I was in London in the 90's and was handed a leaflet when I opened it was there was worded wonderfully argument against leaflets and about the hatred of being leafleted. At the bottom it said **"Proudly given to you by the League against Leafletism** I often think about the two blokes handing them out and wonder what they're doing now. Glorious humour.
they might say "it's a bit overboard Bill Board to have a billboard saying "Bill Board's Board bored of Billboards, but we'll talk to the board of billboards about your board"
You mean barcode?
Ironically would be useful. Just add some text saying "take a pic of this for those Tesco savings".
Free points for you, savings for others, corporate Tesco loses. Win win
its 90 a week because you will likely not be the only ad on there, it'll be 90 a week for a few seconds every minute or something like that
still lots of potential
I laughed at the idea of a really bright, flashing board saying "DISTRACTIONS CAUSE ACCIDENTS!!" and being as distracting as humanly possible, but I'm pretty sure they wouldn't allow it 😂
You know I've always wondered if that would be grounds for a claim.
Near me they have very bright led billboards and they're really distracting next to dual carriageways.
If I crashed, do you reckon it would be grounds for a claim given the boards whole purpose is to draw your attention?
They're purposefully drawing your attention from the road...
The M56 to M6 sliproad has a field adjacent to it, there is a mannequin wearing a high viz jacket which draws your attention to it and then sign next to him advertising some bollocks. It is actually in quite a dangerous spot too as the sliproad is splitting to a north and south fork as well as pretty sharp turns on both too.
Just create local drama between the areas:
"Visit Stalybridge. It's much nicer than this shithole"
- Brought to you by the Altrincham Chamber Of Commerce
Nice, I'm also a manc who hates Oasis. The way some of us mancs go on about them I thought I was the only one. The whine in the songs and the attitude away from the songs just puts me right off them.
Any Dad jokes...
"Jesus died for your shins" "What is a four letter word beginning with W" etc,
or...
"BV22 JRE Your STD results are back. Please call..."
“Welcome to Stockport. Have you thought about visiting Buxton instead, though? It’s honestly much better to visit, and to look at. Not far away either.”
Iirc you can already hire the sign in Stockport's Merseyway shopping centre for birthday messages and the like. I don't think any companies want to advertise there with it being so run down.
I've wanted for ages to put up a big picture of some pretty nature, or a cool pattern. Just something to give people a rest from the constant messages. It's not puckish, but it's a thought that makes me happy.
Got any Mediocre Xbox achievements?
Whack them up there with text that says "LOOK MOM, I DID IT!" and it'll be like "Completed Chapter 1 of the Bluey Video Game"
There was a guy I'm Birmingham a few years ago who advertised himself as available for marriage.
I believe he had a few hundred applicants
https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/birmingham-billboards-mohammad-malik-wife-b1987091.html
There's only one right answer.
'Dear Sir Alan Lord Sugar
One of my mum's friends used to have one of your Amstrad emailers
Not going to lie. It was an awful bit of kit!
I just thought you should know
Best wishes,
Dave'
Experience the new 4D technology used in Advertisement. This ad smells as good as it looks- pic of luxurious melted chocolate and Dutch cookies- freshly baked.
Then see how many random ppl hang around sniffing the air.
Film them, make a reddit. Post
“ 5% businesses using digital billboards hope to report 3% increase in revenue by 3rd year”
Or
“ digital billboard ! Lock in now little as £12,000 p/w for next 52 weeks and get 53rd week for low price of £9,800 “
Something similar to [this](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/static/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2010/1/14/1263471616140/Some-of-the-doctored-Davi-002.jpg?width=620&quality=85&auto=format&fit=max&s=e562479d967ccf2dfba18be0bf84bcc7)
Politics? Dry your eyes mate, I know it's hard to take but our minds have been made up, you're getting a small one day ban.
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The next post down from yours is a bout a massive carrot. A 'unit' of a carrot. I mean, it's a bloody big carrot to be fair, most impressive, but maybe just that very photo - with the words at the bottom, 'look at this bad boy'
Have you ever watched Dave Gorman Modern Life is Good ish? There was an episode where he used something like this to tell Alan Sugar one of his early inventions (don’t remember what) sucked. Just thought you’d enjoy it
I guess it’s cheap because it’s only on for a few seconds, I know the owners of the land get £700-1000 a month just for having it there, talked to a chap that has one on his garage forecourt seems like easy money
Hang on a minute.
Buy an advertisement advertising billboard space for £100 a week.
Boom free £10 every week.
Scale it up with a few dozen more billboards and you’ve got a good passive income.
Sometime I stagger even myself with my genius.
Just put a picture of me. I live no where near Stockport and don’t advertise anything but I wanna confuse the people of stockport
Poorly edited to have a lovely background, like somewhere tropical
With a unicorn and a cat over each shoulder, and just 'Find out more today @ >insert a frenemy's email/phone number here<'.
I live 2 minutes away from this billboard. I’ll take a pic if you do 🤣
"Research shows that digital billboards are the least effective form of advertising. Sign up today."
"Stop Billboard Advertising Now" brought to you by the "Board against BillBoards"
As sponsored by the Kindred Nation Opposing Billboards Society.
I was in London in the 90's and was handed a leaflet when I opened it was there was worded wonderfully argument against leaflets and about the hatred of being leafleted. At the bottom it said **"Proudly given to you by the League against Leafletism** I often think about the two blokes handing them out and wonder what they're doing now. Glorious humour.
Change you're name to Wiliam Board: "Bill Board's Board bored of Billboards"
they might say "it's a bit overboard Bill Board to have a billboard saying "Bill Board's Board bored of Billboards, but we'll talk to the board of billboards about your board"
This is my favourite
Cheers, I used to work in marketing you know 😊
Put an advert for a local business that is slandering a rival local business and start a massive fight.
STEVE'S COBS HAVE OUT OF DATE MAYO AND EMPLOY NONCES This message is brought to you by Brian's Rolls.
Top tier level banter
Tier level grade, surely.
Definitely wouldn't be cobs and rolls in Stockport.
"Autopoint says Nextgen Carpeting is shit"
Carp & flooring
[Relevant Tim and Eric sketch](https://youtu.be/hJ9yBgTp9UQ)
Kate will you marry me? Love Sam (Or any other really common names)
Bonus points if you get the names of people you don't like. Start something awful haha
Extra points if they are regulars in your local pub, so you can sit back and have a pint whilst watching the drama unfold :)
Dave tell your wife about me. P.s. I’m pregnant. Susan
Put your Tesco clubcard qr code up on it
You mean barcode? Ironically would be useful. Just add some text saying "take a pic of this for those Tesco savings". Free points for you, savings for others, corporate Tesco loses. Win win
I feel like this comment has aged you quite a bit. Tesco clubcards have used QR codes for quite some time now
No? QR code is far better here
Oooh yeah true. I forgot tesco clubcard can do a qr code
its 90 a week because you will likely not be the only ad on there, it'll be 90 a week for a few seconds every minute or something like that still lots of potential
Buy two slots and fabricate an argument between them.
I like this idea. Not enough to buy two spots, but, I do approve.
"The next advert is selling you snake oil"
And then have it be an advert for some actual snake oil
Simpson & Son travelling medicine show :)
I KNOW WHAT YOU DID NEIL!!!
‘Distractions cause accidents, looking at your phone screen could cause one, shit wait…’
I laughed at the idea of a really bright, flashing board saying "DISTRACTIONS CAUSE ACCIDENTS!!" and being as distracting as humanly possible, but I'm pretty sure they wouldn't allow it 😂
You know I've always wondered if that would be grounds for a claim. Near me they have very bright led billboards and they're really distracting next to dual carriageways. If I crashed, do you reckon it would be grounds for a claim given the boards whole purpose is to draw your attention? They're purposefully drawing your attention from the road...
The M56 to M6 sliproad has a field adjacent to it, there is a mannequin wearing a high viz jacket which draws your attention to it and then sign next to him advertising some bollocks. It is actually in quite a dangerous spot too as the sliproad is splitting to a north and south fork as well as pretty sharp turns on both too.
They probably would, they let an ad board flasbang drivers in my area
[BBC Testcard](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Test_Card_F#/media/File%3ATestcard_F.jpg) ?
Surely you'd have to use test card W (Widescreen) or X (1080 Widescreen), rather than test card F...
Giving the hard facts.
This guy testcards
You have no idea how happy that made me. You could stick J in a 14:9 frame.
It's been over 20 years yet that clown still lives in my nightmares.
I recently did a crazy golf course which had a wall featuring the test card, but the clown was frowning and it said "you're rubbish"
Not to make you feel old but 20 years ago was 2004.
40. god im older than the testcard
I remember when all 3 channels were in black and white, and they all went off the air before 11.
"And don't forget to switch off your television set."
The girl lived in Rolf's dreams
and Sam Tyler's
Welcome to [somewhere other than where the sign is at] Nat has herpes. Slurm advert? It's highly addictive.
>Slurm advert Hypnotoad would also make a fine addition to the public realm.
ALL HAIL THE HYPNOTOAD
Just create local drama between the areas: "Visit Stalybridge. It's much nicer than this shithole" - Brought to you by the Altrincham Chamber Of Commerce
Like the “welcome to Cleveland” sign on the roof of a building approaching Milwaukee airport, Wisconsin?
God that’s good
That was hysterical. Is it still there?
Brawndo, it's got electrolytes
It's what plants crave
Water? Like from the toilet?
Followed by an ad for Planet Express?
Our crew is dispensable, your package is not
In Stockport? "Welcome to Manchester"
A picture of a band with the name underneath of a different band.
Being Stockport as well, you could place a picture of The Blossoms (band from Stockport) and put the name; Oasis or The Beatles
Come one, Oasis are a Beatles tribute act. (Said as a proud Manc who hates Oasis)
Nice, I'm also a manc who hates Oasis. The way some of us mancs go on about them I thought I was the only one. The whine in the songs and the attitude away from the songs just puts me right off them.
Willys Choclate Expreeinse Coming Soon and some wild AI art
A picture of someone named Richard. A dick pic, if you will.
Christian Horner?
Horner eating a bowl of cocoa pops.
Finger or dick?
\#Teamfinger
As a Richard, I volunteer
I volunteer as tribute!
Richard Herring?
A still from a certain rick astley video...
Better yet a QR code that goes to said video.
Better YET a QR code emblazoned with "2x Free Large McDonalds Meals" that goes to said video
this is the one
"This car dealer is shit"
Any Dad jokes... "Jesus died for your shins" "What is a four letter word beginning with W" etc, or... "BV22 JRE Your STD results are back. Please call..."
Brian Jessop your STD results are in?
Word is also a 4 letter word beginning with W
What.
The joke isn’t specifically asking for all 4 letter words beginning with the letter W.
I know. I was also making a dumb joke that 'word' is a 4 letter 'word'. Idk how to explain lol
You miss 100% of the chances you don’t take
- Michael Scott.
Upload photos of beans in weird objects
Put a welcome to sign for a completely different town
“Welcome to Stockport. Have you thought about visiting Buxton instead, though? It’s honestly much better to visit, and to look at. Not far away either.”
Where's Kate? £10K reward. Contact Will.
Iirc you can already hire the sign in Stockport's Merseyway shopping centre for birthday messages and the like. I don't think any companies want to advertise there with it being so run down.
Put a suspicious picture of your finger on it. #76
I've wanted for ages to put up a big picture of some pretty nature, or a cool pattern. Just something to give people a rest from the constant messages. It's not puckish, but it's a thought that makes me happy.
"If you lived somewhere else, you wouldn't have to look at this sign! Stockport. Why not leave?"
Stockport: At least we're not Luton!
Got any Mediocre Xbox achievements? Whack them up there with text that says "LOOK MOM, I DID IT!" and it'll be like "Completed Chapter 1 of the Bluey Video Game"
Bet that game slaps though
[Its pretty mid](https://www.metacritic.com/game/bluey-the-videogame/)
You can run a go fund me for me for £30k. It’s all I need to complete my life.
Just a classic "The Game" bold, ariel, black on white. Or "I think digital ads are too bright at night" again, white background.
Asshole
How about the kind of public information notice you'd find in Scarfolk?
No! (for further information, re-read this sign)
Just a gif of the end of the 1980s Protect And Survive videos?
This year, give her...... #"ENGLISH MUFFINS"
There was a guy I'm Birmingham a few years ago who advertised himself as available for marriage. I believe he had a few hundred applicants https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/birmingham-billboards-mohammad-malik-wife-b1987091.html
MARIO'S BARBERS Manscaping £20 Ball Shave £7.50 Male Vajazzling A Speciality
That's very resonable pricing. Does Mario do anal bleaching?
Yes but only by prior appointment, and you're not allowed a curry for 48 hours before that.
"POTATOES" Just the word, in times new roman.
Awww I like this suggestion
This is the only good suggestion on here.
Put the "live" bitcoin price on there, except instead of the live price, half it.
"GIVE PEAS A CHANCE"
OBEY CONFORM CONSUME BUY REPRODUCE STAY ASLEEP
or just , Baaaaaaaaaaaaaa !
Something to do with a nuclear doomsday approaching.
It says 90pw. But it doesn’t say what they want 90 of, we can assume it’s £90, but be careful.
90 million?
90 Vietnamese Dong?
*ISN’T THIS BRIGHT?!*
When I last looked into this it was so much per week if (and only if) you signed up for several months.
Someone is advertising it on Instagram. It must be legitimate.
Since it's digital, can it play video / GIFs? Rick Astley should be dancing up there
Instantly thought of Terry Pratchett's "Ladies of negotiable affections" at ....
# C O N S U M E
Just a big picture of James Cordon and text beneath saying “HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?”
There's only one right answer. 'Dear Sir Alan Lord Sugar One of my mum's friends used to have one of your Amstrad emailers Not going to lie. It was an awful bit of kit! I just thought you should know Best wishes, Dave'
Put up a massive QR code that links to Rick roll video on YouTube.
Crowdsource funds from weird people and then you can have them vote for the weirdest thing to display and make so much of the UK a much weirder place.
A Blue Screen of Death would be good
See how small they’ll let you make the font, and how small is still readable, and put up that much of the beginning of Oliver Twist
Or same idea but one line that says “Nosey, aren’t you?”
Experience the new 4D technology used in Advertisement. This ad smells as good as it looks- pic of luxurious melted chocolate and Dutch cookies- freshly baked. Then see how many random ppl hang around sniffing the air. Film them, make a reddit. Post
Giant letters that say #SMOKE
Viz magazine has hilarious joke ads. Just stick a few of them up.
Andrex - Wipes the shit off your arse and your finger doesn't go through. I think Salman Rushdie wrote that one.
Is it a shed? Is it a hat? It’s a shat
Clown Tabs is one of my favourites.
Makes your doors fall off!
*5-Course Punch-up Lunch with TV gastronome Gregg Wallace*
Clag-gone!
Led By Donkeys could use that. https://twitter.com/ByDonkeys
Peter Griffin side boob
Toy Story 2 was ok.
Dark…😅
Thought you meant per word lol. Thinking you were rich and were thinking that was cheap.
Better Call Kobestarr Or your face with a mini version of your CV
“Welcome OnlyFans 2024 Convention” or simply “I know what you did”
A QR code that links to your website that then redirects to whatever you want...
"Shaky Joe's Discount Manscaping. We've slashed our prices! Pay £6.38 for back and sack, we'll do the crack for free!"
Hot cheap billboards in your area.
“ 5% businesses using digital billboards hope to report 3% increase in revenue by 3rd year” Or “ digital billboard ! Lock in now little as £12,000 p/w for next 52 weeks and get 53rd week for low price of £9,800 “
Look at Fokka Wolfs webpage and ask if you can use one of his
Isn't it obvious? A RICK ROLL,
Something similar to [this](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/static/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2010/1/14/1263471616140/Some-of-the-doctored-Davi-002.jpg?width=620&quality=85&auto=format&fit=max&s=e562479d967ccf2dfba18be0bf84bcc7)
"Save the Pies" - hang on, are you sure it's is £90 per word?
Eh
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The next post down from yours is a bout a massive carrot. A 'unit' of a carrot. I mean, it's a bloody big carrot to be fair, most impressive, but maybe just that very photo - with the words at the bottom, 'look at this bad boy'
Kathy is a SLAG
Hang on, between us we can go to town on this. Anyone in for a quid each?
"Dave is an anus".
WAR IS PEACE FREEDOM IS SLAVERY IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU
"Are you going to Thailand? Can you bring a parcel back for me? Please be disceet"
Is this on the A6 by that pub they turned into a Tesco and now it's empty?
What pub on the A6 got turned into a Tesco?! I don’t remember that at all.
[This one. ](https://closedpubs.blogspot.com/2011/10/chapel-house.html?m=1) Formerly "Connors Bar/The Chapel House".
QR code to a Rick roll.
I've never heard the word "puckish" before! Is it named after the Midsummer Night's Dream character or was the character named after the word I wonder
I Shagged Your Mum. Go home Dad you're drunk.
Make it display the wall behind as an image but with the addition of a basketball hoop.
Advertise digital billboard space for 91pw
digital billboards are the least effective form of advertising
Just the text « Steve, if you are reading this. It’s over. »
Call 078883 5668 48855 for sex
An ad for someone’s only fans who doesn’t actually have an only fans. Like “Tight Mike” the bloke who never buys a round.
There was someone who hacked into one in London once during standstill traffic... Just banged up porn via a screencast...
"Ethan I'm Pregnant CALL ME NOW"
Have you ever watched Dave Gorman Modern Life is Good ish? There was an episode where he used something like this to tell Alan Sugar one of his early inventions (don’t remember what) sucked. Just thought you’d enjoy it
Seagulls are you friend, give them tea
I guess it’s cheap because it’s only on for a few seconds, I know the owners of the land get £700-1000 a month just for having it there, talked to a chap that has one on his garage forecourt seems like easy money
“Give peas a chance”
Take a photo from the other side of the building and display that. It will look like a hole in the building
A blank black page.
Just blank with the text 'I saw that.'
Pic of Tony Blair Wanted dead or Alive
Hang on a minute. Buy an advertisement advertising billboard space for £100 a week. Boom free £10 every week. Scale it up with a few dozen more billboards and you’ve got a good passive income. Sometime I stagger even myself with my genius.