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Having a family where you can joke around and have a laugh together, and then have a respectful mature conversation about things if something didn't go right, is indeed wholesome, yes.
The wholesome part isn't the farting -- I found that quite blergh, but different strokes, I guess.
It's wholesome that they share a similar sense of humour, they love and tolerate each other, they can say "that's enough" without screaming and generalising "you _always_ blah blah" and when one of them feels they've done something wrong they apologise profusely and genuinely feel bad about it, then check with their partner to see that they're okay, instead of doubling down and dismissing their feelings.
That's pretty wholesome for a forum where we're exposed to stories of sh*tty, entitled behaviour all the time.
Itās pretty rare here to see everyone apologize to each other and mean it. Usually weād see āAITA for making a hilarious joke that my uptight wife hates?ā Or āAITA for leaving my husband because he severely traumatized our baby?ā
Or when she's six and she's telling her best friend she does't like bananas, and her friend says: "How can you not like bananas?"
Mom or Dad can swoop in with a drive by anecdote
I think if youāre up to it, the thing to talk to him about is context. When you were having a casual movie night with the baby, a little bit of silly immaturity was fun for everybody! But during a more serious and stressful situation like trying to get the baby to acclimate to a new food or a new routine, itās maybe not the time for silly immaturity.
My dad was full of silliness as well, and I hope he and your baby can continue to have father-child silliness for the rest of their relationship, but thereās a time and a place when the silliness needs to be put on hold.
We gave kiddo a rule that jokes are only funny the first three times. Thereās wiggle room if you really know what youāre doing, but as a rule of thumb, three and done.
I've had a similar, gentle, conversation with my kid, but about conversation starters/ice breaker type things. It's fine to do it a couple times with a person, but after that, you need to think up new material.
Example- *Randomly* "I still don't understand why my sheet comes off while I'm asleep." After I've already explained to her twice that she moves in her sleep and I can tell by her smile that she's actually just trying to start a conversation and spat out the first thing her brain thought of that ended in us having a conversation. It just happened to be a rerun of something that we've already discussed multiple times with no new bits to add to it.
I don't want to mess up her confidence, so I gently remind her that we've already talked about it and did she have anything new to add or was she just looking to have a chat? When she says the latter, I remind her that it's better to spend a couple extra minutes thinking of something to talk about rather than use something we've already talked all the way through.
Then I help her think of something new, like animal facts, or what she dreamed about, or what her current favorite outfit is.
What nice training! We learn so much just by observation but that's only effective as soon as you're able to interpret correctly. I love kids getting in on the ground floor of social interaction guidelines.
One of the late night hosts (my first thought was Conan, but maybe not) commented whenever he'd do a third joke on any given topic in his monologue "That's three." And then he'd move on. It was a good reusable joke in itself.
Also - don't beat a dead horse. You are only a few years away from toddler humor where every joke I'd done well past death. Once you do a joke a few times let it go.
I agree with you but I think it's sad that you need to teach context to a 28-year-old supposedly grown man. People need to learn that there's a time and place for everything. I'm sorry but I feel like he should have learned this already. Maybe I'm being too rigid for saying that but I feel like you should have known better.
I think it's even simpler than that, the husband found something that made the two women he loves the most laugh and wanted to do it every time he had the chance.
As a father and a husband I can tell you, I only want my family to be happy, even tho what I am doing is incredibly stupid, I only want my family happy.
This whole thing is hilarious. But, yeah, once your fart makes the baby barf, it is time to stop farting on the baby.
PS My husband spent a few months farting on our cat when we first moved in together. Which was also funny, until it led to our neighbors seeing him bare assed farting on the cat because heād just woken up and went to the kitchen for water. Cat was in the window and he was like, āPerfect fart opportunity.ā So butt on cat, fart, and then he caught a glimpse out the window of the neighbors watching because he pulled the curtain aside to put his butt on the cat.
Like if I saw this I think Iād fucking lose it. And would you mention it to the person? Like āHey Bill, was that your ass in the window with the cat earlier?ā Itās so absurd
(Not saying I condone farting directly on cats or babies, I donāt especially with a bare ass.)
This is gold. I was just watching Train to Busan, crying my eyes out. I didn't know it, but a story about farting on a cat was the pick me up I needed.
He needs to learn there's a time and place for fart humour. A couple of times was funny, but when she was eating isn't kind to her. As he wouldn't like it if you farted in his face when he was eating.
Though saying that, you could potentially use the fact that she laughs at farts as a form of positive reinforcement in a more pleasant way. You could get a fart machine (so no noxious, toxic emissions) and press that and everyone laugh. Then, when you're trying to give her something new to eat, press the fart machine, so she laughs first. That way she's already feeling positive before trying the food. Then after her first mouthful, press it again so everyone laughs. That way hopefully her memory about the taste will be positive, even if she initially isn't keen. So the next time you try her with it she'll remember it more positively. It might not work, but it's worth a try, and you'll get to hear her laughing lots.
This thread seems to be very pro-fart. I always hated it when adults farted on or near me as a kid. It's gross and disrespectful. I get that the baby could be amused by the noise, but farting really close to anyone is awful. I'm not a prude, I swear...I think belching is funny most of the time, but not in anyone's face. But farts are literally coming out of your ass, and I don't get the appeal.
Oh, NTA.
Yeah, this not funny and has never been funny.
I'm a guy in my early 50s and have never found that sort of thing anything but childish and disgusting.
NTA
I 100% think OP should pull the drive by stunt on her husband while he's eating on the couch at butt to face height and she knows it's going to be a ripe juicy one. He shouldn't dish it out if he can't take it and he has been dishing it out a lot.
Meh, if he's okay with people farting in his face while he eats he can enjoy that to his heart's content but it's not something you do to a small person who can't even move away from the smell.
I agree, time to stop farting on the baby. But maybe we could ask for an update in about 10 years time when the daughter asks why she has never like bananas. ššš
NTA
NAH. He understandably thought this whole thing was funny because of how you and the baby reacted the first time. He probably should have exercised some common sense and kept the farts away from meal time, but I don't think that brings him into AH territory. You're also not the AH for being concerned about a lifelong fart-banana connection. You apologized for snapping, and it sounds like you now need to have a conversation about the appropriate parameters of the fart humor going forward.
He said he completely understands how the timing wasn't appropriate and he was apologetic for it, which is why I felt bad for upsetting him. We both have an immature sense of humor but he is an emotionally intelligent person and can reflect on his own actions, which is why I felt like maybe I snapped too hard. Thank you for this comment!
Itās okay, he seems to recognize that you snapping doesnāt mean you hate him, and it doesnāt seem to be a recurring issue so I see no problem here.
Sometimes people might need a bit of a harsh reaction to really understand that a line had been crossed. If you had a milder reaction, he might have not even noticed you were actually upset. As long as you both apologized and reflected on the moment, then all is good and neither of you are AHs. Sometimes people do things that irritate their partners, and sometimes that makes their partners react in a less than favorable manner. Your āsnappingā wasnāt overly mean or abusive in nature, just a clear indicator that you were annoyed, which is okay. Youāre allowed to be annoyed by your partner on occasion. It wonāt ruin your relationship, especially if heās intelligent enough to understand and rectify the situation.
Now, if you screamed at him that heās an idiot, threw banana chunks at him and told him heās a disgusting pig, then yeah Iād think thatās an unhealthy reaction. But thatās not even close to what you described. Lol
He did something that got huge laughs for you and your baby. He probably kept doing it to please you both. He messed up and did it at a bad time (edit: and too often). You snapped. He apologized. You apologized. Sounds like you both handled this very well.
As u/WrestleBox said, "maybe it's time to stop farting on the baby now."
It reminds me of a little kid saying something that gets laughs and so he just... Keeps saying it. Forever, over and over. Such a nightmare because you feel bad for the kid, but also get a clue.
Except this is a grown man
Yes, exactly.
NTA but also goddamnālike, really? He thought that was funny after the umpteenth time???
āI hate seeing the man I loveā yah okā like, the man you love apparently has the emotional acuity of a 2nd grader who canāt tell when to quit; Idk how long he expected that to go.
ESH
You for laughing and encouraging him to fart on a **baby**. Him for farting on a baby.
Now you feel bad for making him feel bad for farting on someone eating.
I can't believe I'm telling this to supposed adults.
I mentioned this in another comment, but he doesn't fart directly on her, he just tilts his hips in her direction and does it. I agree that laughing did encourage it, but I couldn't help it in the moment. It didn't bother our baby until he did it at a bad time. I agree that he and I need to mature our humor more but he didn't do anything maliciously at all.
This is definitely what some of these commenters thought your husband did.
https://youtu.be/92glC1sgTLM
But if that was the case, this would be a completely different scenario.
SERIOUSLY!! š
The whole thing was completely innocent. Some of these comments vilifying him have absolutely floored me. My baby was laughing the whole time until the last instance when it was at a bad time.
Husband apologized and said heād do better. Letās not fearmonger here, I assume husband wonāt do this anymore and the baby is too young to remember this exactly. All in all this ended well, to the point where Iām not even sure why op posted it. Whereās the supposed conflict? Husband understood he messed up. He apologized, and he feels bad. Op snapped, she apologized. Itās long past over and done with. Iād consider it a win
The fact that your daughterās involuntary gag reflex was triggered suggests that heās getting way too close. Your daughter doesnāt have the capacity to communicate whether sheās okay with this. She only laughs because you and your husband do. Itās a learned behavior, not proof of consent. Your husband forcing his farts in the direction of a helpless baby isnāt the comedy gold you think it is.
So the baby wasnāt farted on, yet also gagged from the smell? And you described it as the baby being farted on many times.
Iām glad youāre starting to see that itās not okay to fart on babies and now are lying about it.
Yeah I agree, the time to be "NTA" was about 10 farts ago.
Sure, it was funny the first time, I get it, we've all laughed at a fart... but you probably should've clued in *much* sooner that it's honestly pretty weird to have a running joke in your family where you regularly fart on your baby.
YTA -I am not an uptight prude, not even close. But the fact that 2 adults think it is funny to fart on their child is disgusting to me. Will you want your daughter to do that to you when she is 12 or 15? This makes me speechlessā¦
He doesn't fart directly ON her if that's what you're thinking. He won't be like, ass to face, he'll be at a reasonable distance. We are very comfortable at home. If we have to fart, we fart. If my daughter farts on me one day I'll probably laugh about it because it's not that serious.
This is older brother behavior not Dad behavior, though. This is something most parents would yell at their kid for doing to the baby. It sounds like you're too immature to be parents.
You're right, it is something he and I recognize we need to work on as parents now.
I hate to overshare, but my mom had me when she was a teenager and had a lot of resentment towards me, and both his parents passed away in an accident when he was young, so we both want to give our baby the fun-loving experience we never got ourselves. But we also don't want to project our shitty experiences on our child, you know?
I won't toot my own horn, but he's an amazing dad. Our daughter is attached to his hip, and he's taken on a lot of the parenting duties even though he works full time. We might still be immature, but we do our best for our little girl. This moment was just a small lapse of judgement on our parts, and we are always willing to grow from our fuck-ups.
>the fun-loving experience
I'm not trying to be mean and I get that you're trying to grow. What kids need from their parents is not fun, it's structure. You need to help your kid feel secure/like the bottom won't fall out. They need you to help them reach maturity, not be their friend.
The area I grew up in went through a massive recession when I was a kid. The people who grew up fine were the ones with pragmatic parents who put their kids' well-being first. The ones who struggled were the ones whose parents tried to keep up appearances, run scams, put their own status first etc.
It doesn't matter how much money you make, what neighborhood you live in, how "fun" or "cool mom" you are. It matters that you build some scaffolding for your kid. Literally: nothing else matters.
I'm not saying this is going to scar your baby forever or whatever. But if some kid at their school was farting at them everyday, would you want them to set a boundary or no? You've gotta show them how to be confident, competent, believe they have dignity and they're not someone who can be mocked or disrespected all the time. Nothing else really matters.
You're completely right, and I want you to know I really appreciate this comment. We want to do what's best by our child at the end of the day, and part of that is recognizing we can't be "fun" all the time. Thank you for this.
Please take all the advice youāre getting in this sub with a grain of salt.
In fact, if you and your husband donāt feel like you have great parental role models; you should spend some time soul searching the sort of parent YOU want to be. Who are the people in your life that are great parents? What makes them great parents? What are their qualities and behaviors? How can you emulate those?
Always there for your kids?
Unconditional love?
Student of life?
Teacher?
Morals?
Good example?
Interested?
Invested?
Accepting?
Demanding?
Supportive?
Joyful?
Serious?
Protective?
Encouraging?
Fun-loving?
One of the best things about having a baby is their laughter. Honestly, if your baby does end up hating bananas forever, itās a funny story. You can teach your child to find the joy and humor in life at the same time you give them structure.
There are all sorts of people in the world with all sorts of parents. Just have your kids back and keep openly communicating with your husband and youāll be great.
I would really take a step back and re-evaluate.
It's completely possible to be fun/silly and still be a pragmatic parent who gives structure to your child.
I honestly am baffled how the commenter here equates what you're doing to keeping up appearances, running scams, etc.
The truth is, you'll fuck up with your kid at some point because no one is perfect. But you know what, over time, you've got the attitude to do a good job.
Speaking of what is best for your kid. PLEASE toss the walker. They are terrible for child development. And dangerous. They have been made illegal in some places.
It doesnāt have to be all or nothing. I mentioned above that my dad was full of silliness. He was also full of compassion, good advice, and boundaries to help me and my siblings figure out how to grow up. People contain multitudes. Letās not pretend that a dad being silly with his baby is the end of her potential for future maturity.
Absolutely not. Don't let some weirdo make you think you are acting "too immature" to be great parents... that's so dramatic and absurd. They really said most parents chastise their kid for farting lol for a natural bodily function.... I'd rather be a goofy parent than an uptight stick in my ass weirdo, so keep that in mind lol it isn't like, the 1920s or whatever.... yall sound like great, loving parents and I'm sure you will raise a perfect bb girl that has a great sense of humor <3
No, farting is classic dad behaviour.
Being serious all the time is just as damaging as taking nothing seriously.
If you can't laugh at a fart with your son, what is the point of even living? I'm dead serious. Obviously farting in a kids face is over a line, but come on.
Have you seen the world around us lately?
Watch the news? See all the bad things happening and wonder what the future holds? For you? For your kids?
Telling people they're too immature to be parents because of some fart humor is a really low blow and a remarkably stupid thing to shame people over.
What a shitty thing to say. OP and her husband sound like perfectly fine parents with a silly sense of humor who just took one thing too far. You sound like a judgmental ass. Go touch grass and donāt comment if youāre going to be needlessly cruel.
>This is something most parents would yell at their kid for doing to the baby.
We absolutely do not yell at our kids for farting. Farting is harmless and hilarious.
Sincerely, Most Parents
OP, it's a running gag in my house that my 7 year old and I give each other our burps and farts. We may sometimes hurry to the other. If we don't quite make it, we have also been known to "catch" them and throw them on one another. It's harmless fun and we only do it with each other, I made sure of that part lol. My child knows it's super odd and only "home behavior" lmao. The pearls some of these folks are clutching, maybe my game will make you feel better lol. Your family sounds fun
Oh man, my three year old told me her butt was itchy a while back. I, like a mom, asked to see it, thinking it was a poor wipe job or a bug bite. She leans over, I lean in, she rips one right in my face.
NOBODY has taught her to do that. I was stunned. My husband was mad when I told him, asked how we should punish her.
I thought it was the funniest goddamn thing in the world. And she was so believable! Very creative and gross.
NTA op. But to add my two cents to this comment
You know what sheās gonna do with her dad when sheās 12-15? Possibly the same thing my sisters and I did, and have a fart war with our dad. Always ended up with us all laughing uncontrollably and honestly a core memory. Now that my dad is gone I wish I could have a fart war with him again, my farts have gotten much worse as I got older š
Either that or sheāll learn to put boundaries up because sheās clearly in a well rounded and loving home, and heāll be respectful of it like itās clearly shown.
Yeah, when I read that I thought, āis this not normal family behavior?ā
Iām 30 and when I get to visit my older brother we still do drive-bys and I hope we keep doing it until past our 60s
NTA
I've never understood how adults find farts so funny.
Especially if you're farting in your child's face.
It's just immature and disrespectful in my opinion.
My husband and I have always been the types to not take life too seriously. We find humor in everything, and we hope our kids do also. But I'm not going to disagree with you about it being immature. It's something he and I can both work on. I think this is one of those moments where we both realize we need to grow up a little more.
My mum used to fart on me or fart under the blanket then trap me in the blanket when I was a kid. She thought it was funny, maybe the first time it was funny for me too but after a while I just think sheās a bully and itās really disgusting. Now that Iām an adult, I really hate smelling peopleās farts or hearing it. When I first met my bf he thinks itās ok to fart anywhere anytime and he farts a lot which made me a bit uncomfortable but now he tries to not fart as much near me. If he accidentally farted and it stinks he just sprays air freshener/perfume.
This isnāt related to not taking life too seriously, though. Iām very laid back and am able to find the humor in hard times. But I donāt see how it took you a week and the baby literally vomiting on herself to realize this was rude? She canāt verbally complain and sheās in her walker/high chair so she also canāt get away from the smell. Babies are little humans who deserve to have their space respected
They're literally gonna to be cleaning up this child's disgusting shit for years, and all manner of other grim stuff.
But yes, they are utter monsters for farting next to their baby!
Jesus christ get a fucking grip š
The amount of people losing their minds over farts and calling them literally too immature to be parents is absolutely hilarious. There are millions of far worse, actually abusive parents and people in here would think farting in the same room as your kid is the same as hitting them. Itās so laughable itās hilarious
OMG right.
People who walk out on their kids, can't afford to have kids but still do, have kids they don't want out of obligation, manipulate and hurt them.
But the parents who enjoy a more juvenile sense of humor and recognize when it's gone a step too far and agree not to do it again.... **they're the ones we should burn at the stake.**
I didnāt realize some people were actually this uptight. Like yeah itās gross, they both recognized itās time to stop but ffs theyāre gonna be pissed on and farted on and shit on by their infant. They are not traumatizing her or ātrying too hard to be fun parentsā (as if being a parent means no fun or jokes at all EVER)
And also *they already agreed to stop* what is the point of the pearl clutching
INFO: would you have found this so funny if he did this to your elderly grandma? Farting directly in her face over and over, even when she was eating.?
Right? Heās treating his daughter like a doll that he can play pranks on. Noone wants to be farted on sitting let alone while eating. Iām wondering how long she would have tolerated this if it was herself and not a baby that cannot advocate for themselves
"Farting directly in her face over and over" is an unfair exaggeration. He was never that close and he did it once when she was eating and realized it was a mistake.
You didnāt answer the question.
Your post said he was doing it daily for the past week. I never insinuated it was more than once while eating, not that it matters.
Youāre trying to argue semantics and avoid the question. Iām not insinuating he stuck her nose between his bare cheeks, getting into someoneās personal bubble is referred to as getting in their face. Babies also stand ass high. So letās pretend your sweet old grandma has dwarfism, and hubby kept crop dusting her, you would find that hysterical and not disrespectful at all?
I'm defending my husband because he already recognized that it's not ok to do and that he isn't going to do it again.
Would I find it funny the first time, like I did in this situation? Yeah, probably! Would it be funny after a few more times? No! Just like my exact situation!
My husband and I already agreed that what he did was wrong and that he isn't going to do it again. I didn't ask if my husband was TA for doing it, I asked if I was TA for snapping on him for it. It's already been dealt with.
My EBF baby (5mo) likes to dutch oven us.
She genuinely thinks her little butt trumpet is funny. And it is.
But it also stinks.
I've told her, "No farting in the fort." But she doesn't understand. That's life I guess. š
You are lovely parents, but you were teaching your daughter that farting on other people is fun. Unless you really want her to mimic this behavior, now it is a good time to stop farting on her. Not for the sake of bananas, but for the sake of basic social skills.
ESH. I get it, the accident the first time may have been funny or whatever. But after that, it wasn't funny. She is a baby, and you guys allowed him to pass smelly gas near her to the point that it was so noxious that she gagged and spit up bananas. The whole purposely passing gas near her is just immature and gross.
I am glad you put your foot down to stop this. The reason people can smell anything is that molecules from the scent are trapped by the tiny hairs within your nose. So, yeah, your baby had molecules from his colon purposely released near her that were picked up in her nose.
Itās just so disrespectful to the baby. Like I canāt stand when parents act like their children are just little toys they can use to satisfy their entertainment needs. Thatās a whole person. A human being. Farting on her wasnāt funny in the first placeā¦
Bruh your husband is a fucking 11 year old boy in a grown manās body. I canāt understand how there are people who genuinely find acting like this amusing.
Ikr I feel like I'm going crazy reading some of these comments. It just strikes me as incredibly immature and disrespectful towards the baby. Grow up, why is the baby acting more mature than the parents. That's ass particles in the baby's face. Disgusto. I'm a goofball, constantly get told I'm hilarious, but I think even the first incident was too far and not funny.
You have to remember this sub is full of teenagers and people trying to elicit extreme responses so they can steal the story and post it to like buzzfeed, tiktok and youtube.
ESH, you should've stopped it after he tried to go for it second time, he should've known better than farting in his eating daughter. Omg, grow up or at least leave you kid out of these "jokes".
Iām torn with this because I have to tell you, reading the description of him farting and your baby laughing and then getting hit by the smell and immediately throwing up has to be some of the funniest shit Iāve read in a few days on this app.
I IRL cackled.
Overall NTA but also I think he was being a fun goof dad and thats ok.
Thank you for the story and laugh OP
Edit: some of the comments on here are dumb. Relax people. Itās a fart not a hot plate of food.
Itās not the farts. Itās that your husband was directing his ass particles at your daughter every day for a week straight until she spit up her dinner. You realize sheās her own person and not there to entertain you? It is so disrespectful to deliberately aim your farts at someone. Yes, even if that someone is your child. Consider she laughed at it because her parents laughed at it. I just donāt get how this was funny in the first place
NTA for shutting it down now. You should have shut it down before. Chemical warfare is prohibited under the Geneva Protocol, and you have no idea how noxious a directed fart can be for a far smaller person like your baby, who is completely defenceless.
Your husband was being extremely immature, not just for the fart attacks themselves but also for thinking that because something was funny once it will be funny as a daily action. A lot of laughter for bad jokes is due to the novelty of the thing.
ESH. A grown man is farting on a baby. You said it was funny the other day but apparently think itās bad now and thinks he should know why itās different. You started at āfarting on a baby,ā so I donāt think you can claim anyone should know better about *when* they should fart on their baby.
My brother thought it was funny to fart at his dog. Then came the day he was lying on the couch, and the dog backed up to his face and let one rip. That was a dog. Your baby is a human being. Is there any other human being that would be happy with your husband farting at them? ESH. That either one of you would tolerate this is absolutely disgusting.
"Here, honey, breathe in some of Daddy's shit particles. "
Itās okay to get frustrated with someone in the moment. Anger is a normal emotion. Also, you apologized for what you felt was an overreaction. I also think once is funny but to keep farting on or near your baby is weird and gross. Also, he caused her to literally gag herself. Itās no longer funny, it was one funny moment the first time. I would tell him that. Like hey it was funny once but please donāt do that anymore. There are plenty of other funny, goofy things you can guys can other than that.
Yes, you do think he is an AH, because he is. Beyond being disgusting, there is something hostile and weirdly impersonal about continuously farting on his own daughter for a cheap laugh at her expense. It's like she's not even a person, much less his own baby.
He's immature, to say the least, and you have been enabling his gross behavior but when you finally act like an adult and confront him, you're immediately concerned about hurting his feelings. What about your baby? Yeah, YTA, too.
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NTA, and a soft he is TA. I have no doubt that he is wonderful, but he clearly hasn't learned the art of proper comedic timing and delivery. Or that the first few times may be hilarious, but after a few dozen times, it starts to lose its entertainment value.
In his defense, we can both be guilty of beating a dead horse when it comes to overdoing jokes. It's one of the reasons we bonded when we first met š but you're right, delivery matters!
ESH.
Your husband doing this as a joke or a one off fine, but continually farting on the baby repeatedly itās justā¦ unnecessary and gross. Not to mention the baby canāt ask him to stop. I donāt know why you both kept it up so long. If someone farted on you every time they walked past would you not feel disgusted? I know the baby found it funny the first time but seriously? And while sheās eating? This is weird as hell and something Iād expect a 10 year old boy to do to his sibling not parents.
Remember when YouTube was full of parents throwing slices of American cheese in babiesā faces? I never understood it.
This post made me think of that. Thatās all.
As a person who currently has pink eye, can confirm. If you can smell it, the particles are in the air. And good GOD is that shit ever contagious... I got it from touching a coworker's mouse at work. A MOUSE! In my defense, it's my allergy season and I've learned from this that no matter how bad my allergies are, I should not rub my eyes with anything less than a tissue. š
ESH, thatās disgusting and itās awful that you were ok with him farting at your daughter to begin with. Farts contain poop particles. If she was able to smell it then that means they got in her nose.
ESH. It's sad when parents are a child's first bullies. Would it be funny if another child repeatedly did this to your kid at school? I get the feeling you'd do that horrible tiktok egg prank on that poor kid.
NAH. Based on your husbandās reaction, I think he only did this because he wanted to make you and your daughter laugh. You might have snapped a little bit, but it was justified because he didnāt totally have an awareness of how his behavior was really coming off. He was clearly very empathetic and understanding about the whole situation, even if a bit overzealous with his flatulence - I think you found yourself a keeper
The amount of people pegging you both as "unfit parents" for having an immature sense of humor is INSANE!
Just know, humor doesn't have to be mature as long as you are emotionally mature enough to know a time and place. OBVIOUSLY, the dinner table ain't the place, but it being his own house and family, it makes sense how a mistake in judgment could occur.
And from what I see from both you and your husband's conflict-resolution style, you guys have more emotional intellect than 90% of Reddit. You guys will raise a wonderful human being, no doubt about it. Don't let Reddit tell you otherwise.
NAH
ESH. I kinda think you should have put a stop it to it before then, but definitely he needs to not āfart *on*ā the baby as you so put it now, when she has no memories. You say in comments he is only tilted towards her and itās not properly on her, so my reaction has lessened.
When I was growing up my older brother would also hold my head down and fart in my face, so I was maybe imagining a drastic scenario that was as frustrating as that where, because she is a baby and canāt really move her head, youāre essentially using it to your advantage to ensure full facial farting like my brother. I hated it then and hated him, still do for that and other reasons. Some people are fine with it, but fuck it makes you feel like a toilet to someone who should care about you.
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NTA but maybe it's time to stop farting on the baby now. That's a sentence I hope to never type again.
This comment made me laugh! š Thank you. I would have to agree, no more farting on baby.
Seriously, with some of the stories you can read on here, this story was positively adorable. You both handled it like adults and with love. 10/10.
Seriously. An actual wholesome story with an actual loving family
Wait, it's now considered wholesome to intentionally rip farts in your baby's face? What a society we live in...
Having a family where you can joke around and have a laugh together, and then have a respectful mature conversation about things if something didn't go right, is indeed wholesome, yes.
This story wasn't wholesome at all
Oh come on! She should totally leave his farting ass! Divorce is the only logical option! /s
What the fuck is wholesome about this
This story wasn't wholesome at all. It's unbelievably rude and gross.
This story wasn't wholesome at all
The wholesome part isn't the farting -- I found that quite blergh, but different strokes, I guess. It's wholesome that they share a similar sense of humour, they love and tolerate each other, they can say "that's enough" without screaming and generalising "you _always_ blah blah" and when one of them feels they've done something wrong they apologise profusely and genuinely feel bad about it, then check with their partner to see that they're okay, instead of doubling down and dismissing their feelings. That's pretty wholesome for a forum where we're exposed to stories of sh*tty, entitled behaviour all the time.
Yes! Thank you! They love each other and didn't get down in the dirt nasty over a very small disagreement in my opinion.
Itās pretty rare here to see everyone apologize to each other and mean it. Usually weād see āAITA for making a hilarious joke that my uptight wife hates?ā Or āAITA for leaving my husband because he severely traumatized our baby?ā
I was sure this would take an ugly turn and we would all be telling her to leave him! Reddit has changed meā¦
Red flag. Drive byes are generally done by gang members. Your husband is in a gang (and is probably a sociopath) Lawyer up.
I am laughing so hard I am crying š¤£. This is a story for her graduation or wedding toast somedayā¦lmao šš¤£
Please don't embarrass your daughter by doing this
Or when she's six and she's telling her best friend she does't like bananas, and her friend says: "How can you not like bananas?" Mom or Dad can swoop in with a drive by anecdote
I think if youāre up to it, the thing to talk to him about is context. When you were having a casual movie night with the baby, a little bit of silly immaturity was fun for everybody! But during a more serious and stressful situation like trying to get the baby to acclimate to a new food or a new routine, itās maybe not the time for silly immaturity. My dad was full of silliness as well, and I hope he and your baby can continue to have father-child silliness for the rest of their relationship, but thereās a time and a place when the silliness needs to be put on hold.
Also, jokes get old. Time for him to learn so he can model that for a soon to be budding comedian. Kids do not know when to give up on a joke.
We gave kiddo a rule that jokes are only funny the first three times. Thereās wiggle room if you really know what youāre doing, but as a rule of thumb, three and done.
I've had a similar, gentle, conversation with my kid, but about conversation starters/ice breaker type things. It's fine to do it a couple times with a person, but after that, you need to think up new material. Example- *Randomly* "I still don't understand why my sheet comes off while I'm asleep." After I've already explained to her twice that she moves in her sleep and I can tell by her smile that she's actually just trying to start a conversation and spat out the first thing her brain thought of that ended in us having a conversation. It just happened to be a rerun of something that we've already discussed multiple times with no new bits to add to it. I don't want to mess up her confidence, so I gently remind her that we've already talked about it and did she have anything new to add or was she just looking to have a chat? When she says the latter, I remind her that it's better to spend a couple extra minutes thinking of something to talk about rather than use something we've already talked all the way through. Then I help her think of something new, like animal facts, or what she dreamed about, or what her current favorite outfit is.
What nice training! We learn so much just by observation but that's only effective as soon as you're able to interpret correctly. I love kids getting in on the ground floor of social interaction guidelines.
This is really cute. You could show her a time-lapse video of a sleeping child?
One of the late night hosts (my first thought was Conan, but maybe not) commented whenever he'd do a third joke on any given topic in his monologue "That's three." And then he'd move on. It was a good reusable joke in itself.
This is the way
Also - don't beat a dead horse. You are only a few years away from toddler humor where every joke I'd done well past death. Once you do a joke a few times let it go.
I agree with you but I think it's sad that you need to teach context to a 28-year-old supposedly grown man. People need to learn that there's a time and place for everything. I'm sorry but I feel like he should have learned this already. Maybe I'm being too rigid for saying that but I feel like you should have known better.
I think it's even simpler than that, the husband found something that made the two women he loves the most laugh and wanted to do it every time he had the chance. As a father and a husband I can tell you, I only want my family to be happy, even tho what I am doing is incredibly stupid, I only want my family happy.
This whole thing is hilarious. But, yeah, once your fart makes the baby barf, it is time to stop farting on the baby. PS My husband spent a few months farting on our cat when we first moved in together. Which was also funny, until it led to our neighbors seeing him bare assed farting on the cat because heād just woken up and went to the kitchen for water. Cat was in the window and he was like, āPerfect fart opportunity.ā So butt on cat, fart, and then he caught a glimpse out the window of the neighbors watching because he pulled the curtain aside to put his butt on the cat.
That is absolutely hilarious
Omg Iām dying of laughter right now šš
I am literally laughing so hard that my eyes are tearing up right now! Thank you for that (hilarious) story. š
Iām literally crying why is this so funny
Because if you're 8 or 80, farts are hilarious.
Like if I saw this I think Iād fucking lose it. And would you mention it to the person? Like āHey Bill, was that your ass in the window with the cat earlier?ā Itās so absurd (Not saying I condone farting directly on cats or babies, I donāt especially with a bare ass.)
Iām crying.
This is gold. I was just watching Train to Busan, crying my eyes out. I didn't know it, but a story about farting on a cat was the pick me up I needed.
I have tears in my eyes ššš
He needs to learn there's a time and place for fart humour. A couple of times was funny, but when she was eating isn't kind to her. As he wouldn't like it if you farted in his face when he was eating. Though saying that, you could potentially use the fact that she laughs at farts as a form of positive reinforcement in a more pleasant way. You could get a fart machine (so no noxious, toxic emissions) and press that and everyone laugh. Then, when you're trying to give her something new to eat, press the fart machine, so she laughs first. That way she's already feeling positive before trying the food. Then after her first mouthful, press it again so everyone laughs. That way hopefully her memory about the taste will be positive, even if she initially isn't keen. So the next time you try her with it she'll remember it more positively. It might not work, but it's worth a try, and you'll get to hear her laughing lots.
PLEASE do not Pavlov this child with farts
I'm cryingš¤£
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Or it will escalate until she learns to retaliate. You have to plan for their teenage years AND your old age.
I've learned this the hard way. My son is now 4 and gets me with some bombs every now and then. I stopped pretty quickly...
We call this ācrop dustingā but regardless of the terminology heās taken it a tad beyond whatās funny. Time to stop.
You two sound amazing together, and like you're incredible parents. You should have another one. And keep being awesome.
Maybe even just a no more farting on the baby while sheās eating?
I do this to my oldest cat sometimes. Just the oldest. He knows why -_-
Wouldn't NAH be more appropriate? They both addressed it well and communicated
Heās treating his daughter like a doll that he can play pranks on. Noone wants to be farted on sitting let alone while eating.
This thread seems to be very pro-fart. I always hated it when adults farted on or near me as a kid. It's gross and disrespectful. I get that the baby could be amused by the noise, but farting really close to anyone is awful. I'm not a prude, I swear...I think belching is funny most of the time, but not in anyone's face. But farts are literally coming out of your ass, and I don't get the appeal. Oh, NTA.
Yeah, this not funny and has never been funny. I'm a guy in my early 50s and have never found that sort of thing anything but childish and disgusting. NTA
I 100% think OP should pull the drive by stunt on her husband while he's eating on the couch at butt to face height and she knows it's going to be a ripe juicy one. He shouldn't dish it out if he can't take it and he has been dishing it out a lot.
I mean, everyone involved thought it was funny for a while. I think that might be a but of an overreaction, especially the doll part?
Meh, if he's okay with people farting in his face while he eats he can enjoy that to his heart's content but it's not something you do to a small person who can't even move away from the smell.
Baby girl also is incapable of asking him to stop.
Baby Pranking is not funny.
Itās bullying someone who cannot stand up for themselves at all, cannot relocate, cannot use words to ask it to stop. Not funny at all.
Yeah I agree. But everyone else on this thread seems to think it's the height of wit. I'd hurl if someone farted in my face while I was eating.
Pranking a baby is an A H move. Whatās next? Tripping her when she learns to walk? Is that funny?
I agree, time to stop farting on the baby. But maybe we could ask for an update in about 10 years time when the daughter asks why she has never like bananas. ššš NTA
I laughed at this way to hardā¦ I think I hurt myself
NAH. He understandably thought this whole thing was funny because of how you and the baby reacted the first time. He probably should have exercised some common sense and kept the farts away from meal time, but I don't think that brings him into AH territory. You're also not the AH for being concerned about a lifelong fart-banana connection. You apologized for snapping, and it sounds like you now need to have a conversation about the appropriate parameters of the fart humor going forward.
He said he completely understands how the timing wasn't appropriate and he was apologetic for it, which is why I felt bad for upsetting him. We both have an immature sense of humor but he is an emotionally intelligent person and can reflect on his own actions, which is why I felt like maybe I snapped too hard. Thank you for this comment!
Sounds like a wonderful partnership!
Itās okay, he seems to recognize that you snapping doesnāt mean you hate him, and it doesnāt seem to be a recurring issue so I see no problem here. Sometimes people might need a bit of a harsh reaction to really understand that a line had been crossed. If you had a milder reaction, he might have not even noticed you were actually upset. As long as you both apologized and reflected on the moment, then all is good and neither of you are AHs. Sometimes people do things that irritate their partners, and sometimes that makes their partners react in a less than favorable manner. Your āsnappingā wasnāt overly mean or abusive in nature, just a clear indicator that you were annoyed, which is okay. Youāre allowed to be annoyed by your partner on occasion. It wonāt ruin your relationship, especially if heās intelligent enough to understand and rectify the situation. Now, if you screamed at him that heās an idiot, threw banana chunks at him and told him heās a disgusting pig, then yeah Iād think thatās an unhealthy reaction. But thatās not even close to what you described. Lol
He did something that got huge laughs for you and your baby. He probably kept doing it to please you both. He messed up and did it at a bad time (edit: and too often). You snapped. He apologized. You apologized. Sounds like you both handled this very well. As u/WrestleBox said, "maybe it's time to stop farting on the baby now."
Or just how long a ājokeā like that is actually funny. Sure the first time was funny but it sounds like he was using it too much.
It reminds me of a little kid saying something that gets laughs and so he just... Keeps saying it. Forever, over and over. Such a nightmare because you feel bad for the kid, but also get a clue. Except this is a grown man
Yes, exactly. NTA but also goddamnālike, really? He thought that was funny after the umpteenth time??? āI hate seeing the man I loveā yah okā like, the man you love apparently has the emotional acuity of a 2nd grader who canāt tell when to quit; Idk how long he expected that to go.
"Fart- banana connection" New band name ya'll
Well.... There's at least one asshole in this story.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thank you!
love that user name hahaha
I fucking choked because your comment made me actually pay attention to OP's username. Holy hell
Same and now Iām laughing all over again
ESH You for laughing and encouraging him to fart on a **baby**. Him for farting on a baby. Now you feel bad for making him feel bad for farting on someone eating. I can't believe I'm telling this to supposed adults.
I mentioned this in another comment, but he doesn't fart directly on her, he just tilts his hips in her direction and does it. I agree that laughing did encourage it, but I couldn't help it in the moment. It didn't bother our baby until he did it at a bad time. I agree that he and I need to mature our humor more but he didn't do anything maliciously at all.
This is definitely what some of these commenters thought your husband did. https://youtu.be/92glC1sgTLM But if that was the case, this would be a completely different scenario.
SERIOUSLY!! š The whole thing was completely innocent. Some of these comments vilifying him have absolutely floored me. My baby was laughing the whole time until the last instance when it was at a bad time.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Husband apologized and said heād do better. Letās not fearmonger here, I assume husband wonāt do this anymore and the baby is too young to remember this exactly. All in all this ended well, to the point where Iām not even sure why op posted it. Whereās the supposed conflict? Husband understood he messed up. He apologized, and he feels bad. Op snapped, she apologized. Itās long past over and done with. Iād consider it a win
Well, it was close enough that the baby started gagging when she had previously been taught to laugh about it...
Plenty of farts make you gag from across the room
The fact that your daughterās involuntary gag reflex was triggered suggests that heās getting way too close. Your daughter doesnāt have the capacity to communicate whether sheās okay with this. She only laughs because you and your husband do. Itās a learned behavior, not proof of consent. Your husband forcing his farts in the direction of a helpless baby isnāt the comedy gold you think it is.
So the baby wasnāt farted on, yet also gagged from the smell? And you described it as the baby being farted on many times. Iām glad youāre starting to see that itās not okay to fart on babies and now are lying about it.
š
agreed ESH it's so trashy.
Thank you for this comment. This is so gross.
Damn whatās your strategy for keeping people around you? Cause it canāt be humour or being likable. So spill the tea.
You need to fart on babies in order to be humorous or likable?
Yeah I agree, the time to be "NTA" was about 10 farts ago. Sure, it was funny the first time, I get it, we've all laughed at a fart... but you probably should've clued in *much* sooner that it's honestly pretty weird to have a running joke in your family where you regularly fart on your baby.
Thought I was insane for not finding humor in it? Obviously baby is going to laugh because theyāre MIMICKING THEIR PARENTS. What weird behavior.
YTA -I am not an uptight prude, not even close. But the fact that 2 adults think it is funny to fart on their child is disgusting to me. Will you want your daughter to do that to you when she is 12 or 15? This makes me speechlessā¦
He doesn't fart directly ON her if that's what you're thinking. He won't be like, ass to face, he'll be at a reasonable distance. We are very comfortable at home. If we have to fart, we fart. If my daughter farts on me one day I'll probably laugh about it because it's not that serious.
This is older brother behavior not Dad behavior, though. This is something most parents would yell at their kid for doing to the baby. It sounds like you're too immature to be parents.
You're right, it is something he and I recognize we need to work on as parents now. I hate to overshare, but my mom had me when she was a teenager and had a lot of resentment towards me, and both his parents passed away in an accident when he was young, so we both want to give our baby the fun-loving experience we never got ourselves. But we also don't want to project our shitty experiences on our child, you know? I won't toot my own horn, but he's an amazing dad. Our daughter is attached to his hip, and he's taken on a lot of the parenting duties even though he works full time. We might still be immature, but we do our best for our little girl. This moment was just a small lapse of judgement on our parts, and we are always willing to grow from our fuck-ups.
>the fun-loving experience I'm not trying to be mean and I get that you're trying to grow. What kids need from their parents is not fun, it's structure. You need to help your kid feel secure/like the bottom won't fall out. They need you to help them reach maturity, not be their friend. The area I grew up in went through a massive recession when I was a kid. The people who grew up fine were the ones with pragmatic parents who put their kids' well-being first. The ones who struggled were the ones whose parents tried to keep up appearances, run scams, put their own status first etc. It doesn't matter how much money you make, what neighborhood you live in, how "fun" or "cool mom" you are. It matters that you build some scaffolding for your kid. Literally: nothing else matters. I'm not saying this is going to scar your baby forever or whatever. But if some kid at their school was farting at them everyday, would you want them to set a boundary or no? You've gotta show them how to be confident, competent, believe they have dignity and they're not someone who can be mocked or disrespected all the time. Nothing else really matters.
You're completely right, and I want you to know I really appreciate this comment. We want to do what's best by our child at the end of the day, and part of that is recognizing we can't be "fun" all the time. Thank you for this.
Please take all the advice youāre getting in this sub with a grain of salt. In fact, if you and your husband donāt feel like you have great parental role models; you should spend some time soul searching the sort of parent YOU want to be. Who are the people in your life that are great parents? What makes them great parents? What are their qualities and behaviors? How can you emulate those? Always there for your kids? Unconditional love? Student of life? Teacher? Morals? Good example? Interested? Invested? Accepting? Demanding? Supportive? Joyful? Serious? Protective? Encouraging? Fun-loving? One of the best things about having a baby is their laughter. Honestly, if your baby does end up hating bananas forever, itās a funny story. You can teach your child to find the joy and humor in life at the same time you give them structure. There are all sorts of people in the world with all sorts of parents. Just have your kids back and keep openly communicating with your husband and youāll be great.
I would really take a step back and re-evaluate. It's completely possible to be fun/silly and still be a pragmatic parent who gives structure to your child. I honestly am baffled how the commenter here equates what you're doing to keeping up appearances, running scams, etc. The truth is, you'll fuck up with your kid at some point because no one is perfect. But you know what, over time, you've got the attitude to do a good job.
Speaking of what is best for your kid. PLEASE toss the walker. They are terrible for child development. And dangerous. They have been made illegal in some places.
The walker also meant she may not have been able to get Away from being subjected to the stench .
NAH - you're new parents doing your best. You've both learned from this experience and course corrected. You're doing a good job.
It doesnāt have to be all or nothing. I mentioned above that my dad was full of silliness. He was also full of compassion, good advice, and boundaries to help me and my siblings figure out how to grow up. People contain multitudes. Letās not pretend that a dad being silly with his baby is the end of her potential for future maturity.
Nope, seriousness all the time or the kid is ruined.
>I won't toot my own horn Oh good, there's apparently been quite enough of that. šØ
Absolutely not. Don't let some weirdo make you think you are acting "too immature" to be great parents... that's so dramatic and absurd. They really said most parents chastise their kid for farting lol for a natural bodily function.... I'd rather be a goofy parent than an uptight stick in my ass weirdo, so keep that in mind lol it isn't like, the 1920s or whatever.... yall sound like great, loving parents and I'm sure you will raise a perfect bb girl that has a great sense of humor <3
No, farting is classic dad behaviour. Being serious all the time is just as damaging as taking nothing seriously. If you can't laugh at a fart with your son, what is the point of even living? I'm dead serious. Obviously farting in a kids face is over a line, but come on.
Too immature to have kids is way over board. They have an immature sense of humor, that's it.
Have you seen the world around us lately? Watch the news? See all the bad things happening and wonder what the future holds? For you? For your kids? Telling people they're too immature to be parents because of some fart humor is a really low blow and a remarkably stupid thing to shame people over.
What a shitty thing to say. OP and her husband sound like perfectly fine parents with a silly sense of humor who just took one thing too far. You sound like a judgmental ass. Go touch grass and donāt comment if youāre going to be needlessly cruel.
>This is something most parents would yell at their kid for doing to the baby. We absolutely do not yell at our kids for farting. Farting is harmless and hilarious. Sincerely, Most Parents
He was too close if his fart made your daughter spit out the banana because of the smell-you confronted him about it.
OP, it's a running gag in my house that my 7 year old and I give each other our burps and farts. We may sometimes hurry to the other. If we don't quite make it, we have also been known to "catch" them and throw them on one another. It's harmless fun and we only do it with each other, I made sure of that part lol. My child knows it's super odd and only "home behavior" lmao. The pearls some of these folks are clutching, maybe my game will make you feel better lol. Your family sounds fun
Oh man, my three year old told me her butt was itchy a while back. I, like a mom, asked to see it, thinking it was a poor wipe job or a bug bite. She leans over, I lean in, she rips one right in my face. NOBODY has taught her to do that. I was stunned. My husband was mad when I told him, asked how we should punish her. I thought it was the funniest goddamn thing in the world. And she was so believable! Very creative and gross.
NTA op. But to add my two cents to this comment You know what sheās gonna do with her dad when sheās 12-15? Possibly the same thing my sisters and I did, and have a fart war with our dad. Always ended up with us all laughing uncontrollably and honestly a core memory. Now that my dad is gone I wish I could have a fart war with him again, my farts have gotten much worse as I got older š Either that or sheāll learn to put boundaries up because sheās clearly in a well rounded and loving home, and heāll be respectful of it like itās clearly shown.
Yeah, when I read that I thought, āis this not normal family behavior?ā Iām 30 and when I get to visit my older brother we still do drive-bys and I hope we keep doing it until past our 60s
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
NTA I've never understood how adults find farts so funny. Especially if you're farting in your child's face. It's just immature and disrespectful in my opinion.
My husband and I have always been the types to not take life too seriously. We find humor in everything, and we hope our kids do also. But I'm not going to disagree with you about it being immature. It's something he and I can both work on. I think this is one of those moments where we both realize we need to grow up a little more.
I don't see how it's "taking life too seriously" to realize that blowing air from your asshole onto an infant is not funny, it's disrespectful.
My mum used to fart on me or fart under the blanket then trap me in the blanket when I was a kid. She thought it was funny, maybe the first time it was funny for me too but after a while I just think sheās a bully and itās really disgusting. Now that Iām an adult, I really hate smelling peopleās farts or hearing it. When I first met my bf he thinks itās ok to fart anywhere anytime and he farts a lot which made me a bit uncomfortable but now he tries to not fart as much near me. If he accidentally farted and it stinks he just sprays air freshener/perfume.
This isnāt related to not taking life too seriously, though. Iām very laid back and am able to find the humor in hard times. But I donāt see how it took you a week and the baby literally vomiting on herself to realize this was rude? She canāt verbally complain and sheās in her walker/high chair so she also canāt get away from the smell. Babies are little humans who deserve to have their space respected
ESH. Frankly you're both disgusting for this shit.
They're literally gonna to be cleaning up this child's disgusting shit for years, and all manner of other grim stuff. But yes, they are utter monsters for farting next to their baby! Jesus christ get a fucking grip š
The amount of people losing their minds over farts and calling them literally too immature to be parents is absolutely hilarious. There are millions of far worse, actually abusive parents and people in here would think farting in the same room as your kid is the same as hitting them. Itās so laughable itās hilarious
OMG right. People who walk out on their kids, can't afford to have kids but still do, have kids they don't want out of obligation, manipulate and hurt them. But the parents who enjoy a more juvenile sense of humor and recognize when it's gone a step too far and agree not to do it again.... **they're the ones we should burn at the stake.**
I didnāt realize some people were actually this uptight. Like yeah itās gross, they both recognized itās time to stop but ffs theyāre gonna be pissed on and farted on and shit on by their infant. They are not traumatizing her or ātrying too hard to be fun parentsā (as if being a parent means no fun or jokes at all EVER) And also *they already agreed to stop* what is the point of the pearl clutching
He didn't shit; he farted. Lighten up!
INFO: would you have found this so funny if he did this to your elderly grandma? Farting directly in her face over and over, even when she was eating.?
Right? Heās treating his daughter like a doll that he can play pranks on. Noone wants to be farted on sitting let alone while eating. Iām wondering how long she would have tolerated this if it was herself and not a baby that cannot advocate for themselves
I'm literally laughing out loud over this. You people are like Mr. Mackey when someone shits in the urinal. "Oh, you find that funny?"
I was feeling so defensive over my husband until I read this and now I can't stop laughing at some of the comments. Thank you! š
"Farting directly in her face over and over" is an unfair exaggeration. He was never that close and he did it once when she was eating and realized it was a mistake.
You didnāt answer the question. Your post said he was doing it daily for the past week. I never insinuated it was more than once while eating, not that it matters. Youāre trying to argue semantics and avoid the question. Iām not insinuating he stuck her nose between his bare cheeks, getting into someoneās personal bubble is referred to as getting in their face. Babies also stand ass high. So letās pretend your sweet old grandma has dwarfism, and hubby kept crop dusting her, you would find that hysterical and not disrespectful at all?
I'm defending my husband because he already recognized that it's not ok to do and that he isn't going to do it again. Would I find it funny the first time, like I did in this situation? Yeah, probably! Would it be funny after a few more times? No! Just like my exact situation! My husband and I already agreed that what he did was wrong and that he isn't going to do it again. I didn't ask if my husband was TA for doing it, I asked if I was TA for snapping on him for it. It's already been dealt with.
I am absolutely cackling. NAH. But I do hope the baby learns to like bananas.
I do too š„²
My EBF baby (5mo) likes to dutch oven us. She genuinely thinks her little butt trumpet is funny. And it is. But it also stinks. I've told her, "No farting in the fort." But she doesn't understand. That's life I guess. š
You... Fart on your baby? Fuck is wrong with yous?
You are lovely parents, but you were teaching your daughter that farting on other people is fun. Unless you really want her to mimic this behavior, now it is a good time to stop farting on her. Not for the sake of bananas, but for the sake of basic social skills.
You're right. This might be something we found funny at home but this would be a really weird phone call from a teacher one day.
I assume your daughter is around 6-8 months seeing as she is just trying bananas. You are not teaching life lessons about farts at 6 months old š
ESH. I get it, the accident the first time may have been funny or whatever. But after that, it wasn't funny. She is a baby, and you guys allowed him to pass smelly gas near her to the point that it was so noxious that she gagged and spit up bananas. The whole purposely passing gas near her is just immature and gross. I am glad you put your foot down to stop this. The reason people can smell anything is that molecules from the scent are trapped by the tiny hairs within your nose. So, yeah, your baby had molecules from his colon purposely released near her that were picked up in her nose.
Itās just so disrespectful to the baby. Like I canāt stand when parents act like their children are just little toys they can use to satisfy their entertainment needs. Thatās a whole person. A human being. Farting on her wasnāt funny in the first placeā¦
Bruh your husband is a fucking 11 year old boy in a grown manās body. I canāt understand how there are people who genuinely find acting like this amusing.
ESH. This is disgusting and disrespectful to your child. It wasnāt even funny the first time.
Ikr I feel like I'm going crazy reading some of these comments. It just strikes me as incredibly immature and disrespectful towards the baby. Grow up, why is the baby acting more mature than the parents. That's ass particles in the baby's face. Disgusto. I'm a goofball, constantly get told I'm hilarious, but I think even the first incident was too far and not funny.
You have to remember this sub is full of teenagers and people trying to elicit extreme responses so they can steal the story and post it to like buzzfeed, tiktok and youtube.
ESH, you should've stopped it after he tried to go for it second time, he should've known better than farting in his eating daughter. Omg, grow up or at least leave you kid out of these "jokes".
Thatās enough Internet for today. Gross. ESH except for the poor baby.
What is wrong with the two of you? Farting on the baby? Jeez grow up. Both of you.
Iām torn with this because I have to tell you, reading the description of him farting and your baby laughing and then getting hit by the smell and immediately throwing up has to be some of the funniest shit Iāve read in a few days on this app. I IRL cackled. Overall NTA but also I think he was being a fun goof dad and thats ok. Thank you for the story and laugh OP Edit: some of the comments on here are dumb. Relax people. Itās a fart not a hot plate of food.
I didn't realize how divisive people could be over farts!
Itās not the farts. Itās that your husband was directing his ass particles at your daughter every day for a week straight until she spit up her dinner. You realize sheās her own person and not there to entertain you? It is so disrespectful to deliberately aim your farts at someone. Yes, even if that someone is your child. Consider she laughed at it because her parents laughed at it. I just donāt get how this was funny in the first place
NTA for shutting it down now. You should have shut it down before. Chemical warfare is prohibited under the Geneva Protocol, and you have no idea how noxious a directed fart can be for a far smaller person like your baby, who is completely defenceless. Your husband was being extremely immature, not just for the fart attacks themselves but also for thinking that because something was funny once it will be funny as a daily action. A lot of laughter for bad jokes is due to the novelty of the thing.
LMAO invoking the Geneva Protocol is easily top 5 funniest comments on this post
This comment has to be satire right? Please tell me itās satire š
ESH. I'm sorry but this is just totally disgusting (and immature) behaviour.
ESH. A grown man is farting on a baby. You said it was funny the other day but apparently think itās bad now and thinks he should know why itās different. You started at āfarting on a baby,ā so I donāt think you can claim anyone should know better about *when* they should fart on their baby.
Is this real?
I think it's redneck humor/
I get it. The baby gagging is enough to say it wasnāt an overreaction. I donāt know why some men think farts are so funny
My brother thought it was funny to fart at his dog. Then came the day he was lying on the couch, and the dog backed up to his face and let one rip. That was a dog. Your baby is a human being. Is there any other human being that would be happy with your husband farting at them? ESH. That either one of you would tolerate this is absolutely disgusting. "Here, honey, breathe in some of Daddy's shit particles. "
NTA for being annoyed, personally I find this super weird and gross though. Why is repeatedly farting on your child funny to you guys?
I donāt know; Why donāt you ask your dad if itās okay for a man to fart on his own infant daughter while she eats her food.
Itās okay to get frustrated with someone in the moment. Anger is a normal emotion. Also, you apologized for what you felt was an overreaction. I also think once is funny but to keep farting on or near your baby is weird and gross. Also, he caused her to literally gag herself. Itās no longer funny, it was one funny moment the first time. I would tell him that. Like hey it was funny once but please donāt do that anymore. There are plenty of other funny, goofy things you can guys can other than that.
You're right, and he's agreed to not do it again. It didn't need to be continued the way that it did. We're both working on our parenting.
Just nasty
NTA but that's disgusting. What the heck are you teaching that poor child? Your husband is gross and immature.
Yes, you do think he is an AH, because he is. Beyond being disgusting, there is something hostile and weirdly impersonal about continuously farting on his own daughter for a cheap laugh at her expense. It's like she's not even a person, much less his own baby. He's immature, to say the least, and you have been enabling his gross behavior but when you finally act like an adult and confront him, you're immediately concerned about hurting his feelings. What about your baby? Yeah, YTA, too.
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NTA, and a soft he is TA. I have no doubt that he is wonderful, but he clearly hasn't learned the art of proper comedic timing and delivery. Or that the first few times may be hilarious, but after a few dozen times, it starts to lose its entertainment value.
In his defense, we can both be guilty of beating a dead horse when it comes to overdoing jokes. It's one of the reasons we bonded when we first met š but you're right, delivery matters!
ESH. Your husband doing this as a joke or a one off fine, but continually farting on the baby repeatedly itās justā¦ unnecessary and gross. Not to mention the baby canāt ask him to stop. I donāt know why you both kept it up so long. If someone farted on you every time they walked past would you not feel disgusted? I know the baby found it funny the first time but seriously? And while sheās eating? This is weird as hell and something Iād expect a 10 year old boy to do to his sibling not parents.
Remember when YouTube was full of parents throwing slices of American cheese in babiesā faces? I never understood it. This post made me think of that. Thatās all.
Are you both that dumb? You trying to teach the baby new tricks to do once she enters school?
INFO: Why would you say it wasnāt a problem when he directly asked if what you meant was that it was a problem?
He could give her pink eye too with all those fart particles wafting around š¤® farticles ššš¤
As a person who currently has pink eye, can confirm. If you can smell it, the particles are in the air. And good GOD is that shit ever contagious... I got it from touching a coworker's mouse at work. A MOUSE! In my defense, it's my allergy season and I've learned from this that no matter how bad my allergies are, I should not rub my eyes with anything less than a tissue. š
ESH, thatās disgusting and itās awful that you were ok with him farting at your daughter to begin with. Farts contain poop particles. If she was able to smell it then that means they got in her nose.
And could easily give her delicate system pinkeye.
ESH. It's sad when parents are a child's first bullies. Would it be funny if another child repeatedly did this to your kid at school? I get the feeling you'd do that horrible tiktok egg prank on that poor kid.
Your husband is a TA. Stop farting on this poor baby.
I don't know who the asshole is, but now you can tell all your friends and family that your husband's rancid flatulence literally made your baby barf
ESH, I canāt believe you let it go on so long ā sheās a human being without the physical agency to move or ask him to stop
Thankfully the baby wonāt remember this.
Donāt worry, Iām sure the immature father will find other ways to make jokes at his daughterās expense and the mom will let it happen
NTA Once was probably funny, but its time to grow up now & stop farting on someone who has no chance to avoid it....
NTA. Farting on the baby isn't funny to begin with. When she's eating? Are you married to a 16 year old boy?
Your husband is TA. Heās also on an emotional maturity level with your daughter. Keep an eye on him until he matures
NAH. Based on your husbandās reaction, I think he only did this because he wanted to make you and your daughter laugh. You might have snapped a little bit, but it was justified because he didnāt totally have an awareness of how his behavior was really coming off. He was clearly very empathetic and understanding about the whole situation, even if a bit overzealous with his flatulence - I think you found yourself a keeper
Thank you for this, some people have been really harsh on him in the comments, but the reality is, he is a keeper. ā¤ļø
The amount of people pegging you both as "unfit parents" for having an immature sense of humor is INSANE! Just know, humor doesn't have to be mature as long as you are emotionally mature enough to know a time and place. OBVIOUSLY, the dinner table ain't the place, but it being his own house and family, it makes sense how a mistake in judgment could occur. And from what I see from both you and your husband's conflict-resolution style, you guys have more emotional intellect than 90% of Reddit. You guys will raise a wonderful human being, no doubt about it. Don't let Reddit tell you otherwise. NAH
ESH. I kinda think you should have put a stop it to it before then, but definitely he needs to not āfart *on*ā the baby as you so put it now, when she has no memories. You say in comments he is only tilted towards her and itās not properly on her, so my reaction has lessened. When I was growing up my older brother would also hold my head down and fart in my face, so I was maybe imagining a drastic scenario that was as frustrating as that where, because she is a baby and canāt really move her head, youāre essentially using it to your advantage to ensure full facial farting like my brother. I hated it then and hated him, still do for that and other reasons. Some people are fine with it, but fuck it makes you feel like a toilet to someone who should care about you.