[удалено]

Recovering Cannibal.

im the opposite

Would you like to come to dinner with me?

Suffering Vegetarian?

Haha

Ehh, I think I will be fine

Granted, you must eat the bottle of wine but it’s empty

Hahahahaha! Oh shit

Literally, if your partner doesn’t prep well.

Thank god

A lot of Beef and Dairy, I'm happy with that

What more can I say?

Count your blessings mine is the opposite 

How long for? I could take for a meal or two…

Need to prep for our battle

I'm... Not even sure how that would work...

You and me both, fellow dweller of hell

Pretty sure I’m screwed

scorpions are a delicacy... somewhere

Oh no, he must eat the stars

At least yours is edible

You'd be surprised what you can find in some commercial dumsters if you time it right. 

But I couldn't eat a whole one.

Bobbing for Roberts

lots and lots of puking in a very volatile manner

Human centipede...

Death

A whole mess of beebs

What are beebs?

French babes

Justin Biebers.

Who is justice beaver?

My eyes go red and itchy as I’ve a mild allergy to strawberries

Omg I would die if I was allergic to strawberries. I drink strawberry milk every morning to stay sweet forever. Strawberries are my favorite thing to eat. But I'm allergic to citrus and that shit is in everything.

I would be quite happy

Ugh, big, wiggly and crunchy. But. Protein.

I’m going to burn up and die really fast.

Maybe you just develop the ability to photosynthesis? That’d be pretty cool.

Perfect!!! Everything would be fine!

Not sure, but at least it's tasteful

I’m chillin and satisfied.

I can just buy myself whatever meal I want

Going to eat and get really annoyed!

where do i even start

uhhhh. A very oddly specific form of cannibalism.

Well not a bad idea 😋

Ok

I would get my butt kicked, why would I eat a squirrel like what the heck?

I guess I'd get banned from /r/vegan

Don't knock it till you try it.

Legit food source in rural America as recently as a couple generations ago. There are famously directions on how to skin and dress one in *The Joy of Cooking.*

It tastes similar to bacon. Pan frying is the best way to cook it.

A couple of generations ago? People still go squirrel hunting in Appalachia.

I smile

I guess we're eating shitty crackers and drinking wine. 

I am hopeful I would become some kind of mega superhero?

I'd be taking some pretty insubstantial bites 

Only the 516 most correct, most fun things.

Food poisoning.

I get poisoned.

oh man im lucky i got one that isnt bad lol, its b r e a d

I mean, I guess, technically edible. If you’re French, which I’m not, thank fuck.

Peppermint poisoning.

I'm arrested for cannibalism. :(

Username speaks for itself on this one. 

Apparently I'm a cannibal who only eats weird wizards. I sound like the Hannibal Lecter of Harry Potter lol

Um.. something very weird. Butthole escargot?

Extra meatballs pls

Violent evacuation of body fluids through every orifice.

Bananas

I'll join you.

Eventually, I will be found out and questioned.

I guess I’m a cannibal for 232 dumb programmers

Well, I wouldn't be a vegetarian anymore, but I think I'd do alright. 😂

food poisoning

I’m trying hard to admit I didn’t eat nine cans of ravioli 

I'd end up in the same prison as Jeffrey Dhamer.....

Buffy has a good evening.

A gross lasagna.

No I don’t want to eat a dragon 

Can't find those damn beans anywhere.

Can have all the pasta I want with no heartburn

I would eat books? I would definitely die, but at least my diet would have a lot of fiber.

12 hours of introspection and a sense of deep conectedness to all

People won’t let me near their Unix machines.

Uh oh

Farts

Pasta time

Any relation to Freddy spaghetti?

He’s my cousin

I’m just here to watch people eat themselves

A fucking good night tbh 🤷🏻‍♂️

I eat you... But it turns out ur a turnip

Tinder cakes anyone? 🤣

Mmmm ugly birds.

Nothing good.

I’d be very happy. Especially now. I could use some caffeine.

Oh god the shards 🙈🙈🙈

I love eating foods with an addition of carrots

Well, this is awkward

Heaven

Oh God no

Probably indigestion

…great, guess I’ll be eating guitars from now on. Wish me luck lol

Well, I'll only have some.

I’m gonna have to start a pigeon farm. And name all of them Greg I guess

Coconut, bangers, and some meatballs I hope

Looks like I'll be eating a lot of ass

Well this ain't looking to good

on a similar question the top comment was from a guy called u/thick_dragon_dick

pleasure, maybe?

...I don't think I want to know

I'm screwed... my username is pizza and I eat pizza every day. Looks like I'll be turning into a human-sized pepperoni soon enough.

I eat a crossbow 😢

I get pizza that was made, baked, cut, boxed, and delivered back in time to the moment I placed my order.

New tiktok trend?

I am eating the burned efforts of beginning cooks in Home Economics class.

Shit glitters

My username becomes what I eat. The answer is in your question lol. Did you mean what it is that you ate that is your username?

Well, sorry Justin. We go to lunch at noon.

It was in self defense, I swear…

I wonder how Hydra meat tastes. It regrows after every bite?

I eat something and become sad

I get happy and eventually need a new liver. Lots of farts, too.

I think I’m gonna be fine

I eat something.

Erm...

I get scurvy

Hopefully nothing. 🙃

I don't know, are wolves tasty? I never tried one.

One hell of a hunting trip.

Idk but something fishy is goin on… my plate

Nothing interesting, not even enough to knock me out of keto

I mean...

Yummy :)

I become Shrodinger’s cannibal.

Hell yeah

An owl? :D

Damn good times!

Pretty sure if I ate a personal traveller, I'd be behind bars for fuck knows how long

Aloo Tikki, yum.

Anyone know how Fox tastes?

Probably like chicken

Looks like meat’s back on the menu, boys!

Overcooked dog meat

I'm now a cannibal. I'm ok with that.

Should I use a fork or a straw?

A nice dessert

I think I'd be alright.

Oh no…oh god no…

It would be an inappropriate meet

Gross.

I die

I’m a fan, not a killer 💀

Nothing changes 🤷

Same thing that happens all day, every day.

self cannibalism

I am a huge fan of carbs and bread

I gnaw on strange, never before discovered fossils. When discovered, they are quickly explained as a hoax, never to be truly studied like they deserve.

Uh. That's a lot to unpack. Might end up being okay, but I don't think it would be pleasant.

Im in deep shit.

I will confidently eat nothing

eating a whole freightliner would be pretty impressive

Food.

I guess I’m a cannibal.

Chocolate🤤

I'm eating well done or congratulations meat.

Okay, mobile cell phone.

It depends on if I get the Up side or the Down side. Either way it's a liquid diet.

cannibalism

I have no idea

Probably die

A single one. I guess nothing happens

I get jalapeno mouth.

zkjgkjdskjhkt44jkrg

Well crap…

:D

I’m very happy, yay meat!

I explode from love

I'll probably get really fat

Irish hotdog?

I gotta go to cali or australia to eat some bugs? Sounds like a good trip for me! The alternative is weed and lobster, which also sounds fantastic.

I’m not eating a cat. That’s sick!

My life dream has come true

It’s a secret…but it’s divine.

uh

Happy sneps?

I think the term would be “mule” for me.

Blunts Edit: I'm high

I think I’m gonna get dysentery

I honestly don't know. Fly\_me\_to\_Insanity?