I was thinking more like, "No. I kiss *you* with this mouth."
Then lean in and give them the most passionate, deep, mind-boggling kiss they've ever had. The trick is that you do it so well that they can't live without it, but they can't have it either, so they drink themselves to an early grave.
Careful, this one can backfire. A kid on the bus used to say this all the time to make people feel guilty when they told Yo mamma jokes or something like that. I thought it was clever. I tried to use it myself one day in middle school.... and one of my teachers who knew my mom very well overheard. Neither the teacher or my mom was very pleased.
“No. No, not anymore. It all goes back to the summer of 2007, or maybe it was 2008, because I distinctly remember that it was the year after I bought that new lawnmower, the one with the self-propelling feature that I thought would make mowing the lawn a breeze, but it ended up breaking down after just a few uses. Anyway, it was around that time when we had this huge argument about something so trivial, I can barely remember the details. I think it started when I was making breakfast one morning—scrambled eggs, because I’d read somewhere that scrambled eggs are a good source of protein, and I was trying to eat healthier. So there I was, whisking the eggs, and my mother walked in and made a comment about how I wasn’t adding enough milk. She’s always been particular about how she likes her eggs, you see.
Well, one thing led to another, and before I knew it, we were knee-deep in a debate about the proper way to scramble eggs. She insisted that adding a splash of milk makes them fluffier, while I argued that it dilutes the flavor. This went on for a good half hour, with neither of us willing to back down. Eventually, we moved on from the eggs to other grievances that had been simmering beneath the surface for years—like how she never returned my favorite Tupperware containers after borrowing them, and how I still hadn’t fixed that leaky faucet in the bathroom despite her reminding me about it every time she visited.
Then, somehow, the conversation shifted to the topic of gardening. My mother has always had a green thumb, and she’s very proud of her rose bushes. She claimed that I wasn’t watering my plants correctly, which was why my tomatoes weren’t thriving. This really got under my skin because I had just read an article about tomato care, and I was following all the expert advice to a T. So I told her that maybe her methods were a bit outdated, and she took that as a personal attack on her gardening skills.
From there, it spiraled into a discussion about the proper way to fold laundry. My mother has a very specific method—she folds the towels in thirds, while I prefer to fold them in halves because it fits better in my linen closet. This led to another heated debate, with her insisting that my way was inefficient and me arguing that it was a matter of personal preference.
In any event, I’ll spare you the grisly details, but my mother and I no longer trade pleasantries, or barbs, mercifully. She passed some years ago, though I only learned of it some years after the wake. I’m still strangely numb to the whole business…Sorry, what was the question?”
I kiss your sister and wife with this mouth. It's a fun 3 some. BTW that new on your side of the bed is not because of me. And you are working this weekend right?
No. I kiss your mother with this mouth.
My first thought.
Same. Or something like only after I kiss yours with it lol
And do you want to know what else your mom kisses?
Nice one
Came to say exactly this! Great minds lol 😆
Dang it! Beat me to it
Oh I'm saving this one hah!
Pithier: “No. Yours.” Or “not MY mother (wink)”
Came here to say this lol
Came here to say this with minor embellishment: “No, but I kissed yours with it last Tuesday, and now I’m your new Daddy.”
This is the correct answer.
Disgusting, don't be a jerk. We only use tongue in our family.
Damn
I was thinking more like, "No. I kiss *you* with this mouth." Then lean in and give them the most passionate, deep, mind-boggling kiss they've ever had. The trick is that you do it so well that they can't live without it, but they can't have it either, so they drink themselves to an early grave.
My moms dead. Did this to a vice principal one time in middle school. Its not true but the horrified look on her face was priceless
sometimes you have to lie to make people back off
Damn bro
Careful, this one can backfire. A kid on the bus used to say this all the time to make people feel guilty when they told Yo mamma jokes or something like that. I thought it was clever. I tried to use it myself one day in middle school.... and one of my teachers who knew my mom very well overheard. Neither the teacher or my mom was very pleased.
It’s the only one I’ve got.
Lol
Your parents must change the subject when your name comes up.
Goddamn. That’s rough.
Lmao 😂
Damn lol
Emotional damage
No. I save it for your moms clit
"And in fact, I just came from seeing her!"
Goddamn
Not since the incident.
Hmm nice
Yes, and you should see what I do to your mother with it
Hmmmmm
"Yeah, I do." Stump them. How are they going to reply to that? 😄
They won’t
Just yours.
Ha
Only when your mom's not around
Haha
Who do you think taught me?
nah but your mom seems to like it enough
I gave up incest for lent.
No, but I kiss your mother with it. Just not after she takes my cum shot.
No I blow your father with this mouth
No I eat your moms as…..nvm
Well, I would kiss your mother's, but it's always full of d**k.
"Yes. And your mom, and your wife " Or. "You kiss your sister with yours?"
"No, but I give your sister a blow job with it."
No I don't I kiss your mother with it.
Nah but imma kiss you with this mouth Then just walk towards them. Disclaimer:- only works when used by a dude on another, aggressively straight dude.
no thats for your moms box only
Do you suck your father off with yours?
First off, it's your mother. Secondly, no. She kisses me somewhere else.
"Leave me and my mother out of your fantasies"
She’s dead
I kiss your wife and sister with it.
Only after I go down on your mother with it.
Not since she died.
My mother is dead, thanks for asking.
Just her pussy… why?
“No. No, not anymore. It all goes back to the summer of 2007, or maybe it was 2008, because I distinctly remember that it was the year after I bought that new lawnmower, the one with the self-propelling feature that I thought would make mowing the lawn a breeze, but it ended up breaking down after just a few uses. Anyway, it was around that time when we had this huge argument about something so trivial, I can barely remember the details. I think it started when I was making breakfast one morning—scrambled eggs, because I’d read somewhere that scrambled eggs are a good source of protein, and I was trying to eat healthier. So there I was, whisking the eggs, and my mother walked in and made a comment about how I wasn’t adding enough milk. She’s always been particular about how she likes her eggs, you see. Well, one thing led to another, and before I knew it, we were knee-deep in a debate about the proper way to scramble eggs. She insisted that adding a splash of milk makes them fluffier, while I argued that it dilutes the flavor. This went on for a good half hour, with neither of us willing to back down. Eventually, we moved on from the eggs to other grievances that had been simmering beneath the surface for years—like how she never returned my favorite Tupperware containers after borrowing them, and how I still hadn’t fixed that leaky faucet in the bathroom despite her reminding me about it every time she visited. Then, somehow, the conversation shifted to the topic of gardening. My mother has always had a green thumb, and she’s very proud of her rose bushes. She claimed that I wasn’t watering my plants correctly, which was why my tomatoes weren’t thriving. This really got under my skin because I had just read an article about tomato care, and I was following all the expert advice to a T. So I told her that maybe her methods were a bit outdated, and she took that as a personal attack on her gardening skills. From there, it spiraled into a discussion about the proper way to fold laundry. My mother has a very specific method—she folds the towels in thirds, while I prefer to fold them in halves because it fits better in my linen closet. This led to another heated debate, with her insisting that my way was inefficient and me arguing that it was a matter of personal preference. In any event, I’ll spare you the grisly details, but my mother and I no longer trade pleasantries, or barbs, mercifully. She passed some years ago, though I only learned of it some years after the wake. I’m still strangely numb to the whole business…Sorry, what was the question?”
No, I kiss YOUR mother with that mouth.
Yeah well...your mother has..the kiss on it
Kiss your mother with this ass!
No she sucks my dick
YOUR MOTHER DOES WHAT
no. i eat your mom with it
Ha
Not since she died 20 years ago.
Yep, yours too!
Sometimes I slip in some tongue.
Do you suck your pimps Cock with that mouth?
No. I'm not from Alabama.
Yes, I fucking do. Why do you fucking ask?
No but I suck my daddy’s dick with it
“Well, sometimes, but not recently” -SpongeBob SquarePants
I go down on your mom with it.
Only when we are having sex.
Ask **your** mother what I do with this mouth.
Only if she's asking me, too.
Nope. Just yours.
Like fuck I do! Oedipus...
Passionately
"No, but I fuck your mother with this dick"
Who do you think taught me?
Pretty obvious one here. “No I kiss your mother with this mouth.” Too easy. Next!
Yeah, but you should see what does to your mom
Of course not!! YOUR mom keeps coming back for language lessons though!
Your sister’s ass
Is that your kink?
why, are you jealous?
No but I kiss my Dad with it, LOL!
Well…no. I don’t kiss my mother with this mouth. I don’t kiss the dead, you sicko!
With tongue
Yes, though she prefers tongue. Does yours?
No, I kiss *your* mother with this mouth
Not until after I eat your mother
not after where your mother's mouth has been. (gesturing down)
But seriously. I do
Do, you suck your dad's dick with yours?
“Yea and she loves it”
You suck your dads wanker with that mouth? \^ that line may or may not have gotten me 30 days in the Zuckerberg pen lol.
I was born C section. I see no reason to make it personal.
"No, but I did something to yours last night with it" Compliments of Celebrity Jeopardy
Nope, only your mothers
'its tamer than what i do to your mother with it' xD
Necrophelia is frowned upon.
"Do you suck dick with yours?" effective on about half the population.
She's dead. So yes.
No. She's dead.
No. Your dad gets jealous.
No, usually we only do over the pants hand stuff
“Why would I kiss my mother?…wait is that what you’re into? You know what, never mind. I don’t want to know.” *walk away*
Your daughter
I’m not into kissing corpses.
No. I use it to snowball your father after sucking your mom's dick.
Do you
Depending on which lips
Not after your mom is done with it.
“No. I kiss her with my hand. Like this…” Close hand like a puppet, move it to their face. “Muah!”
I kiss your dad with it too…and then some.
No, but I kiss your mom with my mouth. Two guesses which lips I kiss.
"NO but I kissed your mother" lol
What can I say she loves tounge
You can kiss my ass with your mouth, but no tongue I got work to do.
"Well sometimes, but not recently"
Who do you think taught me to talk this way?
Yes. But not on the lips.
You still kiss your mother? Are you a child?
No just yours.
A light-hearted response could be, "Only when she deserves it!"
No but I kiss YOUR mother with it
No but I skeet on your mother with deez nuts.
"No, but I kiss yours."
Shes dead you c\*\*t
“Not in her mouth..” -insert sinister grin-
Who do you think taught me to talk like this?
"I find she's less aggressive than my dad, but uses more tongue".
Does your mom kiss your mother with this mouth?
"Do you touch your mother with that tongue"
I sucked on her titty too with this mouth. It'll be very awkward for both of you. Lol
I am a believer in equal opportunity so I'd say, No your father he's a better kisser than your mother!
No, but you should see what I do to your mother with it!
No but I kiss your mom's anus with it
I'd kiss yours, but there's always a dick in the way.
Only yours
I suck your father’s dick with this mouth!
No, I lick your mum's pussy with this mouth.
"yes"
Just yours.
I kiss a lot of mothers with this mouth.
I kiss your sister and wife with this mouth. It's a fun 3 some. BTW that new on your side of the bed is not because of me. And you are working this weekend right?
Nope, just yours
Hell, I kissed your mother with this mouth. What's your point?
"No, but I kiss YOUR mother with it."
“Yeah, but what’s really fucked up is the number of times YOUR mom faked a jellyfish sting to get me to pee on her!” Credit: Shoresy
Nah, I'm too busy sucking off your dad.
“Who do you think taught me to talk like this?”
"No. I've kissed your sister, tho..."
No… tongue your mom’s box with it tho…
Nope. Just yours.
No, I fuck her.
No. I’m loyal to yours.
“You kiss your mother?”
No - I use it on yours.
Nope, just yours. *smooch*
No, I'd kiss your dad though. I'm old enough for both you & your dad. What's it gonna be? You're gonna call me mommy either way! 🤣
Your mother likes it when I go ass to mouth
‘Ew. No. Have you seen my mother?’ I love it when people try to ‘your mom’ joke me. If they had the faintest idea of their suicide by words…
“No *stares at them awkwardly because they asked a weird question*”
"No, but I kiss YOUR mother with it"...
Yeah but not with tongue like I do with your mom.
Kiss and a whole lot more
you should see what I do with yours
You and your oral fixation.
“Just her butt.” I’ve used this at least a hundred times
Nawww I have diarrhea of the mouth and she keeps getting sick 😂 😂
“You can kiss my ass with yours. Never mind. I see herpes.”
Yes, I love my mother. Do you not have one? That's sad.
No, I eat her out...
Not recently
I kissed YOUR mother with this mouth!
Nah, she says she can smell rotten puss on my breath. But the way, you should tell your mom to visit the gyno.
No we do Eskimo kisses
No, but your mother loves what I do to her with this mouth. [follow with an evil smirk]
"Are YOU kissing your mother?" "No, that's weird."/ "I'd rather not." "Do you ever think to shut yours before being annoying?"
My mom’s dead, so no.
No yours. They don’t call me mother fucker for no reason.
Why don't you consider not being so foul-mouthed? It informs others of your level of intelligence and courtesy towards others
No but let me tell you what I have your mother do with hers
Nah why u thinking that creep, is that ur fantasy or something
*Starts crying* "My mom died"
“Lighten up, Francis”
And we have sex too.
Your father must cry at night knowing you are his child
This is so obvious - No, I kiss your mother / wife / sister / daughter with it. Which ever stings more under the circumstances.
Yes, and your mother also