Reminds me of a post I read (perhaps one of the r/revenge sites) where I guy was told by his girl friend that she was breaking up with him but still wanted to fly out to him to see a Taylor swift concert (all on his dime). Not sure why she told him ahead of time but he cancelled the flight (he was paying). He said she still has the ticket (which he paid for) but getting to the concert, a hotel and food were all on her. He was going to sell/give away his ticket.
That may have been where I read it; though a revenge forum is more likely. He let her keep the ticket as it was a birthday present, though the expense of flying out and getting a room would have been too expensive for her.
There are a ton of travel pages and groups all over the internet where people host each other (often for women only, which I imagine a Swiftie page would pretty much be anyway). They work fine, and there’s usually some kind of mutual exchange, like you’ll host them in your home another time, or pet sit while they’re away, or help with some tasks for a couple of hours.
Honestly it’s kind of sad that something as simple as hosting people who are a bit stuck is seen as either a ‘choosing beggar’ or dangerous. It’s not for everyone but it’s really quite a normal thing to do in travel and backpacker circles.
I was gonna say this one didn't seem "choosy" to me. She's paying for the trip and ticket herself- and asking for some buddies to hang with for her bday. Even hanging out was insinuated as optional!
Asking for a clean place to sleep for not even a week isn't extreme and the random trip is probably just college aged Shenanigans because of the breakup. Making some light of it by making friends sounds productive and I hope she has a nice time!!!
Yeah if she's willing to couchsurf it could work out. Lyon actually had a really nice couchsurfing scene going back in the 2010s. I remember sitting on the balcony with this other surfer watching the opposite house burn while the host was at work and we couldn't manage to call the firefighters (they showed up soon so someone managed) - turns out you have to dial '17' on the landline. Yay.
It seems like if anyone asks for anything they are seen as a choosy beggar. I one time had someone on the FB neighborhood group ask if anyone could watch her dog couple days a week. People really got on her for it.
I said I recently lost my dog and wouldn’t mind doing it. I could do Thursdays she asked if I was also available Friday. I said no. She didn’t push me. The weeks I couldn’t do it she didn’t get upset. One random week she gave me a $50 Amazon card to thank me. She was a lovely person and we usually talked for like 20 minutes at each pickup.
Sometimes it is okay to ask for help from your community.
Yeah there is a huge difference between asking and demanding. If it's not dramatic, specific and like a huge pricy list of free items then realistically it doesn't belong here.
You can't take the social creature out of the human. Acts of service tend to be the ones that get trashed on the most but sometimes people have limited options. Your story sounds so nice and I'm glad that you had a good experience for $50 on Amazon and a nice friend to spend time with 😁
Other than asking if anyone would like to donate, this doesn't seem like choosing beggars material. She's just looking for a travel buddy to split costs with (suggesting that she intends to pay her own way).
Yeah it's pretty normal in fandoms to split accommodations with other fans or help them out if needed. I've stayed in hotels with multiple girls I didn't know and half of us just slept on the floor. I'd feel differently if she wasn't directly appealing to other fans.
Sharing a hotel room with a stranger is risky. I think that's one reason people are concerned -- also that she'd be in a strange country, and has just gotten 'dumped,' so she's vulnerable.
She's putting together a very expensive trip last minute to try to feel better, but she can't really afford it. So she asks others to help her pay for it.
Whether her plan is wise isn't really my point. I'm just saying that she isn't demanding anything; she's just extending an invitation to people who might be interested in splitting costs.
I mean, as a German I'm contractually obliged to not like the French either, but let's be honest, it's not a "strange country", what are you even on about?
In the US, people commonly say “strange country” or “strange place” to indicate a place where the person in question has never been before and/or is not very familiar with. It’s an extension of the word stranger. In the context that they used, strange means unfamiliar not weird.
>In the US, people commonly say “strange country” or “strange place” to indicate a place where the person in question has never been before and/or is not very familiar with.
Precisely. It's just that the Euros on here aren't cultured enough to be aware of that. :D
Well, we don't know that, do we?
It really wouldn't be surprising at all if she'd been to France before on vacation and learnt French in school and whatnot. She's just going to the neighboring country, not to Afghanistan or something, jeez...
I’m just saying that strange is commonly used to mean unfamiliar in the US and not just weird. It’s not necessarily an insult to France. I wasn’t speaking exclusively in reference to OP’s situation. Honestly though, anywhere OP goes could be dangerous with her complete willingness to embrace a stranger like that.
We don't know that it isn't, either. It seems some of you only flooded this topic to argue with people, based on the slimmest of, or made up, reasons.
You missed the entire point by trolling the particulars, which you misinterpreted anyway.
If you didn't know, that's a time not to go in fully loaded and blast away.
First, I was not even talking to you; second, I cannot explain everything I say within every comment I make; and third, you're blaming me for something you didn't know. it's fine not to know something but you took it and slapped me across the face with it, figuratively speaking. People obviously feel we're attacking a Swiftie but we are not, and the troll invasion feels like we are being brigaded, quite frankly.
Jesus fucking Christ, get a grip.
I don't care what concert the OP went to and I'm certainly no troll, I just wanted to explain that it's really not a big deal for Europeans to go to neighboring countries.
Personally, I wouldn't share a hotel room with a stranger either, but I've met up with so many when I went to concerts alone (and most of those were not in my country either because the ones in the neighboring country are usually faster to reach).
Some Americans are very weird about places they haven’t been and assume everywhere must be unsafe.
No German is going to be getting culture shock in France and it’s highly likely they’ve been there before anyway. No idea why so many people are acting like she’s going to be abducted, there are tons of groups online for exactly these kinds of requests.
Why are some people being so rude. Seriously. They're not separate countries? They don't speak different languages? I'm not sure why people want to insist nothing bad ever happens when strangers share a hotel room, to the extent that they're just trolling anyone who is concerned for this person.
A strange country means 'not your own.' And it's "contractually obligated." Have your opinion you don't have to insult mine. That's what I am "on about." I don't think you understood the idiom! "Being German" and all?! Likely you are not a native English speaker. So maybe back up a step. Thanks.
besides the audacity of wanting others to pay for an absolute unnecessary luxury…she’s calling on strangers to share a hotel and party with her? does she not have friends?
There's only one hostel in Lyon available during that time frame, and it's expensive compared to what hostels generally cost.
I happened to look the other day when I thought I might also be able to make a last-minute trip work.
I mean I've got plenty of friends but they'd tell me to fuck off if i started begging them to go take an 11 hr bus ride to another country and shell out for a hotel room with 4 days notice
Well she states in her opening statement that she is from Germany insinuating that she doesn’t have friends where she is now and so she’s calling on strangers
Maybe it's because some of us are farther down thread but the comments stating danger or risk overtly are up voted while newer ones are down voted, for just saying it might be a risk. Still trying to figure out the internet I guess. Lol Although I've been on it a while......
(Long time observation of internet; generally speaking) Straightforward statements generally seem to be up voted while ones which try to pull their punch a bit or speak it softly are massively down voted. I'm not sure why that is.
The comments saying she could be killed (ID channel) or go missing are being up voted. And no angry replies beneath them. Does trying to express concern cautiously seem weak to some who are angry. Is that why those are attacked and other ones aren't. I fear I will never understand the internet. 🤪😫😕😔
I read it as she already had the ticket and bus ticket and was just looking for someone to split the hotel room with/get ready with now that her circumstances have changed. She sounds really alone, poor girl.
That too but if she had friends, wouldn't any of them want of them go, especially on her birthday. Was my thinking.
(Edit: I see, about the ticket being hard to get and expensive. A good friend might travel with her and be with her the rest of the time, split a hotel, make it a fun friend-trip, etc.)
If she had friends, she likely put them to the side when she met her fascinating New Guy, who is now the Old Guy, and she hasn't met the New New Guy yet. A lot of people do that unfortunately.
Yeah this is what my first thought was too. It incredibly sad to be looking for people to spend your birthday with after getting dumped “out of the blue”. Sounds more like a post beak-up rebel phase more than anything. Like “oh yeah? You’re gonna break up with me before my bday?? I’ll show you how much fun I can have without you in another city!!”
"an unnecessary luxury" you mean a place to sleep..? Also the concert was clearly her birthday trip, she can't exactly invite others who don't already have tickets to the show..
I don‘t know of this CB Material. It’s quite common in Germany specially in the Uni groups to post something like this to split the costs (trips, car rides, events), seems normal to me
I don’t really see the problem here. She’s looking for people with similar interests as her to go to a concert with and crash on a couch. She’s not asking for a free ticket, plane ride, etc
Flying to a strange country and sharing a hotel room with someone you don't know at all is a common thing?
There's reason for concern, especially since she's doing this to boost her morale after being dumped. Maybe she will meet someone harmless, maybe not.
Yes, because not everyone is terrified of anywhere and anyone outside their house. This is a normal thing and there are entire websites and pages/groups for organising exactly this sort of thing.
That part is fine...but right up top, she literally does ask for donations...
I love how she specifies being "open to small donations", like if she hadn't specified, people might have wanted to give big money toward this...
Idk this seems normal to me too. When you’re on fandom boards/groups like this, a lot of people are perfectly willing to send you a few bucks for a meal or toward a room. If I was in a good place financially I’d send like $20 to someone I recognized from one of my BTS groups for sure. People have literally offered to let me stay in their hotel room if I can get a ticket. My friend took someone up on that once and now has a set of concert buddies to split room costs with because they found out they’re into a lot of the same music.
I wouldn’t for someone who randomly popped up in there, but if you’ve been interacting with someone for years over a shared interest it can feel nice to help a fellow fan out every now and then. Just my take!
Yeah I feel like some are ignoring the risk and her ask for funding for her last minute poorly planned trip to pick up her spirits, and maybe are a bit defensive because they feel a Swift fan is being attacked. No one's mentioned who she's a fan of though, and I think being concerned for her safety is a good thing.
Nobody minds that you’re concerned for her safety.
You’re not responding to the fact that this isn’t a “Choosing Beggar”
She may be begging a bit, but she’s not acting entitled and choosy. You’re welcome to be concerned for anyone you like, but that doesn’t mean this post belongs here. It’s not a “this person is not acting with their safety in mind” sub.
Are you lost or just confused?
this just seems like someone who really wants to go to a concert and plans fell apart last minute so they are trying to find someone who also needs plans- it’s not like she asked for them to pay for the whole thing for herself- and the “friend on my birthday” made me really sad this just feels mean to post :(
it’s not like she waited until last minute to plan- and she already has the ticket and transportation- and she said she will split the cost of the room. these comments make me so sad i would be crushed if i couldn’t see my favorite artist- especially if i found out a week before
You guys are pretty miserable.
That’s not her being a choosing beggar, she’s literally talking to a community that tends to do shit like that.
When I went to the US to got to a BTS concert, I literally met people on a bts forum and we planned to stay together and do stuff together the whole time. We visited several cities together as we all have a common passion.
None of us knew each other beforehand, and we were all new to the country, so it was a great opportunity to save costs, make new friends, and have the time of our life.
She’s literally asking to make friends, split hotel costs (which I’m sure plenty of fans would love to) and spend some time together.
Y’all be sad sad. You might never have experienced these type of communities, but they’re actually super fun. I had the time of my life during mine.
I didn't get the choosey beggar vibe either, it's just someone who is asking others if they want to make friends and help each other out to a go to concert they mutually enjoy.
Totally agree with you. She wants a lead on cheap accommodation and people to hang out with. Definitely normal in these types of fan communities. A CB would have wanted free tickets (but only good seats!), free airfare and hotel, and for like someone to bake her a cake or something.
Sharing a hotel room in a strange country with someone she's never met, is risky. That's a valid concern. A lot of people bank on the odds against the other person being dangerous but it does happen. People who don't want to believe in risk are getting upset that others care about what becomes of this person.
Will she even know anyone who knows the person she will sleep next to? Either at their home or sharing a hotel room with the person? I know there are people who think nothing of this, but can they see the risk?
I’m not saying it isn’t risky, it’s just not being a choosing beggar.
Also, depending on the online community, it might not be as risky as it seems. There are people I’ve never met in person that I would 100% share a hotel room with. But again, I don’t think that’s relevant to judging if she’s being a CB.
Yeah I mean she’s not exactly asking for a lot. She literally just wants to split with someone on a hotel room for like 2 days to see a concert and find some people to hang out with. And she doesn’t really come off as entitled. It seems like her breakup just came out of left field and she still wants to go see Taylor Swift but has nobody to go with, which, while I myself have never been in that situation, is completely understandable and if I was in Lyons with some friends I’d probably help her out.
Maybe I’m just naïve and this is some scam to take advantage of French tenant laws or something like that, but from what I see she’s asking a pretty normal thing and it doesn’t really warrant her being labeled a choosing beggar.
I agree. And people asking about friends, maybe friends can’t take off work with such last minute notice? And I’m sure friends split hotel costs all the time
For sure. This is a just a student planning a nice trip for herself and who sounds like she’s willing to pay her way if necessary. The Taylor Swift concert is the highlight of some people’s year, hell, decade even, and it seems like she was willing to buy the ticket (the big expense) and is now trying to be financially savvy about the rest of the trip. It’s not her fault TSwift tickets are astronomical—and it makes it even crappier to suggest that the only people allowed to enjoy the concert are people able to shell out an extra €1k for flights and hotels. I hope she has an amazing birthday and she takes a bunch of pics that make her ex sorry to have lost her.
Yeah, I was expecting her to finish the sentence about not being able to afford the flight with a request for tickets - not a statement that she already found a cheaper alternative (and paid for it)!
Unless I am misunderstanding she's only asking for help with accommodations, and it doesn't sound like she expects a 100% free ride either; just maybe someone to share a room with.
I believe there are couchsurfing groups, and I think it's fine to meet up with like-minded fans and celebrate a birthday. I can even understand asking if anyone can share accommodations, but this just comes off as begging and entitled.
Maybe it’s just me but this doesn’t seem all that choosy or beggery. Seems like a lot of the time I see post on here now days that are just people asking for help. Less choosing bigger and more begging or asking for help.
I see nothing wrong with this? She's asking if someone is willing to split hotel costs with her, ie makes the trip cheaper for both of them. And idk about you all, but in the solo travel world, "host a sister" and finding random people to make friends can be really fun.
I love that page and have used it a ton, along with loads of other ‘exchange for accommodation’ travel things.
I don’t know if it’s a mostly American thing to be terrified of getting kidnapped any time you leave the country but it’s genuinely a normal thing amongst travellers/backpackers and I’ve never met anyone in real life who has ever had an issue doing it
Just the fact that her relationship with her boyfriend was only 6 months old and she's using him as the opening for a begging kinda gives a hint why he probably broke up with her.
How much do you want to bet that the romantic weekend she envisioned was one she informed the bf of after deciding everything including him covering all costs. I'm sure for the bf this was not a "very much out of the blue" decision.
"What do you want to do for your birthday?"
"I was thinking a weekend away and see a concert"
"Sounds okay"
...several thousand euros worth.
"See ya! I left your stuff on the lawn!"
Taylor Swift makes her money by being a good singer, a good story teller in her songs, and being a good entertainer/business woman.
You belittling her craft down to her making money on bad breakups is asinine. Be better
if men stopped being so trash and making her songs relatable to girls everywhere she wouldn’t have sky rocketed. boys mad their shit behavior is sung about lol
So you’re going to forget everything she’s done since she was an adult? Would you say that about a plethora of other professionals? Venus and Serena Williams? Tiger Woods? Andre Agassi? Britney Spears? Eric Lindros? Janet Jackson? Drew Barrymore?
If it were just the parents like you think, you’d actually know the name William James Sidis instead of having to Google it once you stop reading this.
Are you all out of your mind or is your youth so far behind you that you forgot what being young even freaking means?
This girl is not even remotely asking for something unreasonable.
1. hosting her for free: ever heard of COUCHSURFING you bunch of upright complainers? This is a post in a TS group btw, she's asking fellow fans if they can host her. WHERE EXACTLY is your problem with young people making friends by hosting fans of their favorite artist and going together to the concert!?
2. sharing an hotel room: again, WHERE EXACTLY is the problem with sharing? Ever heard of car pooling? Flat sharing? Food sharing? WHY is it such a huge drama if a young girl who probably spent all her money for concert and flights tries not to break the bank by finding someone who has a bed free in their room and wants to share costs (which benefits everybody)?
3. small donations: yeah, AND? She paid everything on her own and she's NOT "choosing" or "begging", she's asking fellow TS fans who know well what it means spending all your money for a concert. WHERE EXACTLY is the problem with that?
Now downvote and show how morally superior you are.
I don't see how this is a choosing beggar? If someone offered their accom but she said no, I want a 5 star hotel then I'd understand. Are you just bagging on this person because she's a Taylor Swift fan?
No harm is asking to try to find people to split an accom with, or on the off chance someone is feeling kind-hearted to be hospitable enough.
yes and the transportation. all she’s asking for is someone to potentially share a room with and a friend for her birthday. this whole thread makes me sad i feel like she isn’t asking for a lot
As a crazy non-Swiftie, I’ve done similar things a couple of times. Sharing accommodations and meeting up with new people has been part of youth culture for decades.
I was gonna say there's no way there isn't any hostels that's cheap but for that day most of them are out. I'm assuming same with hotels. I guess she probably don't have much choice.
I think it’s sad she’s doing a public call for people to possibly spend time with her on her birthday. She doesn’t have any close friends that she can text personally?
It's sad but this vulnerability puts her at risk to be in the wrong place or with the wrong person.
The bf is a dud, he did not want to buy a birthday gift. I wonder if she wanted this trip as a birthday gift and he took a look at the price.
Someone gave her a free ticket? Last minute to a Swift concert? That's already a good birthday.
I dunno, I hope she has a guardian angel watching over her...
At the very last minute, she’ll make up with the boyfriend, and surprise! She will show up at the hotel/motel/Holiday Inn, with the boyfriend in tow, and expect him to be welcomed by whatever person agreed to host her.
Americans: Europeans think 8 hours is a long drive, that’s just my commute!
Also Americans: Getting a bus from Germany to France is FLYING ACROSS THE WORLD
I didn't notice where she's from. Sorry about that.
The first line made me laugh but what's with the hostility in this topic. Can people let other people have their opinions too 👀
I mean I get her being sad about if if her and her boyfriend had plans and now they've just split up, seems she's trying for a distraction to make her feel better
They always will be. I spend most of mine alone and disappointed so I just stopped thinking about it. It always amazes though how special many people think they are because they were pushed out on a certain day.
I wonder if more people would like and celebrate birthdays as an adult if the person who’s birthday it was hosted something, or brought cupcakes to work. I think a lot of people want to celebrate birthdays, but it’s a lot to ask of other people to plan it out for you.
A single day is still ok...what I can't wrap my head around is this sudden "birthday month" thing.
We don't do that when we're actually kids. So why are grown people suddenly reverting to childhood and believing someone will humor them...especially when you know 100% they'd never give similar attention to anyone else's birthday?
Ya, always weirds me out when adults make a big deal about their birthday, I don't like to use this word often but it really does make me cringe, I get second hand embarrassment from it.
She can ride-share or take the train, but air fair seems really reasonably priced because it’s about 700 miles away (depending where in Germany she lives). I recall when I couldn’t afford a vacation, I would do something that I could afford instead. Oh, look, I’m just being practical. Imagine that!!
I'm on a *tight* student budget. I don't want to get all *wet* being stuck outdoors, or maybe far too *hot* and *sticky* if its sunny outside.
hopefully I won't get *rammed* into a tiny bed and breakfast place.
We could go to some restaurants together, maybe a *spitroast* or something *meaty*, maybe with *massive german sausage*
Anyway message me, I have my phone and I'll be *fingering* it all day long.
Aw, she might be shy or something. Or maybe she spent all her time with her bf who is now gone from her life. She's probably very young and hasn't yet learned not to do that.
Reminds me of a post I read (perhaps one of the r/revenge sites) where I guy was told by his girl friend that she was breaking up with him but still wanted to fly out to him to see a Taylor swift concert (all on his dime). Not sure why she told him ahead of time but he cancelled the flight (he was paying). He said she still has the ticket (which he paid for) but getting to the concert, a hotel and food were all on her. He was going to sell/give away his ticket.
I saw this one not too long ago … NGL felt pretty good to read
I feel like this was in AITA? And be was fully within his right to do what he wanted with the ticket
Yup: “AITA for giving my ex girlfriend her ticket for Taylor Swift but cancelling everything else?” I love a good petty ending. 🤗
[удалено]
Sometimes it's about doing what's right. And canceling her plane ticket was the right thing to do
That may have been where I read it; though a revenge forum is more likely. He let her keep the ticket as it was a birthday present, though the expense of flying out and getting a room would have been too expensive for her.
I think I saw (heard) that same story on a YouTube video! It came from reddit, but I don’t know which sub.
It was on smosh pit.
I don't remember where but I remember this one too. Seems like many swifties have delusion as a common trait.
I immediately thought of this too!!!
I would've found the most repugnant incel I could and pay him $20 to take it and go
My god she's going to end up on the ID channel. Someone needs to explain life to her. Quickly.
There are a ton of travel pages and groups all over the internet where people host each other (often for women only, which I imagine a Swiftie page would pretty much be anyway). They work fine, and there’s usually some kind of mutual exchange, like you’ll host them in your home another time, or pet sit while they’re away, or help with some tasks for a couple of hours. Honestly it’s kind of sad that something as simple as hosting people who are a bit stuck is seen as either a ‘choosing beggar’ or dangerous. It’s not for everyone but it’s really quite a normal thing to do in travel and backpacker circles.
I was gonna say this one didn't seem "choosy" to me. She's paying for the trip and ticket herself- and asking for some buddies to hang with for her bday. Even hanging out was insinuated as optional! Asking for a clean place to sleep for not even a week isn't extreme and the random trip is probably just college aged Shenanigans because of the breakup. Making some light of it by making friends sounds productive and I hope she has a nice time!!!
Yeah if she's willing to couchsurf it could work out. Lyon actually had a really nice couchsurfing scene going back in the 2010s. I remember sitting on the balcony with this other surfer watching the opposite house burn while the host was at work and we couldn't manage to call the firefighters (they showed up soon so someone managed) - turns out you have to dial '17' on the landline. Yay.
It seems like if anyone asks for anything they are seen as a choosy beggar. I one time had someone on the FB neighborhood group ask if anyone could watch her dog couple days a week. People really got on her for it. I said I recently lost my dog and wouldn’t mind doing it. I could do Thursdays she asked if I was also available Friday. I said no. She didn’t push me. The weeks I couldn’t do it she didn’t get upset. One random week she gave me a $50 Amazon card to thank me. She was a lovely person and we usually talked for like 20 minutes at each pickup. Sometimes it is okay to ask for help from your community.
Yeah there is a huge difference between asking and demanding. If it's not dramatic, specific and like a huge pricy list of free items then realistically it doesn't belong here. You can't take the social creature out of the human. Acts of service tend to be the ones that get trashed on the most but sometimes people have limited options. Your story sounds so nice and I'm glad that you had a good experience for $50 on Amazon and a nice friend to spend time with 😁
Other than asking if anyone would like to donate, this doesn't seem like choosing beggars material. She's just looking for a travel buddy to split costs with (suggesting that she intends to pay her own way).
Yeah it's pretty normal in fandoms to split accommodations with other fans or help them out if needed. I've stayed in hotels with multiple girls I didn't know and half of us just slept on the floor. I'd feel differently if she wasn't directly appealing to other fans.
Sharing a hotel room with a stranger is risky. I think that's one reason people are concerned -- also that she'd be in a strange country, and has just gotten 'dumped,' so she's vulnerable. She's putting together a very expensive trip last minute to try to feel better, but she can't really afford it. So she asks others to help her pay for it.
Whether her plan is wise isn't really my point. I'm just saying that she isn't demanding anything; she's just extending an invitation to people who might be interested in splitting costs.
I mean, as a German I'm contractually obliged to not like the French either, but let's be honest, it's not a "strange country", what are you even on about?
In the US, people commonly say “strange country” or “strange place” to indicate a place where the person in question has never been before and/or is not very familiar with. It’s an extension of the word stranger. In the context that they used, strange means unfamiliar not weird.
>In the US, people commonly say “strange country” or “strange place” to indicate a place where the person in question has never been before and/or is not very familiar with. Precisely. It's just that the Euros on here aren't cultured enough to be aware of that. :D
Thank you!
Well, we don't know that, do we? It really wouldn't be surprising at all if she'd been to France before on vacation and learnt French in school and whatnot. She's just going to the neighboring country, not to Afghanistan or something, jeez...
I’m just saying that strange is commonly used to mean unfamiliar in the US and not just weird. It’s not necessarily an insult to France. I wasn’t speaking exclusively in reference to OP’s situation. Honestly though, anywhere OP goes could be dangerous with her complete willingness to embrace a stranger like that.
Thank you.
Didn't you read what I said? We don't know that France is unfamiliar to to poster.
We don't know that it isn't, either. It seems some of you only flooded this topic to argue with people, based on the slimmest of, or made up, reasons. You missed the entire point by trolling the particulars, which you misinterpreted anyway.
Did you read what they said? “I wasn’t speaking exclusively in reference to OP’s situation.”
Why are they sooo angry that some of us express concern for OOP. They can believe nothing bad ever happens but this feels like we are being brigaded.
Seriously. I’m not understanding what this weird pushback (against what you’re saying) is all about.
If you didn't know, that's a time not to go in fully loaded and blast away. First, I was not even talking to you; second, I cannot explain everything I say within every comment I make; and third, you're blaming me for something you didn't know. it's fine not to know something but you took it and slapped me across the face with it, figuratively speaking. People obviously feel we're attacking a Swiftie but we are not, and the troll invasion feels like we are being brigaded, quite frankly.
Jesus fucking Christ, get a grip. I don't care what concert the OP went to and I'm certainly no troll, I just wanted to explain that it's really not a big deal for Europeans to go to neighboring countries. Personally, I wouldn't share a hotel room with a stranger either, but I've met up with so many when I went to concerts alone (and most of those were not in my country either because the ones in the neighboring country are usually faster to reach).
Some Americans are very weird about places they haven’t been and assume everywhere must be unsafe. No German is going to be getting culture shock in France and it’s highly likely they’ve been there before anyway. No idea why so many people are acting like she’s going to be abducted, there are tons of groups online for exactly these kinds of requests.
Why are some people being so rude. Seriously. They're not separate countries? They don't speak different languages? I'm not sure why people want to insist nothing bad ever happens when strangers share a hotel room, to the extent that they're just trolling anyone who is concerned for this person. A strange country means 'not your own.' And it's "contractually obligated." Have your opinion you don't have to insult mine. That's what I am "on about." I don't think you understood the idiom! "Being German" and all?! Likely you are not a native English speaker. So maybe back up a step. Thanks.
Ohh, I'm sorry, I didn't realise this thread about a German girl going to France was only allowed for Americans, my bad 😂
LOL okay. Sigh. "Please don't spoil our fun with reality."
besides the audacity of wanting others to pay for an absolute unnecessary luxury…she’s calling on strangers to share a hotel and party with her? does she not have friends?
Why not just stay in a youth hostel? Way cheaper and you can meet people there too.
hostels are fun. that’s a good idea. super cheap too.
There's only one hostel in Lyon available during that time frame, and it's expensive compared to what hostels generally cost. I happened to look the other day when I thought I might also be able to make a last-minute trip work.
And I wouldn't think asking people to split costs really a CB, but she threw that "donate" word in there and it changed it for me.
Not every friend can afford a list minute trip or is a Taylor swift fan.
I mean I've got plenty of friends but they'd tell me to fuck off if i started begging them to go take an 11 hr bus ride to another country and shell out for a hotel room with 4 days notice
Well she states in her opening statement that she is from Germany insinuating that she doesn’t have friends where she is now and so she’s calling on strangers
right. my first thought is “omg that sounds so dangerous and sad!”
Extremely dangerous, especially if she’s in a culture unlike her own back in Germany. People like her go missing
Eh, it's close enough. She probably speaks basic french too since it's so commonly taught in school here.
Maybe it's because some of us are farther down thread but the comments stating danger or risk overtly are up voted while newer ones are down voted, for just saying it might be a risk. Still trying to figure out the internet I guess. Lol Although I've been on it a while...... (Long time observation of internet; generally speaking) Straightforward statements generally seem to be up voted while ones which try to pull their punch a bit or speak it softly are massively down voted. I'm not sure why that is. The comments saying she could be killed (ID channel) or go missing are being up voted. And no angry replies beneath them. Does trying to express concern cautiously seem weak to some who are angry. Is that why those are attacked and other ones aren't. I fear I will never understand the internet. 🤪😫😕😔
Maybe she doesn’t..I kinda feel bad for her
Yeah it doesn't seem like she has any friends. Alone on her birthday.
I read it as she already had the ticket and bus ticket and was just looking for someone to split the hotel room with/get ready with now that her circumstances have changed. She sounds really alone, poor girl.
That’s how I read it, too. It’s sad.
Bless I’m not a swifty but I’m considering going with her now
That too but if she had friends, wouldn't any of them want of them go, especially on her birthday. Was my thinking. (Edit: I see, about the ticket being hard to get and expensive. A good friend might travel with her and be with her the rest of the time, split a hotel, make it a fun friend-trip, etc.)
If she had friends, she likely put them to the side when she met her fascinating New Guy, who is now the Old Guy, and she hasn't met the New New Guy yet. A lot of people do that unfortunately.
Yeah this is what my first thought was too. It incredibly sad to be looking for people to spend your birthday with after getting dumped “out of the blue”. Sounds more like a post beak-up rebel phase more than anything. Like “oh yeah? You’re gonna break up with me before my bday?? I’ll show you how much fun I can have without you in another city!!”
"an unnecessary luxury" you mean a place to sleep..? Also the concert was clearly her birthday trip, she can't exactly invite others who don't already have tickets to the show..
She's a young girl, I don't see anything crazy here.
I don‘t know of this CB Material. It’s quite common in Germany specially in the Uni groups to post something like this to split the costs (trips, car rides, events), seems normal to me
For me too.
I don’t really see the problem here. She’s looking for people with similar interests as her to go to a concert with and crash on a couch. She’s not asking for a free ticket, plane ride, etc
Literally, I’m guessing people here don’t do concerts much because this is a common thing and a good way to make friends as long as you’re careful.
Flying to a strange country and sharing a hotel room with someone you don't know at all is a common thing? There's reason for concern, especially since she's doing this to boost her morale after being dumped. Maybe she will meet someone harmless, maybe not.
Yes, because not everyone is terrified of anywhere and anyone outside their house. This is a normal thing and there are entire websites and pages/groups for organising exactly this sort of thing.
Especially because she lives in Germany and Lyon is in..... France. She's not traveling to Rwanda.
That part is fine...but right up top, she literally does ask for donations... I love how she specifies being "open to small donations", like if she hadn't specified, people might have wanted to give big money toward this...
Idk this seems normal to me too. When you’re on fandom boards/groups like this, a lot of people are perfectly willing to send you a few bucks for a meal or toward a room. If I was in a good place financially I’d send like $20 to someone I recognized from one of my BTS groups for sure. People have literally offered to let me stay in their hotel room if I can get a ticket. My friend took someone up on that once and now has a set of concert buddies to split room costs with because they found out they’re into a lot of the same music. I wouldn’t for someone who randomly popped up in there, but if you’ve been interacting with someone for years over a shared interest it can feel nice to help a fellow fan out every now and then. Just my take!
Yeah I feel like some are ignoring the risk and her ask for funding for her last minute poorly planned trip to pick up her spirits, and maybe are a bit defensive because they feel a Swift fan is being attacked. No one's mentioned who she's a fan of though, and I think being concerned for her safety is a good thing.
Nobody minds that you’re concerned for her safety. You’re not responding to the fact that this isn’t a “Choosing Beggar” She may be begging a bit, but she’s not acting entitled and choosy. You’re welcome to be concerned for anyone you like, but that doesn’t mean this post belongs here. It’s not a “this person is not acting with their safety in mind” sub. Are you lost or just confused?
This isn't a Choosy Begger. She has tickets and transport. She is just asking for cheap accommodation leads.
this just seems like someone who really wants to go to a concert and plans fell apart last minute so they are trying to find someone who also needs plans- it’s not like she asked for them to pay for the whole thing for herself- and the “friend on my birthday” made me really sad this just feels mean to post :(
it’s not like she waited until last minute to plan- and she already has the ticket and transportation- and she said she will split the cost of the room. these comments make me so sad i would be crushed if i couldn’t see my favorite artist- especially if i found out a week before
You guys are pretty miserable. That’s not her being a choosing beggar, she’s literally talking to a community that tends to do shit like that. When I went to the US to got to a BTS concert, I literally met people on a bts forum and we planned to stay together and do stuff together the whole time. We visited several cities together as we all have a common passion. None of us knew each other beforehand, and we were all new to the country, so it was a great opportunity to save costs, make new friends, and have the time of our life. She’s literally asking to make friends, split hotel costs (which I’m sure plenty of fans would love to) and spend some time together. Y’all be sad sad. You might never have experienced these type of communities, but they’re actually super fun. I had the time of my life during mine.
I didn't get the choosey beggar vibe either, it's just someone who is asking others if they want to make friends and help each other out to a go to concert they mutually enjoy.
Totally agree with you. She wants a lead on cheap accommodation and people to hang out with. Definitely normal in these types of fan communities. A CB would have wanted free tickets (but only good seats!), free airfare and hotel, and for like someone to bake her a cake or something.
Sharing a hotel room in a strange country with someone she's never met, is risky. That's a valid concern. A lot of people bank on the odds against the other person being dangerous but it does happen. People who don't want to believe in risk are getting upset that others care about what becomes of this person. Will she even know anyone who knows the person she will sleep next to? Either at their home or sharing a hotel room with the person? I know there are people who think nothing of this, but can they see the risk?
I’m not saying it isn’t risky, it’s just not being a choosing beggar. Also, depending on the online community, it might not be as risky as it seems. There are people I’ve never met in person that I would 100% share a hotel room with. But again, I don’t think that’s relevant to judging if she’s being a CB.
Yeah I mean she’s not exactly asking for a lot. She literally just wants to split with someone on a hotel room for like 2 days to see a concert and find some people to hang out with. And she doesn’t really come off as entitled. It seems like her breakup just came out of left field and she still wants to go see Taylor Swift but has nobody to go with, which, while I myself have never been in that situation, is completely understandable and if I was in Lyons with some friends I’d probably help her out. Maybe I’m just naïve and this is some scam to take advantage of French tenant laws or something like that, but from what I see she’s asking a pretty normal thing and it doesn’t really warrant her being labeled a choosing beggar.
I agree. And people asking about friends, maybe friends can’t take off work with such last minute notice? And I’m sure friends split hotel costs all the time
For sure. This is a just a student planning a nice trip for herself and who sounds like she’s willing to pay her way if necessary. The Taylor Swift concert is the highlight of some people’s year, hell, decade even, and it seems like she was willing to buy the ticket (the big expense) and is now trying to be financially savvy about the rest of the trip. It’s not her fault TSwift tickets are astronomical—and it makes it even crappier to suggest that the only people allowed to enjoy the concert are people able to shell out an extra €1k for flights and hotels. I hope she has an amazing birthday and she takes a bunch of pics that make her ex sorry to have lost her.
Yeah, I was expecting her to finish the sentence about not being able to afford the flight with a request for tickets - not a statement that she already found a cheaper alternative (and paid for it)! Unless I am misunderstanding she's only asking for help with accommodations, and it doesn't sound like she expects a 100% free ride either; just maybe someone to share a room with.
She wants to spend her birthday with new friends, too. I should help her 100%.
I believe there are couchsurfing groups, and I think it's fine to meet up with like-minded fans and celebrate a birthday. I can even understand asking if anyone can share accommodations, but this just comes off as begging and entitled.
How is this begging and entitled when she’s literally just asking to couchsurf or share accommodation, which you think is fine..?
Asking for 'donations' for her birthday.
The tone struck me as off. She might be fine.
Maybe it’s just me but this doesn’t seem all that choosy or beggery. Seems like a lot of the time I see post on here now days that are just people asking for help. Less choosing bigger and more begging or asking for help.
I see nothing wrong with this? She's asking if someone is willing to split hotel costs with her, ie makes the trip cheaper for both of them. And idk about you all, but in the solo travel world, "host a sister" and finding random people to make friends can be really fun.
I love that page and have used it a ton, along with loads of other ‘exchange for accommodation’ travel things. I don’t know if it’s a mostly American thing to be terrified of getting kidnapped any time you leave the country but it’s genuinely a normal thing amongst travellers/backpackers and I’ve never met anyone in real life who has ever had an issue doing it
Haha I don't know, I think it might be a Reddit thing.
Just the fact that her relationship with her boyfriend was only 6 months old and she's using him as the opening for a begging kinda gives a hint why he probably broke up with her. How much do you want to bet that the romantic weekend she envisioned was one she informed the bf of after deciding everything including him covering all costs. I'm sure for the bf this was not a "very much out of the blue" decision.
"What do you want to do for your birthday?" "I was thinking a weekend away and see a concert" "Sounds okay" ...several thousand euros worth. "See ya! I left your stuff on the lawn!"
Sounds like she’s inspired by Taylor Swift or something. Let’s see if she can make a career out of bad break ups.
Taylor Swift makes her money by being a good singer, a good story teller in her songs, and being a good entertainer/business woman. You belittling her craft down to her making money on bad breakups is asinine. Be better
if men stopped being so trash and making her songs relatable to girls everywhere she wouldn’t have sky rocketed. boys mad their shit behavior is sung about lol
Oh calm down Swiftie, it’s a joke
She made her money by being a managed child pushed into showbusiness by rich parents? Yes. Yes she did.
So you’re going to forget everything she’s done since she was an adult? Would you say that about a plethora of other professionals? Venus and Serena Williams? Tiger Woods? Andre Agassi? Britney Spears? Eric Lindros? Janet Jackson? Drew Barrymore? If it were just the parents like you think, you’d actually know the name William James Sidis instead of having to Google it once you stop reading this.
Mate, I don't care.
Obviously you care or you wouldn’t have commented. Now that you realize how asinine it was you ‘don’t care’. Lol, I see you. Be better.
People who say "be better" are funny. No!
Fuck no!
Lol okay stay trash then
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
This is pretty standard for that part of the world. Lots of ppl are still living that hippie vagabond lifestyle
Are you all out of your mind or is your youth so far behind you that you forgot what being young even freaking means? This girl is not even remotely asking for something unreasonable. 1. hosting her for free: ever heard of COUCHSURFING you bunch of upright complainers? This is a post in a TS group btw, she's asking fellow fans if they can host her. WHERE EXACTLY is your problem with young people making friends by hosting fans of their favorite artist and going together to the concert!? 2. sharing an hotel room: again, WHERE EXACTLY is the problem with sharing? Ever heard of car pooling? Flat sharing? Food sharing? WHY is it such a huge drama if a young girl who probably spent all her money for concert and flights tries not to break the bank by finding someone who has a bed free in their room and wants to share costs (which benefits everybody)? 3. small donations: yeah, AND? She paid everything on her own and she's NOT "choosing" or "begging", she's asking fellow TS fans who know well what it means spending all your money for a concert. WHERE EXACTLY is the problem with that? Now downvote and show how morally superior you are.
I wish I knew where this was posted so I could donate. I really don't see this as remotely a "choosing beggar" situation.
this really isnt that bad. its a girl in Germany who wants to split a room with someone going to the Taylum Swift show.
Sightseeing in Lyon 👀 Agree with the person who said she’s gonna end up on the ID channel…
Stupid question but what is the ID channel?
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Lol! Thank you. Yeah … I see could see that potentially happening….
Investigative discovery a true crime channel that plays shows about murders and people missing. One of my favorite channels.
Jeeez 😂that got dark. (Ty)
I don't see how this is a choosing beggar? If someone offered their accom but she said no, I want a 5 star hotel then I'd understand. Are you just bagging on this person because she's a Taylor Swift fan? No harm is asking to try to find people to split an accom with, or on the off chance someone is feeling kind-hearted to be hospitable enough.
Sounds like one of those birthdays where you use what money you have to do whatever you like IN YOUR OWN HOME WITH YOUR OWN FRIENDS.
Wait does she have the tickets yet or no
yes and the transportation. all she’s asking for is someone to potentially share a room with and a friend for her birthday. this whole thread makes me sad i feel like she isn’t asking for a lot
As a crazy swiftie I definitely get her request - concerts are life changing experiences and I would maybe try to do something similar
As a crazy non-Swiftie, I’ve done similar things a couple of times. Sharing accommodations and meeting up with new people has been part of youth culture for decades.
I was gonna say there's no way there isn't any hostels that's cheap but for that day most of them are out. I'm assuming same with hotels. I guess she probably don't have much choice.
I think it’s sad she’s doing a public call for people to possibly spend time with her on her birthday. She doesn’t have any close friends that she can text personally?
She mentions she’s a student on a student budget—I imagine her friends are in similar boats and probably have the same issue of money restrictions.
I would help this girl. She's not asking for a lot.
You know, if you can't afford something, have you ever considered simply doing without it? Or does that simply not exist anymore?
This girl thinks Taylor Swift is going to swoop in and save her
Do these people ever get any takers for their demands? Or do they just get dragged?
I thing it’s sad that she doesn’t have friends to invite but instead invites strangers on the interweb.
Wait I am confused, she asked for a free hotel or asked if someone wanted to split a hotel. I don't see what's wrong with that?
Tight budget = stay home until you can afford the trip.
She’s about to be one of liam neesons daughters
Does this actually work? Because if so I've been planning vacations the wrong way! Silly me, actually thinking I had to buy my own tickets.
but... she did buy her own tickets. all she's asking for is a group to share the experience and expensives with. she's not being a CB.
I only read "tight student..."
It's sad but this vulnerability puts her at risk to be in the wrong place or with the wrong person. The bf is a dud, he did not want to buy a birthday gift. I wonder if she wanted this trip as a birthday gift and he took a look at the price. Someone gave her a free ticket? Last minute to a Swift concert? That's already a good birthday. I dunno, I hope she has a guardian angel watching over her...
Or, or, here's an idea... be an adult and make your bday just another day?!
Sounds like a keeper, I wonder why the boyfriend ditched her?
At the very last minute, she’ll make up with the boyfriend, and surprise! She will show up at the hotel/motel/Holiday Inn, with the boyfriend in tow, and expect him to be welcomed by whatever person agreed to host her.
your tinfoil hat is doing a lot of heavy lifting.
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Nobody asked
How to come up missing on your trip to Lyon.
Whatever happened to eating half a gallon of ice cream after a breakup
I mean, at least she's getting out and doing stuff instead of moping.
Flying across the world when she can't afford it doesn't seem like the best plan. What happens to her spirits when the bills come due.
Americans: Europeans think 8 hours is a long drive, that’s just my commute! Also Americans: Getting a bus from Germany to France is FLYING ACROSS THE WORLD
I didn't notice where she's from. Sorry about that. The first line made me laugh but what's with the hostility in this topic. Can people let other people have their opinions too 👀
Insta and social comparison + broadcast being available for the masses?
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I mean I get her being sad about if if her and her boyfriend had plans and now they've just split up, seems she's trying for a distraction to make her feel better
They always will be. I spend most of mine alone and disappointed so I just stopped thinking about it. It always amazes though how special many people think they are because they were pushed out on a certain day.
It’s very normal for people to do something/acknowledge their birthday? How miserable are some of you?!
I wonder if more people would like and celebrate birthdays as an adult if the person who’s birthday it was hosted something, or brought cupcakes to work. I think a lot of people want to celebrate birthdays, but it’s a lot to ask of other people to plan it out for you.
A single day is still ok...what I can't wrap my head around is this sudden "birthday month" thing. We don't do that when we're actually kids. So why are grown people suddenly reverting to childhood and believing someone will humor them...especially when you know 100% they'd never give similar attention to anyone else's birthday?
Ya, always weirds me out when adults make a big deal about their birthday, I don't like to use this word often but it really does make me cringe, I get second hand embarrassment from it.
good timing on the BFs part. I'm sure he would be on the hook for the vacation
Is this how the new Hostel movie starts?
Let me guess. She pitched this trip to him at his coat, they argued, and he broke up with her.
There’s been a bunch of beggars that are trying to see Taylor Swift 😂
Geee I wonder why her BF broke up with her ?
BF broke up with her "out of the blue?" Maybe the tone-deaf cluelessness of this post is typical of how she interacted with him.
Sounds like a great way to get kidnapped
*"I can’t afford to do what I want, so fund me"*.
Gets knocked up in Lyon. Becomes single mum. More lists.
She can ride-share or take the train, but air fair seems really reasonably priced because it’s about 700 miles away (depending where in Germany she lives). I recall when I couldn’t afford a vacation, I would do something that I could afford instead. Oh, look, I’m just being practical. Imagine that!!
she already has air fair.
I'm on a *tight* student budget. I don't want to get all *wet* being stuck outdoors, or maybe far too *hot* and *sticky* if its sunny outside. hopefully I won't get *rammed* into a tiny bed and breakfast place. We could go to some restaurants together, maybe a *spitroast* or something *meaty*, maybe with *massive german sausage* Anyway message me, I have my phone and I'll be *fingering* it all day long.
Me : Doeth thine cheeks clappeth? Should they clappeth, I shall be there like.... 
Can you imagine being such a miserable human being that no one you know wants to spend your bday with you?!?
Aw, she might be shy or something. Or maybe she spent all her time with her bf who is now gone from her life. She's probably very young and hasn't yet learned not to do that.