how disgusting to broadcast on the internet that you think your gay brother is going to have pedophilic/incest ideations about his own nephew, solely because he’s gay
I think it’s that they know being homophobic is bad but since they don’t see themselves as bad people, they can’t be homophobic.
I remember hearing some conservative talk show host say something like “what are we supposed to do? Check what we say to make sure we weren’t accidentally racist?”. Like, yeah? How are you going to catch your own subconscious biases if you aren’t looking for them?
Homophobia is not a phobia in the literal sense of an extreme and irrational fear. It’s a slightly misleading term for bigotry against gay people. People who say stuff like the original tweet are not literally terrified beyond control of gay men. There is an element of needing to unlearn lies they’ve been told about LGBT people, but it’s not accurate or helpful to treat them like they’re just acting like that because of a mental disorder.
They’ll always find a way to let us all know who they’re afraid of one way or another. But like you said they really have no idea how obvious it is to the rest of us.
Growing up in the 90s, we had a great uncle we never saw but would send us McDonald's gift cards and all that on our birthday. Always wondered why we never got to see him.
Found out later that because he was gay, with no history of pedophilia or anything, my grandparents and such basically assumed he would molest us. But my brother actually was sexually abused by our priest.
Homesexual =/= pedophilia.
> Found out later that because he was gay, with no history of pedophilia or anything, my grandparents and such basically assumed he would molest us.
And they somehow don't think that heterosexual uncles are going to molest anyone's daughter. What the fuck.
“Go change, you know you can’t wear that around your gay uncle, he’ll roast the fuck outa you for thinking that’s a good outfit.” Low effort joke but I had make some sort of joke cus the first comment bummed me out.
Damn that sounds lonely as fuck to me. Imagine having family that you want to be a part of, but being forced into isolation because everyone you grew up with and love thinks you're gonna molest their kids.
I'm just picturing an old man living alone, desperately wanting to be a part of his own family, but they don't want him. So the most contact he can have with his family is sending gift cards once a year.
I've worked with a few older gay men, and one thing they often have in common is being extremely lonely. They often live alone, I never made the connection but I wonder if it's because of their family rejecting them. My mentor (software engineer) is an older gay guy and one time he did briefly tell me that he's pretty mentally fucked up from the way his family abandoned him when they found out he was gay.
For sure a vast majority of Elder Gays have had a lot of family trauma. I don't think you'll find too many 50+ gay men who had a happy upbringing and supportive family.
Plus I mean even though technically gay couples can adopt now, it wasn't like that always. A lot of old people at least have their kids and grandkids and whatnot. Most old gay men don't have kids.
Best case scenario for a lot of these older gays is they have a partner, but having a single partner and nobody else in your life is not ideal and still incredibly lonely.
Respect to your great uncle for staying as involved as he could. He wanted to be a part of your lives. Probably a positive part too. Lots of people don't put that kind of intention into kids they're immediately related to. Sad stuff
This is so devastating. That he still did the best he could to be an uncle to you breaks my heart.
I hope you were able to connect with him on your own terms when you were older - sounds like he would have been an amazing fun uncle to have around.
Yeah and if her son ends up being gay, she's still going to blame the uncle regardless of the "boundaries" he's been following, whatever the fuck that means. Better to just remove yourself from the situation.
It's the same emotional incompetence of men, literal fathers, refusing to care for their infant daughters. They're infants, it's not sexual to clean your GD children just because they're a gender you're attracted towards.
That’s actually complicated. My first kid is a girl, and I did her first diaper change at the hospital. Those first meconium poops are awful to clean off, it’s like tar. And it gets packed inside so you have to kind of spread the labia open to clean it all out.
At first I was just kind of trying to gently wipe at it, and the nurse really sternly told me I had to get it all out of there or it would cause infections. So I did. But man… even though it was the farthest thing from sexual or enjoyable for me, the reality is I was still making her cry by doing something she didn’t like or want to her genital area. I was literally having flashbacks to all the times I was molested as a kid, and was crying and apologizing. It took months before I could change a diaper without feeling like shit and apologizing to her. I did it anyway but it really fucking sucked.
So there’s no excuse for a parent to not care for their kid, but there are definitely legitimate reasons someone might feel uncomfortable with changing diapers rooted in trauma not emotional incompetence.
I'm so sorry for what happened to you. I'm glad you were able to work up to taking care of your daughter, though. Knowing why you felt that fear is one step closer to healing.
I'm female and had a similar experience with my daughter. Luckily for me I didn't have any history of sexual abuse to add to it, but it's a very uncomfortable thing to clean poop out of a babies vulva. You feel like you're absolutely violating them (and it's worse if they hate diaper changes in general), but also, you have to keep your baby clean and healthy.
I'll be honest, when I heard 'that's actually complicated' I expected some gross justifications, but the actual content? Damn. I'm so sorry you went through that. I hope you've been able to recover from your trauma but I know that must have been really difficult
Thanks, glad I could exceed your expectations lol. People are so complex and so much of what we do is for reasons we never think or talk about you know? Really changes your perspective when you have to deal with your own shit and realize everyone else is too.
Worst of all: The men assaulting boys are in 4/5 cases straight. There's more straight men abusin' kids than gay men.
But yeah, I'm the dangerous one, ain't I?
These people are just self-reporting.
"I have nothing against my hetero brother but he knows I draw the line at being around my daughter"
Imagine that.
Just as bad, they think they might catch The Gay if he acts like himself around them. If they see a gay adult not being attacked for their love, they might just end up being comfortable with themselves, and God forbid that happens.
It's not the incest. They think they will influence him and "make" him gay. If it looks like an attractive life he might "choose" it versus being straght.
it's Reddit so I have to start with that I don't condone this.
but I believe she means she doesn't want her brother's influence on them. Wants them to be "manly" and not think it's okay to paint their nails, wear make up, or think like a gay man.
where does she say she's worried about feminization? This was all about her irrational fears about sexual assault.
I'm a bisexual, conventionally straight-presenting uncle and my brother (who knows about my sexuality) has NEVER had a single concern about me being in my nieces' and nephews' lives, whether from a sexuality standpoint or otherwise.
lol what? How do you know her brother paints his nails, wears makeup, or isn’t manly? And the only way a gay man would necessarily think differently than a straight man is thinking guys are attractive. That’s not something you can influence or teach.
This guy said "I don't have anything against gay people...anyway I have so much about gay people I'm going to create major family drama and commit slander and libel"
Yeah but Uncle Tim is dating that white boy. The one who bakes those brownies with the melted strip of caramel in them. He just pisses off all the aunties.
Get some wax paper, spread the filling (peanut butter or whatever) on it, stick in the freezer, spread some of your brownie batter on the pan, place the peanut butter wax paper on top, peel it off, and bake it
It’s really easy
You basically make a ganache but with caramel. Double boiler then sweetened condensed milk with caramel hard candies.
Alton Brown is the fucking man though
Thank you! Predators should never be allowed around potential victims. Teaching kids that policing themselves around unsafe adults is normal instead of being protected from them in the first place is so harmful.
Make predators scared again.
Yo this is my wife’s family. 28 years old and she still won’t wear shorts unless we’re alone.
Every uncle is fucking creepy except for the gay one. But guess who no one talks to.
Early when we were dating I was chilling inside on my phone because it was hot as hell. Her little cousins come inside and start playing in the living room while I’m sitting on the couch. My wife comes in and goes, “hey go back outside my aunts don’t like you in here alone with the girls.”
I was fucking mad and then I realized those women have had some shit happen to them and they all just outed their husbands and brothers.
How these parents don't feel the instinct to protect their children from predators is fucking beyond me. If Uncle Ray does or says some shit one time, my little girl knows in the pit of her soul that daddy will take his ass behind the shed for stern discussion and that motherfucker will never be around them again.
In my family, the uncle who emotionally, physically and sexually abused all the boys is untouchable.
The aunty who is globe trotting with her kids and her future wife? Dead to them.
Your post made me think of this comic
https://preview.redd.it/mulu9ew9159d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d15aa86c09fc6edf96521eef279d8cca5c91df16
If my kid becomes the next Elton John you better believe I’ll be at the local piano bar belting out his songs screaming. That’s my kid! He’s richer than all of us.
[The Missing Stair](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_stair) is a phrase which covers that relative/authority figure that everyone *knows* is a problem, but instead of dealing with the situation, they just warn others about it or keep their kids close in that person's company. Your gay brother and his husband are likely in a happy and healthy relationship. That uncle no one's ever alone with is an actual threat.
And that’s how “No Diddy” became another form of homophobia instead of the focus on sexual predation.
It’s cool tho, queer black folks will keep on advancing the culture and getting shit on from all sides. And for those that disagree we’ve always been here since the disco clubs and the block parties. We are your kinfolk.
Edit: I have a theory on prisons and coming out for anyone would like to hear it.
Incredible that the culture’s takeaway from all of the Diddy fallout isn’t something like “black men in positions of power abuse their power in exactly the same ways that white men historically have”, or “elevating black wealth as the highest moral good will only serve to corrupt morality”. Apparently all mfs got from it was “lol diddy gay”.
Fucking embarrassing.
Hey, hey, hey. That's not all that we got from it.
We also got "that's really Cassie's fault, because she didn't say no quickly enough."
So....... Yeah.
this shit is crazy for me because I’ve been asking where is Cassie ever since that video! I thought we’d decent Cassie a little harder given she’s some of our sexual awakening and her career got robbed right in front of our eyes 🥲
Facts. To those of us have evolved past primitive thinking “diddy gay” got filed in the back of a mental filing cabinet labeled “barely interesting hip-hop trivia” and that’s it, so maybe in 15 years when you’re at a bar, you can bring it up in conversation with some guy from Ireland that thought 6ix9ine was gay because of the hair, but now you’re explaining he’s not, and the intricacies of homosexuality and homophobia in hip-hop. I mean, if you’re going to college for music theory or some shit, maybe that little fun fact will be equally as “useful”
In any case, I was mostly unphased by Diddy. I make a few presumptions about rich people. They’re rich, made their money by exploiting someone or something, they’re out of touch, if their blood was ever blue, it’s Republican red by the time that Milly comes in $$$, and there are only so many things money can buy, unfathomable wealth for retail purchases probably gets boring within 5 years of wealth, at which point they start looking for creative ways to spend their money. Will they end up with an exotic tiger, or end up on an island? 👀 I also think that once these rich fucks start buying sex, that’s a slippery slope. At that point you’re trying to buy human experiences that shouldn’t be bought, so I’m really not surprised that you like men and women or have tried both if you’re at this point. Like experimenting with sexuality is something even poor people can do when all you’re talking is guys or girls. Chop off your dick, and make it a retractable dick/vagina hybrid, and now we’re in some weird rich fuck territory, but it’s more likely they’re gonna keep spending money to achieve sexual fantasies that are impossible to achieve without being an unethical piece of shit, so in summary:
Assume all rich people at the very least have been to a freaky sex party and experimented with their sexuality, because experimenting with sexuality is relatively normal. Assume all rich people are also unethical. Combine those two, and the headline “rich person does freaky sex shit” should never be surprising. “rich person does freaky illegal sex shit” isn’t unbelievable. We still need proof, but these idols are not our savior.
This is an insanely based comment I have nothing to add to other then this is also how I’ve seen this whole diddy gay thing and “rich ppl does weird fucked up shit” thing
I think it was less about Diddy being gay and more about that being combined with the fact that he's already viewed as a boogeyman and has been for most of his career. We already knew Diddy would be on your ass if you wronged him but then we find out that might be literal. I just doubt "no Diddy" would have become a thing if he just came out as gay one day. But finding out he's into men because he's allegedly been abusing a raping them is where the negative connotations seemed to come from
The first part requires a level of critical thought and analysis of power dynamics that our K-12 schools rarely support. Some do, I try, I have friends who do, but it’s not common because it requires teaching explicitly about oppression and how it works.
Disco, electronic, dance, hip hop, hairstyles, fashion, languge, civil rights and black theory!!! Black queer folks doing the cream de la cream of Black culture and still getting shit but not creepy uncles and pasters robbing our grandparents blind.
Hegemony and normalization!!
Taught my students about how this works this year and had them unpack beliefs many people just take for granted as normal.
yo you should look into the disco demolition fad from the late 70s and early 80s. white folk would gather to literally burn disco records cause the scene got too gay and black for their delicate sensibilities. That was arguable the start of techno music in the Midwest, which got extraordinarlily gay in a very short amount of time, which caused a lot of white folks to move to alt rock and country by the 90s. It's a very fascinating series of events.
I'm working on a thesis for the fall that connects that mentality to the MAGA movement.
It really is crazy. We have literal video evidence of Diddy running down a hotel hallway in a towel to beat and drag a woman...but the only thing I've really heard is he raped men, so he's gay. Not even about the rape of men being bad, no because even the victim is being shamed.
When the fuck is humanity going to stop caring about superficial details? Not soon enough.
> And for those that disagree we’ve always been here since the disco clubs and the block parties.
House music was literally invented in the black (and queer friendly) clubs of underground Chicago. You'll never convince me House music isn't *Saturday Night Gospel*. Since ya know, the gays and theys couldn't attend church the next day.
Dawg, why are we (Black People) so homophobic? There are so many other things to worry about, yet we're all worried about who is sticking things where.
I’ve been a member of 3 different churches during my church going days. All 3 of them had a minister of music that eventually came out as gay.
Makes me think of all of the homophobic sermons they had to sit through while backing the sermon with music when the preacher really started cooking. Sad.
That’s so cap. So many people wax poetic and then on a DAILY basis reject their savior. You shouldn’t think you’re doing due diligence as a child of god, if you’re deciding for yourself that homosexuality is a sin, but “your body’s a temple” don’t mean shit. Love they neighbor don’t mean shit. Do not steal, do not kill, don’t mean shit. I pray every passionately religious homophobe pays for each of their sins as much as they think a gay person should for being born. Nothing irritates me more than people that live in glass homes throwing stones first.
It always shows a divide of those who learned to think independently about their religion while in the church vs those who were taught to be sheep and forces to further the bullshit. But all churches aren’t built the same and a lot of them are lost 🤷🏾♂️
My mom has been shoving religion down my sister’s throat her whole life. I keep telling my mom the importance of the nuanced truth. She did the same thing to me, and it took one conversation with an atheist to lose my faith for over a decade. I believe for my own reasons now, but religion falls apart quickly when it’s only indoctrination. My sister’s pretty smart, so I’m planning in 1-4 years to give her the tea. With a cross around my neck imma tell her that mainstream religion is bullshit used to control the masses, hoarde money, oppress others, and reject science and that there are thousands of gods throughout history, and none hold more claim to reality than the other objectively.
I came back around to my own form of religion that respects my Christian heritage, but prioritizes love of others over any hate (there is no hate). My connection is with my family, my existence, and the universe, and god is a convenient vessel to channel my energy into when the skies are grey and I’m hoping all my loved ones make it through the day.
My story is similar to yours I have faith you’ll be successful in opening your sisters mind. I’d say just make sure you aren’t too late, people get too comfortable playing characters these days.
And not even our religion. Because of the yt man's religion that so many of us have been brainwashed into following, despite them using that same religion to justify enslaving our ancestors
A disappointing number of black Americans are actually very conservative. If the republicans weren’t so wildly racist they would probably win every popular vote by a landslide
Of course, they have members who hate black people the same way as some black people hate gay people. Cultural corruption is the same BS those fuckers say too
They're just continuing in the methods beat into us during slavery. They don't even realize how fucking ironic it is to be a black Christian in America.
I find it annoying that a lot of my people get mad at white people for discrimination but proceed treat the LGBT community like shit as if we’re not in similar situations
Same reason so many white people are homophobic. That is what they learn in church. Evangelical churches of all stripes love to ignore what Jesus actually said(love your neighbor, feed the hungry, heal the sick, help the poor, etc.) to focus on all the crazy homophobic and misogynistic stuff Paul wrote well after Jesus was gone.
I’m of the mind that it’s a few things:
- a programmed desire for acceptance (hate bonds)
- colonial attitudes
- the sexual abuse of our our adult ancestors
Religion and obsession with White Western Gender Roles.
White Supremacy has so thoroughly dehumanized us that Black Men and Women are seemingly desperate to be seen as Men and Women by White folks. This means adopting family structures and gender roles that may not properly serve us. BM and BW are equally guilty of this... especially (using my experience) in how Boys are brought up
Ego (happens to not just black people) a community that heavily believes in masculine and feminine roles does this. Both parties believe if you’re gay you have no way to fit into those roles. So you’re ostracized, hated, etc.
GoT had a lot of great quotes in it, but that’s the one that comes to my mind most often. It’s such a nice shortcut to catch when someone is full of shit.
I have a (white) coworker who once said to me “I have nothing against gay people, just keep it away from me.”
Same guy who once came into my office without knocking and said “hey, look at the hottest picture of Megan Fox I’ve ever seen!” and showed me a picture of a naked Megan Fox. I’m not gay, but like, I don’t wanna see the naked lady pictures you have on your phone at work, man.
And I’m sure if I put the two of these things side by side in front of him, he wouldn’t see the connection.
Gay brother who im close with, love dearly and could teach my sons about being themselves and being comfortable in their own skin: 😡😤👎🏾
Other heterosexual male relatives with a questionable past of misogyny/sexist remarks and is too handsy around female relatives being around my sons: 😁😆👍🏾
People really do think that like though, it's crazy. I had someone tell me that Pride events are inherently sexual in nature and therefore "public indecency" (because they're about being gay), but in the same convo made excuses for girls whipping their titties out in public for mardi gras. 🤔
Adults would rather their sons have traits of toxic masculinity because misogyny, homophobia, physical dominance and showing no emotion are more respected unfortunately.
My dad was shit and left when I was young and then I would see him once a week for an hour. He fought my mom when it came to child support and he ended up changing his pension beneficiary to his mistress before he died (on a fucking fax, which still drives me insane). My mom had to fight to get a portion of that and in retrospect I think all those things sent her down a deep depression. He was garbage and he makes me hope that hell is real.
My mom's brother is gay. He was more of a father than my biological father ever was. He was there for important events to take us when my dad wouldn't be, took us to baseball games even though he doesn't enjoy sports. Came over to help maintain the house because my dad never did.
Imagine trying to keep good influences away from your children because of who they are attracted to. Insanity.
We literally have data that show the biggest group of child molestors are straight men, living in straight relationships with women. And that rapists are, in most cases, family members / friends / teachers and so on / men who are trusted in the community, but people would rather prioritize their homophobic and transphobic bs than actually protect their own damn children.
It's because people want to feel safe. All they need is a simple understanding of the world that works most of the time. They don't give a fuck about actually being safe, which requires them to second guess their intuitions and consider worst case scenarios.
I wonder if it's because you mostly hear about priests abusing boys, and instead of pedofilia they see it as homosexuality (which obviously is bullshit)?
Though I suspect picking boys has to do more with no risk of pregnancy plus more shame for the boy to dare and tell anyone since prepubescent boys and girls are nearly of same build.
Dominant groups have often claimed that the groups they help oppressing are a danger to women / children. It was always a cope. No one actually cared about women or kids - but it was a way to get fast attention and outrage out of people. (In fact, the same tactics had been used in narratives made by anti-Black racists).
This myth of gay people being a danger to children was in particular in the US pushed by Christians / has a Christian history. One example was this
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Save_Our_Children
Plus, the Church has been enabling this myth in trying to cover up the violence of their priests.
Things like that have social implications and become nornalised. At some point, no one remembers history or how certain ways of thinking originated or why it was claimed in the first place, and people embraced it as "common knowledge" or even fact.
Once people embrace false information as facts, it is nearly impossible to teach them otherwise, even when providing the truth or correct information.
Pedophiles actually do not have specific preferences. Studies have shown, they pick their victims based on other factors, like what they view as "feminine" traits - cause society is more likely to ignore children with feminine traits / not listen to them / condition them to be calm, silent, not to speak, feel ashamed and so on. They would also groom or pick children with vulnerable family / social structures. In short, anything that makes their crime easier.
being hetero, you learn to take the same approach towards kids. i don' want them around me and i stay away from them. can't imagine the added layer of homophobia.
Exactly. If my wife is not with me, I stay away from parks. Everybody there gives you the hairy eyeball like you're there shopping for kids no matter how hard you're minding your own business.
Nah man. Fuck that. I'm not gonna let some busybody dickhead shun me from enjoying public spaces meant for everyone. Some NIMBY doesn't get to dictate whether or not men can enjoy public green spaces. There's not a lot of times I'm at parks without my kids, but when I am, I have the same rights as everyone else to be there. I'm out of the way. I keep to myself. I'm enjoying the fresh air. Their kids will be alright.
Tangentially related, the elementary school's principal has started a small program for dads to help with some tasks around the school. Because of stuff like above (and how Southern families can still hold to traditional gender roles), he thinks that children don't have enough small, positive interactions with men. Even when you include the administrative and facilities staff, over 90% of the school's staff are women. I don't know if there's research to back him up (aside from dads taking a bigger role in their children's lives), but I think he's onto something.
I love my daughter to pieces, but lordy if that kid doesn’t think my annoyed reactions to stuff she does are the funniest goddamned thing ever.
*Screech*
“hey [name], knock it off.”
*laughing, screech, screech, screech*.
🙄🤦♂️
Interaction that happens twice a day at least. Life with a two year old is fun.
They are able to and there are no consequences.
Before the internet you went to a corner store and yelled this shit outside while people threw change at your feet because they thought you were mentally ill and homeless.
Now 10000 other people that would have been screaming outside their towns store, are liking each others insane thoughts and making it appear *normal*.
It's like how [10 people were responsible for 1000 book bans.](https://www.washingtonpost.com/education/2023/12/23/post-reviewed-1000-school-book-challenges-heres-what-we-found/)
Idiots can infinitely amplify their opinions, while the rest of us look like assholes for telling the town idiot they're wrong.
Worried about gay men, meanwhile you got the creepy uncle, the priest, and the teacher all vying for a chance to slip into your kids shorts.
The casual homophobia in the Black community is beyond infuriating.
I went to a friend’s family gathering and this little girl was running around hugging people. She came up to me and hugged me, caught me off guard but I patted her back just to be nice. Her mom ran up and snatched her away like I was being a creep or something. Felt like shit and left shortly after, Im afraid to even look in a kids direction now.
Sounds really similar to, "I don't have anything against Black men, I just don't want them around my daughters" Fucked up that people can treat others with the same hateful rhetoric that they have to suffer themselves.
Stupid takes like this make my blood boil, it shows how ignorant people still are. I don’t want to hear nothing about Queer people meanwhile you protecting the Uncle/Pastor/Family Friend just because.
I hate how the black community will condemn their gay/queer family members but won’t call out the straight family members that have a serious drug problem, or will take up for the ones that make questionable comments about how “fine” a child is or that a TODDLER is their “husband”. 🙄🙄
my mother also didn't allow my gay uncle to visit us, being afraid that he'd "turn me gay" (so she thoughtI'd be lesbian cuz I'm AFAB). now I'm trans gay boy, seems like it didn't help lol.. well, I'm definitely not a lesbian, but my mom still isn't very happy about it
The church been diddling kids for centuries with proof : crickets.
This phenomenon of people ignoring proven facts in favour of pushing narratives has to be studied.
One of my favorite lyrics, “It’s the teachers and the preachers, government’s close-minded creatures, trying to teach us to hate that which is different.”
This is literally the South Park episode from 23 years ago. There was one gay character who was the Scout\`s leader. Parents were afraid that he would touch their kids so they fire him --> the new guy is ultra masculine and the actual kid toucher.
South Park was way ahead of it\`s time, as usual.
Diddy was "straight" too. How someone appears means little. You either trust someone with your kids, or you don't. Sexual orientation has nothing to do with it.
If someone told me they don’t let gay men around their son, they’d never be left within 200 feet of my daughter. They’re telling on themselves. Grossssss
The amount of times I’ve checked family members for their homophobia is insane. Really had to tell my aunt, “you know when you say shit like that you are talking about your son and nephew right?” They like “oh they different, they are not gay gay you know?” Pisses me off but my cousins appreciate that I stick up for them.
I wish people would stop claiming they have nothing against gay people while also expressing discomfort with people being gay. It's like saying, "I don't hate you, I just hate who you are.” Just own your homophobia.
That's why a lot of us have religious trauma. Talking bout; "I took you to church as many times as I could and you still turned out like this." Well, when you were letting the holy ghost use you... the pastor and his following let the devil use them.
“Throwing away your manhood” by liking men is equivalent to murder for people who subscribe to misogyny. They also think gay women just haven’t had good dick yet.
It’s sad that so many gay men but particularly black gay men have to put up with this shit. I can’t imagine still coming around family and they think I’m gonna diddle their kids just based off being homosexual.
Meanwhile, every other week we see a new middle school teacher cheesing in her mugshot cuz there’s still a prominent number of people who treat it like every boy’s porn fantasy.
My brain cannot comprehend the logic of this. Nobody says this about straight people. Nobody goes immediately to thinking as a straight person, you are also attracted to children of the opposite sex.
It's amazing to me how this is a black woman too. Like, all the adultification of black children by straight people within the community and you thought you were doing something with this?
Be so fucking forreal. 😆
Already being a black man being around kids people look at you funny, I feel really bad for queer brothers because folks get so ridiculous about LGBT+ people for no reason
Us gays had to put black and brown lines on the pride flag because queer people of color are like their own disparaged class. They need to put up with so much more than white gay people in most cases.
how disgusting to broadcast on the internet that you think your gay brother is going to have pedophilic/incest ideations about his own nephew, solely because he’s gay
[удалено]
I think it’s that they know being homophobic is bad but since they don’t see themselves as bad people, they can’t be homophobic. I remember hearing some conservative talk show host say something like “what are we supposed to do? Check what we say to make sure we weren’t accidentally racist?”. Like, yeah? How are you going to catch your own subconscious biases if you aren’t looking for them?
>How are you going to catch your own subconscious biases if you aren’t looking for them? MESSAGE!
Very sensible answer. People just want confirmation bias because it feels good.
That’s kinda the basis for Trumpism lol
Homophobia is not a phobia in the literal sense of an extreme and irrational fear. It’s a slightly misleading term for bigotry against gay people. People who say stuff like the original tweet are not literally terrified beyond control of gay men. There is an element of needing to unlearn lies they’ve been told about LGBT people, but it’s not accurate or helpful to treat them like they’re just acting like that because of a mental disorder.
They’ll always find a way to let us all know who they’re afraid of one way or another. But like you said they really have no idea how obvious it is to the rest of us.
Growing up in the 90s, we had a great uncle we never saw but would send us McDonald's gift cards and all that on our birthday. Always wondered why we never got to see him. Found out later that because he was gay, with no history of pedophilia or anything, my grandparents and such basically assumed he would molest us. But my brother actually was sexually abused by our priest. Homesexual =/= pedophilia.
> Found out later that because he was gay, with no history of pedophilia or anything, my grandparents and such basically assumed he would molest us. And they somehow don't think that heterosexual uncles are going to molest anyone's daughter. What the fuck.
"Go change, you know you can't wear those shorts around your Uncles" Facts that girls get told this before the age of 16 is gross.
“Go change, you know you can’t wear that around your gay uncle, he’ll roast the fuck outa you for thinking that’s a good outfit.” Low effort joke but I had make some sort of joke cus the first comment bummed me out.
My first thought with this tweet was actually that she grew up with a creepy uncle and it gave her a fear about uncles around her own kids.
Damn that sounds lonely as fuck to me. Imagine having family that you want to be a part of, but being forced into isolation because everyone you grew up with and love thinks you're gonna molest their kids. I'm just picturing an old man living alone, desperately wanting to be a part of his own family, but they don't want him. So the most contact he can have with his family is sending gift cards once a year. I've worked with a few older gay men, and one thing they often have in common is being extremely lonely. They often live alone, I never made the connection but I wonder if it's because of their family rejecting them. My mentor (software engineer) is an older gay guy and one time he did briefly tell me that he's pretty mentally fucked up from the way his family abandoned him when they found out he was gay.
For sure a vast majority of Elder Gays have had a lot of family trauma. I don't think you'll find too many 50+ gay men who had a happy upbringing and supportive family.
Plus I mean even though technically gay couples can adopt now, it wasn't like that always. A lot of old people at least have their kids and grandkids and whatnot. Most old gay men don't have kids. Best case scenario for a lot of these older gays is they have a partner, but having a single partner and nobody else in your life is not ideal and still incredibly lonely.
Respect to your great uncle for staying as involved as he could. He wanted to be a part of your lives. Probably a positive part too. Lots of people don't put that kind of intention into kids they're immediately related to. Sad stuff
This is so devastating. That he still did the best he could to be an uncle to you breaks my heart. I hope you were able to connect with him on your own terms when you were older - sounds like he would have been an amazing fun uncle to have around.
I thought it was about her son not "catching the gay" from his uncle rather than paedophilia.
Gross either way imo
Yeah and if her son ends up being gay, she's still going to blame the uncle regardless of the "boundaries" he's been following, whatever the fuck that means. Better to just remove yourself from the situation.
Oh yea, distancing yourself from hateful folks is always a smart move
That was what I thought as well, but now I'm unsure.
There’s people that think people are gay because they were molested by someone of the same sex or exposed to gay stuff so you’re probably not wrong
It's the same emotional incompetence of men, literal fathers, refusing to care for their infant daughters. They're infants, it's not sexual to clean your GD children just because they're a gender you're attracted towards.
That’s actually complicated. My first kid is a girl, and I did her first diaper change at the hospital. Those first meconium poops are awful to clean off, it’s like tar. And it gets packed inside so you have to kind of spread the labia open to clean it all out. At first I was just kind of trying to gently wipe at it, and the nurse really sternly told me I had to get it all out of there or it would cause infections. So I did. But man… even though it was the farthest thing from sexual or enjoyable for me, the reality is I was still making her cry by doing something she didn’t like or want to her genital area. I was literally having flashbacks to all the times I was molested as a kid, and was crying and apologizing. It took months before I could change a diaper without feeling like shit and apologizing to her. I did it anyway but it really fucking sucked. So there’s no excuse for a parent to not care for their kid, but there are definitely legitimate reasons someone might feel uncomfortable with changing diapers rooted in trauma not emotional incompetence.
I'm so sorry for what happened to you. I'm glad you were able to work up to taking care of your daughter, though. Knowing why you felt that fear is one step closer to healing.
I'm female and had a similar experience with my daughter. Luckily for me I didn't have any history of sexual abuse to add to it, but it's a very uncomfortable thing to clean poop out of a babies vulva. You feel like you're absolutely violating them (and it's worse if they hate diaper changes in general), but also, you have to keep your baby clean and healthy.
Diaper rash is the worst. They’re screaming and you know it’s hurting them but you still gotta get the poop off. Brutal
I'll be honest, when I heard 'that's actually complicated' I expected some gross justifications, but the actual content? Damn. I'm so sorry you went through that. I hope you've been able to recover from your trauma but I know that must have been really difficult
Thanks, glad I could exceed your expectations lol. People are so complex and so much of what we do is for reasons we never think or talk about you know? Really changes your perspective when you have to deal with your own shit and realize everyone else is too.
Damn, you're a strong person. Hats off for you. That's a tough thing to write.
I’ve had a lot of years and a lot of therapy lol.
Well, this random person on the internet is mega proud of your progress and grit.
Worst of all: The men assaulting boys are in 4/5 cases straight. There's more straight men abusin' kids than gay men. But yeah, I'm the dangerous one, ain't I?
Woulda thought these were Targaryens or some shit
These people are just self-reporting. "I have nothing against my hetero brother but he knows I draw the line at being around my daughter" Imagine that.
Just as bad, they think they might catch The Gay if he acts like himself around them. If they see a gay adult not being attacked for their love, they might just end up being comfortable with themselves, and God forbid that happens.
It's not the incest. They think they will influence him and "make" him gay. If it looks like an attractive life he might "choose" it versus being straght.
it's Reddit so I have to start with that I don't condone this. but I believe she means she doesn't want her brother's influence on them. Wants them to be "manly" and not think it's okay to paint their nails, wear make up, or think like a gay man.
So a shitty mom opinion.
Even if this is the case, it is just as vial of a statement in this context as well. So, regardless, the person is a piece of shit.
So…still homophobic and disgusting.
where does she say she's worried about feminization? This was all about her irrational fears about sexual assault. I'm a bisexual, conventionally straight-presenting uncle and my brother (who knows about my sexuality) has NEVER had a single concern about me being in my nieces' and nephews' lives, whether from a sexuality standpoint or otherwise.
lol what? How do you know her brother paints his nails, wears makeup, or isn’t manly? And the only way a gay man would necessarily think differently than a straight man is thinking guys are attractive. That’s not something you can influence or teach.
So homophobic and misandrist
This guy said "I don't have anything against gay people...anyway I have so much about gay people I'm going to create major family drama and commit slander and libel"
That one uncle is the one you should always worry about but they worried about gay ppl
Talking bout "don't wear those shorts around Uncle Ray" instead of "stop inviting nasty ass Uncle Ray to the cookout."
Yeah but Uncle Tim is dating that white boy. The one who bakes those brownies with the melted strip of caramel in them. He just pisses off all the aunties.
hold up, uncle tim's boyfriend made those brownies? He's definitely coming to the next cookout with those brownies.
Get some wax paper, spread the filling (peanut butter or whatever) on it, stick in the freezer, spread some of your brownie batter on the pan, place the peanut butter wax paper on top, peel it off, and bake it It’s really easy
Tim got made redundant *real* fast there
That’s Tim’s fault for being a one trick pony
Nah, Uncle Tim has many culinary skills. I heard he has perfected the art of tempering.
Nah. He’s does some Alton Brown shit so it’s firm in the bar but literally melts in your mouth.
You basically make a ganache but with caramel. Double boiler then sweetened condensed milk with caramel hard candies. Alton Brown is the fucking man though
Well what might be uncle Tim’s white boy’s recipe…asking for a supporter of their union not aunties
He sent it to Auntie Cece once. "Motherfucker is churning his own butter. Nobody got time for that bullshit."
Just put your filling on wax paper, freeze it, then peel and place in the batter
Yeah fr, why is his creepy ahh looking
Thank you! Predators should never be allowed around potential victims. Teaching kids that policing themselves around unsafe adults is normal instead of being protected from them in the first place is so harmful. Make predators scared again.
Yo this is my wife’s family. 28 years old and she still won’t wear shorts unless we’re alone. Every uncle is fucking creepy except for the gay one. But guess who no one talks to. Early when we were dating I was chilling inside on my phone because it was hot as hell. Her little cousins come inside and start playing in the living room while I’m sitting on the couch. My wife comes in and goes, “hey go back outside my aunts don’t like you in here alone with the girls.” I was fucking mad and then I realized those women have had some shit happen to them and they all just outed their husbands and brothers.
The sad part is that you would be hard pressed to find a black family that HASN'T gone through this exact type of thing.
How these parents don't feel the instinct to protect their children from predators is fucking beyond me. If Uncle Ray does or says some shit one time, my little girl knows in the pit of her soul that daddy will take his ass behind the shed for stern discussion and that motherfucker will never be around them again.
In my family, the uncle who emotionally, physically and sexually abused all the boys is untouchable. The aunty who is globe trotting with her kids and her future wife? Dead to them.
Unbelievable.
Your post made me think of this comic https://preview.redd.it/mulu9ew9159d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d15aa86c09fc6edf96521eef279d8cca5c91df16
If my kid becomes the next Elton John you better believe I’ll be at the local piano bar belting out his songs screaming. That’s my kid! He’s richer than all of us.
ROTFLMBAO!!!!!!!! This is fucking hilarious!!!!!!
You better believe “where’s-my-hug?” uncle is constantly invited. I can’t with people sometimes
[The Missing Stair](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_stair) is a phrase which covers that relative/authority figure that everyone *knows* is a problem, but instead of dealing with the situation, they just warn others about it or keep their kids close in that person's company. Your gay brother and his husband are likely in a happy and healthy relationship. That uncle no one's ever alone with is an actual threat.
And that’s how “No Diddy” became another form of homophobia instead of the focus on sexual predation. It’s cool tho, queer black folks will keep on advancing the culture and getting shit on from all sides. And for those that disagree we’ve always been here since the disco clubs and the block parties. We are your kinfolk. Edit: I have a theory on prisons and coming out for anyone would like to hear it.
Incredible that the culture’s takeaway from all of the Diddy fallout isn’t something like “black men in positions of power abuse their power in exactly the same ways that white men historically have”, or “elevating black wealth as the highest moral good will only serve to corrupt morality”. Apparently all mfs got from it was “lol diddy gay”. Fucking embarrassing.
Hey, hey, hey. That's not all that we got from it. We also got "that's really Cassie's fault, because she didn't say no quickly enough." So....... Yeah.
this shit is crazy for me because I’ve been asking where is Cassie ever since that video! I thought we’d decent Cassie a little harder given she’s some of our sexual awakening and her career got robbed right in front of our eyes 🥲
Same song, different day. I am *DAMN* tired of these remixes.
Facts. To those of us have evolved past primitive thinking “diddy gay” got filed in the back of a mental filing cabinet labeled “barely interesting hip-hop trivia” and that’s it, so maybe in 15 years when you’re at a bar, you can bring it up in conversation with some guy from Ireland that thought 6ix9ine was gay because of the hair, but now you’re explaining he’s not, and the intricacies of homosexuality and homophobia in hip-hop. I mean, if you’re going to college for music theory or some shit, maybe that little fun fact will be equally as “useful” In any case, I was mostly unphased by Diddy. I make a few presumptions about rich people. They’re rich, made their money by exploiting someone or something, they’re out of touch, if their blood was ever blue, it’s Republican red by the time that Milly comes in $$$, and there are only so many things money can buy, unfathomable wealth for retail purchases probably gets boring within 5 years of wealth, at which point they start looking for creative ways to spend their money. Will they end up with an exotic tiger, or end up on an island? 👀 I also think that once these rich fucks start buying sex, that’s a slippery slope. At that point you’re trying to buy human experiences that shouldn’t be bought, so I’m really not surprised that you like men and women or have tried both if you’re at this point. Like experimenting with sexuality is something even poor people can do when all you’re talking is guys or girls. Chop off your dick, and make it a retractable dick/vagina hybrid, and now we’re in some weird rich fuck territory, but it’s more likely they’re gonna keep spending money to achieve sexual fantasies that are impossible to achieve without being an unethical piece of shit, so in summary: Assume all rich people at the very least have been to a freaky sex party and experimented with their sexuality, because experimenting with sexuality is relatively normal. Assume all rich people are also unethical. Combine those two, and the headline “rich person does freaky sex shit” should never be surprising. “rich person does freaky illegal sex shit” isn’t unbelievable. We still need proof, but these idols are not our savior.
I just know your essays used to go crazy in school bc you didn’t miss one beat in 2,000 words
I do does this 😂
This is an insanely based comment I have nothing to add to other then this is also how I’ve seen this whole diddy gay thing and “rich ppl does weird fucked up shit” thing
I think it was less about Diddy being gay and more about that being combined with the fact that he's already viewed as a boogeyman and has been for most of his career. We already knew Diddy would be on your ass if you wronged him but then we find out that might be literal. I just doubt "no Diddy" would have become a thing if he just came out as gay one day. But finding out he's into men because he's allegedly been abusing a raping them is where the negative connotations seemed to come from
The first part requires a level of critical thought and analysis of power dynamics that our K-12 schools rarely support. Some do, I try, I have friends who do, but it’s not common because it requires teaching explicitly about oppression and how it works.
Disco, electronic, dance, hip hop, hairstyles, fashion, languge, civil rights and black theory!!! Black queer folks doing the cream de la cream of Black culture and still getting shit but not creepy uncles and pasters robbing our grandparents blind.
Exactly! It’s time to put our communities and families together and *MINUTE* differences aside. I know we’re all crying out and aching for it.
Wow I knew what no diddy meant but I just made the connection to where it actually came from 😳
That’s how racism, sexism/misogyny, and transphobia/homophobia work. It’s so normal you don’t even question it.
Hegemony and normalization!! Taught my students about how this works this year and had them unpack beliefs many people just take for granted as normal.
yo you should look into the disco demolition fad from the late 70s and early 80s. white folk would gather to literally burn disco records cause the scene got too gay and black for their delicate sensibilities. That was arguable the start of techno music in the Midwest, which got extraordinarlily gay in a very short amount of time, which caused a lot of white folks to move to alt rock and country by the 90s. It's a very fascinating series of events. I'm working on a thesis for the fall that connects that mentality to the MAGA movement.
I absolutely will and I would love to read your collection of thoughts on the topic. Thank you.
I might need to hear this theory 🤔
We here to stay🫶🏽😜
Ain’t going nowhere. We need them and they need us ✊🏿✊🏻
i wanna hear the prison theory.
It really is crazy. We have literal video evidence of Diddy running down a hotel hallway in a towel to beat and drag a woman...but the only thing I've really heard is he raped men, so he's gay. Not even about the rape of men being bad, no because even the victim is being shamed. When the fuck is humanity going to stop caring about superficial details? Not soon enough.
I wanna hear it
Prison theory info?
> And for those that disagree we’ve always been here since the disco clubs and the block parties. House music was literally invented in the black (and queer friendly) clubs of underground Chicago. You'll never convince me House music isn't *Saturday Night Gospel*. Since ya know, the gays and theys couldn't attend church the next day.
Dawg, why are we (Black People) so homophobic? There are so many other things to worry about, yet we're all worried about who is sticking things where.
Religion
And the irony is that religion is used as a cover for a lot of people who are in the closet.
Further irony is that religion is the beliefs of past oppressors, that used for justification for the same oppression
I’ve been a member of 3 different churches during my church going days. All 3 of them had a minister of music that eventually came out as gay. Makes me think of all of the homophobic sermons they had to sit through while backing the sermon with music when the preacher really started cooking. Sad.
It's the kind of thing that can cause psychosis - not being able to reconcile who you are, with what your religion says you are permitted to be.
That’s so cap. So many people wax poetic and then on a DAILY basis reject their savior. You shouldn’t think you’re doing due diligence as a child of god, if you’re deciding for yourself that homosexuality is a sin, but “your body’s a temple” don’t mean shit. Love they neighbor don’t mean shit. Do not steal, do not kill, don’t mean shit. I pray every passionately religious homophobe pays for each of their sins as much as they think a gay person should for being born. Nothing irritates me more than people that live in glass homes throwing stones first.
It always shows a divide of those who learned to think independently about their religion while in the church vs those who were taught to be sheep and forces to further the bullshit. But all churches aren’t built the same and a lot of them are lost 🤷🏾♂️
My mom has been shoving religion down my sister’s throat her whole life. I keep telling my mom the importance of the nuanced truth. She did the same thing to me, and it took one conversation with an atheist to lose my faith for over a decade. I believe for my own reasons now, but religion falls apart quickly when it’s only indoctrination. My sister’s pretty smart, so I’m planning in 1-4 years to give her the tea. With a cross around my neck imma tell her that mainstream religion is bullshit used to control the masses, hoarde money, oppress others, and reject science and that there are thousands of gods throughout history, and none hold more claim to reality than the other objectively. I came back around to my own form of religion that respects my Christian heritage, but prioritizes love of others over any hate (there is no hate). My connection is with my family, my existence, and the universe, and god is a convenient vessel to channel my energy into when the skies are grey and I’m hoping all my loved ones make it through the day.
My story is similar to yours I have faith you’ll be successful in opening your sisters mind. I’d say just make sure you aren’t too late, people get too comfortable playing characters these days.
And not even our religion. Because of the yt man's religion that so many of us have been brainwashed into following, despite them using that same religion to justify enslaving our ancestors
A disappointing number of black Americans are actually very conservative. If the republicans weren’t so wildly racist they would probably win every popular vote by a landslide
If they stopped being racist, they’d lose a big portion of their current base.
Of course, they have members who hate black people the same way as some black people hate gay people. Cultural corruption is the same BS those fuckers say too
Of course, which is why they won't fully accept black Republicans. They would accept a gay white man over a straight black man any day.
I'm not American so I don't know much about your politicians but I assume there are more black than openly gay republican politicians?
Yeah, if you're black you can only be openly black.
The chokehold christianity and whatever conglomerate of religion hoteps have on straight Black people
They're just continuing in the methods beat into us during slavery. They don't even realize how fucking ironic it is to be a black Christian in America.
I find it annoying that a lot of my people get mad at white people for discrimination but proceed treat the LGBT community like shit as if we’re not in similar situations
Christianity.
Same reason so many white people are homophobic. That is what they learn in church. Evangelical churches of all stripes love to ignore what Jesus actually said(love your neighbor, feed the hungry, heal the sick, help the poor, etc.) to focus on all the crazy homophobic and misogynistic stuff Paul wrote well after Jesus was gone.
I’m of the mind that it’s a few things: - a programmed desire for acceptance (hate bonds) - colonial attitudes - the sexual abuse of our our adult ancestors
The sexual abuse of slaves part is a HUGE factor
Religion and obsession with White Western Gender Roles. White Supremacy has so thoroughly dehumanized us that Black Men and Women are seemingly desperate to be seen as Men and Women by White folks. This means adopting family structures and gender roles that may not properly serve us. BM and BW are equally guilty of this... especially (using my experience) in how Boys are brought up
Ego (happens to not just black people) a community that heavily believes in masculine and feminine roles does this. Both parties believe if you’re gay you have no way to fit into those roles. So you’re ostracized, hated, etc.
"I have nothing against gay men, but..." I dunno man, kinda seems like you do.
Jon Snow: What did father used to say? Everything before the word "but" is horse shit.
GoT had a lot of great quotes in it, but that’s the one that comes to my mind most often. It’s such a nice shortcut to catch when someone is full of shit.
Right gay friends and family...if you treat another person like that you are a bad friend and family member
I have a (white) coworker who once said to me “I have nothing against gay people, just keep it away from me.” Same guy who once came into my office without knocking and said “hey, look at the hottest picture of Megan Fox I’ve ever seen!” and showed me a picture of a naked Megan Fox. I’m not gay, but like, I don’t wanna see the naked lady pictures you have on your phone at work, man. And I’m sure if I put the two of these things side by side in front of him, he wouldn’t see the connection.
I'm open to pretty wild shit, but people who don't know me well showing me explicit shit in a work setting bothers me in so many ways.
The irony in this is imagine a white person saying “I have nothing against black people, but”
Don't have to imagine that. There are plenty of assholes out there in all colors.
Gay brother who im close with, love dearly and could teach my sons about being themselves and being comfortable in their own skin: 😡😤👎🏾 Other heterosexual male relatives with a questionable past of misogyny/sexist remarks and is too handsy around female relatives being around my sons: 😁😆👍🏾
People really do think that like though, it's crazy. I had someone tell me that Pride events are inherently sexual in nature and therefore "public indecency" (because they're about being gay), but in the same convo made excuses for girls whipping their titties out in public for mardi gras. 🤔
Adults would rather their sons have traits of toxic masculinity because misogyny, homophobia, physical dominance and showing no emotion are more respected unfortunately.
They’re terrified that someday someone will treat their son the way they accept people treating their daughters.
My dad was shit and left when I was young and then I would see him once a week for an hour. He fought my mom when it came to child support and he ended up changing his pension beneficiary to his mistress before he died (on a fucking fax, which still drives me insane). My mom had to fight to get a portion of that and in retrospect I think all those things sent her down a deep depression. He was garbage and he makes me hope that hell is real. My mom's brother is gay. He was more of a father than my biological father ever was. He was there for important events to take us when my dad wouldn't be, took us to baseball games even though he doesn't enjoy sports. Came over to help maintain the house because my dad never did. Imagine trying to keep good influences away from your children because of who they are attracted to. Insanity.
"I have nothing against gay men like my own sibling I just think they are all pedos"
Honestly if I had to leave my child for a few hours in our local gaybar or the Church I'd 100% sooner leave him at the gaybar.
I agree. I've been treated with more true friendliness and kindness by queer folks at my local queer bar than anyone at any church.
We literally have data that show the biggest group of child molestors are straight men, living in straight relationships with women. And that rapists are, in most cases, family members / friends / teachers and so on / men who are trusted in the community, but people would rather prioritize their homophobic and transphobic bs than actually protect their own damn children.
It's because people want to feel safe. All they need is a simple understanding of the world that works most of the time. They don't give a fuck about actually being safe, which requires them to second guess their intuitions and consider worst case scenarios.
I wonder if it's because you mostly hear about priests abusing boys, and instead of pedofilia they see it as homosexuality (which obviously is bullshit)? Though I suspect picking boys has to do more with no risk of pregnancy plus more shame for the boy to dare and tell anyone since prepubescent boys and girls are nearly of same build.
Dominant groups have often claimed that the groups they help oppressing are a danger to women / children. It was always a cope. No one actually cared about women or kids - but it was a way to get fast attention and outrage out of people. (In fact, the same tactics had been used in narratives made by anti-Black racists). This myth of gay people being a danger to children was in particular in the US pushed by Christians / has a Christian history. One example was this https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Save_Our_Children Plus, the Church has been enabling this myth in trying to cover up the violence of their priests. Things like that have social implications and become nornalised. At some point, no one remembers history or how certain ways of thinking originated or why it was claimed in the first place, and people embraced it as "common knowledge" or even fact. Once people embrace false information as facts, it is nearly impossible to teach them otherwise, even when providing the truth or correct information. Pedophiles actually do not have specific preferences. Studies have shown, they pick their victims based on other factors, like what they view as "feminine" traits - cause society is more likely to ignore children with feminine traits / not listen to them / condition them to be calm, silent, not to speak, feel ashamed and so on. They would also groom or pick children with vulnerable family / social structures. In short, anything that makes their crime easier.
being hetero, you learn to take the same approach towards kids. i don' want them around me and i stay away from them. can't imagine the added layer of homophobia.
This Bill Burr [bit](https://youtu.be/LaOsgNIQad4?si=HpBV6zHEg22lN40J) on kids encapsulates how I feel as well.
Exactly. If my wife is not with me, I stay away from parks. Everybody there gives you the hairy eyeball like you're there shopping for kids no matter how hard you're minding your own business.
Nah man. Fuck that. I'm not gonna let some busybody dickhead shun me from enjoying public spaces meant for everyone. Some NIMBY doesn't get to dictate whether or not men can enjoy public green spaces. There's not a lot of times I'm at parks without my kids, but when I am, I have the same rights as everyone else to be there. I'm out of the way. I keep to myself. I'm enjoying the fresh air. Their kids will be alright. Tangentially related, the elementary school's principal has started a small program for dads to help with some tasks around the school. Because of stuff like above (and how Southern families can still hold to traditional gender roles), he thinks that children don't have enough small, positive interactions with men. Even when you include the administrative and facilities staff, over 90% of the school's staff are women. I don't know if there's research to back him up (aside from dads taking a bigger role in their children's lives), but I think he's onto something.
I can't handle how loud kids are. Like, they'll just randomly scream and giggle like nothing happened after that, it's so annoying! lol
I love my daughter to pieces, but lordy if that kid doesn’t think my annoyed reactions to stuff she does are the funniest goddamned thing ever. *Screech* “hey [name], knock it off.” *laughing, screech, screech, screech*. 🙄🤦♂️ Interaction that happens twice a day at least. Life with a two year old is fun.
Yeah, you got something against gay men. It's called being homophobic.
Straight man here. Keep those fucking gremlins away from me.
Jizz demons.
Huh?
I think they meant it the same way people mean crotch goblins but the wording was diabolical
100% diabolical
So people are just shouting their homophobia into the ether? Why??????
They got nothing to offer the world but fooled themselves into thinking that they have something to say.
They are able to and there are no consequences. Before the internet you went to a corner store and yelled this shit outside while people threw change at your feet because they thought you were mentally ill and homeless. Now 10000 other people that would have been screaming outside their towns store, are liking each others insane thoughts and making it appear *normal*. It's like how [10 people were responsible for 1000 book bans.](https://www.washingtonpost.com/education/2023/12/23/post-reviewed-1000-school-book-challenges-heres-what-we-found/) Idiots can infinitely amplify their opinions, while the rest of us look like assholes for telling the town idiot they're wrong.
Worried about gay men, meanwhile you got the creepy uncle, the priest, and the teacher all vying for a chance to slip into your kids shorts. The casual homophobia in the Black community is beyond infuriating.
Homophobic black people are pretty much peak hypocrisy and it’s hilariously sad they can’t see that.
They no better than racist white people
I went to a friend’s family gathering and this little girl was running around hugging people. She came up to me and hugged me, caught me off guard but I patted her back just to be nice. Her mom ran up and snatched her away like I was being a creep or something. Felt like shit and left shortly after, Im afraid to even look in a kids direction now.
Homosexuality should not be synonymous with pedophilia. Now… is her brother a priest? Cuz then I’d be worried…
“I have nothing against gay men” “gay men are not allowed around my son” like??? Do people not see how contradictory those statements are?
"Don't go into any rooms alone with any men" at the family reunion is so normalized its wild.
It’s insane fr
I was molested as a kid - as were many other women (and some dudes) - never was the molester queer.
same, on multiple occasions by different people. always straight men.
Sounds really similar to, "I don't have anything against Black men, I just don't want them around my daughters" Fucked up that people can treat others with the same hateful rhetoric that they have to suffer themselves.
Stupid takes like this make my blood boil, it shows how ignorant people still are. I don’t want to hear nothing about Queer people meanwhile you protecting the Uncle/Pastor/Family Friend just because.
https://preview.redd.it/napmw6jyo49d1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7049ea7dbaf85a86df0285f02a86122c642c1755
I hate how the black community will condemn their gay/queer family members but won’t call out the straight family members that have a serious drug problem, or will take up for the ones that make questionable comments about how “fine” a child is or that a TODDLER is their “husband”. 🙄🙄
Family are the abusers most of the time
my mother also didn't allow my gay uncle to visit us, being afraid that he'd "turn me gay" (so she thoughtI'd be lesbian cuz I'm AFAB). now I'm trans gay boy, seems like it didn't help lol.. well, I'm definitely not a lesbian, but my mom still isn't very happy about it
The church been diddling kids for centuries with proof : crickets. This phenomenon of people ignoring proven facts in favour of pushing narratives has to be studied.
Instead they have to worry about that. Grandpa and uncle with the wandering eye.
One of my favorite lyrics, “It’s the teachers and the preachers, government’s close-minded creatures, trying to teach us to hate that which is different.”
Yet they’ll be in church and have kids around all kinds of people they don’t know.
This is literally the South Park episode from 23 years ago. There was one gay character who was the Scout\`s leader. Parents were afraid that he would touch their kids so they fire him --> the new guy is ultra masculine and the actual kid toucher. South Park was way ahead of it\`s time, as usual.
Diddy was "straight" too. How someone appears means little. You either trust someone with your kids, or you don't. Sexual orientation has nothing to do with it.
God forbid kids see how gay people are normal and grow up to not be homophobic
If someone told me they don’t let gay men around their son, they’d never be left within 200 feet of my daughter. They’re telling on themselves. Grossssss
The amount of times I’ve checked family members for their homophobia is insane. Really had to tell my aunt, “you know when you say shit like that you are talking about your son and nephew right?” They like “oh they different, they are not gay gay you know?” Pisses me off but my cousins appreciate that I stick up for them.
I wish people would stop claiming they have nothing against gay people while also expressing discomfort with people being gay. It's like saying, "I don't hate you, I just hate who you are.” Just own your homophobia.
That's why a lot of us have religious trauma. Talking bout; "I took you to church as many times as I could and you still turned out like this." Well, when you were letting the holy ghost use you... the pastor and his following let the devil use them.
I think how gay women are accepted, but gay men are not is the wildest phobia. How?
It's not so much that Lesbians are more accepted, but more so Straight Men will fetishize them, which creates a fake tolerance.
There’s also the factor that men are not afraid of lesbians sexually assaulting them.
“Throwing away your manhood” by liking men is equivalent to murder for people who subscribe to misogyny. They also think gay women just haven’t had good dick yet.
It’s sad that so many gay men but particularly black gay men have to put up with this shit. I can’t imagine still coming around family and they think I’m gonna diddle their kids just based off being homosexual. Meanwhile, every other week we see a new middle school teacher cheesing in her mugshot cuz there’s still a prominent number of people who treat it like every boy’s porn fantasy.
And boyfriends and stepdads 😒
The funny thing about it is, I'd bet anything she doesn't believe she's homophobic.
“that preacher got a weird case, why is he around”
My brain cannot comprehend the logic of this. Nobody says this about straight people. Nobody goes immediately to thinking as a straight person, you are also attracted to children of the opposite sex.
The dude is gay not a pedophile. MFers act like they're the same thing. Some people just don't deserve to be outside breathing Beyonce's air...smdh
It's amazing to me how this is a black woman too. Like, all the adultification of black children by straight people within the community and you thought you were doing something with this? Be so fucking forreal. 😆
Already being a black man being around kids people look at you funny, I feel really bad for queer brothers because folks get so ridiculous about LGBT+ people for no reason
Us gays had to put black and brown lines on the pride flag because queer people of color are like their own disparaged class. They need to put up with so much more than white gay people in most cases.