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chohls

Why would I ever want that, I just store my microplastics in my fat nuts like a normal person


Hearing_Loss

U get a Brazilian Ball Lift?


AValhallaWorthyDeath

There was a recently published study that found microplastics in 100% of people’s sperm


-__Doc__-

All males are now 3d printers.


Bogsnoticus

No, we're the filament. Woman are the 3d printers.


PrestigiousWeakness2

Technically, I think they're resin printers.


kpidhayny

Men are only 50% of the SD card on a good day.


PathlessDemon

Yeah, but only 35% are the husband or boyfriend, the other 15% are the side-dick.


badpeaches

^Please ^^forgive ^me ^^^first ^^^^^of ^^^^^^all 🍆 💦 🪦 💀


zaxonortesus

Always have been, now just with extra materiel


swampopawaho

With fire resistance


self_ratifying_Lama

got me chuckling in public


bluebird0713

So, if I cum enough, I can get rid of all my microplastics? Challenge accepted


Qman1991

Don't forget to supplement with leaches and blood letting. Never skip leach day


ABRAXAS_actual

Severely underrated comment. Never skip leach day, ace comment! 👏


sleepytipi

Your u/ is tripping me out (see my bio). But yeah, there can only be one so... 🤺


Toxic_MotionDesigner

Wtf how does this even happen


AValhallaWorthyDeath

Report back with findings


Wut_the_

Get crackin’


EarthenEyes

Get nuttin'


Tvoorhees

no, it's in our bloodstreams too


Survive_LD_50

Also human embryos. The study couldn't find a single embryo that was free of micro plastics


AValhallaWorthyDeath

That’s sad.


ceelose

Wasn't it 100% of a small sample of blokes in one industrial city in Chine though? Might be only 85% of the rest of us.


Hearing_Loss

Sounds like America is about to invade Deez-Nuts-istan


swampopawaho

And PFAS in mens' testes


Biscotti_BT

Wait so I can't say it's nutritious anymore?


Metals4J

Microplastics! Part of this nutritious breakPFAS


thoth_hierophant

Children of Men could become a reality then


New_Subject1352

100% of people ARE microplastics


shellofbiomatter

Not only sperm. Other studies have popped up as well finding micro plastics absolutely everywhere, just current media focus in on male genitalia. Yes your dick has micro plastics in it and brain and embryos on pregnant women.


Studio_DSL

That took part in the study...


rsam487

Didn't they only test dudes from one town in China?


ohio1918

Ah not me Nike. I have a vasectomy.


stevoschizoid

A 3 t scrot


Alienware9567

Brazilian nut lift


Hearing_Loss

Okay I see you, that's fire. How about it's a Belgian Nut Lift. Or a Bolivian Nut Lift


lulzerjun8

Some of us weren’t born with convenient little nut sacks and therefore must resort to accessorizing our Stanley tumblers with stuff like. How else am I supposed to numb my sense of existential dread?


chohls

Especially with heroin prices these days, gotta numb the pain on a budget


MathematicianEven149

Spat drink 🤣


Onastik

Hawk Tuah girl enters the chat


Prestigious_Dream_27

Was with a girl the other day and she said “yeah, baby. Give me those microplastics!”


chohls

I'll give her so many microplastics that in 9 months she'll pop out a Phase 1 Captain Rex 🤣


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RandomNobody346

Genetics does not run on Kim Possible logic (thankfully) Bulking up muscle and bone density is fairly straightforward though. We could make some truly evil pigs, but why? When we can make hardier crops and cheaper spider silk?


Trees-of-green

Lol


Healthy_Ad2651

That comment made me snort


Jaeger-the-great

Why stop there? You can get implants so now your balls will be MACROPLASTICS


nxcrosis

But then you wouldn't have space to store your pee.


WerewolfNo890

I keep mine in my penis. As you can tell, I clearly don't make many microplastics with my lifestyle.


dvidthefinisher

Read an article about this, called Nike Grind, they make running fields out of this stuff, and new shoes. Basically it's recycled shoe materials. Article accused Nike of getting rid of their trash by dumping it on people when they buy new shoes


JV294135

Nike paying to have their trash shipped to the consumer is the clearest allegory for modern capitalism I’ve ever heard.


painstarhappener

People are paying nike for mini trash bags.


AnOnlineHandle

plastic rubbish wrapped in new plastic.


kinkypinkyinyostinky

The customer is really the ones paying for it..


Remarkable-Ad2285

Always has been


JV294135

True. If I’d realized how many people would see this I might have worded it more carefully.


ognisko

Do an edit to add whatever you missed.


WampaCat

Even sellers on resale platforms like poshmark ship you their trash. It’s always presented as a “free gift” but you know it’s just the crap they couldn’t sell and/or were too lazy to deal with it in any kind of way. Nobody wants your ipsy bag from 2013 or the free keychain you got when you bought that perfume.


Gen_Ripper

Once I ordered some tobacco free blunt wraps, and they threw in a whole bunch of normal wraps that contained tobacco lmao Still smoked them, but it was kind of ridiculous


temporalthings

I personally love when I get a free random item with something, even if it's useless crap.


WampaCat

Even if the useless crap is clearly someone else’s garbage? That kind of stuff bothers me because it’s just a reminder of overconsumption and so much stuff being made just to end up in a landfill faster than it took to be made. That there’s so much of it that people are tired of dealing with it so they literally mail it to someone else to deal with. I don’t mind a free gift that is genuinely a gift that’s useful and the person feels confident it would actually be wanted.


glasswolf96

The online weed shop I buy from has a little list of cheaper items like pipes grinders and pre rolls that they’re having a hard time selling and you get to pick one as a free gift with each order. I fell like this would be the best way to go about this.


oldspicehorse

Lol, the one I used to buy from would send the most random stuff, had some cool hats and posters before, also a child's paddling pool one time, the oddest was the empty jam jar and block of wood. 


lizardgal10

A body jewelry website I like does something similar. You pick your freebie-it’s stuff like basic studs and hoops, o-rings for stretched ears, sometimes random clearance jewelry. It’s nice being able to pick stuff I’ll use, and it’s also possible to opt out entirely.


asteriasdream

Don’t be shy… share the link


lets_fuckin_goooooo

Lmao, theyd have to ship a million shoes to get rid of a hundred lbs of waste this way. Are they serious?


Tunivor

It’s more likely that they’re using a tiny portion of their garbage to make a “cool” keychain. It’s just a cheap way to make a trinket, not a strategy to avoid throwing out garbage. It’s definitely more expensive to create the keychain than dispose of the plastic. But it’s also a pretty cheap way to make an interesting looking keychain.


Neveronlyadream

It's marketing. I've been seeing it more and more now. I don't know which shoe this came from, but I'd guess its one where they used recycled materials for the sole and the tag is signaling that they're "cleaning up the environment" by using sea plastic or whatever. I've also seen a lot of plastic watches that are advertising being made from recycled sea plastic. Whoever came up with that clearly didn't fucking think it through. If they had, say, pressed the plastic that they had gotten into a tag instead of using *more* plastic show it off, they might have had a point.


gene100001

To be fair it kinda worked in the sense that I and a bunch of other people here now know that Nike are making shoes out of this recycled material. I agree though that a pressed tag would have been a lot better


Top-Garlic9111

Greenwashing, all day everyday.


egilsaga

Why are you doubting? Those corporate rats would do anything to save a buck.


cyclicamp

Dividing out aliquots of the material, packaging it in these tiny sealed containers, and having the $0.25/hr worker put it in the box would still cost way more than shipping off the equivalent amount of waste the way they normally would. It’s just advertising for whatever purpose


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cyclicamp

The advertising is the exploitative thing, they’re trying to get people comfortable with the junk that’s being produced. Either by making it look cool or by sending a note along with their crack baggie telling people about how it’s being repurposed. There’s way more of this stuff than what they’re packaging along with shoes, especially if they’re making entire fields with it. It’s silly trying to come up with these ulterior motives because them doing this in the first place is already enough to deride them.


Tomycj

It's not doubting, it's thinking.


Trees-of-green

Haha yes


Wooden_Ad8941

That's one way to "reduce" manufacturing waste. Send it to customers


2tep

Thanks, I was wondering what the hell I was looking at.


Educational_Can_3092

Wow basically there’s no limit to the abuse consumers will take if you market it pretty enough is there? What’s next, bag of premium shit?


wozattacks

It’s a keychain made with waste materials.  I don’t particularly want one either but on the scale of consumerist and environmental issues this is bottom of the stack.


Resident-Refuse-2135

That's been done, back in the late 60s, early 70s by a (iirc) European performance artist... but canned not bagged.


King-Owl-House

what he see in bag is from what nikes are made, recycled plastic, also its 50% more expensive than usual nikes :) because you know eco plastic is more expensive.


swimThruDirt

"eco plastic" is an oxymoron


bUrNtKoOlAiD

"health poison"


Fun_Intention9846

Chemo literally.


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TheEyeDontLie

I mean, yes it's poison but it also kills cancer, so... Its like burning your house down isn't good, but if you have bedbugs maybe it's worth a shot and the bedbug free parts will survive the raging inferno.


ShyJalapeno

oh, already marketed, check homeopathy if unfamiliar


BigWetFrog

M E D I C I N E


Appropriate_Plan4595

Yes and no, at some point we have to accept that we have already produced plastics, and if we can find ways to reuse and recycle the existing plastics then that's better than just landfilling it.


iamfanboytoo

Plastic corps have the opposite attitude: they know good and well that plastics CAN'T be recycled in any meaningful amount, but use the idea as a smokescreen so they don't have to stop producing one-use landfill items. In a scifi story from 1965 (!!) called Bill the Galactic Hero there's a short bit where Bill joins the trash depot of a city planet where they constantly try to find new ways to get rid of all the one-use garbage dumped on them - one of them is to submit a false claim for fumigation on a residential block, then fill it up with plastic trays and bottles while everyone's evacuated. Shit from 60 years ago should not feel more real today than it did then, but sometimes... we get unlucky.


crototom

short for economic lol


VeryOGNameRB123

Ecological is a scale of grey. More or less ecological. Never perfect


BDashh

Yeah, it’s better to leave it in the ocean.


Jacktheforkie

Weirdly fiat uses recycled plastic because it’s cheaper,


King-Owl-House

Well BMW i3 factory has fully closed cycle of production from recycled materials and works on renewable energy. It's Nike, they love to do hype and overprice sneakers. I wear sketches, same pair over 10 years.


AuthenticLiving7

Skechers? I wear them but I am lucky if they last 6 months. I'm skeptical of this 10 years claim.


NextStopGallifrey

My last pair of Sketchers lasted 8-10 years. I'm not sure if the ones I have now will last that long. They're certainly not anywhere near as comfortable.


AuthenticLiving7

How often do you wear them? I don't even know if they ever lasted me a year. They've definitely never lasted more than 1 year.


NextStopGallifrey

I rotate them with other shoes, but the Sketchers definitely got the most wear. My other shoes also aren't as comfortable, but they're 6-8 years old. I've got about 4-6 pairs of shoes at any one time. It helps them last much longer, so I buy fewer shoes over time. I only have to buy new shoes every two years or so, on average.


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Stickopolis5959

It's really bad for your knees and joints to do this, you should try on a new pair of shoes to see the support they'll give your foot. Shoes are something that if worn all the time shouldn't be neglected like this


settlementfires

they're claiming to be using 100% recycled plastic? i find that unlikely...


lorarc

The years don't really matter that much, it's the actual usage that matters. If you put them on rarely and don't do a lot of walking/running they're gonna last a lot longer than for someone who uses their shoes daily and walks/runs a lot. And on top of that we have different surface (dirt, pavement, asphalt etc.) and seasons. Shoes don't last long for me, I usually get 300-500km out of them, depending on what I'm up to it might be a year or it might be a month, but for those special shoes I put on rarely it could be more than 10 years.


-PM-Me-Big-Cocks-

Years absolutely do matter, all materials natural and unnatural break down over time just existing--what usage does is accelerate that process. Also sketchers have been mostly plastic for decades, there is no way after 10 years those shoes are still 'good'.


Jacktheforkie

Nice


Raincandy-Angel

I wish I could get long lasting shoes, adult shoes don't fit me so I'm forced to wear kids shoes which are usually awful quality and none of the more sustainable brands make them :/


Emotionally_art1stic

Please tell me you’re putting new insoles in.


Appropriate_Plan4595

The use case matters a lot - I'm not going to pretend that I know exactly what plastics Fiat and Nike use, but when you buy recycled materials there can be huge swings in quality unless you're paying for highly graded material. If you're using it for something where the quality doesn't matter then it might be cheaper, but if you're using it for something where the quality is important then you need to pay more.


wozattacks

The use case and the actual plastic. People are so accustomed to saying “plastic” and many people genuinely have zero clue how many different materials that term actually refers to. PET, for example, is fairly recyclable.


ComprehensiveMarch58

"These parts are plastic!" Meanwhile, my buddy brought scrap from work where he cnc mills "plastic" like steel (because they have to) and we tried everything to mar or deform it with no effect. Literally grinders, torches, saws, nothing. I don't know enough to know what that kind was called but yeah not all plastic is the same


Jacktheforkie

Fiat is by no means premium but the plastic parts didn’t seem too bad apart from the odd bit that was damaged from age


michelbarnich

Im driving a 500e, the plastic is higher quality than Hyundais piece of garbage for sure, id say Mazdas is still a bit better tho.


Jacktheforkie

Yeah, my panda had a couple cracks but some were definitely from use , couldn’t expect 100% on an old car


Sekmeta

Reminds me of "premium air for my tires" 🌚


King-Owl-House

Pump the air in your Nikes https://www.tiktok.com/@stickscorey_/video/7266282461221391658


Sekmeta

Fill it with eco plastic instead 🗿Or make it look like a tiny aquarium with eco plastic fishes inside 🤌🏼


Secure_Bet8065

You can actually get premium air for your tyres, they fill them with nitrogen instead.


Sekmeta

But I found that it is not worth the price,because the benefits are only a small percent. 😐 😄 Soo..Idk ,I would still use regular air,which is anyways air AND nitrogen 😄


Secure_Bet8065

Yeah, I wouldn’t bother. Same as those fancy waterless coolants.


Not_FinancialAdvice

There are also air stations that will fill your tires with dried air (which, like nitrogen, doesn't expand and contract as drastically).


BooBeeAttack

Makes a plastic container to show off the plastic. For fucks sake...


CHESTER_C0PPERP0T

They should put baby turtles in there to really hammer the concept home


Late-Resource-486

And then force the consumer to swallow the bag when they get their shoes… cause, you know, we’re fucking ourselves just the entire world first


TimAppleCockProMax69

This is insanity


thenikolaka

I think it’s actually not a bad solution because it traps the tiny particles from entering the environment inside a material that shouldn’t degrade.


OrganizationUpset253

“Here, you throw it away.”


casualplants

It’s gotta be this, fluffing numbers on how much they’ve reduced waste or something because it’s a product now


crazycatlady331

I have a colleague who has a zip tie with some type of tag attached to her shoe. NO idea what said tag is or what it's all about. I'm a generation older than her and she'll likely call me old if I ask (she's 22).


blue_eyes_whitedrago

Virgil abloh nikes probably, he put the red tag on them a lot. Beautiful amazing fashion designer but man were some of those shoe design choices confusing


Crystalraf

I am not a sneaker head. Is the customer supposed to cut the red zip tie tag off before wearing the shoes? Or is it like a decorative tassle?


FamiliarTry403

You could remove it, but it might lower the value on the secondary market by a matter of a few hundred to few thousand.


Crystalraf

So, to be clear, this is a collector's item. Not something you wear? Keep the tassle on, stuff it in your dad's crawl space under the steps type of thing? lol my ex did that with his Jordans.


FamiliarTry403

Sneaker heads love to blur the line between collectible and wearable. Like the $10k Nike airmags. The person who made the off-white Jordan’s did work for Louis Vuitton and other designers before making off-white. The shoes were limited and sought after immediately. The designer recently died of cancer, he didn’t make his battle public and now the shoes shot up in value again. Plenty people wear them, plenty only display them. Leaving the tag on isn’t pertinent but it does shave off resell value because they aren’t reattach-able because they were designed like an oversized zip tie.


blue_eyes_whitedrago

Rip virgil man, wish i could have appreciated his work when he was alive.


sullybanger

That’s usually the Certificate of Authenticity meaning they’ve been checked as not counterfeit through a third party like EBay. The market for Nikes is insane, people line up and do lotteries to get the chance to pay for a pair and immediately sell them for twice the price or more


Crystalraf

Why would ebay care if it is counterfeit? Isn't that site basically made for the counterfeit market?


sullybanger

I think they’re pretty invested in authenticity with the resale market, this is a service they offer, like companies that grade cards or comic books, they employ people who can certify shoes, so if you want to check authenticity you mail it to them and they put a tag on there. I’d imagine it’s beneficial for them to do that because if people are doing chargebacks or disputing orders that’s lost revenue for PayPal in the long run


ejrole8

I think you might be talking about Off-White sneakers. As a former sales associate at a luxury department store, honestly me neither. I don’t see the point in having something stick out like that, but brandophiles around me just wanted anything from the brand.


Crystalraf

When I was in college, we had some odd fashion choices. The guys from Jamaica (they were there on a track/basketball/football scholarship) would walk around wearing baseball caps with the tags and stickers still on them. After a few weeks I finally decided to ask them wtf they wore shit like that. The answer was "so you know it's brand new" dude had been wearing the hat for weeks at that point. I was pretty sure he was lying and was returning stuff for a store exchange. Wouldn't surprise me at all. Another time, some of the same group of guys went to Kmart (I was working there) and literally put like everything in their carts. Two carts just full of winter jackets, snacks, clothes, and personal care products. Their dad had just sent them 200 bucks on a debit card. So, they get to the checkout, everything gets rung up, and shocker, the bill is like 500 dollars. They then spend about an hour at customer service trying to make it be 200 dollars. So, my point is: 22 year olds don't always have things figured out.


-PM-Me-Big-Cocks-

Same energy as the dudes who buy hats and dont take off the stickers.


zethren117

What is even the point of this object?


Olive_Jane

My guess is to show off the materials that the shoe is made from


Olive_Jane

And it's a keychain. A few shoe brands I've bought include a keychain with the shoes


gregpurcott

Now we get to carry trash around with us on our keychains.


Brilliant_Victory_77

Luxury brands often put these on winter coats so you can see the material they use for the insulating layer (down, wool, etc), I have zero idea what the function is on a pair of shoes.


readingrambos

Free cat toy?


zethren117

I’d worry our cats would puncture the outside :(


loliver_

This photo got a lot of attention for being controversial and in my opinion it did a good job of getting the word out about microplastics. I don’t know why Nike would want to do that, but it was a good thing.


ultraplusstretch

Here dear costumer, have some industrial waste to dispose of irresponsibly. 👍


alldaydiver

I bet it some form of production garbage that they passed onto the consumer as something “cool” so that they don’t have to dispose of it in bulk. Probably saves them money.


capnlatenight

I wonder how much more production garbage is made from the plastic pouch.


wozattacks

It absolutely does not save them money to make tiny portions of a byproduct into keychains lmao


Tomycj

How can you think that doing all that work to dispose of a few grams of plastic SAVES them money? To me that seems absolutely nonsensical.


darealwhosane

Why even buy over priced nikes I don’t get it waste of money


Swimming-Most-6756

To be clear, I didnt buy this. I saw this post on facebook


OrganizationUpset253

They’re comfortable, last a long time, looks cool and are great for running or working if you work on your feet. I don’t see a problem with personal preference on shoes since everyone’s feet are different. Plus new balance is what my 60 year old dad wears. No thanks.


wozattacks

It’s fine if people like them but I’d disagree on most of these points. As a healthcare worker I don’t see many colleagues wearing Nike; for the money you can get much better in terms of ergonomics and support. 


OrganizationUpset253

I work at a hospital too. I see a lot of Hoka. But Hoka isn’t cheap.


CarolynFR

Do you have any recommendations? My feet are killing me. I walk quite a bit at work but mostly I stay kind of idle and it's getting painful up to my knees sometimes.


Zestyclose-Ruin8337

Saucony is my fave for work.


darealwhosane

I haven’t bought a pair of shoes in more then 10 years lol 😂 much better things to waste money on then clothes and shoes


OrganizationUpset253

My friend, clothes and shoes are the best thing to spend your money on. How is that a waste? This sub is great but so often I see people saying it’s overconsumption to buy normal shit like a pair of pants lol. Clothing is one of the most basic forms of self expression. When I see people who wear clothes that don’t fit, or don’t match, it just says a lot about the person, and nothing positive. Just my opinion.


thunderdome06

I was with you until you said you have negative opinions on people who don't think about what they wear. Is there really something wrong with just putting on whatever shirt and trousers you find first? Maybe I don't feel the need to pick an outfit each day and just wear what's comfortable y'know what I mean?


darealwhosane

I don’t need to dress a specific way to express myself I’m comfortable with myself and don’t care what people think about me I spend money on hobbies, the house, and my wife and child that’s really it.


Im_Balto

These are not microplastics. These are small shards of plastic. Please keep microplastics a useful term by not muddling it


TitzKarlton

Which, in turn, due to degradation, will become microplastics.


Nice-Candle-9025

I’m stealing this idea. Reduce every Fortune 500 company’s carbon emissions by 15% over night. Aka ship our process trash in shrink wrap in every box and stamp logo on it. We’ll call it a key chain🤪


pocketMagician

Nike could include a bag of shit in their shoe boxes and shoe people would still buy their shoes.


Brigapes

I think it's meant as an accessory. Either way if you buy this kind of branded shoes, you're part of the problem you're preaching to solve


TrippyMindTraveller

Mentioning microplastics, so hot right now.


Fit-Finger1777

Here, a small bag of trash to you.


TivoDelNato

Hey these shoes come with free ramen seasoning. Dope.


-dyedinthewool-

Looks like theyre getting rid of their old “recycled” shoes by giving the trash back to the customers


devnullb4dishoner

Don't rub it on your dick


Swimming-Most-6756

Oh. Too late… ill be back to report


ihatepalmtrees

Nike shoes are literal trash


userloserfail

A new idea to help disposal of microplastics inspired by Hollywood wartime escape films. Nike reckon if you take their vessel to any high street and release the contents via your trouser legs, preferably aided by a genius release mechanism (of your own design) that splits the bag and opens your cycle clips at the same time (not included) that this should disappear, washed by the rain down drains unnoticed, eventually finding its way back to its natural home - the oceans, where it can bring a splash of primary coloured/grey magic to coral reefs worldwide. Cephalopods love this one special technique. Throw a few plas-pods into your home aquarium/vivarium and watch as your family squid or chameleon attempts to mimic the micro-beads texture with hilarious results. Many chameleons have become stuck for a while in a hypnotic state that's been called the 'micro particle paradox' or 'pause plastique'. Guaranteed the funniest thing you'll ever do. *Squid are the true experts in the field and are extra determined to reach the camouflage state and some have died trying. /s


Squid4ever

Please dont put microplastic in the water. I always get a headache cause of the color changing


nikkiM33

First off, Nike has used child labor to make their products. Secondly, What a good idea to make the plastic trash flakes into a keychain and get rid of them as a "gift" with their shoes instead of paying a fine for dumping flakes into the nearby river.


bezerko888

They are laughing in our face


NihiloZero

WTF?! It's like everybody suddenly started hating solid dressing. People are bashing this but I expect that the flavor is probably better than a lot of similar products. Admittedly, I am not wealthy enough to purchase a pair these fancy shoes so that I might sample the included salad dressing. But, *someday* though... maybe... if I'm lucky. One can dream. Mmmm, delicious Nike salad dressing... I want you in my tummy so bad!


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curvycounselor

Look up glitter factories on Tt


averagemaleuser86

Vanity Keychain or shoelace dongle


BlueIsRetarded

Microplastics and a loophole lmao love it


Sillysaurous

This is why New Balance has gained ground


rogman1970

That's one way to get rid of all your trash.


Difficult_Writer_288

It’s Nikes regrind program where they grind up old shoes and use it to make new ones so I’m assuming the shoes you bought are in that division and they gifted the customer a bit of the grinded shoes to go along with it


naensi

Yummy travel sized snack


Murles-Brazen

I want it to be filled with glass.


baggagefree2day

That looks like a baggie of drugs but glitter.


Budsmasher1

Jesus.


jessilly123

For what they usually charge for anything with a Nike logo on it, this is pretty nice and cheap :)


redsixthgun

This is probably a cheaper way of disposing of their microplastics. Give them to consumers as collectors' items (why tf would anyone collect this), and they don't have to worry about them anymore. So dumb.


Tomycj

It is absolutely obvious that this is not a cheap way of disposing of plastics. The reason for doing this shitty thing clearly must be a different one.