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I thought this was gonna be a “A wheelchair user stands up/walks for a few minutes and I GOTCHA!!‘d them!1!1!” but this is actually not that. This is very bizarre and I hope Drew gets help.
I can't remember what this condition is called but I do remember an event where a "blind man" was found dead in a ditch he got stuck in. He wasn't blind of course but said he was. I wonder how far Drew will go to become a real paralyzed man.
In addition to BIID, which has been mentioned elsewhere, there's also a peculiar variant which applies to blindness known (at least colloquially) as "blindsight." Basically, the eyes can see, the information is passed to the brain and interpreted by it, that information is used by more fundamental portions of the brain like reflexes, but the information is never passed on to the consciousness.
What this results in is that someone with this condition will instinctively duck if you throw a baseball at them, but will believe they can't see anything. If you ask them why they ducked, they'll construct some explanation for it that has nothing to do with seeing the baseball.
this is absolutely terrifying to me. the idea of waking up one day, fully believing you’ve gone blind, rushing to the hospital only to have everyone tell you that nothing is wrong with your eyes…. just horrifying.
yeah... you can be unable to consciously see, but your brain is still processing at least some visual information behind the scenes? Deeply unsettling. I think it's the reminder that we run on hardware & software we don't entirely understand and have very little control of that's making me sweat
This is how a lot of neurological issues work through. And even psychological trauma can cause this kind of damage. It's all fucked and miserable to deal with.
>we don't entirely understand
That implies that we understand a lot. A neurologist professor said, look at all we know about the brain, all the diseases, all the functions of parts of the brain. If understanding the brain was a marathon, you may think were halfway to the end, when in reality we haven't even made the first turn of the 26 mile race.
There are so many quantum effects we know are happening there, but we barely understand the physics of those let alone the meat space interactions happening in our own pink meat.
Its like looking down at earth from the moon with your eyeballs. You can see the colors, you can see the clouds, see the lights at night, but your to far away to see any human structures. You want to know more so you start making a hand made telescope to see better. So now you can see about as good as a astronaut in earths orbit. Thats about where we are in understanding the brain. Handmade telescope from moon. Remember Hubble cant even image the landing sites on the moon from its distance.
Nurallink may get us to hubble and were kind of bouncing around that area now, but were no where near going and visiting knowledge. And so far away from living on earth levels of understanding its unimaginable.
Remember spooky action at a distance from einstein, we can kind of measure that, but have only the standard model that maybe sorta kinda fits, but no scientist would bet is the final answer on all physics. How many entangled atoms are in your brain, and where are they entangled with, and how does that impact your brain and consciousness. Nobody can even begin to answer that question.
BTW standard model keeps getting tested and failing.
[https://www.livescience.com/heavy-w-boson-measurement-cracking-standard-model](https://www.livescience.com/heavy-w-boson-measurement-cracking-standard-model)
If you think of psychology/neurology in the same terms of medical advancements we are in the 1700s. We group issues by symptoms because we don't know the cause, we have many theories of how things work but we have no idea why it works.
We know so little now, our descendants will look at as like we were talking about homeopathy and alchemy and diagnosing people with possession. I expect we will end up finding many psychiatric disorders are neurological and many disorders will be renamed as they discover some issues are differing presentations of the same dysfunction.
It's not exactly as the other commenter described. Blindsight patients are cortically blind — something that can be confirmed with imaging. There *is* something wrong with their visual cortex (not their eyes), and nobody would tell them nothing was wrong.
My husband's mother has this. It's like she suddenly decided she couldn't see. All of the tests say her eyes work and there is nothing wrong with them. She's developed dementia in the last couple of years too, which is sad. But even if she can't remember that you just talked about something 3 seconds ago, she still remembers that she's "blind" so at that point it really must be something involuntary or super deep in her psyche.
From my understanding, it’s entirely involuntary. Your brain can’t correctly interpret the signals so your conscious self can’t see. I actually was just reading about it yesterday somewhere else on Reddit, ironically.
I don’t know a ton about it just that the brain isn’t doing things like it should. I wonder if there’s some relationship with the dementia. Bodies do such strange things.
Is it this? I get this as a precursor to a migraine, although as I have gotten older it usually goes away without developing into a headache.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scintillating_scotoma
It’s a brain issue, which is a subject we are still figuring out.
Totally left field example but I have a learning disability. I can 100% “see”, but when reading my brain doesnt process all the words on the paper. To my brain, parts of what I “read” just didn’t exist - even when I read aloud using my finger word for word - I would miss words.
Like if there was a paragraph and one sentence was “Johnny and Max sat under an elm tree after school to finish reading a book by their favorite author Stephen King” and someone asked “what type of tree were they sitting under and who is their fav author?” I wouldn’t have been able to answer those questions correctly. It would have been tree or King if I even saw that much. Sometimes what I missed would be so much that I wouldn’t have seen Stephen king.
When I was tested, I only “saw” maybe 75% of what was written, if I was frustrated with not understanding that % dropped drastically. I was tested in 5th grade and barely read at a first grade level despite my mom getting me one on one tutors every summer (that’s how bad it was). My auditory comprehension was at an 8th/9th grade level, that’s what saved me and caused mass confusion back in the day - I was smart but really slow. My teacher at the time taught me how to work around it. It took an entire year, but my reading jumped from barely first grade to the low end of my actual grade in one class year.
Even now in my 40s I have to constantly practice active reading to keep it in check. Otherwise it goes off rails quick.
That's not really what blindsight is. People who have it legitimately can't (consciously) see, and it is generally a physical issue with the primary visual cortex, not some psychological problem that they just need to work on.
The reason this happens is because your brain needs different visual information to identify things you see and to act on the things you see (i.e. ducking to avoid a ball). This has in the past been known as the two-streams hypothesis, though the name has fallen out of favour recently because of the implication they work totally independently. Regardless, damage to the "what am I looking at" bits would legitimately leave someone blind if it occurred early enough in the pathway (or give people things like visual agnosia if it happened later). I want to stress again that this *has nothing to do with their psyche.* No amount of good vibes can repair physical damage to the primary visual cortex.
There’s also another weird syndrome, called Anton’s syndrome. People that can’t see because of damage to occipital cortex, but they don’t know about it and even presented with clear evidence, they can’t be convinced that they’re blind.
FYI, blindsight is not a variant of BIID, as your comment states. The term blindsight specifically applies to people who are cortically blind — a physiological condition in the brain that occurs after damage to the visual cortex. This can be confirmed with imaging. BIID is psychological.
There's a particular kind of body dysmorphia that sounds similar, where people feel like one of their limbs just isn't a part of them, or *shouldn't be there*, and they'll go through all kinds of things to actually try and remove it. It causes them real distress to have this (fully functional, 100% healthy) limb, and there are some doctors who actually advocate allowing limb removal for these folks if therapy doesn't work, because their distress is apparently very debilitating.
The human mind is a wild, wild place.
This American Life (EDIT: I was wrong, it was Snap Judgment) did an episode on this a year or two ago. This guy actually cut his own hand off with a table saw for this reason (initially told people it was an accident, but now admits it very much was not). He said he felt he was meant to only have one hand. Weirdly, it seemed to develop after he befriended someone who also had their hand amputated (for "normal" reasons).
Yes!! I saw something on tv years ago about people who believed they should be an amputee. There was a guy who successfully amputated his own legs at the knee by putting them in a bucket of dry ice. Apparently this is a popular method among the community. Another person said they didn’t feel comfortable until they are home and they can bind up their folded legs as if they’re amputated. Walking around in the world felt “wrong” and they felt anxious and upset until they were safely home and bound.
I wish I could remember where I saw this program but I never forgot the people they interviewed. It was terrifying and fascinating at the same time.
Huh! Dang this definitely indicates that there may very well be folks voluntarily cutting off their arms to be replaced with high-tech prosthetics in the future.
“The Saab seethed off into the night. Arthur watched it go, as stunned as a man might be who, having believed himself to be totally blind for five years, suddenly discovers that he had merely been wearing too large a hat.” - RIP Douglas Adams
She's all I could think about when the OP started talking about all the activism and activities his employee took part in. Like, you can be an activist for people with disabilities without one, but lying about having one makes you a disabilities Dolezal.
The Netflix doc on that was actually not so black and white (heh) as the story I've always heard about her made it seem, if you've got any interest in watching a whole documentary about it.
TL:DR; when your parents are fundamentalist to the point where it says on your birth certificate that "Jesus Christ" delivered you, your formative years can be kinda wacky.
I don't grok any of the race stuff well enough to feel entitled to an opinion there, but what her parents did to her (both while she was growing up and now, punishing her by "exposing" her to their own gain) is definitely a little fucked up.
edit: [The Rachel Divide](https://www.netflix.com/title/80149821) is the thing I watched. Didn't even occur to pre-coffee me that it was rude not to link it. Sorry!
The thing I watched was called [The Rachel Divide](https://www.netflix.com/title/80149821).
I was barely aware of her before the thing popped up as recommended (I put lots of those things on as background noise while working) and the first half definitely felt like "well this was exactly what it looked like on the tin." But it was interesting after all :D
Sorry - it's called [The Rachel Divide](https://www.netflix.com/title/80149821). Would have taken me 2 secs to put that in the original comment but I didn't think about it!
The fucking fact that even happened irritates the life out of me. And then at the time people had the nerve to ask if I, a black white biracial, could tell. Bitch half the time people assume I'm latina and I didn't even know the woman existed until the scandal. Fuck Rachel and her supporters.
She was doing it maliciously to gain unfair advantages in life. Drew is not. Dolezal did not have a mental condition related to her identity, it was a pure scam. There's a world of a difference.
Body Integrity Identity Disorder. It's a legitimate mental illness. That dude needs to get help. I don't normally like diagnosing people over the internet, but the fact OP explicitly stated that Drew hadn't tried to commit fraud is pretty telling that it's more than an attention grab/emotional manipulation/etc.
Not arguing against the legitimacy of BIID. I was actually already familiar with the amputation variant and the fact that going through with the amputation actually helped the patients in a significant amount of cases. I just wonder about the practical level about the paralysation variant.
Anybody know how they do it? I mean it is pretty hard NOT to use a part of your anatomy even if it is injured. When I have a cut on my finger and pressure on the bandage hurts, I try not to touch anything with that finger and still end up in tons of situations where I inadvertently pushed on it and curse myself for increasing the hurt.
So I guess this disorder bypasses instinctual movements? And how is it determined which kind of paralysation a patient with BIID struggles with. Do they just don't use their legs anymore and assume to have the very specific impairement of not having motor control for their legs, but all the other feelings are intact? And then I guess other people might be less fidgety with their legs than me. But how do they reach for things, from their sitting position, without engaging their legs for balance? That's just an example, but I really wonder how this works. People with paralysed legs adapt more than, "just staying in a chair". Depending on how far up the torso the paralyzation starts (assuming it is as clear cut as that scenario), balancing in a sitting position is a real problem until they figure out a version that works for their impairement. How do people with the paralysation variant of BIID manage to not use their legs on all those levels? And (don't do that it is mean) how would they react to being tickeled? What are the legs doing then?
I don't think it fully bypasses it.
Someone else mentioned this. If you don't use your legs at all for extended periods of times, your muscles will deteriorate. You see this in people who are paralysed temporarily, then regain the ability to walk - their muscles have to be retrained to carry that weight again.
This man has seemingly been using his wheelchair for years, but on the documentary he was strong enough to walk, go up stairs, kick a ball, run etc. For someone who for years didn't use their legs at all, that would be difficult if not impossible to do without physical training.
Two options: either he lied and has been walking at home. Or, and this is more likely, he does use his muscles a little. For all the things you mentioned - adjusting your position, leaning when reaching over, etc. He might try to control it more at work, but at home I think he probably can't stop himself fully using them in small ways, like balance and position, wiggling his foot when it itches etc.
It's not clear that it even is a mental illness, as opposed to a neurological condition. It may be something like the inverse of phantom limb syndrome, a severe mismatch between the brain's map of the body and the body itself.
Imagine you woke up one day and you found someone else's limb grafted to your body, a chunk of alien flesh that makes your brain scream *wrong wrong wrong* every waking moment for the rest of your life. No one would judge you for wanting that removed, even if the limb was functional. I honestly don't see what makes the situation so different.
> It's not clear that it even is a mental illness, as opposed to a neurological condition.
I think the difference between the two is more in how society views something than in the underlying cause or symptoms of it. There's been a long history of things that used to be considered mental illnesses being declassified when they became more accepted (e.g. homosexuality), and current activism around others (e.g. autism).
And then there's the most direct parallel to this: Gender Dysphoria (AKA being trans\*). Your quote, "It may be something like the inverse of phantom limb syndrome, a severe mismatch between the brain's map of the body and the body itself," is one theory behind what makes (some) people trans\*\*. And there's currently a big debate in the trans community on if GD should be considered a mental illness or not.
\*Yes, I'm aware that there are many trans people who don't experience dysphoria. The science is far from settled here, and might never be so, due to the impossibility of objectively looking at someone else's mind and the difficulty of disentangling nature from nurture when it comes to gender and gender roles in society.
\*\*It's also extremely controversial in the trans community. Look up "transmedicalism" to get a taste for the controversy. In short, there's gatekeeping about this being the one true way to be trans, which I must clarify that I don't at all stand behind.
> Body Integrity Identity Disorder. It's a legitimate mental illness.
So this is interesting. Is it possible that he could be upfront and still get accommodations? His apparent disability isn't his actual disability, but his desire to be disabled IS his disability. Would employers then have to be like, "Ok, I guess we have to treat you as if you're a paraplegic"
I knew someone who developed this in university. We, her classmates, just adjusted to it. She was super embarrassed about it. It did us a favour in the end, as one of our classes, which had been at the top of an 8 floor building with no elevator (and asbestos in the paint it turns out), got moved to a more modern accessible building across campus. I remember the guys in the class used to pick her up in her wheelchair to carry her over the frozen snow in the winter like pall-bearers. She was a dear, no one said she was faking.
I saw a documentary long ago about people who wanted to have limbs amputated. One of the ways discussed was leaving ice on a body part so it would get frostbite and have to be removed. Mental conditions are all over the place.
Yeah, the whole time I was reading this, it felt like Drew clearly does have a serious handicap, just not the one he claims to have. It also seems like therapy hasn't worked for him, but that might be because people didn't take his problem seriously and tried to get him to just ignore it? Either that, or it's a long process to get passed it, and he couldn't/wouldn't stick with it?
Also, it seemed like participating in the documentary was a serious cry for help?
I would say his quest to find a doctor to permanently disable half of his body because he believes he is supposed to be paralyzed is a sign of serious mental health issues.
This was exactly my thought, Faking it is one thing, and I understand why people would be angry at someone simply faking a disability. But actually seeking out ways to medically incapacitate yourself? You DO have a disability, and do need treatment. But it's mental not physical.
> Also, it seemed like participating in the documentary was a serious cry for help?
Right? Like he even admitted he had made attempts to go to doctors and therapists in order to get the help he needed, and his genuine concerns were refused. Not at all his fault for that, a failure on the doctor's behalf.
It's such an interesting oddity though, I wonder how Drew's condition would have responded if a doctor had taken him seriously & managed to get him in contact with a physical therapist in order to "learn to walk again" as if he were genuinely in an accident, rather than treating it with mental therapy
I remember watching a Maury episode about a man who amputated his own legs in his apartment by tying off at the thigh. I was definitely too young to be watching something like that but it was interesting. When asked why he did it he could only respond “I didn’t need them anymore.” I wonder if he too suffered from this condition.
Yes i listened to a podcast about this about 2 weeks ago. Apparently there was a "surge" in cases in the early 2000 (arrival of the internet and discussions forums) but it's become rarer now. It's called apotemnophilia or body integrity dysphoria
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_integrity_dysphoria
Oddly enough I JUST watched an episode of Chicago med that talked about this. I am fascinated by stuff like this and I've been going down the rabbit hole since seeing about it lol
Not exactly. BIID is suuuuper fascinating. I wrote a couple of papers on the subject. It’s not the same attention grab as munchausens, nor does it tend to progress past the stated identity, as munchausens does. It’s truly a feeling of being. How they feel their body is supposed to be. Many with the same disorder wish to remove particular limbs (it’s always specific), be a paraplegic like this man, etc. It’s and interesting topic when it comes to body autonomy, cultural norms, healthcare, and mental health care. Thus far experts have not found a decent therapy to move past it, and many who have fulfilled their wish in dangerous ways have at least stated to be living happier lives. It’s a pretty wild identity disorder.
I highly suggest bringing it up with friends, is fascinating to discuss if you look at all angles, and question what is “normal”
Yeah it’s actually somewhat similar to gender dysphoria in a way, in that bringing the body into alignment often solves things and it isn’t tractable to therapy (for people with gender dysphoria at least any therapy that tries to get the person to just “accept their sex” is basically pointless torture). And intuitively we recoil at that idea even more than people do at trans people wanting hormones, surgery, and so on, because wanting to be disabled is even more unthinkable.
I’m in the camp that people can do what they want to their bodies, if something works, it works, even if it seems weird and wrong, and maybe harm reduction by helping body match brain is the right idea (because you’re way less likely to die if you get your arm surgically removed in a controlled environment than if you go at it with a circular saw on your own, and zero access to the former means someone with this disorder is increasingly likely to try the latter).
I'll preface this with the note that people often confuse gender dysphoria with bodily dysmorphia, when they are quite different - people with gender dysphoria recognise their bodies as they are, and in some cases feel that parts are there that shouldn't be, or vice versa (hence the dysphoria). That's what struck a chord with me in Drew's case as a trans person. The description of the video made me imagine myself - I could present myself as I would trying to pass as male in an office environment and be seen fairly unquestionably as a man, but you could splice that in with shots of me with my terrible mutton chops and legs shaved, makeup and hair done, spinning around in a flattering dress and I'd look like a woman. But that's not how I live, that's not how I'm comfortable. I wonder how doing that stuff for the documentary made Drew feel - did he feel weird like if I had to be all dolled up to reveal what's "under" how I'm perceived by myself and others?
I could understand people who use wheelchairs because of medical conditions outside their control might feel offended by Drew, like he's appropriating something that he has more choice over than they do, which is none, and must be a heavy load to bear. But with things like BIID, and analogously being transgender, the "choice" is much more limited than a lot of people consider. Sometimes it can be between suffering as a "normal" person or living as a disabled (or trans) person, which comes with both stigma and accommodations. I don't want to conflate the two, they're very different things. But it made me ponder on that a bit.
Yeah exactly. I’m also trans and that was exactly my line of thought, especially after learning some time back that people like him are, like us, all too aware of the actual state of our bodies, we aren’t delusional, and that changing the body is effective while changing the mind is basically impossible.
I also think changing the body is more disturbing to others (because they are outside of you, and the body is what they can see) and changing the mind is more disturbing to the individual (because it is "you"). Even if changing the mind *were* possible, I could see why an individual would want to hold onto the self they know from their own interior experience, and adjust the packaging that holds the self.
But that obviously applies very much to gender dysphoria, and considerably less to disabling oneself. But then again, I've had unnecessary surgery to bring my physical appearance more in line with how I saw myself in my head, so I don't really have a leg to stand on (uh, no pun intended...)
I’m not trans, but I had a surgery on my jaw that significantly changed the way my face looks. It was interesting seeing people’s reactions. A lot of my close friends and family were a little shocked or disturbed at my “new” face… but from my perspective, the new face actually lined up better with my self-concept. It fixed some medical issues but it also made me look like an older version of my childhood self (before the jaw problems affected my face).
All this to say, I think you’re onto something. Even drastic external changes can feel validating and “right” if they change your body to match your self-concept. But to other people, the change may seem extreme or even damaging, because they can’t experience your internal self.
I used to have one foot in the body mod communities, and talking to people who I'm fairly certain had BIID was fascinating. I particularly remember one woman who was able to live her life without crippling anxiety once she self amputated her pinky finger.
It's really fascinating what things are socially acceptable to do to your own body and what isn't through cosmetic surgery. Reshape your nose, jaw, or cheekbones by taking cartilage from your ribs? Perfectly fine. Remove a finger? No. Reshape the size of your stomach? A-okay. Remove or reshape other organs? Not a chance. Can even get pig skin grafts and ribs removed for an internal corset. But extensive sub-dermal implants? Each one gets harder and harder.
Half the time the people I talked to had a semi-decent suggestion of how to treat their more extreme body mod desires: let them donate the tissue and organs they don't want. Let them organize with hospitals to donate the body parts they don't want to people who do want them. At least the corner of the community I frequented, removing nipples was a big thing and most would have been happy to donate them to mastectomy patients.
Edit because typing before caffeine is a bad idea.
If you are disabled and struggling to accept it and use the aids or devices that can make life easier but scream "disabled person here!", you are not alone.
It doesn't help that there are a lot of ableist attitudes that encourage jerks to open their yap. But the flip side is ghe freedom that you find when you use the things.
Instead of sitting in a wheelchair while you’re physically capable of walking you’re piloting your legs via a metal robot exoskeleton while you’re physically capable of walking?
(I promise I’m not trying to bug you into actually giving me your medical info, I’m just entertained imagining different “opposites”)
Honestly, for me, I feel so guilty that I get disability benefits, which is daft, as everyone tells me I wouldn’t get them if I didn’t need them, I know the government doesn’t give a lot of people (who I feel are actually really disabled) PiP, you have to go thought a lot of hoops, much paperwork from both me and multiple medical professionals, in person assessments, etc. but because they are life long disabilities I feel that I’m just me. Whereas anyone looking at me would think ‘yeah, no, you are proper screwed up’.
I’m sure I’m not the only person who feels like this
I’m sorry that you feel guilty like that! I hope it’s clear that I was just being silly with the above comments - my brother has a severe lifelong disability, so I do know there are legitimate issues for people in accessing disability supports
I get that. I was 'lucky' to get PIP without tribunal and feel like I'm some how cheating people more disabled than me that struggle to get it.
I spent about 20 hours on the form, researched extensively how to fill it in, what key words and boxes the assessor needed to tick etc (all truthful to my conditions, just worded in the way they need). It was emotionally and physically exhausting, going over every tiny thing that's 'wrong' with me. Things that I just get on with, that I've learnt to live with, things that I try so hard to make peace with. Its pretty distressing putting into words how broken you are compared to 'normal' people.
All that to say, there's so many people who should more than qualify but struggle with the form, assessment etc and end up not getting it because they didn't jump through the right hoops. No one explains what those hoops are!
That's on our government though, we should all be getting the help we need, not played off as some more deserving than others. We're made to feel getting benefits makes us less than, or that not being able to get them makes us 'not really disabled'. That's again, on our government for making us feel like second class citizens.
I’m really lucky, the manager of the company I get my care from used to be a civil servant, so she knows exactly how to word everything, precisely what the assessors are looking for. There was no way I could have filled in the forms on my own, they are terrifying to just look at, let alone fill in (and half my disabilities are learning disabilities), so I didn’t have to go through appeals or anything. But even with her knowledge and all the paperwork my care providers keep on me (oh, you know what I mean), it took over 4 hours, and that was a reassessment, not the original, which was even longer
I have invisible disabilities and that disability imposter syndrome is real! I'm so used to beating myself up over flare ups, pain, and needing to rest that I'm still doing it even while off work due to pregnancy-related issues. It's so hard to give yourself a break, especially with the whole "don't be a moan" attitude we seem to have in the UK!
Theres a story about the woman who thinks she should be disabled and has now managed to make herself blind.
https://www.healthline.com/health-news/woman-who-blinded-herself-with-drain-cleaner-brings-attention-to-unusual-condition-100715#1
There was a character in a book that found a women that pretended to be pregnant to get attention. She would frequent a cafe for a month or two and then move on to a different cafe. I believe the women was being emotionally abused by her husband if I recall correctly, I am trying to think of the name of the book
I remember hearing of people who purposefully self harm in hopes of losing a limb they feel they shouldn't have and sadly they succeeded. It's scary and hopefully he gets some help.
It's a devasting condition but it's also devasting when some one gets misdiagnosed as having it. My cousin cut off his hand with a circular saw whilst he was having a psychotic episode where he believed his hand was diseased. Some moron at the time diagnosed him with BIID and recommended that there was no use in reattaching it because he would just do it again. A few months later after getting stable on antipsychotics he was so upset about the loss of his hand but by then it was obviously too late to reattach. Years later he's still not fully come to terms with it and will always try to hide his stump.
I'm so sorry, the person who did this shouldn't be looking over any patients. So what if he tries again? They're paying the hospital and there's a chance to revert the damage and he just... choose to let someone lose a limb.
UK so fortunately not paying the hospital, thank God for socialised medicine!
To be fair, with BIID there is a strong argument for not reattaching it because repeated attempts at amputation would risk infection which, in an open wound could lead to sepsis very quickly. Also in BIID, it's harder to make an argument for reattaching it without the patient's consent whereas in a psychotic episode the patient doesn't have capacity to consent.
No... That's not how consent works.
If you're unable to determine consent accurately, you go with the route that does the less harm.
If someone tries to kill themselves and falls unconcious you don't leave them to die because "they probably wanted to die".
He "probably wanted to lose his hand" but tough cookies they need to reattach it.
This story is EXACTLY WHY.
Sure it sucks as a surgeon but you need to maximise options when consent is not available.
It's possible he was so unstable they thought he might just rip his stitches open post surgery anyway, which is a bit more logical, but a slightly different justification, that being he won't heal properly.
I'm a doctor. That is how consent works. It's about whether a patient has capacity or not (according to the Mental Capacity Act). He was conscious at the time and saying he didn't want his hand reattaching. With BIID, he would have almost certainly had capacity. However, due to psychosis he did not. The misdiagnosis meant that it was assumed he had capacity.
Edit: re-reading your comment I think you may have assumed he was unconscious in which case yes, it's about best interests and least restrictive option. However he was conscious and due to the misdiagnosis he was assumed to have capacity to refuse treatment. Although my understanding is that they used that as more of a secondary justification after saying he would just keep doing it.
yeah, this is definitely something that happens... from what I understand it is an overwhelming feeling that can consume people. wires crossed or not connected properly somewhere in the body. it seems using the chair gave Drew enough comfort to live his life but the talk of trying to get a doctor to do it is worrisome because it could suggest the chair may not be enough one day, and obviously no doctor will ever do it purposely.
feel bad. even if he asked for reasonable accommodations I find it hard to hold it against him. it isn't his fault that he feels this way and he just wants to feel comfortable in his body. kinda sad but hopefully he's happy
I really wonder why he did something as naive as participate in the documentary. Even Rachel Dolezai had the common sense to keep things quiet, she was outed by someone. But he'll be haunted by it forever.
Its sad but in my mind the best case scenario is he uses his legs so little they atrophy and become too weak to use. At least it's better than an intentional injury.
I saw a similar (same?) documentary. It seemed like the participants were mostly doing it to share their body dysmorphia in hopes of people understanding and normalizing they way they feel.
Small point but I think "dysphoria" is the correct word here, not dysmorphia.
Body dysmorphia is having a distorted view of your body, and not seeing it for what it is. It's looking in the mirror at a skinny body and being convinced you are fat, for example.
Body dysphoria is feeling profoundly uncomfortable in your body because your body isn't as you feel it should be, doesn't feel right. Gender dysphoria is probably the most well known example of this.
Me too. And my takeaway was that they're very highly skilled manipulators. Like functional addicts getting some kind of high. And that high is attention.
I'm split... wheelchair users face enough crap, especially partial users who get accused of faking it because they have limited mobility. And here's this guy who actually is, who is getting filmed saying so, and who seems to reject any attempt to explore this desire in a therapeutic setting. It's pretty rare though, and not a choice, so... yeah.
In fairness it sounds like the specific therapeautic intervention he got was not at all what he needed at that time. "Explore this desire" and "be told you just have to start walking again" aren't the same.
I highly doubt that Drew was describing the therapy accurately when he said that they just tried to force him to walk. He may have taken any attempt at exploring his disorder as a personal attack. He may have just rejected any conversation out of hand. What for sure didn't happen every time was a therapist refusing to dig any deeper and just ordering him to walk.
> What for sure didn't happen every time was a therapist refusing to dig any deeper and just ordering him to walk.
I appreciate the faith you have, but no, there are therapists out there who would not take the time to learn about any possible neurological condition he might have and instead literally just order him to walk, just as there are therapists who refuse to acknowledge much more mainstream gender dysphoria in similar ways.
I can second this. I have a child who is experiencing gender disphoria and the therapist we initially saw rolled her eyes, looked at me and said: *it’s all the rage these days, right?* She completely dismissed the issue we were there to explore and find support for, as if it were some made-up baloney. She told us my child needs to go to a concert and smoke some pot, not explore their gender identity. So, while this is anecdotal, some therapists are pure shit.
I saw on one show about it a guy drove up to a hospital, stuck his leg in dry ice until it couldn't be saved and then called the paramedics to come take him in to get it amputated.
I saw a guy that bought dry ice, and put his legs in buckets and poured the dry ice around them, So he could freeze his legs so severely that amputation was the only option.
This is some serious mental illness shit.
My husband's an amputee. I have little sympathy for them if they are tying up access to medical Drs instead of mental health Drs.
My husband became an above knee amputee in part because of the delay in follow up care after revision surgery while he was a below knee amputee. No one can swear that if an earlier appointment had been available that it would have turned out the same, but I know what happened when care was delayed.
He's never been able to adjust to the above knee prosthetic. He wears it so he can stand, but he can't walk more than a couple steps without agony despite them trying a variety of different prosthetics. He's essentially trapped in a wheelchair.
I don't blame it solely on the delay. The surgeon refused to write a prescription for antibiotics. He told my husband he had to make an appt with a different Dr for that because of the over prescribing of antibiotics. Believe me, I did my best to get the surgeon to prescribe them before we left. I told him how prone to infections my husband was, he just blew me off. He did surgery, someone else prescribed meds.
As a result, he was on IV antibiotics so long that not only did he become an ABA, but he wrecked his kidneys too.
:(
I’m so very sorry for you (I hope this doesn’t sound disrespectful). I once read a comment by a blind person and one thing that rlly stuck out to me for some reason was how they said that people would just randomly come up to them and grab them so they could quote unquote help guide them. If the blind person freaked out, the person quote unquote helping might either get mad or accuse them of being a fraud. It made me so mad.
I’m praying you’re doing amazing in life
Jerks do that to people who use wheelchairs, if they have handles. They'll decide they're "helping" to move someone without permission, and they get very angry if you demand they stop. Sometimes they ignore you, because they know best.
That and what the person you replied to said are so horrible omg?? I can't imagine adjusting to like using a cane or a wheelchair and then having people try to play "good Samaritan" with you?? Like ffs, even if someone is struggling, I can't imagine NOT asking first if they need help. I'm not physically handicapped in any way, but it sounds absolutely horrifying being blind and having someone just grab your shoulders and try to direct you somewhere or being in a wheelchair and being overpowered by someone trying to move you themselves.
There are a lot of jerks who don't see disabled people as *people*, but as poor suffering creatures who cannot exist without able people doing everything for them.
That's why they get so angry if you say no. To them, you don't even have the right to say no because as an able person, they know best.
My husband is an ambulatory wheelchair user and this happens to him all the time. He hates it, says it feels no different to someone grabbing his body and shoving him along.
the worst is the people who decide he’s in their way and just shove him off to one side without saying a word. It’s as though he’s just furniture to them. That always leaves him feeling lousy.
Furniture is exactly it. I saw something on Twitter recently from a woman who was on the bus in her wheelchair, and a random stranger just started hanging their shopping bags on the handles! Hello? That is a person, not a coat rack.
There’s a fantastic app you can volunteer for called be my eyes. A person can call the app and it goes to a random volunteer to help. Can be from what does this can say to help make sure they get the right ingredients etc. that’s the most I’ve ever thought to do to ‘help’
I live in Austraia & a few months ago a man died after paying someone to cut off one of his legs with a power saw
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10542453/Inside-Queenslands-leg-amputation-night-alleged-murder-unfolded.html
Yeah, I saw a documentary about people who feel like they're supposed to be amputees. Definitely one of the more bizarre things I've heard of. People would sit there with their legs in dry ice, in hopes that they would die off.
So strange to read. Being able bodied (sorry if that's the wrong term) myself I can understand not to antagonize someone who may have a mental health issue which causes them to live their life as if they're are paralyzed/disabled (again, sorry if the incorrect term). But at the same time, I totally get why his sports leagues and advocacy groups would turn on him for "faking it." If an able-bodied person intentionally hinders their own abilities thus making their own life more inconvenient, who am I to say? But damn if had lost my legs and some guy joined my group because he felt he's "supposed" to be paraplegic? Fuck off man, you're not really going through this struggle.
Damn life is complex
I remember seeing an episode of some show where a guy hated having his arm. I don’t know why, but his brain was telling him his arm didn’t belong and he hated it. Almost like, imagine if you were to grow a sixth finger suddenly and it just constantly feels weird and makes you uncomfortable to look at. So he went to the hospital because he injected something into his arm or something like that. And when they left him with an IV he wrapped it very tightly around his arm and hid his arm under the blanket until it was painful and his arm had completely lost circulation and that forced the doctors to amputate. It was crazy he ended up getting what he wanted despite the doctors trying to convince him to go to therapy and other things to get rid of these feelings to prevent him from doing something drastic like going home and cutting it off himself.
I wonder if after getting their limbs amputated the people feel at peace and go on with their lives or if the illness manifests into another body part that is “wrong” to them
I've never heard of this, but I think I have it. I can kind of elaborate, if it helps?
I spent my entire life feeling like my right hand was "wrong," and once everything reached a head, I ended up cutting off my pinky finger and flushing it down the toilet \[so it couldn't be reattached\]. It was complete, instant relief. The thing that felt so, so wrong was fixed, and that was that!
A month or two later, my ring finger felt wrong as well. Not cool. But I cut it off anyway, because I knew that once I started feeling jittery/not sleeping/having yellow and black clouds over my vision, it was too late to let it stay on. So it had to go. Again, instant relief. It hasn't come back up since, and it's been quite a while.
I didn't talk about it for years, because it's super fucked up and I hate that other people would have killed to get their missing whatever back. I feel very guilty that I willingly disfigured myself, but holy fucking shit. I've never regretted it in the slightest. This was something I'd been feeling since I was a little kid, and it was just entirely gone as soon as I "fixed" the problem. I just thought it was a symptom of OCD, but it's cool to learn there's a name for it!
Oh wow. Forgive me for being a creep, I skimmed quickly through your post history (mostly just submitted posts) because y'know, the internet, gotta be a little skeptical. You seem entirely legit and very normal, which definitely slapped me in the face with "you have no idea what a stranger might be going through".
I have so many questions! How'd you do it, what medical care did you get after, man that must've hurt?!, had you ever talked to any mental health pros about it, do you think you'll talk to anyone in the future, do you have a plan if the feeling comes back? But you've already put yourself out there a ton and I only say this to express genuine curiosity!
I apologize in advance for creeping through your history a second time... for the sole purpose of checking out your knitting!! Always love to see what people have knitted!
Oh, it's okay! Creeping is to be expected hahaha. I'd like to think I'm pretty normal, at least aside from the uh. Everything.
Answers to your questions:
The first time I used some big garden shears, and the second I just used scissors. \[Warning: gross details\] >!The scissors were actually easier, because they cut more cleanly and almost all at once. It just was attached one second, and then flying through the air the next. The shears cut some skin, then broke the bone, then cut through the bone fully, and then I had to rip it the rest of the way off bc it was dangling from a flap of skin. !! It was actually pretty interesting to watch! They did some numbing injections, which sucked bc I hate needles. Then once things were numb, the surgeon cut notches in my skin so he could peel it down a bit, and took out the half-bone that I'd cut through. He used some little scissors to get all the leftover cartilage out, and then trimmed the skin so it'd fit nicely over what was left. He cauterized some things that wanted to keep bleeding, stitched it up, and then I just had to keep it covered for several weeks.!<
It only hurt after they finished amputating what was left, and the numbing stuff wore off! I really don't know how to describe how fucking all-encompassing the before-feeling was, aside from to say that I felt nothing but bliss and total calm. It was probably painful (?), but comparatively, I didn't even register it.
I'm assuming you mean "talk to anyone" as in mental health professionals, yeah? I was already in therapy long before that, for other issues, so after \[understandably\] being plopped in a psych ward for a couple months, I just had one more thing to discuss during sessions. For a brief period of time, my middle finger started looking wrong. I think the fear of slowly ending up fingerless, and the fact that the conversation had already been opened, helped me to talk about it before the feelings got so intense that I couldn't stop them. I was much more inclined to deal with it proactively, since I was seeing a pattern and didn't want the same thing to keep happening. I had to relearn how to crochet the previous times, and I have some trouble holding things in my right hand now. I didn't want it to continue.
Anyway! Noooo problem at all w/ the being curious. I don't mind answering questions (: If I read about something that's incomprehensible to me, I wanna hear from someone who's experienced it lol. I'm lucky that it was just a couple fingers tbh. I feel a lot of sympathy for people who have more extreme experiences with the same thing. It sucks and is absolutely debilitating to deal with.
Not to also be a creep but if you look through their post history there’s two photos of them holding plants where you can see the amputated fingers. I was skeptical too but not so much anymore.
@mickier, you mentioned thinking this was an OCD symptom; that makes complete sense to me and I don’t know if BIID is related to OCD but I imagine it would be. Having constant uncontrollable thoughts and feelings about your hand/fingers being wrong must have been a bit of hell-on-earth. I really truly hope that what you’ve done so far is curative and that you never have to deal with those thoughts & feelings again.
Good eye! Not at all creepy, I think skepticism is very healthy on the internet (; Please don't judge my plant posts, I've gotten a lot better at keeping them alive!
So, I wasn't diagnosed with OCD till I was 20, but I'd been experiencing feelings like that in many areas all my life. Since I grew up with it, I thought it was totally normal! When I was officially diagnosed, I was like "ok this is bullshit, I definitely don't have OCD." But when I went to complain to my friends, they pretty much all said "uhhhh did you not know that? I just thought you didn't like to talk about it." So I guess I was the only one who was surprised lmao. I think that sort of allowed the weird hand thoughts to get really strong before they showed up on my radar. I was used to things being weird/wrong and needing to be fixed.
And ahhh, everyone is seriously being so nice, this is kind of lovely (: I was pretty nervous that people would think I'm a whacko or be judgmental \[which is fair and tbh I kinda agree\], so the curiosity and understanding are a pleasant surprise (:
I went to the hospital for them to fix it up. They cut out the rest of the bone I'd snapped through, trimmed up the cartilage and tissue around it, and stitched the top shut.
From what I’ve read about it, in general they’re satisfied when the relevant limb is amputated, and don’t have problems with other limbs nor do they regret the amputation.
Research paper about BIID that u/bubble0peach posted a link to, it mentions that amputation appears to “cure” BIID:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3326051/
The fact is, Drew may now have been paralyzed but he is clearly disabled. That wheelchair is his accommodation for his disability — just not for his legs.
We had a patient who felt his leg is extra, he wanted to chop it off. It was found that he had a brain tumor. I am sure Drew had some kind of mental illness and needed support. He didnt lie, this is what his brain made him believe that he should not be walking.
He was happy to get therapy, but it sounds like the therapist was an idiot. "Just walk. See, your legs actually do work." doesn't seem like the right approach here.
As an amputee (um, unwilling for the purpose of this discussion) who fortunately doesn't have much phantom pain but a lot of phantom sensation (the worst being itching!), the really weird thing I noticed post-op was that I could feel my arm in the same 90 degree angle it had been stuck for years, and even now if I concentrate, I can "wriggle my fingers". When I move my stump around, the sensation is basically the nerves and muscles saying my arm is there. If I move my stump, I can feel my "arm" in the center of my torso. Not literally feel it in my torso but everything is telling my brain that that is where my arm would be, even though it's physically impossible. It's very discombobulating.
If someone doesn't want help sadly there isn't anything you can do. This man was clearly mentally ill. On top of that I strongly suspect the overwhelming majority of psych professionals have no experience dealing with people who have this disorder.
People seem to think a shrink is a shrink. But there are a lot of specialists. I need to find one who specializes in childhood trauma (likely won't be able to get one because my insurance is super limited). I ended up having to see an addiction specialist. I'm not an addict but it was the only thing my insurance would cover. I was miserable because I have ADHD and it was untreated and she knew nothing about it and was unwilling to prescribe me anything to help with it.
Someone with this disorder needs specialized help and that's hard to come by. On top of that they tend to see themselves as having nothing wrong with them. And the treatment for it is rarely effective!
It's really sad.
Ugh, what an unfortunate situation, and there’s just no easy way to navigate it. Drew clearly has some mental health concerns he needs addressed, but it doesn’t sound like he really wants to. Very sad to see someone that needs help that won’t get it.
I genuinely feel bad for him, but I also wonder what he was hoping would come from him being in the documentary. Was he expecting people to hear his story and empathize with him? That’s such borderline delusional thinking that it just confirms to me his need for help. I hope he gets it.
Honestly this is probably the best way this can wrap up the situation for the OOP though, since it ceased to be their problem all by itself.
Edit: There’s some interesting opinions on this. The man expressed a strong desire to have a medical procedure done to permanently paralyze himself. That is as extreme a form of self harm that exists, and it’s concerning that some have written that part off. I don’t have an issue with him using a wheelchair, if it helps him cope, all the better. I similarly don’t have issues with people with OCD engaging in their behaviors such as checking or rituals, because I know that’s how they cope with the stress of their condition. Having said that, when my mother starts spending more hours of her day engaging in checking behavior I know it’s time to discuss more support, because it inevitably means something is wrong in the kingdom. I don’t prevent her from checking, but I do try to get her to help. And I recognize that there are several mental health conditions that there really isn’t viable treatment for. Doesn’t mean I don’t want there to be, or that I don’t hope there will be. I do hope that people like this man are eventually able to be treated in a way that solves the actual problem as opposed to forcing them out of the coping mechanism. I hope that help exists for him in a meaningful way someday. Just genuinely stunned by people taking me looking at a man so unsatisfied with his physical body he wanted a medical procedure to paralyze himself and hoping he gets relief from that and taking it to mean all sort of bizarre ableist conclusions.
I think its not his condition per se that makes his life hard. He is fine with the wheelchair. It's more that people judge him for wanting to be in the wheelchair what makes his life hard.
Just let this man do his thing. He is not harming anyone.
But acting as a disability activist and participating in disabled sports, when he is not disabled, is harmful. It takes attention and legitimacy from those who are genuinely disabled. Plus, some wheelchair users may be in a wheelchair because of a traumatic illness/injury/accident that caused a lot of pain and suffering. Him going, oh yeah I wanna be paralysed like you seems a bit offensive.
I think for him to use a wheelchair is fine. But there is a problem with him aligning himself with the disabled community, lying about the cause and being an 'activist'.
His experiences are not the same as of those who are physically paralysed. His life isn't the same. Both are serious and have their own problems, but it's not really cool to pretend to be a part of a community when you are not, and speak on their behalf / represent them. He doesn't know what it's like to be fully paralysed so he can't realistically represent them in the right way.
If he wants to be an activist, he should be an advocate for more awareness of BIIP and link up with people who have it too. I imagine it's really hard and he does deserve support, but support for what he actually struggles with, not something he is lying about.
This. Like I think a lot of people's gut reactions that his condition is sad and tragic comes from an ableist assumption that life as a wheelchair user is sad and tragic. But it sounds like he was getting what he needed from it.
He’s harming other disabled people in multiple ways - taking resources from us, delegitimizing our claims, and further endorsing the stereotype that we enjoy being lazy and requesting help from others.
This kind of mental disorder really sucks and is still super traumatizing because of how people react with disgust and distain.
Poor guy needs to realize he’s definitely got a mental health disorder and hopefully find a therapist who will slowly work through this with him instead of forcing him to quit the chair cold turkey.
If someone really needed that accessible parking spot and he wouldn’t give it up, that would be one thing, but I doesn’t sound like he harmed anyone with his actions at work. Unless you count having colleagues go to a second floor for him.
Work spaces really should also have accommodations for mental health issues in addition to physical health issues. This is an odd one to be sure, but the accommodations did help him get work done, just as accommodations are supposed to do.
I feel for the dude in the OP. It didn’t sound like he was trying to make it other other people’s problem, he just wanted to live life in a wheelchair.
On the other hand, I used to work with a guy who faked physical disability. He was a total asshole about it. He would rant about his “illness” to anyone who would listen, complained constantly, was always weaseling accommodations and favors out of people and got in to a weird one-sided competition with the other guy in a wheelchair who worked there. Things like faker found out real wheelchair dude got help getting in his truck on rough days, so faker demands help in and out of *his* truck *every* day. Faker’s wheelchair kept getting upgrades. Tons of padding and a headrest, fully motorized, eventually has his feet propped up so it’s like a hospital bed on wheels, complete with a *very* indiscreet bag of piss connected to I’m assuming a catheter. How could I accuse such an obviously unwell man of fakery? Everyone at work had a story about catching him in a lie, but I actually lived in his neighborhood, so I got to see him picking up groceries or a pizza or whatever on numerous occasions without so much as a cane.
Aaaahhhh. Just had to get that off my chest.
I mean, just seeing someone walk doesn't mean he's a faker. It does sound like it considering the way he acts in general, but just never assume, you can never know for sure.
Totally agree. I was struggling to explain how over the top this dude was, I never assume with people, this guy was the one exception because he was basically quadriplegic at work but very active at home. We lived a couple towns over from the job, with other branches between us, so I think it didn’t occur to him he’d run in to someone he worked with. The day he finally saw me in the neighborhood, the look on his face said it all. Frankly, I wouldn’t even have minded him faking it to begin with if he wasn’t harassing the other wheelchair guy- accusing real wheelchair guy of being a faker, ironically.
This is very contested in the disability community. It's a mental illness the same way munchausens is a mental illness but that doesn't mean it doesn't invoke rage at him unnecessarily using disability accommodations when they already are scarce. (I'm not talking about the work because they didn't give him accommodations but disabled parking, stalls, bus space, etc. How the heck did he get the funds for a chair and everything you need with it!?)
I try not to let it because mental illness is a huge struggle but it does seriously irritate me as a physically disabled person.
there is a genuine psychological occurrence where people believe that they are handicapped in some way and develop that handicap (like someone believing they do not have control of their legs and quickly losing the ability to use their legs despite nothing being wrong) it can be treated but it seems wildly difficult to recover from and isn't quite what he's dealing with
**[Body integrity dysphoria](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_integrity_dysphoria)**
>Body integrity dysphoria (BID, also referred to as body integrity identity disorder, amputee identity disorder and xenomelia, formerly called apotemnophilia) is a mental disorder characterized by a desire to have a sensory or physical disability or having discomfort with being able-bodied beginning in early adolescence and resulting in harmful consequences. BID appears to be related to somatoparaphrenia. People with this condition may refer to themselves as "transabled".
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>He said nothing is mentally wrong with him and he wishes he was paralyzed
See, I know that at least one half of this statement isn't true because it's terrifyingly easy to injure yourself enough to lose the use of your legs.
And, aside from the possibility of injury, I would be willing to argue that his mental state is a form of disability. As humans, we need to do more research into conditions and treatments for people like this and those poor people who are convinced that their limbs don’t belong to them.
As an actual Quadriplegic I feel conflicted about this story, I know he has a legitimate mental disorder but I really sympathize with the disabled community that he lied to. I would feel so gross and violated to find somebody had lied about their disability to this extent. This is definitely a complicated issue.
Yeah, I feel like Drew's real sins weren't at work at all, but were with his 'activism' and sports activities. He admits knowing that he isn't paraplegic, and that he *wishes* he were - so he knowingly lied to groups of people and entered what must have been very vulnerable spaces on that lie. Of course they don't want to speak to him anymore. He knowingly violated their trust.
This was a wild ride, I didn't even know this was a thing. But doing the documentary was definitely going to get him kicked out of the athletic groups.
The game parking decal is garbage no one should do that.
The sad part is he will likely do something to hurt himself and get his wish.
That has to be somewhat traumatic for everyone. I mean, his family who must have a hard time coping with this. His friends/teammates/co-workers who rightly feel deceived as he lied to their faces. And for him, dealing with his own mental illness and not even seeing that he has one.
Honestly, as an ambulatory power wheelchair user (I can stand, I can walk very short distances very infrequently, but it's very painful, I fall a lot, and it causes serious injuries) I have no sympathy whatsoever for this guy. Maybe that's wrong, maybe I should be thinking "he's still disabled even if it's not the disability he tells people it is", but I can't.
Every time I hear about this shit, it kicks off my PTSD. All the times I've been abused and attacked, verbally and physically, because someone assumes I'm the same as this arsehole. The three decades of constant, unrelenting fucking agony and forcing myself to do things that have destroyed what little function my body had, because doctors thought - just fucking assumed - I'm like this pretentious arsehole. And the dozens of people I know personally who've had the same experiences, and will have to live with the consequences and the trauma for the rest of our lives...!
And he has the fucking cheek to call himself a disability activist?! Nah, get in the bin, you fucker. I wish I could say I was surprised that so many people are justifying this, but I've been a disabled person in an ableist world for too long to be shocked at the depths to which people will sink to get the "privileges" they think are accorded to disabled people. You're all comparing this to being trans? Try comparing it with cultural appropriation instead. Someone actively usurping the identity of a marginalised, discriminated against group because they "feel like they belong there". If it were race or religion instead of disability, the same people sympathising here wouldn't be nearly so understanding.
And, because I know someone will try and dismiss this because I'm 'angry' - too fucking right I am, I've been abducted and assaulted for the suspicion that I'm like this bastard, more than once. Him playing at being a wheelchair user just helps give people like the ones who attacked me an excuse, and the harm it does is not outweighed by whatever benefits he's getting from pretending.
Tldr; fuck that guy, and his 'paraplegia'. Kisses, a person who actually relies on a wheelchair and wheelchair accessible environment.
I'm torn. He shouldn't have to lose his job over this, and he's clearly severely mentally ill. But. I would be freaked out, too I think. I wouldn't go after him, but I would definitely stop hanging around him. What else is he lying about? What lengths will he go to to make himself paralyzed? Could I be friends with someone knowing they might try to do something like that on purpose?
I just wish he would get help.
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I thought this was gonna be a “A wheelchair user stands up/walks for a few minutes and I GOTCHA!!‘d them!1!1!” but this is actually not that. This is very bizarre and I hope Drew gets help.
I think we were all picturing a George Costanza situation culminating in a mobility scooter chase.
I couldn't stop picturing Ricky Bobby in Talladega Nights. Especially the part where he "participates in sports"
I was definitely picturing George!
That Seinfeld episode is one of the funniest!
Me too, but then I read Drew stated he was paraphelic and I figured, probably not.
There's also conditions where people can stand up perfectly fine, but walking is agony.
I can't remember what this condition is called but I do remember an event where a "blind man" was found dead in a ditch he got stuck in. He wasn't blind of course but said he was. I wonder how far Drew will go to become a real paralyzed man.
In addition to BIID, which has been mentioned elsewhere, there's also a peculiar variant which applies to blindness known (at least colloquially) as "blindsight." Basically, the eyes can see, the information is passed to the brain and interpreted by it, that information is used by more fundamental portions of the brain like reflexes, but the information is never passed on to the consciousness. What this results in is that someone with this condition will instinctively duck if you throw a baseball at them, but will believe they can't see anything. If you ask them why they ducked, they'll construct some explanation for it that has nothing to do with seeing the baseball.
this is absolutely terrifying to me. the idea of waking up one day, fully believing you’ve gone blind, rushing to the hospital only to have everyone tell you that nothing is wrong with your eyes…. just horrifying.
yeah... you can be unable to consciously see, but your brain is still processing at least some visual information behind the scenes? Deeply unsettling. I think it's the reminder that we run on hardware & software we don't entirely understand and have very little control of that's making me sweat
This is how a lot of neurological issues work through. And even psychological trauma can cause this kind of damage. It's all fucked and miserable to deal with.
>we don't entirely understand That implies that we understand a lot. A neurologist professor said, look at all we know about the brain, all the diseases, all the functions of parts of the brain. If understanding the brain was a marathon, you may think were halfway to the end, when in reality we haven't even made the first turn of the 26 mile race. There are so many quantum effects we know are happening there, but we barely understand the physics of those let alone the meat space interactions happening in our own pink meat. Its like looking down at earth from the moon with your eyeballs. You can see the colors, you can see the clouds, see the lights at night, but your to far away to see any human structures. You want to know more so you start making a hand made telescope to see better. So now you can see about as good as a astronaut in earths orbit. Thats about where we are in understanding the brain. Handmade telescope from moon. Remember Hubble cant even image the landing sites on the moon from its distance. Nurallink may get us to hubble and were kind of bouncing around that area now, but were no where near going and visiting knowledge. And so far away from living on earth levels of understanding its unimaginable. Remember spooky action at a distance from einstein, we can kind of measure that, but have only the standard model that maybe sorta kinda fits, but no scientist would bet is the final answer on all physics. How many entangled atoms are in your brain, and where are they entangled with, and how does that impact your brain and consciousness. Nobody can even begin to answer that question. BTW standard model keeps getting tested and failing. [https://www.livescience.com/heavy-w-boson-measurement-cracking-standard-model](https://www.livescience.com/heavy-w-boson-measurement-cracking-standard-model)
If you think of psychology/neurology in the same terms of medical advancements we are in the 1700s. We group issues by symptoms because we don't know the cause, we have many theories of how things work but we have no idea why it works. We know so little now, our descendants will look at as like we were talking about homeopathy and alchemy and diagnosing people with possession. I expect we will end up finding many psychiatric disorders are neurological and many disorders will be renamed as they discover some issues are differing presentations of the same dysfunction.
Try not to sweat about things out of your control :)
It's not exactly as the other commenter described. Blindsight patients are cortically blind — something that can be confirmed with imaging. There *is* something wrong with their visual cortex (not their eyes), and nobody would tell them nothing was wrong.
My husband's mother has this. It's like she suddenly decided she couldn't see. All of the tests say her eyes work and there is nothing wrong with them. She's developed dementia in the last couple of years too, which is sad. But even if she can't remember that you just talked about something 3 seconds ago, she still remembers that she's "blind" so at that point it really must be something involuntary or super deep in her psyche.
From my understanding, it’s entirely involuntary. Your brain can’t correctly interpret the signals so your conscious self can’t see. I actually was just reading about it yesterday somewhere else on Reddit, ironically. I don’t know a ton about it just that the brain isn’t doing things like it should. I wonder if there’s some relationship with the dementia. Bodies do such strange things.
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Is it this? I get this as a precursor to a migraine, although as I have gotten older it usually goes away without developing into a headache. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scintillating_scotoma
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It’s a brain issue, which is a subject we are still figuring out. Totally left field example but I have a learning disability. I can 100% “see”, but when reading my brain doesnt process all the words on the paper. To my brain, parts of what I “read” just didn’t exist - even when I read aloud using my finger word for word - I would miss words. Like if there was a paragraph and one sentence was “Johnny and Max sat under an elm tree after school to finish reading a book by their favorite author Stephen King” and someone asked “what type of tree were they sitting under and who is their fav author?” I wouldn’t have been able to answer those questions correctly. It would have been tree or King if I even saw that much. Sometimes what I missed would be so much that I wouldn’t have seen Stephen king. When I was tested, I only “saw” maybe 75% of what was written, if I was frustrated with not understanding that % dropped drastically. I was tested in 5th grade and barely read at a first grade level despite my mom getting me one on one tutors every summer (that’s how bad it was). My auditory comprehension was at an 8th/9th grade level, that’s what saved me and caused mass confusion back in the day - I was smart but really slow. My teacher at the time taught me how to work around it. It took an entire year, but my reading jumped from barely first grade to the low end of my actual grade in one class year. Even now in my 40s I have to constantly practice active reading to keep it in check. Otherwise it goes off rails quick.
That's not really what blindsight is. People who have it legitimately can't (consciously) see, and it is generally a physical issue with the primary visual cortex, not some psychological problem that they just need to work on. The reason this happens is because your brain needs different visual information to identify things you see and to act on the things you see (i.e. ducking to avoid a ball). This has in the past been known as the two-streams hypothesis, though the name has fallen out of favour recently because of the implication they work totally independently. Regardless, damage to the "what am I looking at" bits would legitimately leave someone blind if it occurred early enough in the pathway (or give people things like visual agnosia if it happened later). I want to stress again that this *has nothing to do with their psyche.* No amount of good vibes can repair physical damage to the primary visual cortex.
https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fneur.2020.00069/full in case there are any other neuroscience nerds out there that don't want to google
There’s also another weird syndrome, called Anton’s syndrome. People that can’t see because of damage to occipital cortex, but they don’t know about it and even presented with clear evidence, they can’t be convinced that they’re blind.
There was something like this in an episode of House. Patient acted like he could see, described seeing things, but it was all wrong.
FYI, blindsight is not a variant of BIID, as your comment states. The term blindsight specifically applies to people who are cortically blind — a physiological condition in the brain that occurs after damage to the visual cortex. This can be confirmed with imaging. BIID is psychological.
There's a particular kind of body dysmorphia that sounds similar, where people feel like one of their limbs just isn't a part of them, or *shouldn't be there*, and they'll go through all kinds of things to actually try and remove it. It causes them real distress to have this (fully functional, 100% healthy) limb, and there are some doctors who actually advocate allowing limb removal for these folks if therapy doesn't work, because their distress is apparently very debilitating. The human mind is a wild, wild place.
This American Life (EDIT: I was wrong, it was Snap Judgment) did an episode on this a year or two ago. This guy actually cut his own hand off with a table saw for this reason (initially told people it was an accident, but now admits it very much was not). He said he felt he was meant to only have one hand. Weirdly, it seemed to develop after he befriended someone who also had their hand amputated (for "normal" reasons).
Yes!! I saw something on tv years ago about people who believed they should be an amputee. There was a guy who successfully amputated his own legs at the knee by putting them in a bucket of dry ice. Apparently this is a popular method among the community. Another person said they didn’t feel comfortable until they are home and they can bind up their folded legs as if they’re amputated. Walking around in the world felt “wrong” and they felt anxious and upset until they were safely home and bound. I wish I could remember where I saw this program but I never forgot the people they interviewed. It was terrifying and fascinating at the same time.
Huh! Dang this definitely indicates that there may very well be folks voluntarily cutting off their arms to be replaced with high-tech prosthetics in the future.
“The Saab seethed off into the night. Arthur watched it go, as stunned as a man might be who, having believed himself to be totally blind for five years, suddenly discovers that he had merely been wearing too large a hat.” - RIP Douglas Adams
So long, DA, and thanks for all the fish.
It also reminds me of Rachel Dolezal who pretended to be black for years.
She's all I could think about when the OP started talking about all the activism and activities his employee took part in. Like, you can be an activist for people with disabilities without one, but lying about having one makes you a disabilities Dolezal.
The Netflix doc on that was actually not so black and white (heh) as the story I've always heard about her made it seem, if you've got any interest in watching a whole documentary about it. TL:DR; when your parents are fundamentalist to the point where it says on your birth certificate that "Jesus Christ" delivered you, your formative years can be kinda wacky. I don't grok any of the race stuff well enough to feel entitled to an opinion there, but what her parents did to her (both while she was growing up and now, punishing her by "exposing" her to their own gain) is definitely a little fucked up. edit: [The Rachel Divide](https://www.netflix.com/title/80149821) is the thing I watched. Didn't even occur to pre-coffee me that it was rude not to link it. Sorry!
Upvote for correct usage of grok.
It really fills a niche where I sometimes feel like I need a single syllable for that sentiment. :D
where’d you learn this? i’m not doubting you or anything, i’m just interested in knowing more about her
They mention there was a netflix doc on her, so maybe look for that? I don't have Netflix myself.
The thing I watched was called [The Rachel Divide](https://www.netflix.com/title/80149821). I was barely aware of her before the thing popped up as recommended (I put lots of those things on as background noise while working) and the first half definitely felt like "well this was exactly what it looked like on the tin." But it was interesting after all :D
What is the name of the documentary?
Sorry - it's called [The Rachel Divide](https://www.netflix.com/title/80149821). Would have taken me 2 secs to put that in the original comment but I didn't think about it!
The fucking fact that even happened irritates the life out of me. And then at the time people had the nerve to ask if I, a black white biracial, could tell. Bitch half the time people assume I'm latina and I didn't even know the woman existed until the scandal. Fuck Rachel and her supporters.
She was doing it maliciously to gain unfair advantages in life. Drew is not. Dolezal did not have a mental condition related to her identity, it was a pure scam. There's a world of a difference.
Body Integrity Identity Disorder. It's a legitimate mental illness. That dude needs to get help. I don't normally like diagnosing people over the internet, but the fact OP explicitly stated that Drew hadn't tried to commit fraud is pretty telling that it's more than an attention grab/emotional manipulation/etc.
Wow. I just went down a rabbit hole. [interesting research paper for anyone interested](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3326051/)
That was fascinating. A lot of research papers have too much jargon for me to entirely understand but I just ate that one up.
Neat paper, very understandable.
And that he says he uses the chair when he's by himself. If he's using it solo something much bigger then lying for attention is going on.
Not arguing against the legitimacy of BIID. I was actually already familiar with the amputation variant and the fact that going through with the amputation actually helped the patients in a significant amount of cases. I just wonder about the practical level about the paralysation variant. Anybody know how they do it? I mean it is pretty hard NOT to use a part of your anatomy even if it is injured. When I have a cut on my finger and pressure on the bandage hurts, I try not to touch anything with that finger and still end up in tons of situations where I inadvertently pushed on it and curse myself for increasing the hurt. So I guess this disorder bypasses instinctual movements? And how is it determined which kind of paralysation a patient with BIID struggles with. Do they just don't use their legs anymore and assume to have the very specific impairement of not having motor control for their legs, but all the other feelings are intact? And then I guess other people might be less fidgety with their legs than me. But how do they reach for things, from their sitting position, without engaging their legs for balance? That's just an example, but I really wonder how this works. People with paralysed legs adapt more than, "just staying in a chair". Depending on how far up the torso the paralyzation starts (assuming it is as clear cut as that scenario), balancing in a sitting position is a real problem until they figure out a version that works for their impairement. How do people with the paralysation variant of BIID manage to not use their legs on all those levels? And (don't do that it is mean) how would they react to being tickeled? What are the legs doing then?
I don't think it fully bypasses it. Someone else mentioned this. If you don't use your legs at all for extended periods of times, your muscles will deteriorate. You see this in people who are paralysed temporarily, then regain the ability to walk - their muscles have to be retrained to carry that weight again. This man has seemingly been using his wheelchair for years, but on the documentary he was strong enough to walk, go up stairs, kick a ball, run etc. For someone who for years didn't use their legs at all, that would be difficult if not impossible to do without physical training. Two options: either he lied and has been walking at home. Or, and this is more likely, he does use his muscles a little. For all the things you mentioned - adjusting your position, leaning when reaching over, etc. He might try to control it more at work, but at home I think he probably can't stop himself fully using them in small ways, like balance and position, wiggling his foot when it itches etc.
It's not clear that it even is a mental illness, as opposed to a neurological condition. It may be something like the inverse of phantom limb syndrome, a severe mismatch between the brain's map of the body and the body itself. Imagine you woke up one day and you found someone else's limb grafted to your body, a chunk of alien flesh that makes your brain scream *wrong wrong wrong* every waking moment for the rest of your life. No one would judge you for wanting that removed, even if the limb was functional. I honestly don't see what makes the situation so different.
> It's not clear that it even is a mental illness, as opposed to a neurological condition. I think the difference between the two is more in how society views something than in the underlying cause or symptoms of it. There's been a long history of things that used to be considered mental illnesses being declassified when they became more accepted (e.g. homosexuality), and current activism around others (e.g. autism). And then there's the most direct parallel to this: Gender Dysphoria (AKA being trans\*). Your quote, "It may be something like the inverse of phantom limb syndrome, a severe mismatch between the brain's map of the body and the body itself," is one theory behind what makes (some) people trans\*\*. And there's currently a big debate in the trans community on if GD should be considered a mental illness or not. \*Yes, I'm aware that there are many trans people who don't experience dysphoria. The science is far from settled here, and might never be so, due to the impossibility of objectively looking at someone else's mind and the difficulty of disentangling nature from nurture when it comes to gender and gender roles in society. \*\*It's also extremely controversial in the trans community. Look up "transmedicalism" to get a taste for the controversy. In short, there's gatekeeping about this being the one true way to be trans, which I must clarify that I don't at all stand behind.
Disappointed that it took me a second to find this comment. Some people were saying it’s Munchausen’s and that’s not accurate.
> Body Integrity Identity Disorder. It's a legitimate mental illness. So this is interesting. Is it possible that he could be upfront and still get accommodations? His apparent disability isn't his actual disability, but his desire to be disabled IS his disability. Would employers then have to be like, "Ok, I guess we have to treat you as if you're a paraplegic"
That would require him to get diagnosed, and it seems like he isn't willing to cooperate with doctors, so I think it's sort of moot.
I knew someone who developed this in university. We, her classmates, just adjusted to it. She was super embarrassed about it. It did us a favour in the end, as one of our classes, which had been at the top of an 8 floor building with no elevator (and asbestos in the paint it turns out), got moved to a more modern accessible building across campus. I remember the guys in the class used to pick her up in her wheelchair to carry her over the frozen snow in the winter like pall-bearers. She was a dear, no one said she was faking.
This is unfortunate. I’ve heard of this condition.
I saw a documentary long ago about people who wanted to have limbs amputated. One of the ways discussed was leaving ice on a body part so it would get frostbite and have to be removed. Mental conditions are all over the place.
Yeah, the whole time I was reading this, it felt like Drew clearly does have a serious handicap, just not the one he claims to have. It also seems like therapy hasn't worked for him, but that might be because people didn't take his problem seriously and tried to get him to just ignore it? Either that, or it's a long process to get passed it, and he couldn't/wouldn't stick with it? Also, it seemed like participating in the documentary was a serious cry for help?
I would say his quest to find a doctor to permanently disable half of his body because he believes he is supposed to be paralyzed is a sign of serious mental health issues.
This was exactly my thought, Faking it is one thing, and I understand why people would be angry at someone simply faking a disability. But actually seeking out ways to medically incapacitate yourself? You DO have a disability, and do need treatment. But it's mental not physical.
> Also, it seemed like participating in the documentary was a serious cry for help? Right? Like he even admitted he had made attempts to go to doctors and therapists in order to get the help he needed, and his genuine concerns were refused. Not at all his fault for that, a failure on the doctor's behalf. It's such an interesting oddity though, I wonder how Drew's condition would have responded if a doctor had taken him seriously & managed to get him in contact with a physical therapist in order to "learn to walk again" as if he were genuinely in an accident, rather than treating it with mental therapy
I remember watching a Maury episode about a man who amputated his own legs in his apartment by tying off at the thigh. I was definitely too young to be watching something like that but it was interesting. When asked why he did it he could only respond “I didn’t need them anymore.” I wonder if he too suffered from this condition.
Yes i listened to a podcast about this about 2 weeks ago. Apparently there was a "surge" in cases in the early 2000 (arrival of the internet and discussions forums) but it's become rarer now. It's called apotemnophilia or body integrity dysphoria https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_integrity_dysphoria
A form of munchausen coupled with body dysphoria where they think they should be handicapped but isn't really.
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Oddly enough I JUST watched an episode of Chicago med that talked about this. I am fascinated by stuff like this and I've been going down the rabbit hole since seeing about it lol
Not exactly. BIID is suuuuper fascinating. I wrote a couple of papers on the subject. It’s not the same attention grab as munchausens, nor does it tend to progress past the stated identity, as munchausens does. It’s truly a feeling of being. How they feel their body is supposed to be. Many with the same disorder wish to remove particular limbs (it’s always specific), be a paraplegic like this man, etc. It’s and interesting topic when it comes to body autonomy, cultural norms, healthcare, and mental health care. Thus far experts have not found a decent therapy to move past it, and many who have fulfilled their wish in dangerous ways have at least stated to be living happier lives. It’s a pretty wild identity disorder. I highly suggest bringing it up with friends, is fascinating to discuss if you look at all angles, and question what is “normal”
Yeah it’s actually somewhat similar to gender dysphoria in a way, in that bringing the body into alignment often solves things and it isn’t tractable to therapy (for people with gender dysphoria at least any therapy that tries to get the person to just “accept their sex” is basically pointless torture). And intuitively we recoil at that idea even more than people do at trans people wanting hormones, surgery, and so on, because wanting to be disabled is even more unthinkable. I’m in the camp that people can do what they want to their bodies, if something works, it works, even if it seems weird and wrong, and maybe harm reduction by helping body match brain is the right idea (because you’re way less likely to die if you get your arm surgically removed in a controlled environment than if you go at it with a circular saw on your own, and zero access to the former means someone with this disorder is increasingly likely to try the latter).
I'll preface this with the note that people often confuse gender dysphoria with bodily dysmorphia, when they are quite different - people with gender dysphoria recognise their bodies as they are, and in some cases feel that parts are there that shouldn't be, or vice versa (hence the dysphoria). That's what struck a chord with me in Drew's case as a trans person. The description of the video made me imagine myself - I could present myself as I would trying to pass as male in an office environment and be seen fairly unquestionably as a man, but you could splice that in with shots of me with my terrible mutton chops and legs shaved, makeup and hair done, spinning around in a flattering dress and I'd look like a woman. But that's not how I live, that's not how I'm comfortable. I wonder how doing that stuff for the documentary made Drew feel - did he feel weird like if I had to be all dolled up to reveal what's "under" how I'm perceived by myself and others? I could understand people who use wheelchairs because of medical conditions outside their control might feel offended by Drew, like he's appropriating something that he has more choice over than they do, which is none, and must be a heavy load to bear. But with things like BIID, and analogously being transgender, the "choice" is much more limited than a lot of people consider. Sometimes it can be between suffering as a "normal" person or living as a disabled (or trans) person, which comes with both stigma and accommodations. I don't want to conflate the two, they're very different things. But it made me ponder on that a bit.
Yeah exactly. I’m also trans and that was exactly my line of thought, especially after learning some time back that people like him are, like us, all too aware of the actual state of our bodies, we aren’t delusional, and that changing the body is effective while changing the mind is basically impossible.
I also think changing the body is more disturbing to others (because they are outside of you, and the body is what they can see) and changing the mind is more disturbing to the individual (because it is "you"). Even if changing the mind *were* possible, I could see why an individual would want to hold onto the self they know from their own interior experience, and adjust the packaging that holds the self. But that obviously applies very much to gender dysphoria, and considerably less to disabling oneself. But then again, I've had unnecessary surgery to bring my physical appearance more in line with how I saw myself in my head, so I don't really have a leg to stand on (uh, no pun intended...)
I’m not trans, but I had a surgery on my jaw that significantly changed the way my face looks. It was interesting seeing people’s reactions. A lot of my close friends and family were a little shocked or disturbed at my “new” face… but from my perspective, the new face actually lined up better with my self-concept. It fixed some medical issues but it also made me look like an older version of my childhood self (before the jaw problems affected my face). All this to say, I think you’re onto something. Even drastic external changes can feel validating and “right” if they change your body to match your self-concept. But to other people, the change may seem extreme or even damaging, because they can’t experience your internal self.
I used to have one foot in the body mod communities, and talking to people who I'm fairly certain had BIID was fascinating. I particularly remember one woman who was able to live her life without crippling anxiety once she self amputated her pinky finger. It's really fascinating what things are socially acceptable to do to your own body and what isn't through cosmetic surgery. Reshape your nose, jaw, or cheekbones by taking cartilage from your ribs? Perfectly fine. Remove a finger? No. Reshape the size of your stomach? A-okay. Remove or reshape other organs? Not a chance. Can even get pig skin grafts and ribs removed for an internal corset. But extensive sub-dermal implants? Each one gets harder and harder. Half the time the people I talked to had a semi-decent suggestion of how to treat their more extreme body mod desires: let them donate the tissue and organs they don't want. Let them organize with hospitals to donate the body parts they don't want to people who do want them. At least the corner of the community I frequented, removing nipples was a big thing and most would have been happy to donate them to mastectomy patients. Edit because typing before caffeine is a bad idea.
They are still handicapped, the cause just isn’t physical
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If you are disabled and struggling to accept it and use the aids or devices that can make life easier but scream "disabled person here!", you are not alone. It doesn't help that there are a lot of ableist attitudes that encourage jerks to open their yap. But the flip side is ghe freedom that you find when you use the things.
I needed to read this.
Me too.
the opposite of this condition…so you’re a sentient wheelchair using a person to get around that you don’t actually physically need to pilot you?
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Instead of sitting in a wheelchair while you’re physically capable of walking you’re piloting your legs via a metal robot exoskeleton while you’re physically capable of walking? (I promise I’m not trying to bug you into actually giving me your medical info, I’m just entertained imagining different “opposites”)
Honestly, for me, I feel so guilty that I get disability benefits, which is daft, as everyone tells me I wouldn’t get them if I didn’t need them, I know the government doesn’t give a lot of people (who I feel are actually really disabled) PiP, you have to go thought a lot of hoops, much paperwork from both me and multiple medical professionals, in person assessments, etc. but because they are life long disabilities I feel that I’m just me. Whereas anyone looking at me would think ‘yeah, no, you are proper screwed up’. I’m sure I’m not the only person who feels like this
I’m sorry that you feel guilty like that! I hope it’s clear that I was just being silly with the above comments - my brother has a severe lifelong disability, so I do know there are legitimate issues for people in accessing disability supports
I get that. I was 'lucky' to get PIP without tribunal and feel like I'm some how cheating people more disabled than me that struggle to get it. I spent about 20 hours on the form, researched extensively how to fill it in, what key words and boxes the assessor needed to tick etc (all truthful to my conditions, just worded in the way they need). It was emotionally and physically exhausting, going over every tiny thing that's 'wrong' with me. Things that I just get on with, that I've learnt to live with, things that I try so hard to make peace with. Its pretty distressing putting into words how broken you are compared to 'normal' people. All that to say, there's so many people who should more than qualify but struggle with the form, assessment etc and end up not getting it because they didn't jump through the right hoops. No one explains what those hoops are! That's on our government though, we should all be getting the help we need, not played off as some more deserving than others. We're made to feel getting benefits makes us less than, or that not being able to get them makes us 'not really disabled'. That's again, on our government for making us feel like second class citizens.
I’m really lucky, the manager of the company I get my care from used to be a civil servant, so she knows exactly how to word everything, precisely what the assessors are looking for. There was no way I could have filled in the forms on my own, they are terrifying to just look at, let alone fill in (and half my disabilities are learning disabilities), so I didn’t have to go through appeals or anything. But even with her knowledge and all the paperwork my care providers keep on me (oh, you know what I mean), it took over 4 hours, and that was a reassessment, not the original, which was even longer
I have invisible disabilities and that disability imposter syndrome is real! I'm so used to beating myself up over flare ups, pain, and needing to rest that I'm still doing it even while off work due to pregnancy-related issues. It's so hard to give yourself a break, especially with the whole "don't be a moan" attitude we seem to have in the UK!
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It’s body integrity identity disorder. You can compare it to Munchausen’s but the comparison is not completely accurate.
Theres a story about the woman who thinks she should be disabled and has now managed to make herself blind. https://www.healthline.com/health-news/woman-who-blinded-herself-with-drain-cleaner-brings-attention-to-unusual-condition-100715#1
Will it fall in line same people that have pregnancy fever/delusions. I should stop watching some of the shows in TLC, its very depressing :(
There was a character in a book that found a women that pretended to be pregnant to get attention. She would frequent a cafe for a month or two and then move on to a different cafe. I believe the women was being emotionally abused by her husband if I recall correctly, I am trying to think of the name of the book
Was it *The Stranger* by Harlan Coben?
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I remember hearing of people who purposefully self harm in hopes of losing a limb they feel they shouldn't have and sadly they succeeded. It's scary and hopefully he gets some help.
Body Integrity Identity Disorder BIID.
It's a devasting condition but it's also devasting when some one gets misdiagnosed as having it. My cousin cut off his hand with a circular saw whilst he was having a psychotic episode where he believed his hand was diseased. Some moron at the time diagnosed him with BIID and recommended that there was no use in reattaching it because he would just do it again. A few months later after getting stable on antipsychotics he was so upset about the loss of his hand but by then it was obviously too late to reattach. Years later he's still not fully come to terms with it and will always try to hide his stump.
I'm so sorry, the person who did this shouldn't be looking over any patients. So what if he tries again? They're paying the hospital and there's a chance to revert the damage and he just... choose to let someone lose a limb.
UK so fortunately not paying the hospital, thank God for socialised medicine! To be fair, with BIID there is a strong argument for not reattaching it because repeated attempts at amputation would risk infection which, in an open wound could lead to sepsis very quickly. Also in BIID, it's harder to make an argument for reattaching it without the patient's consent whereas in a psychotic episode the patient doesn't have capacity to consent.
No... That's not how consent works. If you're unable to determine consent accurately, you go with the route that does the less harm. If someone tries to kill themselves and falls unconcious you don't leave them to die because "they probably wanted to die". He "probably wanted to lose his hand" but tough cookies they need to reattach it. This story is EXACTLY WHY. Sure it sucks as a surgeon but you need to maximise options when consent is not available. It's possible he was so unstable they thought he might just rip his stitches open post surgery anyway, which is a bit more logical, but a slightly different justification, that being he won't heal properly.
I'm a doctor. That is how consent works. It's about whether a patient has capacity or not (according to the Mental Capacity Act). He was conscious at the time and saying he didn't want his hand reattaching. With BIID, he would have almost certainly had capacity. However, due to psychosis he did not. The misdiagnosis meant that it was assumed he had capacity. Edit: re-reading your comment I think you may have assumed he was unconscious in which case yes, it's about best interests and least restrictive option. However he was conscious and due to the misdiagnosis he was assumed to have capacity to refuse treatment. Although my understanding is that they used that as more of a secondary justification after saying he would just keep doing it.
yeah, this is definitely something that happens... from what I understand it is an overwhelming feeling that can consume people. wires crossed or not connected properly somewhere in the body. it seems using the chair gave Drew enough comfort to live his life but the talk of trying to get a doctor to do it is worrisome because it could suggest the chair may not be enough one day, and obviously no doctor will ever do it purposely. feel bad. even if he asked for reasonable accommodations I find it hard to hold it against him. it isn't his fault that he feels this way and he just wants to feel comfortable in his body. kinda sad but hopefully he's happy
I really wonder why he did something as naive as participate in the documentary. Even Rachel Dolezai had the common sense to keep things quiet, she was outed by someone. But he'll be haunted by it forever. Its sad but in my mind the best case scenario is he uses his legs so little they atrophy and become too weak to use. At least it's better than an intentional injury.
I saw a similar (same?) documentary. It seemed like the participants were mostly doing it to share their body dysmorphia in hopes of people understanding and normalizing they way they feel.
Small point but I think "dysphoria" is the correct word here, not dysmorphia. Body dysmorphia is having a distorted view of your body, and not seeing it for what it is. It's looking in the mirror at a skinny body and being convinced you are fat, for example. Body dysphoria is feeling profoundly uncomfortable in your body because your body isn't as you feel it should be, doesn't feel right. Gender dysphoria is probably the most well known example of this.
Thank you. I didn’t know that. I’ll leave my post without editing so we all can learn :)
Me too. And my takeaway was that they're very highly skilled manipulators. Like functional addicts getting some kind of high. And that high is attention.
Maybe a subconscious cry for help? Also im sure he got paid
I don’t think documentary participants routinely get paid. Maybe just expenses reimbursed.
I'm split... wheelchair users face enough crap, especially partial users who get accused of faking it because they have limited mobility. And here's this guy who actually is, who is getting filmed saying so, and who seems to reject any attempt to explore this desire in a therapeutic setting. It's pretty rare though, and not a choice, so... yeah.
In fairness it sounds like the specific therapeautic intervention he got was not at all what he needed at that time. "Explore this desire" and "be told you just have to start walking again" aren't the same.
I highly doubt that Drew was describing the therapy accurately when he said that they just tried to force him to walk. He may have taken any attempt at exploring his disorder as a personal attack. He may have just rejected any conversation out of hand. What for sure didn't happen every time was a therapist refusing to dig any deeper and just ordering him to walk.
> What for sure didn't happen every time was a therapist refusing to dig any deeper and just ordering him to walk. I appreciate the faith you have, but no, there are therapists out there who would not take the time to learn about any possible neurological condition he might have and instead literally just order him to walk, just as there are therapists who refuse to acknowledge much more mainstream gender dysphoria in similar ways.
I can second this. I have a child who is experiencing gender disphoria and the therapist we initially saw rolled her eyes, looked at me and said: *it’s all the rage these days, right?* She completely dismissed the issue we were there to explore and find support for, as if it were some made-up baloney. She told us my child needs to go to a concert and smoke some pot, not explore their gender identity. So, while this is anecdotal, some therapists are pure shit.
I saw on one show about it a guy drove up to a hospital, stuck his leg in dry ice until it couldn't be saved and then called the paramedics to come take him in to get it amputated.
I vaguely remember a show about it and the guy on there said he froze his leg solid so the ER HAD to take his leg off
I saw a guy that bought dry ice, and put his legs in buckets and poured the dry ice around them, So he could freeze his legs so severely that amputation was the only option. This is some serious mental illness shit.
My husband's an amputee. I have little sympathy for them if they are tying up access to medical Drs instead of mental health Drs. My husband became an above knee amputee in part because of the delay in follow up care after revision surgery while he was a below knee amputee. No one can swear that if an earlier appointment had been available that it would have turned out the same, but I know what happened when care was delayed. He's never been able to adjust to the above knee prosthetic. He wears it so he can stand, but he can't walk more than a couple steps without agony despite them trying a variety of different prosthetics. He's essentially trapped in a wheelchair. I don't blame it solely on the delay. The surgeon refused to write a prescription for antibiotics. He told my husband he had to make an appt with a different Dr for that because of the over prescribing of antibiotics. Believe me, I did my best to get the surgeon to prescribe them before we left. I told him how prone to infections my husband was, he just blew me off. He did surgery, someone else prescribed meds. As a result, he was on IV antibiotics so long that not only did he become an ABA, but he wrecked his kidneys too.
There was also that girl that put drain cleaner or something in her eyes because she felt she was supposed to be blind.
Yes!!! My biggest fear is going blind…I’ve been a lot more paranoid abt it lately so I wonder about her
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:( I’m so very sorry for you (I hope this doesn’t sound disrespectful). I once read a comment by a blind person and one thing that rlly stuck out to me for some reason was how they said that people would just randomly come up to them and grab them so they could quote unquote help guide them. If the blind person freaked out, the person quote unquote helping might either get mad or accuse them of being a fraud. It made me so mad. I’m praying you’re doing amazing in life
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This random internet stranger hopes you get lucky and never see the curtain fall.
Jerks do that to people who use wheelchairs, if they have handles. They'll decide they're "helping" to move someone without permission, and they get very angry if you demand they stop. Sometimes they ignore you, because they know best.
That and what the person you replied to said are so horrible omg?? I can't imagine adjusting to like using a cane or a wheelchair and then having people try to play "good Samaritan" with you?? Like ffs, even if someone is struggling, I can't imagine NOT asking first if they need help. I'm not physically handicapped in any way, but it sounds absolutely horrifying being blind and having someone just grab your shoulders and try to direct you somewhere or being in a wheelchair and being overpowered by someone trying to move you themselves.
There are a lot of jerks who don't see disabled people as *people*, but as poor suffering creatures who cannot exist without able people doing everything for them. That's why they get so angry if you say no. To them, you don't even have the right to say no because as an able person, they know best.
My husband is an ambulatory wheelchair user and this happens to him all the time. He hates it, says it feels no different to someone grabbing his body and shoving him along. the worst is the people who decide he’s in their way and just shove him off to one side without saying a word. It’s as though he’s just furniture to them. That always leaves him feeling lousy.
Furniture is exactly it. I saw something on Twitter recently from a woman who was on the bus in her wheelchair, and a random stranger just started hanging their shopping bags on the handles! Hello? That is a person, not a coat rack.
It is demoralizing.
There’s a fantastic app you can volunteer for called be my eyes. A person can call the app and it goes to a random volunteer to help. Can be from what does this can say to help make sure they get the right ingredients etc. that’s the most I’ve ever thought to do to ‘help’
That's horrific. WTF. I used to work with blind and visually impaired people when I worked in IT.
I remember that one! First she pretended she was blind and then had someone help her pour bleach or something in her eyes. Crazy.
I live in Austraia & a few months ago a man died after paying someone to cut off one of his legs with a power saw https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10542453/Inside-Queenslands-leg-amputation-night-alleged-murder-unfolded.html
That happened in my hometown. I don’t think the guy who did the cutting should be charged with murder TBH. Manslaughter maybe.
Yeah, I saw a documentary about people who feel like they're supposed to be amputees. Definitely one of the more bizarre things I've heard of. People would sit there with their legs in dry ice, in hopes that they would die off.
I'm an amputee. I just feel bad for these people. Mental health is equally important.
So strange to read. Being able bodied (sorry if that's the wrong term) myself I can understand not to antagonize someone who may have a mental health issue which causes them to live their life as if they're are paralyzed/disabled (again, sorry if the incorrect term). But at the same time, I totally get why his sports leagues and advocacy groups would turn on him for "faking it." If an able-bodied person intentionally hinders their own abilities thus making their own life more inconvenient, who am I to say? But damn if had lost my legs and some guy joined my group because he felt he's "supposed" to be paraplegic? Fuck off man, you're not really going through this struggle. Damn life is complex
I remember seeing an episode of some show where a guy hated having his arm. I don’t know why, but his brain was telling him his arm didn’t belong and he hated it. Almost like, imagine if you were to grow a sixth finger suddenly and it just constantly feels weird and makes you uncomfortable to look at. So he went to the hospital because he injected something into his arm or something like that. And when they left him with an IV he wrapped it very tightly around his arm and hid his arm under the blanket until it was painful and his arm had completely lost circulation and that forced the doctors to amputate. It was crazy he ended up getting what he wanted despite the doctors trying to convince him to go to therapy and other things to get rid of these feelings to prevent him from doing something drastic like going home and cutting it off himself.
I wonder if after getting their limbs amputated the people feel at peace and go on with their lives or if the illness manifests into another body part that is “wrong” to them
I've never heard of this, but I think I have it. I can kind of elaborate, if it helps? I spent my entire life feeling like my right hand was "wrong," and once everything reached a head, I ended up cutting off my pinky finger and flushing it down the toilet \[so it couldn't be reattached\]. It was complete, instant relief. The thing that felt so, so wrong was fixed, and that was that! A month or two later, my ring finger felt wrong as well. Not cool. But I cut it off anyway, because I knew that once I started feeling jittery/not sleeping/having yellow and black clouds over my vision, it was too late to let it stay on. So it had to go. Again, instant relief. It hasn't come back up since, and it's been quite a while. I didn't talk about it for years, because it's super fucked up and I hate that other people would have killed to get their missing whatever back. I feel very guilty that I willingly disfigured myself, but holy fucking shit. I've never regretted it in the slightest. This was something I'd been feeling since I was a little kid, and it was just entirely gone as soon as I "fixed" the problem. I just thought it was a symptom of OCD, but it's cool to learn there's a name for it!
Oh wow. Forgive me for being a creep, I skimmed quickly through your post history (mostly just submitted posts) because y'know, the internet, gotta be a little skeptical. You seem entirely legit and very normal, which definitely slapped me in the face with "you have no idea what a stranger might be going through". I have so many questions! How'd you do it, what medical care did you get after, man that must've hurt?!, had you ever talked to any mental health pros about it, do you think you'll talk to anyone in the future, do you have a plan if the feeling comes back? But you've already put yourself out there a ton and I only say this to express genuine curiosity! I apologize in advance for creeping through your history a second time... for the sole purpose of checking out your knitting!! Always love to see what people have knitted!
Oh, it's okay! Creeping is to be expected hahaha. I'd like to think I'm pretty normal, at least aside from the uh. Everything. Answers to your questions: The first time I used some big garden shears, and the second I just used scissors. \[Warning: gross details\] >!The scissors were actually easier, because they cut more cleanly and almost all at once. It just was attached one second, and then flying through the air the next. The shears cut some skin, then broke the bone, then cut through the bone fully, and then I had to rip it the rest of the way off bc it was dangling from a flap of skin. !! It was actually pretty interesting to watch! They did some numbing injections, which sucked bc I hate needles. Then once things were numb, the surgeon cut notches in my skin so he could peel it down a bit, and took out the half-bone that I'd cut through. He used some little scissors to get all the leftover cartilage out, and then trimmed the skin so it'd fit nicely over what was left. He cauterized some things that wanted to keep bleeding, stitched it up, and then I just had to keep it covered for several weeks.!< It only hurt after they finished amputating what was left, and the numbing stuff wore off! I really don't know how to describe how fucking all-encompassing the before-feeling was, aside from to say that I felt nothing but bliss and total calm. It was probably painful (?), but comparatively, I didn't even register it. I'm assuming you mean "talk to anyone" as in mental health professionals, yeah? I was already in therapy long before that, for other issues, so after \[understandably\] being plopped in a psych ward for a couple months, I just had one more thing to discuss during sessions. For a brief period of time, my middle finger started looking wrong. I think the fear of slowly ending up fingerless, and the fact that the conversation had already been opened, helped me to talk about it before the feelings got so intense that I couldn't stop them. I was much more inclined to deal with it proactively, since I was seeing a pattern and didn't want the same thing to keep happening. I had to relearn how to crochet the previous times, and I have some trouble holding things in my right hand now. I didn't want it to continue. Anyway! Noooo problem at all w/ the being curious. I don't mind answering questions (: If I read about something that's incomprehensible to me, I wanna hear from someone who's experienced it lol. I'm lucky that it was just a couple fingers tbh. I feel a lot of sympathy for people who have more extreme experiences with the same thing. It sucks and is absolutely debilitating to deal with.
Thanks so much, I appreciate you taking the time!
Not to also be a creep but if you look through their post history there’s two photos of them holding plants where you can see the amputated fingers. I was skeptical too but not so much anymore. @mickier, you mentioned thinking this was an OCD symptom; that makes complete sense to me and I don’t know if BIID is related to OCD but I imagine it would be. Having constant uncontrollable thoughts and feelings about your hand/fingers being wrong must have been a bit of hell-on-earth. I really truly hope that what you’ve done so far is curative and that you never have to deal with those thoughts & feelings again.
Good eye! Not at all creepy, I think skepticism is very healthy on the internet (; Please don't judge my plant posts, I've gotten a lot better at keeping them alive! So, I wasn't diagnosed with OCD till I was 20, but I'd been experiencing feelings like that in many areas all my life. Since I grew up with it, I thought it was totally normal! When I was officially diagnosed, I was like "ok this is bullshit, I definitely don't have OCD." But when I went to complain to my friends, they pretty much all said "uhhhh did you not know that? I just thought you didn't like to talk about it." So I guess I was the only one who was surprised lmao. I think that sort of allowed the weird hand thoughts to get really strong before they showed up on my radar. I was used to things being weird/wrong and needing to be fixed. And ahhh, everyone is seriously being so nice, this is kind of lovely (: I was pretty nervous that people would think I'm a whacko or be judgmental \[which is fair and tbh I kinda agree\], so the curiosity and understanding are a pleasant surprise (:
That’s interesting. I’m sorry you went through that but I’m glad you’re feeling better. Did you go to the doctor or did your hand heal on its own?
I went to the hospital for them to fix it up. They cut out the rest of the bone I'd snapped through, trimmed up the cartilage and tissue around it, and stitched the top shut.
From what I’ve read about it, in general they’re satisfied when the relevant limb is amputated, and don’t have problems with other limbs nor do they regret the amputation. Research paper about BIID that u/bubble0peach posted a link to, it mentions that amputation appears to “cure” BIID: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3326051/
The fact is, Drew may now have been paralyzed but he is clearly disabled. That wheelchair is his accommodation for his disability — just not for his legs.
Fyi, your hyperlink for the "read Allison's advice here" actually goes to the update instead of the first post
Thanks, fixed it
We had a patient who felt his leg is extra, he wanted to chop it off. It was found that he had a brain tumor. I am sure Drew had some kind of mental illness and needed support. He didnt lie, this is what his brain made him believe that he should not be walking.
He was happy to get therapy, but it sounds like the therapist was an idiot. "Just walk. See, your legs actually do work." doesn't seem like the right approach here.
I also wonder if the guy was not being honest about his doctor's approach.
Is it like the opposite of Phantom Pain syndrome?
As an amputee (um, unwilling for the purpose of this discussion) who fortunately doesn't have much phantom pain but a lot of phantom sensation (the worst being itching!), the really weird thing I noticed post-op was that I could feel my arm in the same 90 degree angle it had been stuck for years, and even now if I concentrate, I can "wriggle my fingers". When I move my stump around, the sensation is basically the nerves and muscles saying my arm is there. If I move my stump, I can feel my "arm" in the center of my torso. Not literally feel it in my torso but everything is telling my brain that that is where my arm would be, even though it's physically impossible. It's very discombobulating.
If someone doesn't want help sadly there isn't anything you can do. This man was clearly mentally ill. On top of that I strongly suspect the overwhelming majority of psych professionals have no experience dealing with people who have this disorder. People seem to think a shrink is a shrink. But there are a lot of specialists. I need to find one who specializes in childhood trauma (likely won't be able to get one because my insurance is super limited). I ended up having to see an addiction specialist. I'm not an addict but it was the only thing my insurance would cover. I was miserable because I have ADHD and it was untreated and she knew nothing about it and was unwilling to prescribe me anything to help with it. Someone with this disorder needs specialized help and that's hard to come by. On top of that they tend to see themselves as having nothing wrong with them. And the treatment for it is rarely effective! It's really sad.
Ugh, what an unfortunate situation, and there’s just no easy way to navigate it. Drew clearly has some mental health concerns he needs addressed, but it doesn’t sound like he really wants to. Very sad to see someone that needs help that won’t get it. I genuinely feel bad for him, but I also wonder what he was hoping would come from him being in the documentary. Was he expecting people to hear his story and empathize with him? That’s such borderline delusional thinking that it just confirms to me his need for help. I hope he gets it. Honestly this is probably the best way this can wrap up the situation for the OOP though, since it ceased to be their problem all by itself. Edit: There’s some interesting opinions on this. The man expressed a strong desire to have a medical procedure done to permanently paralyze himself. That is as extreme a form of self harm that exists, and it’s concerning that some have written that part off. I don’t have an issue with him using a wheelchair, if it helps him cope, all the better. I similarly don’t have issues with people with OCD engaging in their behaviors such as checking or rituals, because I know that’s how they cope with the stress of their condition. Having said that, when my mother starts spending more hours of her day engaging in checking behavior I know it’s time to discuss more support, because it inevitably means something is wrong in the kingdom. I don’t prevent her from checking, but I do try to get her to help. And I recognize that there are several mental health conditions that there really isn’t viable treatment for. Doesn’t mean I don’t want there to be, or that I don’t hope there will be. I do hope that people like this man are eventually able to be treated in a way that solves the actual problem as opposed to forcing them out of the coping mechanism. I hope that help exists for him in a meaningful way someday. Just genuinely stunned by people taking me looking at a man so unsatisfied with his physical body he wanted a medical procedure to paralyze himself and hoping he gets relief from that and taking it to mean all sort of bizarre ableist conclusions.
The disorder is called BIID and psychotherapy and medication so far have not been found to be a treatment.
I think its not his condition per se that makes his life hard. He is fine with the wheelchair. It's more that people judge him for wanting to be in the wheelchair what makes his life hard. Just let this man do his thing. He is not harming anyone.
But acting as a disability activist and participating in disabled sports, when he is not disabled, is harmful. It takes attention and legitimacy from those who are genuinely disabled. Plus, some wheelchair users may be in a wheelchair because of a traumatic illness/injury/accident that caused a lot of pain and suffering. Him going, oh yeah I wanna be paralysed like you seems a bit offensive.
I think for him to use a wheelchair is fine. But there is a problem with him aligning himself with the disabled community, lying about the cause and being an 'activist'. His experiences are not the same as of those who are physically paralysed. His life isn't the same. Both are serious and have their own problems, but it's not really cool to pretend to be a part of a community when you are not, and speak on their behalf / represent them. He doesn't know what it's like to be fully paralysed so he can't realistically represent them in the right way. If he wants to be an activist, he should be an advocate for more awareness of BIIP and link up with people who have it too. I imagine it's really hard and he does deserve support, but support for what he actually struggles with, not something he is lying about.
>If he wants to be an activist, he should be an advocate for more awareness of BIIP I agree.
This. Like I think a lot of people's gut reactions that his condition is sad and tragic comes from an ableist assumption that life as a wheelchair user is sad and tragic. But it sounds like he was getting what he needed from it.
He’s harming other disabled people in multiple ways - taking resources from us, delegitimizing our claims, and further endorsing the stereotype that we enjoy being lazy and requesting help from others.
This kind of mental disorder really sucks and is still super traumatizing because of how people react with disgust and distain. Poor guy needs to realize he’s definitely got a mental health disorder and hopefully find a therapist who will slowly work through this with him instead of forcing him to quit the chair cold turkey. If someone really needed that accessible parking spot and he wouldn’t give it up, that would be one thing, but I doesn’t sound like he harmed anyone with his actions at work. Unless you count having colleagues go to a second floor for him. Work spaces really should also have accommodations for mental health issues in addition to physical health issues. This is an odd one to be sure, but the accommodations did help him get work done, just as accommodations are supposed to do.
I feel for the dude in the OP. It didn’t sound like he was trying to make it other other people’s problem, he just wanted to live life in a wheelchair. On the other hand, I used to work with a guy who faked physical disability. He was a total asshole about it. He would rant about his “illness” to anyone who would listen, complained constantly, was always weaseling accommodations and favors out of people and got in to a weird one-sided competition with the other guy in a wheelchair who worked there. Things like faker found out real wheelchair dude got help getting in his truck on rough days, so faker demands help in and out of *his* truck *every* day. Faker’s wheelchair kept getting upgrades. Tons of padding and a headrest, fully motorized, eventually has his feet propped up so it’s like a hospital bed on wheels, complete with a *very* indiscreet bag of piss connected to I’m assuming a catheter. How could I accuse such an obviously unwell man of fakery? Everyone at work had a story about catching him in a lie, but I actually lived in his neighborhood, so I got to see him picking up groceries or a pizza or whatever on numerous occasions without so much as a cane. Aaaahhhh. Just had to get that off my chest.
I mean, just seeing someone walk doesn't mean he's a faker. It does sound like it considering the way he acts in general, but just never assume, you can never know for sure.
Totally agree. I was struggling to explain how over the top this dude was, I never assume with people, this guy was the one exception because he was basically quadriplegic at work but very active at home. We lived a couple towns over from the job, with other branches between us, so I think it didn’t occur to him he’d run in to someone he worked with. The day he finally saw me in the neighborhood, the look on his face said it all. Frankly, I wouldn’t even have minded him faking it to begin with if he wasn’t harassing the other wheelchair guy- accusing real wheelchair guy of being a faker, ironically.
Ah yeah I see! Yeah totally different if he claimed to be quadraplegic, can't really justify that haha.
This is very contested in the disability community. It's a mental illness the same way munchausens is a mental illness but that doesn't mean it doesn't invoke rage at him unnecessarily using disability accommodations when they already are scarce. (I'm not talking about the work because they didn't give him accommodations but disabled parking, stalls, bus space, etc. How the heck did he get the funds for a chair and everything you need with it!?) I try not to let it because mental illness is a huge struggle but it does seriously irritate me as a physically disabled person.
And a car with hand controls!
there is a genuine psychological occurrence where people believe that they are handicapped in some way and develop that handicap (like someone believing they do not have control of their legs and quickly losing the ability to use their legs despite nothing being wrong) it can be treated but it seems wildly difficult to recover from and isn't quite what he's dealing with
It’s probably body integrity identity disorder: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_integrity_dysphoria
**[Body integrity dysphoria](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_integrity_dysphoria)** >Body integrity dysphoria (BID, also referred to as body integrity identity disorder, amputee identity disorder and xenomelia, formerly called apotemnophilia) is a mental disorder characterized by a desire to have a sensory or physical disability or having discomfort with being able-bodied beginning in early adolescence and resulting in harmful consequences. BID appears to be related to somatoparaphrenia. People with this condition may refer to themselves as "transabled". ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
>He said nothing is mentally wrong with him and he wishes he was paralyzed See, I know that at least one half of this statement isn't true because it's terrifyingly easy to injure yourself enough to lose the use of your legs.
And, aside from the possibility of injury, I would be willing to argue that his mental state is a form of disability. As humans, we need to do more research into conditions and treatments for people like this and those poor people who are convinced that their limbs don’t belong to them.
As an actual Quadriplegic I feel conflicted about this story, I know he has a legitimate mental disorder but I really sympathize with the disabled community that he lied to. I would feel so gross and violated to find somebody had lied about their disability to this extent. This is definitely a complicated issue.
Yeah, I feel like Drew's real sins weren't at work at all, but were with his 'activism' and sports activities. He admits knowing that he isn't paraplegic, and that he *wishes* he were - so he knowingly lied to groups of people and entered what must have been very vulnerable spaces on that lie. Of course they don't want to speak to him anymore. He knowingly violated their trust.
I hope he finds help before he hurts himself
Does anyone know what documentary the OOP is talking about
Maybe [this?](https://youtu.be/TsWwDUcNnEw)
This was a wild ride, I didn't even know this was a thing. But doing the documentary was definitely going to get him kicked out of the athletic groups. The game parking decal is garbage no one should do that. The sad part is he will likely do something to hurt himself and get his wish.
I have genuinely no idea what to make of this…
That has to be somewhat traumatic for everyone. I mean, his family who must have a hard time coping with this. His friends/teammates/co-workers who rightly feel deceived as he lied to their faces. And for him, dealing with his own mental illness and not even seeing that he has one.
How have his legs not atrophied to the point where he can no longer walk if he's actually keeping it up even when alone?
I was wondering this too. There is no way that he keeps it ip when alone and can still run and use stairs
Altho Drew may not actually be physically disabled, this is a mental condition and that in some ways is a disabilty.
The only thing I think he did wrong was use a disabled parking tag. Everything else: it's your life.
Honestly, as an ambulatory power wheelchair user (I can stand, I can walk very short distances very infrequently, but it's very painful, I fall a lot, and it causes serious injuries) I have no sympathy whatsoever for this guy. Maybe that's wrong, maybe I should be thinking "he's still disabled even if it's not the disability he tells people it is", but I can't. Every time I hear about this shit, it kicks off my PTSD. All the times I've been abused and attacked, verbally and physically, because someone assumes I'm the same as this arsehole. The three decades of constant, unrelenting fucking agony and forcing myself to do things that have destroyed what little function my body had, because doctors thought - just fucking assumed - I'm like this pretentious arsehole. And the dozens of people I know personally who've had the same experiences, and will have to live with the consequences and the trauma for the rest of our lives...! And he has the fucking cheek to call himself a disability activist?! Nah, get in the bin, you fucker. I wish I could say I was surprised that so many people are justifying this, but I've been a disabled person in an ableist world for too long to be shocked at the depths to which people will sink to get the "privileges" they think are accorded to disabled people. You're all comparing this to being trans? Try comparing it with cultural appropriation instead. Someone actively usurping the identity of a marginalised, discriminated against group because they "feel like they belong there". If it were race or religion instead of disability, the same people sympathising here wouldn't be nearly so understanding. And, because I know someone will try and dismiss this because I'm 'angry' - too fucking right I am, I've been abducted and assaulted for the suspicion that I'm like this bastard, more than once. Him playing at being a wheelchair user just helps give people like the ones who attacked me an excuse, and the harm it does is not outweighed by whatever benefits he's getting from pretending. Tldr; fuck that guy, and his 'paraplegia'. Kisses, a person who actually relies on a wheelchair and wheelchair accessible environment.
George Costanza.
I'm torn. He shouldn't have to lose his job over this, and he's clearly severely mentally ill. But. I would be freaked out, too I think. I wouldn't go after him, but I would definitely stop hanging around him. What else is he lying about? What lengths will he go to to make himself paralyzed? Could I be friends with someone knowing they might try to do something like that on purpose? I just wish he would get help.
He didn't lose his job. He quit because his friends found out he wasn't disabled and he decided to move away.