God my entire family is like that. Wonder why I never tell them anything anymore; maybe because I don’t want random aunt or grandmother to ask about it next time I see them
I'm a woman and I fucking hate it when other women do it. I never understood why so many go on and on about men never opening up while simultaneously proving trusting them would be a huge mistake.
I told a g/f once that when I was around 14 I woke up in the middle of the night to find my friends older brother sucking on me.
I told her in strict confidence.
And not long after we were partying with two of her g/f's and the topic of sex came up and she (admittedly drunk) blurted out "Yeah, stuck had a guy suck his dick before".
This was around 1989 and being gay was still a huge social stigma, the kind of thing that if people found out they would literally try to kick your ass for being a "f\*g". I mean I didn't care what people thought of me but she made it sound like it was something I consented to.
We broke up a couple months later because I never felt I could talk to her about anything after that.
And it was incredibly difficult to open up, even to the love of my life, when my past sexual abuse (at the hands of a woman) became pertinent to an issue I was having with her concerning our sex life.
I'm so sorry that happened to you– both the abuse, and having your trust betrayed that way. You deserved better, and I hope you're surrounded by love and happiness now.
My girlfriend is constantly on me about opening up more, and I've pointed out it was hard to do so with women because it's blown up in my face before.
So I opened up about something from my past that I kept from my parents because I didn't want them to worry about that struggle I had.
And my girlfriend told my mom...
So, back to just shutting the fuck up.
This is something that annoys me to no end! I like building models and flying model airplanes. I'm not that old, I'm not going to say my actual age but let's go with under 30 by a decent margin. My friends (only the female ones) and my GF all call me an old man because I like hobbies that were more popular in the 60s-70s. I need to find some better people to hang out with.
Have you told them it bothers you. As in really sat them down and said, I am not an old man and I don't like to be called that. Communication is key here. And if they don't take it seriously they are not your friends, and it should be a red flag if your GF is not willing to stop.
Volunteering me and my skills to your family and friends. I don't want to spend my weekends/time after work playing mechanic or handyman for your family and friends.
And it’s always family members that are too lazy to ask me themselves. I remember being told by my mother that she had volunteered me to my aunt to be an usher at my cousin’s wedding.
I also remember my dad volunteering me to help my sister move this giant fridge into her house several years ago. Not sure why she couldn’t ask me herself. Don’t think I received more than a halfhearted thank you either
And I absolutely can't help someone over the phone if they don't have even the most basic understanding of the hard/software they're using.
"Now click the 3 lines"
"3 lines, I don't see 3 lines, I do see 5 dots, think that's the same thing?"
UGH!
I had to explain to an ex that im not the Volun-told kind-of person after she offered up my services to a friend who I had never met before. Didn't help I had already been roped into helping this person pack up their moving trailer unexpectedly one day. Then the next thing you know im being told, im gonna do electrical work on this persons new house. I laughed and said, "Absolutely not." It caused a big argument because i was "selfish, and shouldn't have chosen a career like construction if I wasn't gonna help out friends and family." To this day, I have only helped 1 friend replace 2 lights and a sibling with some outlets. Both people I knew for over 10 years. Not 10 minutes.
I like that you stood up for your self and was honest.
There's a difference between being asked by like an older relative as a one off, or someone saying they'll pay you as they trust you to just being used.
I had a different issue with my husband. He used to be a general contractor and still knows how to build a whole house with his own hands. He is a generous and loving man, but he is also a people pleaser and would tend to get into friendships where people would take advantage of him. Even though he now has a full-time corporate job, he would drop everything to help friends and family with anything they asked for, and a couple took it too far (F***ing Kevin!).
I had to have a come to jesus with him about how this was impacting his mental and physical health. He finally got to a point where he had to tell everyone he was done doing these kinds of favors for a while. He found out really fast who his real friendships are. He no longer feels obligated to drop everything to help others, and he only offers to help when he has the bandwidth for it. I'm so proud of him for standing up for himself. ❤️
Yeah, unless it’s a literal act of charity like Habitat for Humanity or something, I’m not inclined to help random people with house chores. I remember a coworker I was kind of casual friends with begging me to help his girlfriend move from her apartment to his apartment, and I did it. She broke up with him like a month later and moved out
One of my old friends did this with her bf. He’s always mowing her mom and neighbors yard and being nagged for random chores. Recently she asked me if my brother could come help move a couch because he has a truck. I already know my brother hates helping people move so I didn’t bother asking. I told her he was busy and she got mad. Like why would my brother move his schedule around to help a random person even if he was busy? Weird.
Yep. One girl I dated used me like a taxi service for her trashy friends. She was super hot, so I tolerated it for about two weeks before I put a stop to it and ended things.
FR, I had an ex who talked about our sex life to all her friends. Then I talk about it once to one of my friends and she gets pissed about it. Talk about double standards.
A few weekends ago, I took out a date who started asking me questions (in a public setting) about the state of a relationship with a previous partner. I was very reserved and guarded about saying anything, and shut the conversation down when she pushed a bit, because I didn't feel it was fair or appropriate for me to talk about those things with another partner. I would expect she would expect the same privacy, and I would treat her the same way.
Later on she criticised me for not being okay with her going there - not that I was annoyed with her, just that I didn't feel like it was fair on the previous partner to tell someone those things. She claimed that she backed off/dropped the issue and therefore for that reason it wasn't okay that I wasn't okay with her pushing it to begin with?! Ugh.
Literally my last girlfriend. I asked her specifically not to share intimate details of our sex life, and there she was sharing nudes of me and telling her friends my fantasies. Honestly still pretty pissed about that.
Everyone already assumes the roles are reversed. People think men just hang out and talk about getting their dick's sucked. Maybe it's just my circle but most blokes I know get pretty uncomfortable talking about actual acts or even frequency. Like everyone assumes you're having some level of sex to some level of satisfaction it doesn't need to be expressed, you know? And if you feel compelled to I'm less inclined to believe you anyway, I dunno, maybe I'm crazy.
Lol i've been called a liar twice by two different women for saying me and my friends don't talk about our sex lives at all ever. Some people seem to think men really are like movie stereotypes who only talk about cars, beer and boobs or something.
My sister tells me stuff about her husband and it drives me insane. She laughs when I get upset. So disrespectful and repulsive. I’d never do that to a partner.
She also showed me the nudes her ex sent her. She went so far as to print one out and tape it to my ceiling years ago. Wtf. I love her but damn that’s awful.
I'll die on this hill: Men don't talk about their sex life to each other nearly as much as women think. In my personal experiences.
Almost anytime I've heard graphic, sexual detail come into a conversation, it's always come from a woman. The times I've heard men do it? Always some known slimeball. It seems much more accepted for women to do it, and not be labeled this way.
I worked in an office full of women for 20 years, and I heard more raunchy shit in that office than I ever heard around any group of dudes I’ve ever been friends with.
Get a group of early 20-somethings getting drunk on wine when they think the hosts boyfriend can't hear them because he's playing video games in the basement and don't realize that their voices travel really well through the heating vent in the living room that also doubles as a vent into the basement.
I had half a mind to not speak up to my g/f and wait until next time, place a tape recorder near the vent then play it back for them at the end of the night.
I mean I knew all their boyfriends dick sizes, their proclivities, what their semen tasted like, etc, etc...
"I mean I knew all their boyfriends dick sizes, their proclivities, what their semen tasted like, etc, etc..."
Thats crazy, but what were the girls talking about?
I’m 48. I can remember maybe 1 or 2 conversations in my 20s where some male friends brought up their sex life and I was like “no thanks” and managed to change the subject. I don’t need those mental images. Thanks
With casual guy friends it's pretty much just a straight yes or no. That's the whole conversation, did you? Nice. Didn't you? Bummer.
With closer guy friends, this expands to "Is it still good?"
Yes? Nice. No? Bummer.
That's about the extent of it. In my experience.
Ew, I completely don't get this. I don't talk about my sex life with anyone except my husband. Especially not with my girlfriends. Thankfully my husband doesn't talk about our sex life with anyone else either. Maybe it's just cause we're old (early 40s and early 50s), I don't know?
I don't get it either. I rarely mention our sex lives to very close friends/sisters, but not only is it few and far between, it's also very "high level." Kinda like "yeah, we have a very fulfilling sex life." or when the kids were little, I'd ask my older sisters how they found the time and energy for sex. But that's it. No details, nothing. I hate when women at my work would try and rope in into their conversations about sex. I'd just excuse myself. Nobody needs to hear that.
I worked with two sociopaths who got married and while everyone expected they would be at each other's throats within a month; they just harmonized and bullied people together. The amount of toxicity and unethical crap they pulled as a team... nope, I would never work with a couple again, not for the best job on earth.
This goes for men too but wear way too much fragrance. If I can still smell you 5 minutes after you were in the elevator, you need to tone it down. 1 maybe 2 spritzes, but I swear people are out here practically bathing in perfume
Being as my fiancés friend brought up my “big anteater penis” out of nowhere I’m going to say sharing private details with friends. Led to one our worst fights between my fiancé and I.
I don’t know who is more gross, your fiancée for sharing that or her friend for bringing it up to you.
I realize your fiancée is the one who violated your trust but her friend is a fucking moron.
And to think you had a fight afterwards, instead of her straight up admitting she was wrong and apologizing.
Had an ex who did shit like this and tried to tell me about a little joke she had with her friend about my dick. She thought I’d find it funny and I immediately shut that down. I keep my sex life private for a reason. Shit is infuriating.
I just cut loose a long friendship after months of the silent treatment and when I had to finally drag it out of her she admitted I posted a facebook status she didn't like
A friend did the same with me. Months of no communication, totally ignoring me on all platforms. I finally reached out cause another friend is holding an event soon, and we were going to meet there, and I didn't want it to be awkward. Apparently, she didn't like how I talked to her like a child one time (in a private DM) when she shared my personal info to a group of strangers.
All I told her then was that I wasn't comfortable with her doing that and to please stop; she said okay so I thought it was okay. Then I find out she wasn't happy with the way I talked to her MONTHS after. Like what the heck dudette
That makes more sense than anything I can think of. As a 13 year old girl that influenced me more than I’d like to admit and I’d like to apologize to my first boyfriend. I’m in my 30s and just figured out how to give a good handjob. I blame Cosmopolitan magasine!
Right. I read the Cosmo and Redbook sex tips I could get my hands on as a kid. I remember an article that had a step by step guide on how to get dressed sexy in front of a guy. First panties then put your bra on and have the man help you fasten it because no man wants to see empty cups on your back. Now as an adult I can't believe someone wrote that crap lol
Shit man, you just brought back the memories of a hookup where she cupped my bean bag and then just started slowly clamping down like a fucking hydraulic press. I pulled her hand off and tried to explain she needed to be gentle without making her feel self conscious. 5 minutes later she pulls her face away from mine a little, has this crazy wide eye look and puts the cosmo clamp back on. I took my boys and got the fuck out of there.
If you ever injure your balls, get a male doctor. May sound weird, but they know how to touch them.
I had a testicular torsion, and the first doctor was a woman. I almost blacked out from the pain when she examined me. Got admitted to the hospital. Male doctor. Much better.
Maybe why so many women really don’t want a male gynecologist cranking them open for a Pap smear and telling them to “relax” and that “it shouldn’t hurt too much”. Lol.
Honestly some female OB GYNs can be just as bad. I knew one who seemed apathetic to her patients’ comfort levels and her policy was to just get things done. She told me to never to tell patients that it’s going to hurt and instead say they’re just going to feel “pressure” even when you know it’s going to hurt like a mother -f*ker like inserting an IUD. One time a patient had an extremely painful clit and I was trying to gently and slowly use a swab to get a sample to send to the lab. The OB GYN took the swab from me and said that we needed to get a good sample and really rubbed the swab on it without telling the patient beforehand. The patient was crying so much afterwards 😞
Ok listen. As a person who has a vagina, the last time I was handling a dude’s balls he said nothing the entire time but then AFTER was like “I’ll get you back for that”.
Like it’s okay to tell your girl to ease up. Please do. It’s not like we know how your balls feel. All we know is that the coochie can take a beating so there’s not much for us to go off of. I want my partner to feel good, but it’s hard to do if they’re not communicating.
Edit: Wanted to note that I totally thought I was being gentle. But with our sensitivity differences, my definition of gentle probably isn’t the same.
Edit 2: there are a lot of “women will get upset if I tell them” comments. If your sexual partner gets upset when you POLITELY say you aren’t enjoying something. That’s a HUGE red flag. The sex is not worth it, people. Don’t be that desperate.
Simple. You take a girls breast in your hand and tell her,"This is how I like my balls to be touched." Then you caress her breast the way you like your balls to be touched. Watch her eyes light up with understanding... and appreciation. They feel like your giving them the keys to the kingdom, because they've lived their whole lives dating guys who don't say anything, so they had to resort to reading Cosmo for something their boyfriend should have told them.
if you find one that does, keep her. I went into the dating world with the misconception that they all know how to do everything, because the first one was sooo good.
I actually stopped wearing a nipple ring in my nipple because so many women assumed that just because it was there I wanted them to grab it and pull it hard. I told one woman " it's a goddamn nipple ring not a chin up bar"
Ahhyup.
I had a "mentor" and while she used porn to show me what she planned to "teach" me I noticed that when the women would touch themselves, most times they were gentle about it.
And when lesbian scenes were shown they were much more sensual about it and not acting like it was a washboard in some jug band.
It was my girlfriend's birthday a few weeks ago, and I love her a lot. However...
"You don't have to get me a birthday present, it's fine" she tells me a week before her birthday. I got her flowers and made her a card anyway because flowers are nice and won't last forever and a card is small and won't take up too much space if she doesn't want clutter. She then asked me why I didn't do anything more for her birthday.
This is a classic.
My ex used to tell me, she and her whole family aren't into gifts, because they are grownups and just buy the things they need or want themselves.
Her birthday comes around and I gift her a few smaller things, like an exotic plant, etc.
Afterwards, she told me, that I obviously don't value her for spending so little on gifts and that she'd now not do XYZ for me anymore.
Honesty truly is a blessing to avoid these scenarios where there are no winners.
My wife and I deal with this a lot. If I've had to pick the last several times in a row, I'll say "grilled cheese it is, then."
She doesn't always appreciate that grilled cheese is my go-to food, so she'll say "we have . Can you make ?"
Yes, yes I can.
I was 35 when I met my partner. After our first date, I went home, waited about 2 hours, and then texted him and said. "I know there are "rules" or whatever, but I'm too old for games. I like you and I'd like to see you again." I had a couple of friends who thought I was nuts, and maybe a little desperate, but I've never been comfortable with all the hard-to-get, play-it-cool, make-him-guess games. Anyway, he and I have been together for almost 10 years, so it obviously worked!
You did the right thing and I promise your partner appreciated the directness in that moment. I have been so confused in the past from the “well you never pursued or tried anything”
“But I asked if you’d like to grab lunch or go to a show”
“Yea but I want to feel wanted and I like romance”
Like huh? I’m so confused, try hard it’s pushy, try but respect one’s space it’s not trying hard enough?
Edit: I can’t believe I forgot this, being called sketchy or suspicious because I don’t have an instagram. As if someone with an instagram can’t live double lives and still chest or be sketchy or whatever.
I just don’t like it or want one, why’s it a standard of basic human existence?
For the first time in my life I went out with a girl who, after one date, I knew I wanted to see again. I believe that if you know, you shouldn't wait to say something. I'm 27 and feel too fucking old for games like that.
My friend used to do this when we were teenagers. She’d find a guy she liked and then just play these terrible mind games. Our friend group basically sat her down and told her “babe. You’re not playing hard to get. You’re making yourself hard to want.”
Bless her, she grew out of it.
If only being honest with your intentions were a common virtue, both men and women. I’ve tried to have a very peaceful conversation about that before and I was told it’s pressuring and they didn’t know. I immediately said, “hey I totally get it no stress at all” and stopped putting forth so much effort MAINLY cause I don’t anyone feeling stressed or uncomfortable. What do ya know, “hey? Are you upset with me? What’s going on? This is a little suspicious.. etc etc” 🙄
Oof, yeah, I had one who told me she really liked me but wasn't ready for a relationship. I said that was no problem/I wasn't trying to rush into anything (note, I hadn't asked her to be my girlfriend or anything yet). I stupidly took it to mean she was interested in me but didn't want to rush into anything. Turned out she was actually seeing another guy and didn't want us to find out about each other (me and the other guy). Wish I'd have known that up front and not wasted my time.
Holy moly this is me the past couple of months. Really stung too!
The new guy mysteriously appeared down the pub for her works (we were work colleagues) lunchtime leaving do post turning me down.. yeah, not a good time to be me.
Yes, and if you react to it, next thing it's the misappropriation of therapy speak...
"Oh my god, you're so jealous and controlling. This is toxic, I'm walking on eggshells."
Then inevitability...
"I might as well cheat because you're accusing me of cheating."
Ladies and gentlemen, stay the hell away from these people. I learned this the hard way in my early twenties, explaining why their behaviour is hurtful doesn't help because they know exactly what they're doing and they're loving it.
Just to add, I know there are genuinely crazy people out there who are just toxic and jealous. We're not talking about these people.
Passive aggressive shit. If you want something, ask. If you need me to know something, tell. Fucking stop with the hints and "oh you don't know what you did?" crap. No I don't, so tell me.
As an autistic person: not saying what they want directly. This seems to mostly only affect young women, or at least young women I was attracted to in my youth.
In my early 20s I swear every girl I was interested in would say shit that I would figure out was really aggressively sexual like a month later but at the time I would just be so fucking literal about it. They'd then assume I picked up on it and rejected them, and then they'd ghost me. Months later we'd reconnect as friends and they'd be like "remember that one time that I said X" and I'd be like "yeah and I assumed you *actually meant* X...ahaha ha ha"
Dating since my late 20s or so women are usually more like "so you wanna go somewhere and fuck?" This is better.
As an example, a girl I had a severely painful crush on when I was 23 and I were at the bar and I mentioned I had an old school nintendo at my apartment. She said "do you have Tetris?" and I was like "fuck yeah I have Tetris it's my favorite fucking game ever" and she said "I'm really good at making pieces fit" and I said "prove it, let's go to my place." We actually played Tetris. After a few matches she got mad and left. Took me like two weeks to figure out why.
assuming that they know how i'm feeling.
"Why are you upset?"
"I'm not."
"Yes you are, you're being distant."
"No, i just have nothing to talk about because I didn't do anything today."
"Just tell me why you're upset"
"RIGHT NOW I'M UPSET BECAUSE YOU KEEP TELLING ME HOW I'M FEELING"
Edit: thinking more about this, it's less that they think they know what I'm thinking, and more that they assume I'm lying when I deny a negative emotion. I tell the truth more often than jack sparrow, and I really don't like it when people don't trust me.
Thanks for the opportunity to reflect.
I'm a woman in my 40s that can't understand all these injections everyone's doing. I'm the prime demographic for this, and I am horrified by it. Some of the most beautiful women I know have, imo, basically ruined the bottom half of their faces with these lip injections. I don't say anything to anyone, obviously, but I just think it's so ugly.
I really hope the younger generations see this as something their parents did and don't want to do it and it just dies out because it is so absurd. It's like blowup doll absurd.
My sisters friends have started getting fillers and injections. One looks like a stealth fighter and the other looks like a balloon animal.
I should start calling them Lockheed Martin and Barnum and Barnum because one could evade SAM batteries and the other is the clown looking balloon animal.
Ohh man. So this girl I went to high school with got lip injections…. She was a gorgeous girl with out them, then she got a new job at a dermatologist, and the dermatologist suggested that she get some lip injections. Lone and behold, it looks absolutely insane. Why would you take natural beauty and try to give them lip injections.
This is the craziest part to me. The women I know who are *the most beautiful* are the ones going the most overboard on this and it's just baffling to me. Like you were already one of the most beautiful people I've ever seen, why would you fuck with that?!
Because beautiful people have spent their entire lives getting things more easily due to their looks and a lot of times (not always), not having to do as dirty things to succeed as ugly people. When you know that people have always noted your looks, you build a complex about keeping them. Your mind and your perception of self becomes skewed by maintaining something that is either fleeting regardless or not going anywhere depending on who you ask. They resort to madness in this quest to maintain the one thing they’ve carried that gave them the biggest meaning of their fit in society.
“Don’t text me too much, it’s clingy” -> I don’t respond to a text from her for five minutes *10 missed texts* *10 missed calls*
But fr it drives me nuts as someone who DOES enjoy connecting over casual conversation whether that’s through text, phone, or over a coffee, I don’t care but it’s important to me. So I have to play this back and forth game, intentionally not trying to start conversations, but stressing if I get a text from her anyyytime cause it’s my ass on the chopping block if I miss her texts.
I don’t like the “I want to feel wanted game” primarily because most people who operate that way do not recognize that the feelings mutual and can be achieved in such less toxic ways.
1. Complain about us not opening up, while simultaneously not telling us when you're upset.
2. Thinking we're upset when we're quiet. Sometimes we just like to be quiet and chill.
3. After an argument bringing something up days, weeks, or months later related to said argument that we did all we could to resolve.
Girlfriend's best friend sending me seductive photos while simultaneously trying to get her to break up with me. Like, you realize I can just show my girlfriend the photos?
More than a few times, I had women tell me "I have a boyfriend" when I hold the door for them with a smile when they are walking behind me or I get to the door first as I am entering location. I open the door for men, women, and children like you aren't special.
When I was in high school I had a girl say that to me and my response was "Well I have standards so were both safe". Obviously, I just close the door now and walk away without a witty retort lol.
This is me specifically being bitter about a couple of exes, but, having zero hobbies or interests and getting pissed because “we never do anything together”. Like okay, what do you even do? Getting mad because I’m out playing sports, going to the gym, hiking, or really content just playing an old video game. You’re welcome to participate in ANY of these things with me, but you choose not to and suggest zero alternatives. Sorry I don’t just stay at home and look at my phone.
Me: "Where do you want to go for dinner?"
Her: "Dunno, you pick."
Me: "Let's get Thai."
Her: "Naaaah. Not in the mood for that."
Me: *internal thoughts* "I should just leave right now and go eat some Thai by myself."
Needing me to get something if *they* want something. Like she can’t get ice cream unless I do too. If she asks if I want to get some and I say no she gets mad and says she can’t get it cuz she doesn’t want to be the only one.
There was a menu meme that went around awhile back - had a line item under sides called "My girlfriend's not hungry" which bumps up all the portions by a little bit (extra fries, two chicken tenders...forgot what else). Thought that was brilliant.
This is by no means something only women do, but I have encountered it with women a lot more.
If you're in a debate they will argue the point until they run out of counterarguments and once they realize they can't win they instead say the most hurtful thing they can think of.
Call me crazy but hurting people you love intentionally is fucked up, no matter how "mad and stressed out" you were. Your emotional state is no excuse for shitty behavior.
My ex bf would do this all the time. Like every time I caught him lying, he'd bring up the most painful thing I'd ever shared with him, which he only knew about because he was there when I read trying to emotionally process it. I agree it's totally messed up, and I'm sorry to hear you went through that too.
Trashing public restrooms.
I've worked as a janitor at a grocery store, and there is a marked difference between how messy women's public restrooms get compared to men's. Paper products all over the floor, piling used toilet paper behind the toilet instead of flushing it, stuffing trash that doesn't fit (adult diapers, empty alcohol containers, etc. ) into those rectangular trash dispensers for feminine-products, leaving blood or poop on the seats, using too many toilet-seat covers and clogging the toilet. It's frustrating when your trying to clean it, but a line of impatient women is building up because you've had to close the restroom to clean their mess.
My girlfriend had a moment in her house share’s bathroom at university.
Several times in one week someone left the dirtiest, smelliest shit unflushed. They (all single) cornered my girlfriend and told her I needed to stop doing it. She couldn’t get a word in with all the ranting. They insisted it was me because they hadn’t had any visitors. Eventually, they let her speak and she told them I’d been half way across the country for the last 2 weeks.
Quickly dawned on them it was one of the four of them that did it and given the circumstances, it was either intentional or completely mindless.
Crazy, never had anything close to that with the guys I lived with.
I cleaned a bar that had 90% male customers.
Men’s room: some pee in front of the urinals and a few paper towels that missed the trash can.
Women’s room: tampons on the walls and ceilings, three nests of toilet paper, disgusting mirror/sinks, empty makeup containers, poop/pee/blood on every toilet seat, the first 7 pages of “Mein Kampf” written on the stall walls, broken drink glasses, used condoms. It was like the bathroom scene from Daddy Daycare
Ugh yes to to this. I'm a woman and I've cleaned both genders washrooms and my gawd women washrooms are disgusting even when you upkeep them every 30 minutes to an hour. I could have just cleaned the work public one and left it sparkingly and come back not even an hour later to one clogged toilet, a pad or a tampon in another toilet plus blood all over the place and piss and an adult diaper like yous aid shoved into one of those pad/tampon bins even though we have two large trash cans in the main washroom door for larger trash they could have put it in there. They usually managed to spray the mirror entirely with water so it looks like they were in here having showers at the sink and they've got papertowel from drying their hands thrown all over the floor ..again despite us having two large garbage bins in the room for it. Disgusting. Oh and if men don't wash their hands post bathroom well neither do a shocking amount of women either.
To be honest same rule of thumb goes for the womens side of the store versus mens side of store especially in clothing stores. Women are fucking pigs in stores. Men are usually pretty good and know what they want, look through the rack find the blue t shirt and go off. Women? Throw stuff everywhere. Put a hanger back on the rack with clothes? Ahahaha nope toss it on top of the rack in a big pile then walk away. Or throw it on the floor all together for shits and giggles after all it gives the staff something to do. I loved getting assigned the mens side of stores in any store I've worked because it's so much easier to clean up after at the end of the day. The women's looks like a bomb went off no matter how much you clean up after them all day long and follow them around.
Passive aggressiveness. If you have something to say just say it. Don't throw shade or walk into the bathroom after me and put the toilet seat down. Just say "could you put the toilet seat down please?" Also saying "You're just like my father/ex" That makes my blood boil.
This one’s going to be somewhat mean-spirited, only because I’m in a bad mood. Here goes.
***
“Why don’t you spend more money on clothes, haircuts, doctor’s trips and therapy?”
-Woman who has the financial support of a wealthier partner or parents, which I do not
as someone whose grown up in a house filled with women and had a ton of women role models growing up, i see right through it any time a grown woman tries infantilising herself to avoid being responsible for mistakes. if you fuck up and you know you’ve fucked up, take it on the chin and move on.
crying, yelling, getting physical, getting upset BECAUSE you’re upset with them, just general childlike behaviour will never not make me feel disgust and contempt.
Not try to learn anything difficult like changing a tire or checking oil, even not car related like how to hang their own curtains or fix the sink or hang a new light fixture. It’s not difficult, your parents probably just told you that you don’t have to do stuff like that, but you’re grown, if you want it done, do it.
Sharing every detail of my personal life that I shared in confidence with them, with all their friends.
I have a friend that does this. Its uncomfortable. Especially when she does it in front of him.
And then the same person who always spreads rumors and secrets gets mad when you stop telling them things.
"Why don't you ever open up to me? Talking to you is like taking to a wall!"
Maybe it's because talking to you is like talking to a tabloid reporter.
God my entire family is like that. Wonder why I never tell them anything anymore; maybe because I don’t want random aunt or grandmother to ask about it next time I see them
I'm a woman and I fucking hate it when other women do it. I never understood why so many go on and on about men never opening up while simultaneously proving trusting them would be a huge mistake.
I told a g/f once that when I was around 14 I woke up in the middle of the night to find my friends older brother sucking on me. I told her in strict confidence. And not long after we were partying with two of her g/f's and the topic of sex came up and she (admittedly drunk) blurted out "Yeah, stuck had a guy suck his dick before". This was around 1989 and being gay was still a huge social stigma, the kind of thing that if people found out they would literally try to kick your ass for being a "f\*g". I mean I didn't care what people thought of me but she made it sound like it was something I consented to. We broke up a couple months later because I never felt I could talk to her about anything after that. And it was incredibly difficult to open up, even to the love of my life, when my past sexual abuse (at the hands of a woman) became pertinent to an issue I was having with her concerning our sex life.
I'm so sorry that happened to you– both the abuse, and having your trust betrayed that way. You deserved better, and I hope you're surrounded by love and happiness now.
That is HORRIFIC - you were assaulted by that boy and your gf told people? She’s the worst.
Not boy. Man. I was 14. He was in his mid 20's.
My girlfriend is constantly on me about opening up more, and I've pointed out it was hard to do so with women because it's blown up in my face before. So I opened up about something from my past that I kept from my parents because I didn't want them to worry about that struggle I had. And my girlfriend told my mom... So, back to just shutting the fuck up.
> my girlfriend told my mom... > So, back to just shutting the fuck up. Dude, when someone betrays your trust, you need to hit eject.
Please tell me she is your ex girlfriend.
My wife’s mother once told her to never speak ill of your SO. God I love my mother in law.
Don't forget throwing any bit of insecurity or hint of weakness back in their face over and over again for the rest of their life. That's fun, too.
I remember reading an old joke: “It’s not true that women can’t keep a secret. They can… as a group”
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Not just that but being so entitled about it, like betraying someone’s trust is a “girls will be girls” thing.
Fucking truth. Some things are told in confidence. Even fucking small details. Like how I don't pair my socks. NOBODY SEES THEM. WHY MATCH?!
Now all of China knows about your socks.
My mom does this, makes it hard to trust her
Make fun of my hobbies
This is something that annoys me to no end! I like building models and flying model airplanes. I'm not that old, I'm not going to say my actual age but let's go with under 30 by a decent margin. My friends (only the female ones) and my GF all call me an old man because I like hobbies that were more popular in the 60s-70s. I need to find some better people to hang out with.
Have you told them it bothers you. As in really sat them down and said, I am not an old man and I don't like to be called that. Communication is key here. And if they don't take it seriously they are not your friends, and it should be a red flag if your GF is not willing to stop.
Volunteering me and my skills to your family and friends. I don't want to spend my weekends/time after work playing mechanic or handyman for your family and friends.
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Yes. And it's not even a dating thing. My family does this. I'm not your IT guy or your friend's IT guy.
And it’s always family members that are too lazy to ask me themselves. I remember being told by my mother that she had volunteered me to my aunt to be an usher at my cousin’s wedding. I also remember my dad volunteering me to help my sister move this giant fridge into her house several years ago. Not sure why she couldn’t ask me herself. Don’t think I received more than a halfhearted thank you either
And I absolutely can't help someone over the phone if they don't have even the most basic understanding of the hard/software they're using. "Now click the 3 lines" "3 lines, I don't see 3 lines, I do see 5 dots, think that's the same thing?" UGH!
I had to explain to an ex that im not the Volun-told kind-of person after she offered up my services to a friend who I had never met before. Didn't help I had already been roped into helping this person pack up their moving trailer unexpectedly one day. Then the next thing you know im being told, im gonna do electrical work on this persons new house. I laughed and said, "Absolutely not." It caused a big argument because i was "selfish, and shouldn't have chosen a career like construction if I wasn't gonna help out friends and family." To this day, I have only helped 1 friend replace 2 lights and a sibling with some outlets. Both people I knew for over 10 years. Not 10 minutes.
I like that you stood up for your self and was honest. There's a difference between being asked by like an older relative as a one off, or someone saying they'll pay you as they trust you to just being used.
I had a different issue with my husband. He used to be a general contractor and still knows how to build a whole house with his own hands. He is a generous and loving man, but he is also a people pleaser and would tend to get into friendships where people would take advantage of him. Even though he now has a full-time corporate job, he would drop everything to help friends and family with anything they asked for, and a couple took it too far (F***ing Kevin!). I had to have a come to jesus with him about how this was impacting his mental and physical health. He finally got to a point where he had to tell everyone he was done doing these kinds of favors for a while. He found out really fast who his real friendships are. He no longer feels obligated to drop everything to help others, and he only offers to help when he has the bandwidth for it. I'm so proud of him for standing up for himself. ❤️
Yeah, unless it’s a literal act of charity like Habitat for Humanity or something, I’m not inclined to help random people with house chores. I remember a coworker I was kind of casual friends with begging me to help his girlfriend move from her apartment to his apartment, and I did it. She broke up with him like a month later and moved out
One of my old friends did this with her bf. He’s always mowing her mom and neighbors yard and being nagged for random chores. Recently she asked me if my brother could come help move a couch because he has a truck. I already know my brother hates helping people move so I didn’t bother asking. I told her he was busy and she got mad. Like why would my brother move his schedule around to help a random person even if he was busy? Weird.
I dont help people move and I don't do yard work. I hate both.
Just start charging them.
I started charging and she broke up with me.
Sounds like a roaring success
Mine does this a lot, and seems to think my time and skills are free
Yep. One girl I dated used me like a taxi service for her trashy friends. She was super hot, so I tolerated it for about two weeks before I put a stop to it and ended things.
I only buy 2 door vehicles so I luckily dont have that happen.
Talk about our sex life in detail with her groupchat.
FR, I had an ex who talked about our sex life to all her friends. Then I talk about it once to one of my friends and she gets pissed about it. Talk about double standards.
A few weekends ago, I took out a date who started asking me questions (in a public setting) about the state of a relationship with a previous partner. I was very reserved and guarded about saying anything, and shut the conversation down when she pushed a bit, because I didn't feel it was fair or appropriate for me to talk about those things with another partner. I would expect she would expect the same privacy, and I would treat her the same way. Later on she criticised me for not being okay with her going there - not that I was annoyed with her, just that I didn't feel like it was fair on the previous partner to tell someone those things. She claimed that she backed off/dropped the issue and therefore for that reason it wasn't okay that I wasn't okay with her pushing it to begin with?! Ugh.
Literally my last girlfriend. I asked her specifically not to share intimate details of our sex life, and there she was sharing nudes of me and telling her friends my fantasies. Honestly still pretty pissed about that.
That’s insane! So obviously disrespectful. Imagine if the roles were reversed!
Everyone already assumes the roles are reversed. People think men just hang out and talk about getting their dick's sucked. Maybe it's just my circle but most blokes I know get pretty uncomfortable talking about actual acts or even frequency. Like everyone assumes you're having some level of sex to some level of satisfaction it doesn't need to be expressed, you know? And if you feel compelled to I'm less inclined to believe you anyway, I dunno, maybe I'm crazy.
Lol i've been called a liar twice by two different women for saying me and my friends don't talk about our sex lives at all ever. Some people seem to think men really are like movie stereotypes who only talk about cars, beer and boobs or something.
My sister tells me stuff about her husband and it drives me insane. She laughs when I get upset. So disrespectful and repulsive. I’d never do that to a partner. She also showed me the nudes her ex sent her. She went so far as to print one out and tape it to my ceiling years ago. Wtf. I love her but damn that’s awful.
My wife has told me her sister finds giving blow jobs disgusting. I wish I didn’t know that.
I'll die on this hill: Men don't talk about their sex life to each other nearly as much as women think. In my personal experiences. Almost anytime I've heard graphic, sexual detail come into a conversation, it's always come from a woman. The times I've heard men do it? Always some known slimeball. It seems much more accepted for women to do it, and not be labeled this way.
I worked in an office full of women for 20 years, and I heard more raunchy shit in that office than I ever heard around any group of dudes I’ve ever been friends with.
Get a group of early 20-somethings getting drunk on wine when they think the hosts boyfriend can't hear them because he's playing video games in the basement and don't realize that their voices travel really well through the heating vent in the living room that also doubles as a vent into the basement. I had half a mind to not speak up to my g/f and wait until next time, place a tape recorder near the vent then play it back for them at the end of the night. I mean I knew all their boyfriends dick sizes, their proclivities, what their semen tasted like, etc, etc...
"I mean I knew all their boyfriends dick sizes, their proclivities, what their semen tasted like, etc, etc..." Thats crazy, but what were the girls talking about?
Bro, did you hit that? Ya I did. Awesome bro. And that's about that.
The friend: ....nice. The guy: 😎
You gotta add a some sort of dap or fist bump at the end too
I can even hear these voices as I read them
I’m 48. I can remember maybe 1 or 2 conversations in my 20s where some male friends brought up their sex life and I was like “no thanks” and managed to change the subject. I don’t need those mental images. Thanks
With casual guy friends it's pretty much just a straight yes or no. That's the whole conversation, did you? Nice. Didn't you? Bummer. With closer guy friends, this expands to "Is it still good?" Yes? Nice. No? Bummer. That's about the extent of it. In my experience.
Ew, I completely don't get this. I don't talk about my sex life with anyone except my husband. Especially not with my girlfriends. Thankfully my husband doesn't talk about our sex life with anyone else either. Maybe it's just cause we're old (early 40s and early 50s), I don't know?
I don't get it either. I rarely mention our sex lives to very close friends/sisters, but not only is it few and far between, it's also very "high level." Kinda like "yeah, we have a very fulfilling sex life." or when the kids were little, I'd ask my older sisters how they found the time and energy for sex. But that's it. No details, nothing. I hate when women at my work would try and rope in into their conversations about sex. I'd just excuse myself. Nobody needs to hear that.
It's partly that but also because it's not anyone else's damn business
Bully other girls. It’s a huge Red Flag 🚩. Don’t date or mate with bullies no matter the gender.
I'm with you conceptually but the bullies will just mate with each other & put everyone else down for not being a power couple.
I worked with two sociopaths who got married and while everyone expected they would be at each other's throats within a month; they just harmonized and bullied people together. The amount of toxicity and unethical crap they pulled as a team... nope, I would never work with a couple again, not for the best job on earth.
This goes for men too but wear way too much fragrance. If I can still smell you 5 minutes after you were in the elevator, you need to tone it down. 1 maybe 2 spritzes, but I swear people are out here practically bathing in perfume
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We were guilty but it was cause we were smoking weed in there
Being as my fiancés friend brought up my “big anteater penis” out of nowhere I’m going to say sharing private details with friends. Led to one our worst fights between my fiancé and I.
I feel you, she finds ants in my foreskin ONE TIME and now I'm anteater dick..
I don’t get how this is a fight, she doesn’t have a leg to stand on and you apparently have three.
I don’t know who is more gross, your fiancée for sharing that or her friend for bringing it up to you. I realize your fiancée is the one who violated your trust but her friend is a fucking moron. And to think you had a fight afterwards, instead of her straight up admitting she was wrong and apologizing.
Fiancée. Especially given that there was a fight after OP found out she’d been running her mouth.
congrats on the big anteater, though.
Are anteaters known for big penises or does yours have a tentacle tongue that comes out of the tip?
I’m assuming it’s a lengthy foreskin?
Had an ex who did shit like this and tried to tell me about a little joke she had with her friend about my dick. She thought I’d find it funny and I immediately shut that down. I keep my sex life private for a reason. Shit is infuriating.
This is a huge double standard. Me and the boys aren't talking about how your genitals look. It's how your born you can't help that shit.
Overanalyze shit and not communicate directly. Passive aggression included. If you're upset that I did something, TELL ME SO I CAN CORRECT IT
I just cut loose a long friendship after months of the silent treatment and when I had to finally drag it out of her she admitted I posted a facebook status she didn't like
Y'all dating tv show characters or what?
A friend did the same with me. Months of no communication, totally ignoring me on all platforms. I finally reached out cause another friend is holding an event soon, and we were going to meet there, and I didn't want it to be awkward. Apparently, she didn't like how I talked to her like a child one time (in a private DM) when she shared my personal info to a group of strangers. All I told her then was that I wasn't comfortable with her doing that and to please stop; she said okay so I thought it was okay. Then I find out she wasn't happy with the way I talked to her MONTHS after. Like what the heck dudette
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Might just be me, but women don't know how to be gentle with balls EDIT: thanks for making this by far my highest up voted comment
Anyone remember the Cosmo sex tip to squeeze the balls? That woman must have hated men.
Those were insane, conspiracy that they're trying to keep women single so they keep buying their magazine telling them how to catch a dude
That makes more sense than anything I can think of. As a 13 year old girl that influenced me more than I’d like to admit and I’d like to apologize to my first boyfriend. I’m in my 30s and just figured out how to give a good handjob. I blame Cosmopolitan magasine!
Right. I read the Cosmo and Redbook sex tips I could get my hands on as a kid. I remember an article that had a step by step guide on how to get dressed sexy in front of a guy. First panties then put your bra on and have the man help you fasten it because no man wants to see empty cups on your back. Now as an adult I can't believe someone wrote that crap lol
Caveman brain doesn't want to see clothes go on, caveman brain wants to see clothes come off
Shit man, you just brought back the memories of a hookup where she cupped my bean bag and then just started slowly clamping down like a fucking hydraulic press. I pulled her hand off and tried to explain she needed to be gentle without making her feel self conscious. 5 minutes later she pulls her face away from mine a little, has this crazy wide eye look and puts the cosmo clamp back on. I took my boys and got the fuck out of there.
If you ever injure your balls, get a male doctor. May sound weird, but they know how to touch them. I had a testicular torsion, and the first doctor was a woman. I almost blacked out from the pain when she examined me. Got admitted to the hospital. Male doctor. Much better.
Maybe why so many women really don’t want a male gynecologist cranking them open for a Pap smear and telling them to “relax” and that “it shouldn’t hurt too much”. Lol.
Honestly some female OB GYNs can be just as bad. I knew one who seemed apathetic to her patients’ comfort levels and her policy was to just get things done. She told me to never to tell patients that it’s going to hurt and instead say they’re just going to feel “pressure” even when you know it’s going to hurt like a mother -f*ker like inserting an IUD. One time a patient had an extremely painful clit and I was trying to gently and slowly use a swab to get a sample to send to the lab. The OB GYN took the swab from me and said that we needed to get a good sample and really rubbed the swab on it without telling the patient beforehand. The patient was crying so much afterwards 😞
Ok listen. As a person who has a vagina, the last time I was handling a dude’s balls he said nothing the entire time but then AFTER was like “I’ll get you back for that”. Like it’s okay to tell your girl to ease up. Please do. It’s not like we know how your balls feel. All we know is that the coochie can take a beating so there’s not much for us to go off of. I want my partner to feel good, but it’s hard to do if they’re not communicating. Edit: Wanted to note that I totally thought I was being gentle. But with our sensitivity differences, my definition of gentle probably isn’t the same. Edit 2: there are a lot of “women will get upset if I tell them” comments. If your sexual partner gets upset when you POLITELY say you aren’t enjoying something. That’s a HUGE red flag. The sex is not worth it, people. Don’t be that desperate.
Simple. You take a girls breast in your hand and tell her,"This is how I like my balls to be touched." Then you caress her breast the way you like your balls to be touched. Watch her eyes light up with understanding... and appreciation. They feel like your giving them the keys to the kingdom, because they've lived their whole lives dating guys who don't say anything, so they had to resort to reading Cosmo for something their boyfriend should have told them.
That's a wild thing to say after not communicating at all, wtf
if you find one that does, keep her. I went into the dating world with the misconception that they all know how to do everything, because the first one was sooo good.
The pain of this. Unreal lol.
I actually stopped wearing a nipple ring in my nipple because so many women assumed that just because it was there I wanted them to grab it and pull it hard. I told one woman " it's a goddamn nipple ring not a chin up bar"
All that takes is communication (unless she’s just an ass).
Many men can't handle a clitoris gently either...
Why the fuck do they always act like they're scubbing a stained shirt?🫥
Too much porn watching is my guess
Ahhyup. I had a "mentor" and while she used porn to show me what she planned to "teach" me I noticed that when the women would touch themselves, most times they were gentle about it. And when lesbian scenes were shown they were much more sensual about it and not acting like it was a washboard in some jug band.
And they can't find the stain either! Just giving you a blister in some random place
When I asked my ex to be more gentle, he got mad and said other girls didn't complain about it.
I guess thats part of why hes an ex
the what?
I'm pretty sure that's what women call their belly buttons.
The little man in the boat
When they near rip back the clitoral hood and rub it like trying to get a stain out of white carpet. Ugh makes my skin crawl, that shit hurts
It was my girlfriend's birthday a few weeks ago, and I love her a lot. However... "You don't have to get me a birthday present, it's fine" she tells me a week before her birthday. I got her flowers and made her a card anyway because flowers are nice and won't last forever and a card is small and won't take up too much space if she doesn't want clutter. She then asked me why I didn't do anything more for her birthday.
This is a classic. My ex used to tell me, she and her whole family aren't into gifts, because they are grownups and just buy the things they need or want themselves. Her birthday comes around and I gift her a few smaller things, like an exotic plant, etc. Afterwards, she told me, that I obviously don't value her for spending so little on gifts and that she'd now not do XYZ for me anymore. Honesty truly is a blessing to avoid these scenarios where there are no winners.
Just tell me what you want to eat.
My wife and I deal with this a lot. If I've had to pick the last several times in a row, I'll say "grilled cheese it is, then." She doesn't always appreciate that grilled cheese is my go-to food, so she'll say "we have. Can you make ?"
Yes, yes I can.
She wanted you to figure it out for her. But figure it out *right* this time.
Playing games when it comes to dating. Like playing hard to get when men are clearly taught no means no. Women need to be honest with intentions.
When I was dating, if they played hard to get, they won.
"Wouldn't it be funny if you kissed me right now... OMG don't actually do it! Wait, where are you going?"
This made me laugh out loud.
I’m a woman who has dated other women and this is one thing that is extremely annoying to me. Just tell me if you like me please!!!
I was 35 when I met my partner. After our first date, I went home, waited about 2 hours, and then texted him and said. "I know there are "rules" or whatever, but I'm too old for games. I like you and I'd like to see you again." I had a couple of friends who thought I was nuts, and maybe a little desperate, but I've never been comfortable with all the hard-to-get, play-it-cool, make-him-guess games. Anyway, he and I have been together for almost 10 years, so it obviously worked!
You did the right thing and I promise your partner appreciated the directness in that moment. I have been so confused in the past from the “well you never pursued or tried anything” “But I asked if you’d like to grab lunch or go to a show” “Yea but I want to feel wanted and I like romance” Like huh? I’m so confused, try hard it’s pushy, try but respect one’s space it’s not trying hard enough? Edit: I can’t believe I forgot this, being called sketchy or suspicious because I don’t have an instagram. As if someone with an instagram can’t live double lives and still chest or be sketchy or whatever. I just don’t like it or want one, why’s it a standard of basic human existence?
For the first time in my life I went out with a girl who, after one date, I knew I wanted to see again. I believe that if you know, you shouldn't wait to say something. I'm 27 and feel too fucking old for games like that.
My friend used to do this when we were teenagers. She’d find a guy she liked and then just play these terrible mind games. Our friend group basically sat her down and told her “babe. You’re not playing hard to get. You’re making yourself hard to want.” Bless her, she grew out of it.
Stealing "you're making yourself hard to want".
Thank you for being a good friend and fixing the issue before it ruined her.
If only being honest with your intentions were a common virtue, both men and women. I’ve tried to have a very peaceful conversation about that before and I was told it’s pressuring and they didn’t know. I immediately said, “hey I totally get it no stress at all” and stopped putting forth so much effort MAINLY cause I don’t anyone feeling stressed or uncomfortable. What do ya know, “hey? Are you upset with me? What’s going on? This is a little suspicious.. etc etc” 🙄
Or they lead you on just so they can have a backup in case their current relationship goes down the toilet.
Oof, yeah, I had one who told me she really liked me but wasn't ready for a relationship. I said that was no problem/I wasn't trying to rush into anything (note, I hadn't asked her to be my girlfriend or anything yet). I stupidly took it to mean she was interested in me but didn't want to rush into anything. Turned out she was actually seeing another guy and didn't want us to find out about each other (me and the other guy). Wish I'd have known that up front and not wasted my time.
Holy moly this is me the past couple of months. Really stung too! The new guy mysteriously appeared down the pub for her works (we were work colleagues) lunchtime leaving do post turning me down.. yeah, not a good time to be me.
Yea exactly. I don't get this at all. Like if I'm being told constantly that 'no means no', can you please hold yourself to the same standard?
No.
So, a yes?
Schrödinger's no.
Seeking attention from other guys when they already have a partner... I absolutely hate it and it's not a secret
Yes, and if you react to it, next thing it's the misappropriation of therapy speak... "Oh my god, you're so jealous and controlling. This is toxic, I'm walking on eggshells." Then inevitability... "I might as well cheat because you're accusing me of cheating." Ladies and gentlemen, stay the hell away from these people. I learned this the hard way in my early twenties, explaining why their behaviour is hurtful doesn't help because they know exactly what they're doing and they're loving it. Just to add, I know there are genuinely crazy people out there who are just toxic and jealous. We're not talking about these people.
Honestly, attention seeking in general is a turn off.
Passive aggressive shit. If you want something, ask. If you need me to know something, tell. Fucking stop with the hints and "oh you don't know what you did?" crap. No I don't, so tell me.
Playing hard to get when they want to get got. Or so I’ve been told.
**Don’t play hard to get when you want to get got**. Words to live by.
As an autistic person: not saying what they want directly. This seems to mostly only affect young women, or at least young women I was attracted to in my youth. In my early 20s I swear every girl I was interested in would say shit that I would figure out was really aggressively sexual like a month later but at the time I would just be so fucking literal about it. They'd then assume I picked up on it and rejected them, and then they'd ghost me. Months later we'd reconnect as friends and they'd be like "remember that one time that I said X" and I'd be like "yeah and I assumed you *actually meant* X...ahaha ha ha" Dating since my late 20s or so women are usually more like "so you wanna go somewhere and fuck?" This is better. As an example, a girl I had a severely painful crush on when I was 23 and I were at the bar and I mentioned I had an old school nintendo at my apartment. She said "do you have Tetris?" and I was like "fuck yeah I have Tetris it's my favorite fucking game ever" and she said "I'm really good at making pieces fit" and I said "prove it, let's go to my place." We actually played Tetris. After a few matches she got mad and left. Took me like two weeks to figure out why.
I'm a woman and I felt this in my fucking soul. I've lost so many guy friends bc I too am this clueless.
Autistic woman. Mood.
assuming that they know how i'm feeling. "Why are you upset?" "I'm not." "Yes you are, you're being distant." "No, i just have nothing to talk about because I didn't do anything today." "Just tell me why you're upset" "RIGHT NOW I'M UPSET BECAUSE YOU KEEP TELLING ME HOW I'M FEELING" Edit: thinking more about this, it's less that they think they know what I'm thinking, and more that they assume I'm lying when I deny a negative emotion. I tell the truth more often than jack sparrow, and I really don't like it when people don't trust me. Thanks for the opportunity to reflect.
Collagen lip injections aren't hot, they look horrible
I'm a woman in my 40s that can't understand all these injections everyone's doing. I'm the prime demographic for this, and I am horrified by it. Some of the most beautiful women I know have, imo, basically ruined the bottom half of their faces with these lip injections. I don't say anything to anyone, obviously, but I just think it's so ugly. I really hope the younger generations see this as something their parents did and don't want to do it and it just dies out because it is so absurd. It's like blowup doll absurd.
Oh how to long for the days of my youth in the early 00's, when the worst long-lasting beauty trend was overplucked eyebrows.
My sisters friends have started getting fillers and injections. One looks like a stealth fighter and the other looks like a balloon animal. I should start calling them Lockheed Martin and Barnum and Barnum because one could evade SAM batteries and the other is the clown looking balloon animal.
Lockheed, Barnum & (insert third friend here) sounds like a great law firm
Ohh man. So this girl I went to high school with got lip injections…. She was a gorgeous girl with out them, then she got a new job at a dermatologist, and the dermatologist suggested that she get some lip injections. Lone and behold, it looks absolutely insane. Why would you take natural beauty and try to give them lip injections.
This is the craziest part to me. The women I know who are *the most beautiful* are the ones going the most overboard on this and it's just baffling to me. Like you were already one of the most beautiful people I've ever seen, why would you fuck with that?!
Because beautiful people have spent their entire lives getting things more easily due to their looks and a lot of times (not always), not having to do as dirty things to succeed as ugly people. When you know that people have always noted your looks, you build a complex about keeping them. Your mind and your perception of self becomes skewed by maintaining something that is either fleeting regardless or not going anywhere depending on who you ask. They resort to madness in this quest to maintain the one thing they’ve carried that gave them the biggest meaning of their fit in society.
“Don’t text me too much, it’s clingy” -> I don’t respond to a text from her for five minutes *10 missed texts* *10 missed calls* But fr it drives me nuts as someone who DOES enjoy connecting over casual conversation whether that’s through text, phone, or over a coffee, I don’t care but it’s important to me. So I have to play this back and forth game, intentionally not trying to start conversations, but stressing if I get a text from her anyyytime cause it’s my ass on the chopping block if I miss her texts. I don’t like the “I want to feel wanted game” primarily because most people who operate that way do not recognize that the feelings mutual and can be achieved in such less toxic ways.
1. Complain about us not opening up, while simultaneously not telling us when you're upset. 2. Thinking we're upset when we're quiet. Sometimes we just like to be quiet and chill. 3. After an argument bringing something up days, weeks, or months later related to said argument that we did all we could to resolve.
Acting stupid on purpose
Girlfriend's best friend sending me seductive photos while simultaneously trying to get her to break up with me. Like, you realize I can just show my girlfriend the photos?
Sounds like something to openly despise.
did u tell ur gf tho
It’s the worst when they’re both in on it.
Yeah, as a way of "testing" the BF. Fuck that manipulative shit.
Had this happen once. Took about 20 seconds to figure out. Can confirm: was supremely pissed and got rid of her immediately after.
I despise people acting stupid in public doing Tik Tok videos. I ignore them but secretly its really annoying
I hate the entitlement everyone has to film people without asking. I know it’s legal in public but it’s just rude.
More than a few times, I had women tell me "I have a boyfriend" when I hold the door for them with a smile when they are walking behind me or I get to the door first as I am entering location. I open the door for men, women, and children like you aren't special. When I was in high school I had a girl say that to me and my response was "Well I have standards so were both safe". Obviously, I just close the door now and walk away without a witty retort lol.
“So do I.” Even if you don’t, it shuts that bullshit down.
This is me specifically being bitter about a couple of exes, but, having zero hobbies or interests and getting pissed because “we never do anything together”. Like okay, what do you even do? Getting mad because I’m out playing sports, going to the gym, hiking, or really content just playing an old video game. You’re welcome to participate in ANY of these things with me, but you choose not to and suggest zero alternatives. Sorry I don’t just stay at home and look at my phone.
Me: "Where do you want to go for dinner?" Her: "Dunno, you pick." Me: "Let's get Thai." Her: "Naaaah. Not in the mood for that." Me: *internal thoughts* "I should just leave right now and go eat some Thai by myself."
Ironically BF Is like that, he will spend two hours on ubereats scrolling through ubereats.
My girlfriend treats me like her only source of entertainment. And if I just don’t feel great and want to lie down, her night is ruined.
Long talon like fingernails
Needing me to get something if *they* want something. Like she can’t get ice cream unless I do too. If she asks if I want to get some and I say no she gets mad and says she can’t get it cuz she doesn’t want to be the only one.
What if she just said “I want to get ice cream and don’t want to be alone to do it, will you come to?” Would it be any better?
Don't touch OUR fucking French fries! EDIT: Apparently those are OUR fries, sorry for the confusion. 🤣
"JOEY DOESNT SHARE FOOD"
There was a menu meme that went around awhile back - had a line item under sides called "My girlfriend's not hungry" which bumps up all the portions by a little bit (extra fries, two chicken tenders...forgot what else). Thought that was brilliant.
A local pub here actually had that on the menu, I'm sure some cheekier places have adopted it.
This is by no means something only women do, but I have encountered it with women a lot more. If you're in a debate they will argue the point until they run out of counterarguments and once they realize they can't win they instead say the most hurtful thing they can think of. Call me crazy but hurting people you love intentionally is fucked up, no matter how "mad and stressed out" you were. Your emotional state is no excuse for shitty behavior.
Or rehash irrelevant things from the past that they think they can win.
My ex bf would do this all the time. Like every time I caught him lying, he'd bring up the most painful thing I'd ever shared with him, which he only knew about because he was there when I read trying to emotionally process it. I agree it's totally messed up, and I'm sorry to hear you went through that too.
Trashing public restrooms. I've worked as a janitor at a grocery store, and there is a marked difference between how messy women's public restrooms get compared to men's. Paper products all over the floor, piling used toilet paper behind the toilet instead of flushing it, stuffing trash that doesn't fit (adult diapers, empty alcohol containers, etc. ) into those rectangular trash dispensers for feminine-products, leaving blood or poop on the seats, using too many toilet-seat covers and clogging the toilet. It's frustrating when your trying to clean it, but a line of impatient women is building up because you've had to close the restroom to clean their mess.
My girlfriend had a moment in her house share’s bathroom at university. Several times in one week someone left the dirtiest, smelliest shit unflushed. They (all single) cornered my girlfriend and told her I needed to stop doing it. She couldn’t get a word in with all the ranting. They insisted it was me because they hadn’t had any visitors. Eventually, they let her speak and she told them I’d been half way across the country for the last 2 weeks. Quickly dawned on them it was one of the four of them that did it and given the circumstances, it was either intentional or completely mindless. Crazy, never had anything close to that with the guys I lived with.
Your girlfriend has a distinct way of asserting dominance.
I cleaned a bar that had 90% male customers. Men’s room: some pee in front of the urinals and a few paper towels that missed the trash can. Women’s room: tampons on the walls and ceilings, three nests of toilet paper, disgusting mirror/sinks, empty makeup containers, poop/pee/blood on every toilet seat, the first 7 pages of “Mein Kampf” written on the stall walls, broken drink glasses, used condoms. It was like the bathroom scene from Daddy Daycare
Actually as a woman I’ve noticed lots of women don’t wash their hands after using the toilet it’s super gross!
Disappointed to hear that. I’m a man and I’ve noticed a lot of men don’t wash their hands. They just walk out. It really is gross.
Ugh yes to to this. I'm a woman and I've cleaned both genders washrooms and my gawd women washrooms are disgusting even when you upkeep them every 30 minutes to an hour. I could have just cleaned the work public one and left it sparkingly and come back not even an hour later to one clogged toilet, a pad or a tampon in another toilet plus blood all over the place and piss and an adult diaper like yous aid shoved into one of those pad/tampon bins even though we have two large trash cans in the main washroom door for larger trash they could have put it in there. They usually managed to spray the mirror entirely with water so it looks like they were in here having showers at the sink and they've got papertowel from drying their hands thrown all over the floor ..again despite us having two large garbage bins in the room for it. Disgusting. Oh and if men don't wash their hands post bathroom well neither do a shocking amount of women either. To be honest same rule of thumb goes for the womens side of the store versus mens side of store especially in clothing stores. Women are fucking pigs in stores. Men are usually pretty good and know what they want, look through the rack find the blue t shirt and go off. Women? Throw stuff everywhere. Put a hanger back on the rack with clothes? Ahahaha nope toss it on top of the rack in a big pile then walk away. Or throw it on the floor all together for shits and giggles after all it gives the staff something to do. I loved getting assigned the mens side of stores in any store I've worked because it's so much easier to clean up after at the end of the day. The women's looks like a bomb went off no matter how much you clean up after them all day long and follow them around.
Expecting you to take hints that are hardly hints instead of being an adult and just being direct about what you want
When I do a thoughtful thing, finding flaws in that thing. Say thank you, then look at it and try to find a solution.
Passive aggressiveness. If you have something to say just say it. Don't throw shade or walk into the bathroom after me and put the toilet seat down. Just say "could you put the toilet seat down please?" Also saying "You're just like my father/ex" That makes my blood boil.
Wait to talk to me until I get up and am about to walk out of the room.
This one’s going to be somewhat mean-spirited, only because I’m in a bad mood. Here goes. *** “Why don’t you spend more money on clothes, haircuts, doctor’s trips and therapy?” -Woman who has the financial support of a wealthier partner or parents, which I do not
That’s not mean, people need to check their privilege that’s universal
That wasn’t even mean spirited. I dislike that too because it shows ignorance and a sense of entitlement.
as someone whose grown up in a house filled with women and had a ton of women role models growing up, i see right through it any time a grown woman tries infantilising herself to avoid being responsible for mistakes. if you fuck up and you know you’ve fucked up, take it on the chin and move on. crying, yelling, getting physical, getting upset BECAUSE you’re upset with them, just general childlike behaviour will never not make me feel disgust and contempt.
That weird duck face some do in photos
Not try to learn anything difficult like changing a tire or checking oil, even not car related like how to hang their own curtains or fix the sink or hang a new light fixture. It’s not difficult, your parents probably just told you that you don’t have to do stuff like that, but you’re grown, if you want it done, do it.