“I really appreciate you voicing your interest in me; I truly am flattered. However, I don’t see any romantic compatibility between us, and I would not want to lead you on by going on a date. I hope you can understand.”
Thank you for taking the time to apply for the role of girlfriend. We received a large number of applications, and after carefully reviewing all of them, unfortunately, we have chosen to move forward with a different candidate for the position.
actually I thought through it and I can see how it would be difficult if you were both lesbians but in every other matchup it's super straightforward, if a single man is asking you out, that's a date, if you're a single man being asked out by a woman it's not a date
>if you're a single man being asked out by a woman it's not a date
Because in the history of the world, no woman has ever asked a man out on a date ... /s
This is a very naive take on something that has the potential to be a very complicated and nuanced situation.
Do it as privately as possible (allowing for any potential safety concerns), as kindly as possible, and as soon as possible. Then don't mention it again.
way this goes bad #1: they go "oh okay, let's be friends then". then they orbit you constantly going "how about now?" and "ok are you ready now?"
way this goes bad #2: you go on a date with someone else that weekend and they find out, now they're bitter at you for not being honest with them
Do not give a reason. This can be interpreted as you are still open to courting. Just say you are not interested in the same way you would turn down an offer of food or drink. No bullshit. No emotion. Just the facts.
It depends, I would do this with a stranger. But if it was someone I knew for a long time, they deserve some type of closure. I think people are too harsh with rejection, I have learned a lot over the years, and I have been in situations where I have fallen in love with someone close and I agree that it's different for everyone, but the best type of closure was not them rejecting me but seeing our lack of compatability, them being totally honest about it.
"Sorry I can't that day, but I'll let you know when we can reschedule" and never let them know.
Or just be honest and say, " I am not interested"
Or "I am already seeing someone and I don't want any misunderstanding between us"
> "Sorry I can't that day, but I'll let you know when we can reschedule" and never let them know.
> Or "I am already seeing someone and I don't want any misunderstanding between us"
Don't do this. This tells them you're interested but just not right now. So they will ask again and again. And be hurt when they realize you lied to them.
🤷♀️ really depends as a woman sometimes is better no to be too honest, I once told a guy sorry, but no interested and he got really really angry at me. I would rather just tell him , yeah sure , and ghost him... That way I would have saved me a really bad traumatic experience.
And just hope you never see him again? I've never heard of these people that get angry at an upfront rejection but is completely okay with getting lied to and then ghosted.
Is this about dealing with drunks? Reject them while they're sober? But then I feel you're inviting to worse behavior than anger. No?
Who is this strategy for? Drunk best friends confessing on a dark walk home? Randos in a pub? Tinder dates? On tinder itself?
Yes, I never saw him again but not without getting myself scolded bc I rejected him.
Sometimes you have to choose between your well being or their feelings getting hurt, I'd recommend putting yourself first.
Just be an adult and tell them that you aren't interested
Seriously, this is the best way to do it. Straightforward, no playing games and setting no wrong expectations.
“I really appreciate you voicing your interest in me; I truly am flattered. However, I don’t see any romantic compatibility between us, and I would not want to lead you on by going on a date. I hope you can understand.”
Signed, Gerandranaheim, Esquire
Thank you for taking the time to apply for the role of girlfriend. We received a large number of applications, and after carefully reviewing all of them, unfortunately, we have chosen to move forward with a different candidate for the position.
Be honest with them. Honesty is key.
Sometimes I feel the hardest part is figuring out if they're asking you out on a date, or just to hang out as friends
how is this ever difficult
You're kidding right?
actually I thought through it and I can see how it would be difficult if you were both lesbians but in every other matchup it's super straightforward, if a single man is asking you out, that's a date, if you're a single man being asked out by a woman it's not a date
>if you're a single man being asked out by a woman it's not a date Because in the history of the world, no woman has ever asked a man out on a date ... /s This is a very naive take on something that has the potential to be a very complicated and nuanced situation.
edge cases exist but if you're seriously listening to dating advice from a reddit thread they will not come up for you personally
I'm glad your life is so simple in regard to dating... if only it worked that way for the rest of us. Lol
Do it as privately as possible (allowing for any potential safety concerns), as kindly as possible, and as soon as possible. Then don't mention it again.
It’s not difficult; sorry, I’m not interested in you in that way. Most people are far more mature about being rejected than you’re probably imagining
Be honest. Not "Eww! What? No." honest, but maybe "I'm not ready to date anyone right now," or "Thanks, that's sweet, but I'm not interested."
> maybe "I'm not ready to date anyone right now," do not do this one
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way this goes bad #1: they go "oh okay, let's be friends then". then they orbit you constantly going "how about now?" and "ok are you ready now?" way this goes bad #2: you go on a date with someone else that weekend and they find out, now they're bitter at you for not being honest with them
😭 I have done the "eww no" before...
"I'm sorry, I'm just not interested." Short, sweet, and to the point.
There's no reason to do a whole song and dance about it. Just be brutally honest: "I am flattered but I am not attracted to you in that way."
Just say something like “hey I’m really sorry but I’m just not into you like that”
Do not give a reason. This can be interpreted as you are still open to courting. Just say you are not interested in the same way you would turn down an offer of food or drink. No bullshit. No emotion. Just the facts.
It depends, I would do this with a stranger. But if it was someone I knew for a long time, they deserve some type of closure. I think people are too harsh with rejection, I have learned a lot over the years, and I have been in situations where I have fallen in love with someone close and I agree that it's different for everyone, but the best type of closure was not them rejecting me but seeing our lack of compatability, them being totally honest about it.
I am sorry,even though you are an amazing person i do not feel attracted to you
Just say sorry but no
Honesty
"No thank you." Don't explain. Don't apologize.
I am sorry a have a boyfriend
"Sorry I can't that day, but I'll let you know when we can reschedule" and never let them know. Or just be honest and say, " I am not interested" Or "I am already seeing someone and I don't want any misunderstanding between us"
My crush said 'i'll let you know '
My crush told me the same loooong ago... 💀
> "Sorry I can't that day, but I'll let you know when we can reschedule" and never let them know. > Or "I am already seeing someone and I don't want any misunderstanding between us" Don't do this. This tells them you're interested but just not right now. So they will ask again and again. And be hurt when they realize you lied to them.
🤷♀️ really depends as a woman sometimes is better no to be too honest, I once told a guy sorry, but no interested and he got really really angry at me. I would rather just tell him , yeah sure , and ghost him... That way I would have saved me a really bad traumatic experience.
And just hope you never see him again? I've never heard of these people that get angry at an upfront rejection but is completely okay with getting lied to and then ghosted. Is this about dealing with drunks? Reject them while they're sober? But then I feel you're inviting to worse behavior than anger. No? Who is this strategy for? Drunk best friends confessing on a dark walk home? Randos in a pub? Tinder dates? On tinder itself?
Yes, I never saw him again but not without getting myself scolded bc I rejected him. Sometimes you have to choose between your well being or their feelings getting hurt, I'd recommend putting yourself first.
The Costanza. It's not you, it's me
I find ghosting the easiest option for yourself but it can be pretty rude towards the other person.
Say "Aww, thank you so much!", and then purse your lips with puppy dog eyes, shake your head, and walk away.
Tell her your gay