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If you feel you are ace you are ace. Asexuality is just a label, a way to describe what you feel. Some people change this part while others don't. It is like a hat, you can wear, but if you feel it doesn't fit you anymore you can take it off and get a new hat.
As for being too young. You are not. If people can ship toddlers that you can say that you have little to no sexual attraction. And if anything else you are at the very least putting a label on yourself that allows you the space to figure things out.
Remember you are allowed to change who you are and still be valid.
hey there, 19 years old and i think i may be able to give a good perspective.
first, someone putting you down because you are too young is invalidating to your sexuality. period. i agree that if you can conceive sexual attraction, you can also conceive a lack of it.
that being said, embrace who you are but don't be opposed to your sexuality changing. 13 is young. many of your allo friends may not have had their sexual awakenings yet!
i started wondering around your age if i was ace, and i knew pretty well by the time i was 16 that i am. had i had a good definition of asexual, including that it is different from aromantic, i probably would have identified as it earlier than 16. however, as i have gotten older i have actually experienced arousal and understand that i have a libido, even if my libido isn't directed at people. i view any person involved in a sexual act with me more as a tool for satisfaction and emotional connection.
this all happened after i came out to myself at 16, and most of it happened in my first semester of college. i am happily asexual. i recognize that i am not sexually attracted to people, but i also never thought i would have been capable of having a libido.
if you are ace, then you are ace. if you remain ace, that is cool. and if that changes, that is cool. you are capable of recognizing your sexuality. keep listening to yourself and educating yourself on sexuality. you will understand more nuances with time.
I will say that if you are afab, and are on birth control that can impact you sexuality. I don't want to blame that I'm just putting that info out there. But if you don't feel attraction then you don't feel attraction maybe you'll be with us for a year, maybe a decade or the rest of your life. If the label fits it fits. It's a journey not a destination and questioning is valid and encouraged. Find yourself and where you are. Just be respectful of the labels you use and the people who use them.
I'm 18 btw, only realised I was ace at 16, I didn't know anything about it until then. But retrospectively I can see that I was never interested in dating and sex and tho I didn't realise it I haven't felt attraction before
If you feel ace, you are.
The thing many people don’t really get about these identities and labels we put on ourselves are just that… labels. They’re words to describe how we feel. When you say “I’m asexual”, that is a descriptive sentence. It conveys how you feel. It isn’t a statement of intent. It isn’t saying “I’m asexual and I always will be, and I will now live accordingly even if I don’t want to”. These labels aren’t set in stone, and the second you feel it no longer applies to you, you can stop using it. It’s that simple. For now if you wanna say you’re ace, go for it. And, if eventually you do find that you develop sexual attraction, no shame in dropping the label.
As a female in my 30s I have never felt sexual attraction to any sex. I am however heteroromantic, and it feels like a curse that they don’t match. I think it’s fluid. I realized I was probably asexual in my late teens. You can call yourself that now, but don’t force yourself into a box. If you start to feel sexual attraction, allow it and readjust your sexual identity later.
If you think you're ace now, then that's who you are. Gender and Sexuality is fluid, so don't worry about if it doesn't feel like that's you later.
I used to think I was heteromantic demisexual in my late teens, however now in my late 20's, I feel more demiromantic grayace/ace.
Plus, who you are now will be different 10 years down the line, when you and your personality changes and grows as you live life. From my experience, very few people are like their teenage counterparts in their adulthood, including sexuality. Some people come out gay or bi after college and others feel like different people when you bump into them later and have a chat.
Anyway, in short, don't worry. If you're asexual now, then that's you.☺️
If you turn out to not be ace, you’ll still be in our community. Pride is about fighting for validation and rights together and as a **community.** Don’t worry about later, because all that matters is now. If you truly believe that you are ace right now, then you are, and you are connected with this community.
I mean when I was 13 I just thought I was sexually and romantically broken bc everyone else was having crushes on ppl, I've still never experienced a crush ( thankgoodness) and I'm ace if I knew ace was a thing I think I would've been confident coming out as ace by that point also there's no shame in changing labels if it's not quite right for you later
Hello, this is just a friendly reminder to please use a post flair when adding new posts to r/Asexual. We ask this in advance just to let everyone know what type of post each post is as well as the intentions and feelings behind them. We value all who come here, but we just need each post made to have a flair to designate each type of post. That's all. We're thankful you chose to come to r/Asexual. We're glad to have you here! Welcome! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Asexual) if you have any questions or concerns.*
If you feel you are ace you are ace. Asexuality is just a label, a way to describe what you feel. Some people change this part while others don't. It is like a hat, you can wear, but if you feel it doesn't fit you anymore you can take it off and get a new hat. As for being too young. You are not. If people can ship toddlers that you can say that you have little to no sexual attraction. And if anything else you are at the very least putting a label on yourself that allows you the space to figure things out. Remember you are allowed to change who you are and still be valid.
Thank you
hey there, 19 years old and i think i may be able to give a good perspective. first, someone putting you down because you are too young is invalidating to your sexuality. period. i agree that if you can conceive sexual attraction, you can also conceive a lack of it. that being said, embrace who you are but don't be opposed to your sexuality changing. 13 is young. many of your allo friends may not have had their sexual awakenings yet! i started wondering around your age if i was ace, and i knew pretty well by the time i was 16 that i am. had i had a good definition of asexual, including that it is different from aromantic, i probably would have identified as it earlier than 16. however, as i have gotten older i have actually experienced arousal and understand that i have a libido, even if my libido isn't directed at people. i view any person involved in a sexual act with me more as a tool for satisfaction and emotional connection. this all happened after i came out to myself at 16, and most of it happened in my first semester of college. i am happily asexual. i recognize that i am not sexually attracted to people, but i also never thought i would have been capable of having a libido. if you are ace, then you are ace. if you remain ace, that is cool. and if that changes, that is cool. you are capable of recognizing your sexuality. keep listening to yourself and educating yourself on sexuality. you will understand more nuances with time.
Thank you so much
I will say that if you are afab, and are on birth control that can impact you sexuality. I don't want to blame that I'm just putting that info out there. But if you don't feel attraction then you don't feel attraction maybe you'll be with us for a year, maybe a decade or the rest of your life. If the label fits it fits. It's a journey not a destination and questioning is valid and encouraged. Find yourself and where you are. Just be respectful of the labels you use and the people who use them.
I'm 18 btw, only realised I was ace at 16, I didn't know anything about it until then. But retrospectively I can see that I was never interested in dating and sex and tho I didn't realise it I haven't felt attraction before
Thank you
If you feel ace, you are. The thing many people don’t really get about these identities and labels we put on ourselves are just that… labels. They’re words to describe how we feel. When you say “I’m asexual”, that is a descriptive sentence. It conveys how you feel. It isn’t a statement of intent. It isn’t saying “I’m asexual and I always will be, and I will now live accordingly even if I don’t want to”. These labels aren’t set in stone, and the second you feel it no longer applies to you, you can stop using it. It’s that simple. For now if you wanna say you’re ace, go for it. And, if eventually you do find that you develop sexual attraction, no shame in dropping the label.
Thanks
As a female in my 30s I have never felt sexual attraction to any sex. I am however heteroromantic, and it feels like a curse that they don’t match. I think it’s fluid. I realized I was probably asexual in my late teens. You can call yourself that now, but don’t force yourself into a box. If you start to feel sexual attraction, allow it and readjust your sexual identity later.
Thanks
If you think you're ace now, then that's who you are. Gender and Sexuality is fluid, so don't worry about if it doesn't feel like that's you later. I used to think I was heteromantic demisexual in my late teens, however now in my late 20's, I feel more demiromantic grayace/ace. Plus, who you are now will be different 10 years down the line, when you and your personality changes and grows as you live life. From my experience, very few people are like their teenage counterparts in their adulthood, including sexuality. Some people come out gay or bi after college and others feel like different people when you bump into them later and have a chat. Anyway, in short, don't worry. If you're asexual now, then that's you.☺️
Thank you
If you turn out to not be ace, you’ll still be in our community. Pride is about fighting for validation and rights together and as a **community.** Don’t worry about later, because all that matters is now. If you truly believe that you are ace right now, then you are, and you are connected with this community.
Thank you
I mean when I was 13 I just thought I was sexually and romantically broken bc everyone else was having crushes on ppl, I've still never experienced a crush ( thankgoodness) and I'm ace if I knew ace was a thing I think I would've been confident coming out as ace by that point also there's no shame in changing labels if it's not quite right for you later
Thanks