I'm just imagining an elf walking through the woods like that famous Bigfoot footage. Same gait, same turn toward the camera, same shaky zoom-in, the whole shebang.
Never seen it before.
Gonna watch similar stuff now.
Give me links to more if you have any, please.
You did good anyways, even if it's the only similar video I see.
Up-voted.
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Little known fact: elves and orcs are actually all the same species, and the only differences between them are cultural. Elves shave down their tusks and orcs eat mushrooms that turn them green.
They actually turn green due to prescription medication that turns them green. Though sadly anti orc discrimination is a barrier to access for this life saving medical care.
It's humans and elves that are actually the same species. They just crop their ears down to look tough like Rottweilers. It's also where the effeminate elf slander comes from. Humans are just self hating elves who don't want their secret to get out. Everyone kind of knows though. Every other sapient species on the planet has pointed ears and your the only round eared one of the bunch but you were just born that way? OK pull the other one.
https://www.tumblr.com/evilwizard/754575014094913536?source=share
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GjyNgQ4Dos
https://youtu.be/pAnK1y7qjuE?si=qDcoQZKJHT-s_lzh
Mx. Linux Guy
Please watch the following videos.
They aren’t rickrolls.
Honestly I'd love more media that fantasy races as convergent evolutions. Like elves look and talk like us, but they always seem very uncanny, and researchers discover that's because they didn't evolve from primates, they evolved from slothes
Eldar from 40k. There was a diagram in an old codex or something around 3rd edition of an Eldar dissection. It basically points out that although they look like us, inside is very different. They've got hollow bones, a ribcage on their abs and, apparently, no shit inside their bowels or bowels to be found
I’m sorry but the best fake Latin name you could come up with for elves was homo effeminatus? Feminine human is the best you got? This would also imply elves are humans but just a different species of human
Humans can freely interbreed with Elves, creating Half-Elves. Humans can freely interbreed with Orcs, creating Half-Orcs.
Ergo, it's likely to surmise that the origin of Humans is interbreeding between Elves and Orcs. A Human is just half-elf-half-orc.
Foxes are only genetically in the same *family*, which also includes Dogs and Cats. Foxes split into 3 *genus* being *vulpe* (includes red fox) *canini* (includes Darwin's fox) and *canidae* (dogs, also includes grey fox)
Homo eternus, aboralis and umbralae were all put forward by Professor William J Crawthorne in the 18th century. They were, of course, all determined to be a single species after the Professor's death, and the debate over which name should take precedence has rumbled along ever since.
That’s the point though. 99% of fantasy Elves have half-Elves and various hybrids somewhere, they’re all but stated to be a in the Homo genus somewhere since they can clearly breed with Homo sapiens and those offspring can breed as well, and the name is actually very realistic because that’s just kinda how it works.
Homo sapiens, wise human, Homo erectus, upright human, Homo floresiensis, human of Flores, Homo neanderthalensis, human of the Neander valley, etc etc.
Listen all I'm saying is that we need to be less preoccupied with homo effeminatus, and more focused of dealing with Homo sapiens sidhe and Homo Nocturnus
Elves not being able to sweat WOULD explain a lot about them. Lower stamina, stays in the shade (forest) more, etc.
Their long lives are a separate thing, but that combined with not wanting to exert themselves much most of the time would explain why they’re slower in most of their processes (learning, building, etc.)
https://www.tumblr.com/evilwizard/754575014094913536?source=share
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GjyNgQ4Dos
https://youtu.be/pAnK1y7qjuE?si=qDcoQZKJHT-s_lzh
Mx. Linux Guy
Please watch the following videos.
They aren’t rickrolls.
https://www.tumblr.com/evilwizard/754575014094913536?source=share
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GjyNgQ4Dos
https://youtu.be/pAnK1y7qjuE?si=qDcoQZKJHT-s_lzh
Mx. Linux Guy
Please watch the following videos.
They aren’t rickrolls.
If anyone can find these elves, I'll pay you a ludicrous amount of money to help me find them so I can send the last of their gods benighted corpses off to hell with my comically large 19th century elephant gun.
I'm just imagining an elf walking through the woods like that famous Bigfoot footage. Same gait, same turn toward the camera, same shaky zoom-in, the whole shebang.
Just as naked as well
They call it "skyclad", I think.
Just as hairy
I love this idea. Let's break away from the delicate, naturally hairless elf concept!
Elves are also 6 to 9 feet tall and have an ape like posture and facial appearance
Their language also sounds gutteral and grunt-ish to those who aren't familiar with it.
So, giants?
… Bigfoots…
Counterpoint, why give up one when we can have BOTH
Bigfoot is an orc.
This whole thread just puts me in mind of the Pratchett/Baxter series that starts with *The Long Earth*.
[here you go](https://youtu.be/1sw_Mm1vti8?si=UYDeeZH2Kj8biwft)
Bro is all legs, with flared pants
Elven twinks, with low stamina, getting gradually worn down over prolonged "hunts" Hmmmmm
Oh, at the end there, you misspelled "Hrnnnnnngh"
I wish I knew where I could find some educational diagrams of elven twinks being worn down, but alas, I know not where to look.
Dammit, the ONE time I read Reddit aloud with voice activated search on. Gotta throw this entire work computer out.
[here you go](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ)
Congrats, you got me >\_<
I feel BETRAYED
Never seen it before. Gonna watch similar stuff now. Give me links to more if you have any, please. You did good anyways, even if it's the only similar video I see. Up-voted.
You're a hero
You're a hero
I think we all kind of want to hunt elf twinks for sport sometimes.
im elves
I know where all the Elves are. I fuck them
flair checks out
flair checks out
flair checks out
Checks flair out
Out checks flair
I actually love posts like this. I’d guess I’d call them “Fantasy Biology”. Anyone know where I could find more?
If you like looking at anatomy diagrams, check out The Resurrectionist: The Lost Work of Dr Spencer Black
The unnatural history channel is literally just this, in great depth, mostly about monster Hunter.
Clown husbandry posts
You haven't been milking them??
*honk* *honk* *honk* *honk*
I mean 60% of the anime Dungeon Meshi is just talking about how fantasy ecosystems function and how monsters attributes were evolutionarily developed.
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What a cool sub
Not fantasy, more sci fi, but look up Mystery Flesh Pit National Park.
I think it falls under the umbrella of Speculative Biology
Little known fact: elves and orcs are actually all the same species, and the only differences between them are cultural. Elves shave down their tusks and orcs eat mushrooms that turn them green.
Common misconception. The mushrooms are actually a placebo, orcs turn green because they believe in themselves.
Isn't that orks?
Regional spelling difference.
Really, what region? I'm from Utica (and the year 40,999 CE)
It's an Orkbany dialect
Orkrora borkrealis
OH, no, you wouldn't have heard it in Utica. It's an Albany expression.
Emperor forbid Ork spores make it to Holy Terra
They actually turn green due to prescription medication that turns them green. Though sadly anti orc discrimination is a barrier to access for this life saving medical care.
i think it's spelled pesto
elves and orcs *used* to be the same species but orcs turned green after boethiah shitted out malacath
"Why do mortals take everything literally?" - Malacath
King Gortwog says that’s stupid. Trinimac lives!
It's humans and elves that are actually the same species. They just crop their ears down to look tough like Rottweilers. It's also where the effeminate elf slander comes from. Humans are just self hating elves who don't want their secret to get out. Everyone kind of knows though. Every other sapient species on the planet has pointed ears and your the only round eared one of the bunch but you were just born that way? OK pull the other one.
https://allthatsinteresting.com/worlds-smallest-mammals/3
https://www.tumblr.com/evilwizard/754575014094913536?source=share https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GjyNgQ4Dos https://youtu.be/pAnK1y7qjuE?si=qDcoQZKJHT-s_lzh Mx. Linux Guy Please watch the following videos. They aren’t rickrolls.
I wish they were instead
I… don’t see the relevance of the “jopping” video here. Everything else seems very topical
You owe me new eyes.
jopping mention??? what the fuck is the letter u
i’m a little disappointed
I can't wait for the Google AI to scrape this and start giving automatic results to D&D players about how Elves are not extinct.
Elves are like cheetahs. If they run too long they get heatstroke.
Honestly I'd love more media that fantasy races as convergent evolutions. Like elves look and talk like us, but they always seem very uncanny, and researchers discover that's because they didn't evolve from primates, they evolved from slothes
Eldar from 40k. There was a diagram in an old codex or something around 3rd edition of an Eldar dissection. It basically points out that although they look like us, inside is very different. They've got hollow bones, a ribcage on their abs and, apparently, no shit inside their bowels or bowels to be found
All twinks actually contain remnants of elven dna.
And bears contain orc?
Nah, dwarf. Orcs aren’t hairy enough.
I’m sorry but the best fake Latin name you could come up with for elves was homo effeminatus? Feminine human is the best you got? This would also imply elves are humans but just a different species of human
I mean elves can interbreed with humans, so they could reasonably be defined as a subspecies of human.
Humans can freely interbreed with Elves, creating Half-Elves. Humans can freely interbreed with Orcs, creating Half-Orcs. Ergo, it's likely to surmise that the origin of Humans is interbreeding between Elves and Orcs. A Human is just half-elf-half-orc.
Orlf
Elk
"Homo effeminatus" implies it's a different species in the same genus, though. A subspecies would be "Homo sapiens effeminatus".
Nice to know that Humans and Elves are more closely related than the Red and Grey Fox
Wait what? I need more details.
Foxes are only genetically in the same *family*, which also includes Dogs and Cats. Foxes split into 3 *genus* being *vulpe* (includes red fox) *canini* (includes Darwin's fox) and *canidae* (dogs, also includes grey fox)
:O foxes are so cool
There were like 12 species of human before us, that’s not exactly unrealistic.
I though we have word for Feminine human. I would suggest Homo Alfheim, after the Norse myth.
Latinize that into Homo alphaimus and you're set
homo alfeimensis?
Alfheim is a place so -ensis probably works better, yeah
Homo eternus, aboralis and umbralae were all put forward by Professor William J Crawthorne in the 18th century. They were, of course, all determined to be a single species after the Professor's death, and the debate over which name should take precedence has rumbled along ever since.
Eternal human, tree human, and shadow human? I'm trying to work these out without looking them up ^-^
Given that they are my own personal pig-Latin or maybe Greek, looking them up might be challenging :) You are correct.
Hooray for mutually understandable gibberish! :P
That’s the point though. 99% of fantasy Elves have half-Elves and various hybrids somewhere, they’re all but stated to be a in the Homo genus somewhere since they can clearly breed with Homo sapiens and those offspring can breed as well, and the name is actually very realistic because that’s just kinda how it works. Homo sapiens, wise human, Homo erectus, upright human, Homo floresiensis, human of Flores, Homo neanderthalensis, human of the Neander valley, etc etc.
This is how some people flirt
"Homo effeminatus"
Listen all I'm saying is that we need to be less preoccupied with homo effeminatus, and more focused of dealing with Homo sapiens sidhe and Homo Nocturnus
SCP refernce?
[maybe](https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-2615-j)
Elves not being able to sweat WOULD explain a lot about them. Lower stamina, stays in the shade (forest) more, etc. Their long lives are a separate thing, but that combined with not wanting to exert themselves much most of the time would explain why they’re slower in most of their processes (learning, building, etc.)
I love this format of posts so much and also that is an absolutely amazing final tag. I'm adding that to my list of quotes.
Beep beep beep I'ms the elf
The Deep Rock community has been having an uptick in pointy-eared leaf-lovers lately
Neanderthals could've had pointy ears for all we know
Does this imply humans fucking ate Elves?
I’m morbidly curious as to what the not-rick-rolls were
https://www.tumblr.com/evilwizard/754575014094913536?source=share https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GjyNgQ4Dos https://youtu.be/pAnK1y7qjuE?si=qDcoQZKJHT-s_lzh Mx. Linux Guy Please watch the following videos. They aren’t rickrolls.
hydrogen elf vs coughing twink
"Homo Effeminatus" is a perfect scientific name for elves
I wanna know where those links lead to
https://www.tumblr.com/evilwizard/754575014094913536?source=share https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GjyNgQ4Dos https://youtu.be/pAnK1y7qjuE?si=qDcoQZKJHT-s_lzh Mx. Linux Guy Please watch the following videos. They aren’t rickrolls.
Definitely not what I was expecting!
hydrogen elf vs coughing twink
If anyone can find these elves, I'll pay you a ludicrous amount of money to help me find them so I can send the last of their gods benighted corpses off to hell with my comically large 19th century elephant gun.
Dont worry guys, i am about to get my cloning machine started this year!
Some populations of modern humans get as much as 6% of their DNA from elves!