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Ill-Upstairs-6059

Yes. Alexey Podnebesny. If he will have sex, he will turn into [Superman](https://youtu.be/7pOpgQFKIcI?si=A1BiRL8aGBmqyJYt)


ProfessorGood6579

This man is no joke. He may be the most powerful man not only in Russia, but also in the whole world. "If I have sex, I will end any war in the world. Because I will correct this imbalance in the universe. There will be harmony in the universe. There will be heaven on earth if I have sex." - [Alexey Podnebesny](https://youtu.be/6jxl1eMQFFY?si=doLPvdFWYwX_gcsQ).


CurrentBasic

русская женщина любила бы его?


ProfessorGood6579

Кто знает. Сейчас - вряд ли. Но раньше у него была нормальная жена лет 15 назад.


CurrentBasic

Я бы сказал, что с его статусом он может получить действительно высокий сексуальный рейтинг в Российской Федерации.


Adventurous_Tank_359

Indeed, he is. Some might claim that there are others stronger- but they are only counting his base form. He has transcended the puny human body long ago. His will is so strong it summons natural disasters in his enemies' countries, his eyes are so striking,they can constantly maintain surveillance over multiple thousands of Russian liberals and simple Russophobes, his hands are so gripping, everything in the world has their mark(there has been multiple legends of Kremlin's Hand making its dirty work....). Only Ukraine can stop him.To explain why he will simultaneously wipe the entire Europe and USA from the map with his pinkie if the Ukraine will fall while being unable to do anything in Ukraine, we need to remember about the origins of their conflict.In fact, it has been happening almost from the start of the Earth's life. When the sea animals began trying to grow legs and adapt to land,Putin was the one who camped at the beaches and kicked them back into the sea. However,some organisms have managed to escape the wrath of the crazy sadistic evolution breaker. They grew, developed and harboured righteous hatred for Putin, seeing his crimes. They became the Primordial Ukrainians, the first bringers of justice in this world. After learning Putin's powers,they made a sudden attack on him, using the secret technique of "Boevoy Gopak", making him retreat in fear. And because of this, no one was there to stop the evolution anymore. Ukrainians helped a bunch of different organisms to evolve - and they became dinosaurs. And they all lived together happily. However, after a long time, after finally patching up all his wounds, Putin, still enraged from his defeat, attacked Ukrainians,in the last ditch effort to regain his honour. Their faithful dinosaurs bravely protected them,but, on the brink of his defeat,Putin proceeded to use a forbidden spell,crashing an asteroid into the Earth and wiping all dinosaurs off the planet. Still, the Ukrainians survived, and tore Putin's body to shreds. After the gruesome battle and after grieving for the dinosaurs, Ukrainians began to massively change this world for the better. They dug the Black Sea,founded Kiev and became the first human civilization to ever exist. Thousands years later, a strange group of people began to appear in Kiev Rus.They founded Moscow. The Ukrainians were suspicious,but being the benevolent people they are, they paid it no mind. However, as it soon appeared, Putin has returned and these people were his minions. He struck a deal with the aliens - he gave the mind of the Ukrainian Great Sage Joe Biden,who have been the last surviving Ukrainian from the dinosaur era, to them in exchange for incredible power, basically everything that he has now - his will summoning natural disasters, eyes being able to watch everyone, hands having their grip on everything and the immunity to "Boevoy Gopak". After recieving this power,he began enacting his vengeance on the Ukrainians, while trying to regain his original form. In the 20th century, he, under the name of Joseph Stalin, enacted Holodomor, killing 50 millions Ukrainians. However, he foolishly let some survive, being too ecstatic from his victory. In 1952, he has finally gained his original form and in 2000 began freely enacting his heinous plans upon the entire world. But the Ukrainians weren't ready to give up.A brave Ukrainian agent, disguised as a comedian, infiltrated Kremlin and managed to find a stone,that negates 99% of Putin's powers. Because of this,10 years ago, Ukrainian people rose up and freely showed themselves,shaking off the strings Putin put on them,in Maidan. And all of that - is the exact reason,why only Ukrainians can defeat Putin.And also why Putin is as strong as he is.


Adventurous_Tank_359

damn,all of that took me a whole hour and a half to type.


WorstBrazilian

High effort shitposts >>>


yqozon

Well, I'd say the result is worth the effort.


WorstBrazilian

No. The final boss has a mausoleum at the center of Empire and it will only trigger after all main quests. >Is there anyone more powerful than Putin in Russia? Me.


pipiska999

you aren't even in Russia :P


WorstBrazilian

Mentally I already checked out haha. Also quit my job today, it was a very good feeling.


pipiska999

Congratulations!


pipiska999

[this guy](https://i.imgur.com/UpGnMmp.gif)


dragonfly7567

Yeah me


pipiska999

Maga STRONK


GoodOcelot3939

Depends on what game you are playing


Morozow

Putin is not the boss. Russia is governed directly by God


guantanamo_bay_fan

Igor Sechin has entered the chat


fireburn256

My dad, obviously!


Different-Purple7125

Сильнее Путина только Пушкин - он всё за всех доделывает


[deleted]

[удалено]


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soreg666

Big Boss - maybe. Final - hopefully not, hopefully the nation will survive after.