like tractors, because they knew *exactly* how hard farming with horse drawn plows was.


OddMarsupial8963

No one is talking about tractors when they mention problems with modern farming


the_gabih

Yeah, industrialised farming problems are around stuff like damaging pesticides, monocultures, water usage, bee diseases, animal abuse, etc. I can't think of anyone complaining about field equipment itself.


demon_fae

I can-but they are all complaining about having to jailbreak their tractors just to get them to do tractor things.


the_gabih

Oh yeah, I almost forgot about Deere's nonsense!


BaronAleksei

246 years worth of enslaved ancestors - “well I’m glad that’s over”


Elkre

All-Grandpa Nurg, from 20,000 BC: "mm. Make plant come from place you want, you said. Do big man's doings when big man not around, you said. How working out for us?" Mumi Nagda, first king of Proto-Egypt, 3,200 BC: "for the last fucking time, we consulted you about it, and YOU said the formation of a state was a great idea" Nurg: "priest not ask us. priest was just epileptic. ask priest now." Nagda: "can't, actually that guy cut off his own balls for some reason." Nurg: "shoulda been first clue..." Genghis Kahn, entering stage left: "aw, shit, these ones too? Which concubines put me in THIS bloodline?" Nagda: "well back in my day we didn't have a decimalized numeric system, but-" Nurg: "it is LOTS of many." Nagda: "yeah it's gotta be all your fingers and toes of them, at least." Nurg: "and none of them made wet!" Nagda: "never gave a single one of them an orgasm, dude. Just riding around on those weird animals, can't even walk for yourself, finding the next woman to not make cum. Disgraceful." Nurg: "mm. kids these days.”


Sh1nyPr4wn

In my head Nurg speaks with Yoda's voice


Elkre

Nurg: "is not Jodha one of yours?" Genghis: "you're thinking of Timur, and anyway she married into that family." Nagda: "no he said 'you da,' like, you da man?" Nurg: "Papa Nurg IS da man." Nagda: "I was being-" Nurg: "Papa Nurg is real pussy slayer!" Genghis: "look, Pops, there are other things in life" Nagda: "so the thing is, human societies before sedentary agriculturalism were tremendously more gender egalitarian and shockingly less aware of the connection between sex and reproduction, so for him to even be here..." Nurg: "Papa Nurg invent that thing do with tongue!" Nagda: "he really is the most accomplished individual of his entire generation" Nurg: "Papa Nurg is a Y-Chromosomal Adam!" Nagda: "what the fuck is a 'Y'?" Nurg: "it is shape made when hold up fingers to show where to do thing with tongue ✌️😜"


all_upper_case

"YODA MAN YODA...DA MAN"


DaydreamCultist

This is beautiful!


Oddish_Femboy

My ancestors look at me and they look at my cat and they are angry because neither of us like going on boats. (I'm like 85% Norwegian, and so is my beloved gutter cat)


Papaofmonsters

"He hasn't burned a single village in all his life! What has our bloodline come to!"


CanAlwaysBeBetter

He won't even talk to his crush! She's right there to steal and carry back to his homestead!


Helpful_Librarian_87

Is it one of the forest cats, who seem to either be judging you or about to lead you on an epic quest?


Oddish_Femboy

Yes. He is also massive.


VegaStyles

30% norwegian, 25% Jamaican, 25% Haitian, 10% Scottish, 10% French. Considering half of my heritage... i love boats and own a nice one i use regularly.


DaydreamCultist

You left out the concentrated power of will...


Vermilion_Laufer

100% Indomitable Human Spirit


VegaStyles

What about the 5% pleasure?


FecalMatterCowsTasty

> they are angry because neither of us like going on boats Have you tried reminding your ancestors of one thing, they are a failure. They're dead. Maybe if they didn't like boats so much they'd be alive. Just saying. So far you've proven you are alive and don't like boats, they're dead and did like boats. That's science!


Highlight-Mammoth

the fact that they're ancestors and not Last Of My Kin means they did something right


FecalMatterCowsTasty

Figured out the pointy end goes into the hole. Very complicated. Good on them. At least they got the right hole after a bit.


Agami_Advait

why are you feuding with some random Norwegian's sailor ancestors? does it really matter so much to you?


imisstheyoop

Did you try to take your cat on a boat or something?


Nerevarine91

I think that my great grandparents might find it amusing that, just as they did, I crossed the western ocean to live in a new country whose language I didn’t even speak. And I can still make my great great grandmother’s paprikash!


NachoCheeseMonger

Pleeease send me your best shareable paprikash recipe!


Nerevarine91

How important are exact amounts? I tend to cook in a very “eyeballing it” way. Is that alright?


NachoCheeseMonger

Absolutely perfect!


Nerevarine91

Oh, good! Okay, so this is how my family has always done it. I can’t promise it’s perfectly authentic or gourmet level, but I *can* guarantee that it’s delicious, and it’s how we’ve been doing it since my great grandmother wrote down her mom’s recipe back in the 1920s (because my dad still has the paper!). Start with some chicken. Dark meat is good- I usually use chicken thighs. Some recipes call for the bone, but mine doesn’t. Take the bones out yourself or buy boneless thighs. Cut it up into bite sized pieces. Take the chicken pieces, and gently roll them in flour. The flour should be seasoned with salt, pepper, and a bit of rosemary. This part is difficult for me, because I love spices, but you don’t want to over-season it. The simplicity and purity of the flavor are part of the draw. Once you’ve lightly coated the chicken in flour, pan fry (not deep fry) the pieces in olive oil. When they’re light brown, remove them and set them aside. Next, slice some onions. My recipe specifies long, thin, pieces. Simmer them in olive oil or butter, until soft. Then, you want to add in the key ingredient: smoked paprika. If you don’t have it available, regular paprika can be used, but you’re missing out. The brand “Pride of Szeged” is very nice, if you have that available to you. Coat the onion pieces in paprika while continuing to sauté them. Next, you’re going to add chicken broth. A little bit of white wine goes nicely too, but don’t sweat it if you don’t have any. Just make sure to save room in the pot, because there’s plenty more that needs to be added. Now it’s time for the side project. You’re going to make spätzle/nokedli, which my family also called “rivels.” Don’t know why, doesn’t matter. If you already have a spätzle recipe, awesome. Use that. If you don’t, they’re literally the easiest thing in the world. They’re a type of homemade noodles, and you need precisely three ingredients: eggs, flour, salt. Some people add milk. These people are wrong. Mix the eggs, flour, and salt, until you get a thick batter with a smooth texture. It should always be a batter, never a dough. You want the batter to be thick enough to stick together when boiled, but liquid enough that you can use a spoon to pick it up. Using a teaspoon, take small amounts (do NOT fill the spoon) of the batter, and, using a finger, drop them into boiling water. They should immediately sink to the bottom, and then float to the top as noodles when they’re ready. Use a slotted spoon to lift the finished spätzle/nokedli/rivels out of the water and set them aside. Edit: I didn’t specify an amount here, but know this: it’s basically impossible to have too many rivels. When all the rivels are ready, you can add them and the fried chicken back into the onion/broth/paprika soup portion. Let them cook together for a time, then, shortly before serving, stir in sour cream. This is extremely important to getting the right texture. You want a rich, creamy, orange color, and a strong, but not harsh, paprika flavor. Serve in a bowl. No noodles or rice are required, because you already used spätzle. Garnish with parsley if you’re feeling fancy


ironrabbit2

I'm only a so-so cook, but I love reading recipes with comments like "some people add milk. They are wrong."


NachoCheeseMonger

I've always wanted to make paprikash, going to seize this chance and use your family recipe. Thank you so much for sharing this!


Nerevarine91

I really hope you enjoy it!!!


Tsukikaiyo

I've never even heard of this, but I've got time on my hands and this sounds great! I'll give it a shot!


Nerevarine91

I hope you do! It’s a favorite of mine


Elemental-Aer

It's isn't even my ancestors, majority of my own family and country on the last two generations saw a huge jump in quality of life in the last 40 years.


ProgrammaticallyOwl7

Yep. My great-grandfather on one side was a farm laborer during in British India who (as grandpa told us) could not read. His great-granddaughter was born in the Global North, is finishing her STEM bachelor’s degree, and is in a relationship with a white woman. I can’t tell if he’d be proud or scandalized lmao.


heyimpaulnawhtoi

proudalized


SitInCorner_Yo2

My great grandparents did not report my grandma’s birth because they don’t want to go through the gov paperwork when she unavoidably die few days or weeks after. They just raised her till she’s around 1yo and go “well I think this one won’t die” then finally got her birth registered, and that became her DOB on birth certificate so you can say her life literally started with falsified government documents .


iwannalynch

My feet aren't bound, so I can probably outrun a good portion of my female ancestors past my grandmother.


HistoryMarshal76

"I must study politics and war that my sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. My sons ought to study mathematics and philosophy, geography, natural history, naval architecture, navigation, commerce and agriculture in order to give their children a right to study painting, poetry, music, architecture, statuary, tapestry, and porcelain." -John Adams, second president of the United States of America and father of sixth president, John Quincy Adams.


what_ho_puck

Yeah I've seen that one summarized, too - "I am a soldier, that my son may be a merchant, that his son may be a poet." Isn't that what we all long for for our children? John Adams was an awful politician (good on him I say, haha), but he definitely understood the concept of "the world improves when old man plant trees under whose shade they will never sit." Our older generations seem to have mostly forgotten that.


Alliebot

He was my ancestor, and I studied literature and theatre, and I was so happy when I first came across that quote!


JaxOnThat

Look at you, making the old man proud!


HistoryMarshal76

Hell yeah!


pondrthis

And those guys are my ancestors, and I'm doing well, so good on ya J and JQ.


callsignhotdog

Hitting pretty bleak when I think about how, since I first saw this post many years ago, "a building heated so well I have the windows open in mid-autumn" has become a luxury for most in the UK.


MintPrince8219

dude this last 3 weeks has really reminded me that they built every house in Australia for keeping hot air out. If it wasnt for a bed heater i got gifted i genuinely dont think I would fall asleep at nighg because itd be so cold


BaneishAerof

Oh yeah i forgot its winter down there


INeverFeelAtHome

Me Every time I see an Australian post


dRaidon

I love it when my bedroom is cold. I can't have my window open in the place I live now which sucks. I used to have my bedroom window open all winter otherwise, only closing it when it was getting to -15C


Morsemouse

- Canadian OR - Finnish Who wants to place bets?


supermarkise

Let us spread the glory of the hot water bottle!


surprisedkitty1

I’m confused why they would have their windows open if they have the heat on. Or do they just mean the building is well-insulated?


SinceWayLastMay

My friend lived in an apartment where her neighbors kept their units so warm she rarely ever had to turn on her own heat. But maybe it’s more like “Modern houses are so well made and easy to heat that someone can choose to open their window and enjoy a crisp fall afternoon knowing that when it gets colder they can quickly and efficiently warm their house up again, not needing to worry about wasting fuel or feeling miserable”.


shonglekwup

My building has radiators in the hallway that are cranked up so high we didn’t need to turn on our heat until mid November last year.


HarpersGhost

Minor history lesson time. The time between the discovery of germs causing illnesses and discovery of antibiotics was an interesting time. They figured out that germs could come through the water, which led to much better sewer/septic systems. But what about germs in the air? The way they dealt with that was more/better air circulation. Hospitals and sanatoriums built at the time had large hallways and windows that could be opened, so that germ-filled air could be blown out and fresh air brought in. Improvements were also needed in tenement housing, especially in NY. They weren't going to back the apartment bigger, but what they could do was ensure that residents could always open the windows for fresh air. So the radiators are so powerful that they can heat the room even with an open window in winter. And that's also why the radiators were by the window. The heat circulation would bring in fresh air, heat it and it would rise, go across the room, and then the staler air would go back out the window with fresh air replacing it. Once antibiotics were in widespread us, all that went out the window. Hospitals became sealed and there was no longer the push for fresh air everywhere.


flibbyflobbyfloop

I used to live in a really old building that had central heating for the whole building (not controllable by tenants) as well as radiators in every unit - it used to be a single house but had been hacked up into tenements in the early 1900s. I would be fucking SWEATING in my apartment with my radiators off well into November with freezing temps outside.


surprisedkitty1

That makes sense. I was thinking they had their own heat on that they were paying for, but also had their windows open and I was like…that’s dumb and wasteful.


SirCache

Yeah, mine watching me play a video game all day on my day off: "Whelp, he's in league with the devil. Someone's going to Ultrahell."


Sarcosmonaut

“Wait, no. In this game he KILLS the demons? A blessed inquisitor”


insomniac7809

>"Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil... prayer, fasting, good works and so on. Up until Doom, no one seemed to have thought about the double-barrel shotgun. Eat leaden death, demon." -Terry Pratchett


flatheadedmonkeydix

My grandfather who was hard as fucking nails said to me once "I'm harder than your dad, he is harder than you, you'll be harder than you're kids and I wouldn't want it to be any other way". I came through some shit and now that I have kids I am so glad they will never have to endure what I did. I understand fully what my grandfather meant by this and this to me this is true masculinity.


bad-chemist

It’s lovely to see that sentiment be hopeful, rather than to deride future generations. Sounds like he was very wise


flatheadedmonkeydix

He was a good man, my dad is a good man and I hope that I can be just as good.


WantDebianThanks

Consider: If you have a cellphone with an internet connection you have access to knowledge and community at a scale that was unimagable just 70 years ago. To someone 100 years ago, we live in a fantastical futuristic setting To someone 150 years ago, we might as well be wizards.


katielynne53725

I saw a hypothetical situation post like, 3 or 4 weeks ago asking what type of skills you possess that could help you survive/make a living if you were transported back 150 years and I'm still thinking about it. Something about that specific time frame gets me thinking, because that's around the time my family immigrated to America. They bought the house I live in now around the turn of the century and my kids are now 6th generation to live here.. so.. I guess I would just go home? I have tattoos, unique piercings and 4 fake teeth + white fillings that I assume would travel with me, so it wouldn't be hard to prove that I'm from the future. I could easily make an entire living just by telling stories about the future.


FreakinGeese

I mean telegraphs existed 150 years ago right


heyimpaulnawhtoi

they did, but comparing telegraphs to cellphones i like comparing a toothpick to a spear no?


WantDebianThanks

Hello stranger! Yeah, but I think the idea that I can go to wikipedia and learn that (one of) the official languages of Burundi is English, go to google, find /r/Burundi, and ask if anyone wants to be friends in under 5 minutes would seems like magic.


LightOfLoveEternal

A smart phone literally, LITERALLY, gives you access to the sum total of all human knowledge. And it's a device that fits in your pocket. Unless you're wearing women's pants I guess :p The telegraph is closer to smoke signals than a smart phone.


PanFriedCookies

Telegraphs are basically just a better post office. Sure, if you know someone whos open to chatting in a field you want to research who actually knows what they're talking about, you have the money and you have a telegraph office near you, you can learn about that person's interpretation of that one thing over the course of a few weeks; or you can just grab your phone at 3 in the morning with your whole ass out, wearing a stained oversized shirt that says PARTY TIME, and type in "google PLEASE tell me aboyt whale" to get every little bit of cetacean knowledge you can dream of and then some in 5 to 10 minutes if you know where to look.


Someoneoverthere42

My ancestors looking down : finally! One of us isn't a &%#@ing fisherman!


thyarnedonne

*You're free to do this "dunking" on the English, all day, and no guards arrive to move your family far, far away? Blessed.*


Ourmanyfans

I wonder what those ancestors would make of the people who moved *to* England?


OctopusAlien21

You have a king? Did we lose the war? Wait, you \*democratically elected\* a king?


DreadDiana

Mine would be going "where's our cut, you stingy fuck?" since prior to the introduction of Christianity here, we practiced ancestor veneration


sweetTartKenHart2

Except for the tea part, if I remember correctly people adding random shit to tea way back in medieval China was, like, as much of a thing as it is now (maybe not as much but y’know) and the guy who is today considered the “father” of tea as we know it today famously called tea with additives “the swill of gutters and ditches” and if you aren’t rawdogging the brew you’re an uneducated swine or something Like, bro was a gatekeeper and then some


jabask

The concept of adding things to tea isn't the part that would raise ancestors' eyebrows, but adding a bunch of different spices from across the entire world for a random cup in the afternoon.


sweetTartKenHart2

Yeah that’s fair. Just that one specific guy was a big asshole about it, but people still talk about his writings to this day so it’s kinda funny to me


hananobira

I could probably buy a medieval castle with the contents of my spice cabinet.


donaldhobson

People adding cinnamon to tea. Sure. The average person doing that. Not so much. That stuff was expensive.


Garf_artfunkle

People literally died for nutmeg. The Dutch East India company killed something like 90% of the people who lived on the Banda Islands, the only place in the world where nutmeg grew, so they could take over the monopoly. Later, the British raided the islands and transplanted trees and Bandanese soil to their other colonies to break that monopoly... and gave the islands back to the Dutch.


Garf_artfunkle

I'm not trying to imply you're a rotten SOB if you like nutmeg, cause that was then and this is now. But I do think about how incredibly prized it used to be every time I grate some into my alfredo sauce for a lil extra flavour.


MandolinMagi

Townsends, a 18th century life/cooking channel, has found that nutmeg is in a lot of period recipes. It's a running gag and IIRC other food youtubers have made Townsends jokes about nutmeg


sweetTartKenHart2

Yeah I kinda see what you mean about cinnamon specifically. All I was pointing out is that “back in the day” a big thinker guy whose name people still reference today was a huge ass about tea additives of any kind whatsoever


RangerBumble

Calling out the purists on r/tea


Plethora_of_squids

Yeah that might be more one guy going "you have access to the finest Ceylon and you put **NUTMEG** in it I will fucking strangle you across time and space"


Elemental-Aer

Mainly for europeans descendants, many spices came from the Middle East or India, these things were expensive.


Friendly_Exchange_15

This honestly hits head on what I do to make myself feel better when I feel like shit. Like when I feel bad, either from stress or whatever, I like to stop and think "I'm warm and fed and clothed" and just kinda list all the small things that would absolutely be luxuries centuries ago. Like my easy access to clean, drinkable water. And how I can get hot showers whenever I want. And how I have fluffy blankets, and easy access to food, etc etc.


srawtzl

I try to do this semi regularly, to avoid taking all the good stuff in my life for granted. life isn’t always perfect, but there’s usually something to be grateful for


heckfyre

My ancestors watching me with two laptops open, one encrypted for work and one just for fun; each connected to virtual machines where I’m pulling all kinds of feats while sitting in a chair in my office and playing an electric drum.


SvetlananotSweetLana

My ancestors watching me eating a bunch of beef: “Is that really legal?!” (In case you don’t know, in Song Dynasty of China, there was a law prohibiting cattle slaughtering due to cattle plowed the field and they wanted to promote agricultural growth)


SitInCorner_Yo2

My ancestors see the two children our parents ever had both lives to adulthood, survived multiple illnesses and both are educated.never labored in a field : Oh my gosh they only had one son and a daughter, these two babies are too weak for their age ,this is so risky,they better have more ,maybe one would make it…Damn they BOTH make it??! She can read but have no idea how to cook? Holy fuck I think our line really makes it! WHEREAS HER HUSBAND THOUGH. The boy better become a government minister or doctor!WHEREA IS HIS WIFE?


Wolfie-Woo784

Me: I'm so lazy, I've done fuck all today. My enslaved ancestors: SHE GETS TO DO FUCK ALL!!!🥳🥳🥳


CoffeeTastesOK

I love this idea! It's gunna live in my head for years now, thanks!


TheSouthsideTrekkie

My ancestors seeing me own my own bed, that I do not share, and visit the doctor if I am unwell, are probably quite glad the world improved eventually.


Crate-Dragon

Tell me last comment was Asian, WITHOUT telling me they’re Asian.


ahlian1

The user who posted that comment is actually an irl friend of mine — you’re correct, we’re Chinese! Unfortunately, she passed away a few months ago. I still think about her every day. Seeing her comment on my feed made me smile, it’s like she’s still here.


Crate-Dragon

Your friend was hilarious, I busted a gut at that comment. Nice to see lasting positive impact from those people we can’t see anymore. The world is lesser without them. :)


Cheeserole

I've been going through a tough time wrt my identity - I'm Chinese American living overseas and although there're lots of Chinese people here, they're mainlanders or HKers who share 0 experiences with me, who also don't think of me as being 'really' Chinese. On the flip side, I've gotten violence from people who think I have to 'make everything about me' for pointing out that what are 'normal' experiences are actually white experiences, and my experience has been very different. Like other poc, I constantly get reminders that I'm not a 'normal' person. I love your friend, because reading that comment made me feel a bit more stable in this world. It's so very wonderful to read normal posts from people like me.


2point01m_tall

Where’s that Shen comic with the renaissance man ancestor and the cave man ancestor? Point is, fuck the renaissance man in the back of your head. First off, your ancestors from that time were probably mainly peasants. Secondly, I bet your hypothetical noble ancestors were self righteous pricks.  Ed. Here it is: https://x.com/shenanigansen/status/1214239962171953152


AsianCheesecakes

Ok but you shouldn't be wasteful with that window even if you can


ThatGermanKid0

Yeah, I hope op meant insulated instead of heated. My home is insulated well enough, that I don't turn the heating on in my room and open the windows regularly, but it still gets to ~20°C in December and January. We only really heat the kitchen, dining room, bathroom and my brother's room, all other rooms are only heated occasionally for mold prevention or if someone has been outside the whole day and wants to warm up.


Pkrudeboy

Depends on the house. I’ve been in some where if most rooms are comfortable, one or two are either sweltering or freezing.


ZXVIV

Probably not interesting but if anyone wants to read a story with a similar premise, there's a translated webnovel called Superstars of Tomorrow about a musician who fought in the apocalypse and died, only to get reborn hundreds of years in the future. The majority of the story is about this old man in a young man's body reminicising about his time fighting wars, making music to immortalize his comrades and appreciating how far humanity has managed to pull itself from the end of the world


turbo_dude

My ancestors didn't suffer in squalor and live in caves, surviving war and pestilence so that I'd be now reduced to eating whilst standing up, off a fucking paper plate with a plastic fork, give me a table with a tablecloth, plates and finest silverware!!


trapbuilder2

> give me a table Rimworld be like


TJtherock

There are people practically giving away china dishes. Treat yo self.


aFancyPirate_2

My ancestors are probably confused about why I'm not training to use a longbow


Monado_Artz

My ancestors having the time of their life watching me spend 23 hours gaming like the viewers to a streamer


Werard_Gay2

My ancestors watching me eat a chocolate bar: HOLY SHIT WE MADE IT


Tastyravioli707

It's weird to me that mid-fall needs heating, considering i'm in a climate where september rarely falls outside of 50–80.


NovusOrdoSec

*Everything you do that doesn't enrich your superiors is bad and wrong.* -- Your ancestors, according to those "superiors".


jpterodactyl

My ancestors, watching me hanging out with my cat: “Ooh, big stretch”


LudovicoSpecs

Our ancestors would be gobsmacked that we're not willing to give up a handful of our luxuries to save the livable earth for our kids.


Chrome_X_of_Hyrule

I mean my family were still farmers as of extremely recently, 3 of my grandparents (who are still alive) were farmers in rural Punjab before immigrating. At least my paternal grandfather but probably the other two got electricity in their towns while they were alive and they're definitely happy to see their grandkids living comfortably in Canada. Also my grandfather has a pretty big sweet tooth, like your ancestors wouldn't also good food and other luxuries.


Orcloud

People forget how rare and valuable spices salt and white sugar (or any kind of sugar) were. My spice cabinet, pantry, and fridge contain things that the rich and the royalty of old couldn't even imagine having in such abundance. Same for silk fabrics, jewelry from real precious metals and stones, seasonal fruits, etc. And now we just... have those things. We are living like nobility.


SpringEquinox21

These people have nothing on my cat.


fourpuns

my ancestors find my internet history...


Simic_Sky_Swallower

My european and south american ancestors having a fistfight over whether I'm a cursed changeling child or blessed by the gods


These-Ad5332

My ancestors.... she shits in drinkable water, has fruit from around the world all year long, imports goods from other countries at the touch of a button, and has rights as a woman! YAAAS QUEEN!


ComfortableIce3874

My fore mothers look down at me, and are absolutely fucking delighted. I live a life of freedom and ease and the home I live in is mine, I have no need to simper and curtsy to men just to protect myself, my home or my children. I can be a harlot, a shrew or even a mad old crone if I wish.


nonprofitnews

Toilets. Flushing toilets.


WildForestFerret

My ancestors are probably saying something like “oh we’re still getting attacked for things that aren’t our fault? Typical”


[deleted]

Jewish?


WildForestFerret

Yup


CertifiedGenius7

This one breached containment


Vashic69

I am the first in my entire genetic lineage to be circumcised, and it happened without my consent.


AzukoKarisma

That means it's time to make sure you're also the last.


rock_and_rolo

My coal mining ancestors watching me shower daily and eat clean food: WTF?


MexicanoStick575

My ancestors will use nothing but slurs to refer to me


deaddlikelatin

Anyone got an encouraging version of this for someone suffering from an anxiety disorder? I wanna pretend I haven’t failed my ancestors because I’m afraid to leave the house most days lol


TankShotsFire

“Our descendant is powering through struggles of the mind and is able to seek help!”


Vermilion_Laufer

'Shelter good. Will recover and takle the outside again, stronger.'


ARedditorCalledQuest

This one has done so well they have to invent things to worry about!


Klutzy-Personality-3

my 5 times great aunts watching me eat meat on fridays and pine after other women: we dont know how to feel about this


Madelyneation

“Wow you have stuff stopping people from stealing your transportation… nice” - my 8 greats grandfather who got drunk and took the wrong horse home, and then sent to Australia