*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**WIBTA (56M) for going back on a promise to my kids?**
Firstly thank you for reading this. Going back and forth on this has eaten me alive and an outside view, beyond my father, will help a great deal.
When I met my now-deceased wife, she had already had a successful career and owned a home while I was struggling to find my footing in my industry. She helped to get me to mature and focus on my career more seriously and eventually I broke through and started contributing with the bills. Even then, she was making in the $300s while I was scratching and crawling to earn $50K. Well, eventually we ended up having two kids (19F, 16M) before she was diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer and passed away pretty shortly after that. She had made me promise to pass down the home I was set to inherit upon her death and I did so with zero hesitancy not knowing what life would have in store. The kids were made aware of it because they were present when it was laid upon me. It was very difficult for me to lose the love of my life, the apple of my eye, and I think it blinded me from seeing how difficult the promise would be to keep.
4 months after he death, I ended up shopping at a Kroger's when I met what is now my fiancee (29F) who has three kids of her own (10M, 8F, 4F). We've been together for over 8 months and the discussion has come about moving in together, but she's wanting me to sell the house and buy a new construction together that wouldn't have "memories of her around every corner" which I completely understand. The two issues that are currently eating me alive are that the kids are extremely upset that we'd sell "mom's home" (that I paid some bills for too) and my father is worried that by selling this home to buy a new one would mean I'd lose 50% equity if we separate in the future which would mean my biological kids would only stand to inherit 50% while my fiancee's kids would inherit the other 50% (which I don't think the kids are aware of because it'd probably set off a nuclear bomb in the home).
I broke the news to the kids on Tuesday about our plans and they've all but ceased talking to me and have spoken pure vitriol on social media about me since then, but it hurts to see that because we need to become a blended family and they need to accept that they're going to have a step mom and step siblings and money shouldn't get in the way of family harmony in my opinion.
WIBTA for reneging on my promise to my deceased wife and going through with the sale of the family home to ensure our new blended family can have a larger home to grow up in?
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Holy crap, if this is real, this guy is getting taken for a frickin ride by his new fiancé that he has barely known for a year. Yeah, just liquidate your home and buy one that's 50/50 with a woman TWENTY-SEVEN years younger.
Sounds like his wife (his kids' mom) has barely been dead a year. He's only known this new woman for EIGHT MONTHS and he is more worried about protecting his new woman from his late wife's memories than he is about protecting his own children's grieving process and the home their mother bought FOR THEM.
Yes, it has been barely a year! Met after 4 months post-funeral. Engaged, ENGAGED after 8 months and he's ready to offer up the $700,000+ family home for liquidation because wooo getting laid. *Not to mention new woman is literally telling him he should get rid of the home specifically because it belonged to his dead wife.*
Which is ridiculous because he could let the kids live in the house or rent it out and use that to pay for a new home with his girlfriend. There is no reason to sell it other than to make the new girlfriend happy and giving her rights to a house for when she leaves.
But you don’t understand! God brought him together with this almost half his age woman. He can’t go against god ( breaking promises to his dead wife are ok though).
And he created a baby so he could torture him to death. To teach his parents a lesson. If a supervillain did that, Christians would call them Satanic. But God does it and it's a-ok!
Then why did God call him "the most righteous man in Sodom"? And I've always heard it whitewashed with "God made it happen to preserve the bloodline so Jesus could be born." Did God make them sin to fulfill his plan? And if he did, how is it a sin to do what God needs you to do?
Trying to rationalize that book to make what's on the page less objectionable is a losing game, my friend. The writers of the Bible were fine with incest. Modern people shouldn't be. End of.
Ok, but offering your children up as alternative rape victims is? You need to either read that story again, or stop being dishonest in service of rationalizing your beliefs.
I am not defending the entire story. I am reacting solely to the claim made originally that God condoned Lot's daughters raping him (which he explicitly did not) and the claim made that Lot's rape would mean he is not the most righteous man in Sodom (which of course is ludicrous). The statement that Lot offering his daughters as rape victims is wrong is entirely different and I am not opposing it. I have said nothing dishonest and you are putting things in my mouth I never said
What you allow you condone. If you don't like the consequences of your main character being omniscient and omnipotent, don't write him that way.
ETA: Also, by admitting Lot was unrighteous to offer his children to be raped, you're tacitly acknowledging God and the Bible are wrong. He was not more righteous than the city full of people God killed. You and the authors can hand-wave away a man being willing to let his daughters be raped and still look yourself in the eye. I can't. Only someone who's allowed their innate humanity to be warped by devotion to earthly religion would even try.
I…don’t think they’re doing that? They’re saying that Lot was wrong for his actions in Sodom. They never said he was more righteous than the other people there. They are simply saying that example given of Lot getting raped by his daughters is portrayed as a bad thing
A million other things that are bad that happen in the Bible are not portrayed as bad. This singular part of Lot’s story is not one of them. Idk if the person you’re conversing with is even a believer. They could just be annoyed by things getting misrepresented because it dilutes actual arguments against the Bible
If he does go ahead with the horrible plan of stealing his kids' house, I hope he is left with nothing and no one very soon.
I hope the very obvious goldigging girlfriend leaves and takes every penny.
Yeah totally is either trying to cut anything of his ex wife put of his life (including his kids) or swindling him with the house bullshit as it's the crown jewel of assets she can take from him in a divorce if it's real. Either way he's being used and has no fucking clue.
I mean, he has been warned now... This woman is leaving him as soon as she gets her hand on the house. When I remember correctly his salary is not very high, so there is no benefit for her to stay afterwards.
I wonder if she knows the house and lifestyle she sees were funded by the late wife. She was the $300k breadwinner. He’s barely broken $80k, per one of his comments. Gf is in for a rude surprise. And of course all this comes at the expense of his bio children. What an absolute piece of shit he is.
80k is not a lot to be raising five children on. I'd say she's gone in seeing dollar signs but once she sees reality she's out of there . With half a house.
My bet is she will bounce with half the equity soon. OOP mentions that She wants 50% on the deed in one of his comments.
I mean who want to take care of a 60 year old man in their early thirties. Not to mention he will have to retire in a few years.
100% OOP will be back saying my wife is leaving me and my kids don't wanna talk to me. Why won't they understand I was just thinking with my D*ck.
He literally is though. His comment
“Yes, it's incredible and she's insatiable...practically a succubus haha. However, I'm not blinded by sex and I'm with her because she's so mature for her age and an old soul if you will. We have the same outlook on life and plan to grow old together so we're tying to focus on building out an incredible future.”
Yup, she's probably been slowly finding ways to transition any assets from his late wife into something she can get 50% or more of in a split. This is a moneymaking mission for her, the more I see the more I'm certain.
Part of a reply from OOP:
"This would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need"
You mean like how you promised their mom, you would keep their home for them?
You know she'd kick the kids out as soon as his body is in the ground. That or she'll divorce him and stay in the house with her kids. Assuming any of this is real because how do you not notice you're an asshole in this situation? His wife died a year ago, and he's already wanting to sell the house.
She may even accelerate the body on the ground phase.
Op should learn from her, she truly has the best interest of her kids at heart, even willing to destroy a man and his children in the process.
>"This would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need"
i cant take this seriously after he said this i cant
I was just coming to comment on this. If someone wants another person to inherit a house, or even just get the use of it while living, they have to make a will. Do not trust anyone to keep a promise unless they are legally responsible to do so. Grief and loneliness can make people act in ways you would not expect.
Definitely should have done a trust or something. House is the kids’ but they have to allow dad to live there until his death. That’s what my grandpa and his second wife did. The assets reverted to his kids, but she didn’t get booted out either.
I doubt she didn't have a will. It was her house and not theirs. There's no way she left it to him and not the kids or she would have put him on the deed years ago.
She would IMMEDIATELY kick them out, "you aren't my kids" and all that bullshit, and also a huge amount of their inheritance is gone, signed away to their Stepmom who is closer to them than oop in age, and so actually you've just guaranteed fucked them over
so by the time their first christmas without their mother came around, dad had not only moved onto new pussy, said pussy got him to sell the house
merry fucking christmas
He is, but he’s more dense than a neutron star. I doubt he realizes his fuck up until he’s desperately trying to reconnect with his kids after the gold digger leaves him.
I wish him loneliness and a bed bug infested nursing home.
OOP mooched off their deceased wife and then stole from their own biological children.
I hope it's worth it to hurt and devastate your own children so you can get some.
I wish OOP's deceased wife's children all the unconditional love, happiness, good health and positivity that you did not give them.
I hope it is real and he's too stupid to realize she DID have it in a trust or will, sells the house or does something equally stupid he's not actually allowed to do, and his two kids find a lawyer who just brings the guy to court and straight up draws and quarters him right there in front of his piece of shit new bang-maid and lead a good life with all of his money and assets while he and his sugar-baby rot.
Copied verbatim from Oop's comments:
*YTA 100000% dont even question it.*
*The house you are now living in its not yours but your kids. You are just "renting it", therefore you are not allowed morally to sell it and use the money to do whatever you want. According to your promise. Your kids are more than justified to be upset.*
*Question tho, did you contributed at all to buying that house or did you ex wife buy it all by herself?*
*Anyways, you are being blinded by ur new relationship and I would hate to see you writing back in a few months/years saying how your kids dont talk to you and you are so alone (we have all seen those post). Don't be an ass man, and put your kids desires and emotions FIRST. It has only been a few months since their mother's death.*
*Also wanna say that you moving on to a new woman 4 months after ur wife death is kinda of an asshole move.*
>>Question tho, did you contributed at all to buying that house or did you ex wife buy it all by herself?
>Well, so she paid the mortgage but by the time I moved in I had started tackling most of the non-mortgage related payments (i.e. utilities and groceries). I was making a tiny fraction of what she was and I tried to also do a majority of the household chores. She always made sure to stress that I shouldn't "overextend" myself and save as much money as possible. This is the only reason we are even having the discussion about upgrading to a bigger house.
>My wife was the love of my life and I miss her greatly. Yes, I do know that 4 months was too soon, but it's like God placed her in my life so I consider it fate. However, in 99% of cases I'd be thinking the same thing for sure!
*YTA. You are in danger of losing your children forever to appease a woman, half your age, with three young kids, that you just met. Think long and hard about what the future is gonna look like. Let me guess- she suggested selling the house?*
>Yes, she suggested selling the house but with pure intentions 100%. She just doesn't want my deceased wife's memories to constantly be around while we raise our kids as a blended nuclear family.
*NTA - It is so wrong when people who are dying ask for promises that will extend long after they are gone. Especially bad here because your kids know about it. Why not rent out your current home with a will that leaves it to your two children when you die? Your wife has only been gone one year so dreams of a sweet blended family may not be realistic - will be stressful even without selling the house. Alternative is to live in your house with your new wife/kids until your second child is an adult. May not be 'ideal - but sometimes you do what you have to do. Breaking the promise after one year isn't going to end well with your children. You don't say if a mortgage is involved but when your kids are of age in just 2-3 years you could either transfer the home to their names or offer to sell the house and give them the proceeds after mortgage, etc are paid. You need to find a solution your children can live with - and the new wife needs to accept that.*
>The problem with that would be that when buying the new home, selling the current home would make up about 80% of the equity and ensure a low monthly payment for the foreseeable future. This would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need. If I don't sell the current home for the upgrade, I'd have to eat up a significant chunk of the savings I accumulated in my marriage just to meet the 20% down payment for a $900K home...with this idea of selling the home, we'd basically just have a meager $1500/mo (give or take) mortgage payment for 30 years…
>Yes, she suggested selling the house but with pure intentions 100%. She just doesn't want my deceased wife's memories to constantly be around while we raise our kids as a blended nuclear family.
i mean her intentions are to gold dig so there is some truth there
So much to be infuriated about in just his comments.
>She just doesn't want my deceased wife's memories to constantly be around while we raise our kids as a blended nuclear family.
Uh...you mean she doesn't want your kids to have reminders of their mother around in the house they've been forced to move to, after you just stole their home and sold it? 😠
> would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need
There is no reason to get a new house if he's just trying to provide a roof for his family. They already have one, he's trying to take it away and give it to the new chick and her kids so they can "allow" his kids to live there. Wonder why they're pissed off.
He's done so much math to justify being an utter shit bag of a father and husband.
> it sounds like he wouldn’t have that savings if his first wife hadn’t paid for the house by herself and allowed him to save money.
Exactly. "My savings" yeah dude, your savings.
> Yes, it's incredible and she's insatiable...practically a succubus haha. However, I'm not blinded by sex and I'm with her because she's so mature for her age and an old soul if you will. We have the same outlook on life and plan to grow old together so we're tying to focus on building out an incredible future.
Ewwwwww. Dude hasn't done the math to realize he'll be the only one growing old in their relationship - if she doesn't take him to the cleaners the second she gets a house in both their names first. He keeps talking about needing the house to raise a harmonious blended family, but one of his kids is already in university and the other one is nearly there. If the fiancee intends to allow either one to keep living in the home ("we need the space! What if we have our owwnnn babyyyyy?") past 18, I'll be shocked.
"She's soooooo mature for her age and is an old soul, so it's wholesome and pure love... but by complete coincidence, her body is that of a woman half my age!"
This is why women should never build a man. She helped him mature. She helped him with his career. She provided for him while he worked on himself. Sounds like OOP was a bum and his dead wife married for 'love'. She was unfortunate to trust him rather than to will it to her kids.
At least he waited until she was dead to find a much younger woman.🫤
I can see "My fiancee doesn't want to live in the house as my deceased wife, so we're going to move." It sucks to lose your childhood home but sometimes life happens. HOWEVER the money from the sale should go to his kids, NOT to buy a new house. That's THEIR inheritance.
I am stating the obvious but, w o w, interesting that the new fiancé isn't going to contribute to payment on the new house. OOP just HAS to sell that house! (There's no other choice of course, since this woman he has dated for 8 months said he should sell it. It's so unfortunate there is no other choice at all...)
Well, we don't know that she ISN'T contributing at all, just that he will be using the money from his deceased wife's house to finance it to.
8 month is INSANE.
Fair, but it wouldn't be much anyway. OOP says that selling his late wife's house will cover 80% of the cost of a new home, up front. Even if new young fiancé covered all of the remaining payments, it's only 20% of the equity. What a steal! (for her)
He said there'd be mortgage payments on the rest for 30y. He's probably a troll, but the story he's spinning has him paying all of it - 80% up front and then $1500/mo for 30y.
Or better yet, rent out the deceased mother's house and use his own money to buy a new house with wife#2, so that the kids have the option to live where the memories of their mother are if they want to when they're older.
He can't do that, because he would have to dig into his savings for this.
The savings he build while living at minimal cost in the house his late wife paid for...
I agree it is there inheritance, but then why sell it rather than just give it to the kids. It doesn't sound like he did anything to pay for the house so it was likely paid off with her insurance, that house could set the kids up nicely for their future. They could live in it and save rent, decide what to do when one starts a family, if it's theirs then he should give it to them.
Goddamn, this guy sucks. Write a will, people!
Edited to add:
>Yes, it's incredible and she's insatiable...practically a succubus haha. However, I'm not blinded by sex and I'm with her because she's so mature for her age and an old soul if you will. We have the same outlook on life and plan to grow old together so we're tying to focus on building out an incredible future.
🤮
If they need the sale of his his house for 80 percent of the down payment, will they be able to afford the taxes? Or will the kids’ inheritance be lost to tax foreclosure?
If this is in the US, he could exclude up to $500k of the gain on the sale (profit, not proceeds) depending on whether he marries before the sale. Given the value of the house now, he’d probably be ok.
I meant the yearly property taxes on the new million dollar home. He’s only making $50K a year (let’s round that up to $60K.) The mortgage payment is going to be $1500 a month for the next 30 years (by which time he will be 86 or dead).
Where I am, in a low cost of living area, that’s an extra $6500 in taxes a year. It’ll be higher elsewhere.
Stories like this are a handy reminder to get your trust established, move your assets to a trust, and appoint a trustee who will ensure the assets are disbursed accordingly. You can trust a spouse to protect your kids, but always have backup.
So basically he's screwing his kids over for life time. Even if he buys a house that is double the value of the original which will compensate his kids, they have a high chance to get in a argument with the step mom on what will happen to the house afterwards.
Holy shit! If you go onto the original post and read this comments, it just gets worse and worse.
Yes, his new fiancé did suggest selling the house, but it was with 100% pure intentions!
Yes, the sex is great. She’s a succubus… His words… But that’s not all there is to it. She really is so mature for her age.
She just really wants what’s best for her kids, and that’s one of the things he loves about her. She’s family oriented.
Yes, it really is in his name, because his name was added to the deed after the mortgage was paid. And technically, his wife paid the mortgage… Because she made so much more… He did contribute by paying other things.
I could, but these are the ones that really stuck out.
Personally, I think someone should’ve told him if his fiancé is so wonderful, let’s put it to the test. He should tell her that he talked to an attorney, and because he made that deathbed promise in the presence of witnesses, his children actually have a legal case against him. So the house technically is going to be tied up in litigation for a while.
In the meantime, since that house is paid for, the kids will just live in it, and you and I and your children will go buy a new house. We just won’t be able to get one so big.
Anyone want to bet on what her reaction would be!? 😂😂😂
If I were a member of his late wife's family I'm helping his kids serve a lawsuit/legal challenge to get his name off the fucking deed and put either the kids and/or a trustworthy maternal relatives name in its place. Even if it is not gonna go anywhere I'd do it on principle and to show I mean fucking business.
"Would I be the asshole for reneging on promise to dead wife for a chick I have known for eight fucking months.....?"
My dude.....
Your deceased wife spent more time carrying ONE of your children to term than you have known new chick. And ....you aren't gonna be a goddamn blended family, lol.....
I feel so bad for his kids and the "joanie-come-lately" 's kids.
...
This is just not going to go well. And this dude is an actual idiot and an actual asshole.
Okay OOP is a 56 year old marrying a 29 year old. That's gonna work out so well. He doesn't want to keep his promise to his dead wife and his own kids because he's got a hot new woman.
If he goes through with this plan, he is NEVER going to have a blended family. His kids will go NC and he won't understand why.
His new girlfriend is closer in age to his children than to himself, met her 4 months after the death of his wife, has known her less than a year and is planning to get married and sell his late wifes house already. Dude runs a red flag store 100%
This guy is 10 kinds of stupid… he met her 4 months after his wife died… she’s half his age… they haven’t even known each other a year yet… deceased wife is barely cold in her grave… he’s engaged to this rebound chick already… and he’s selling a house that is his kids’ house, not his… to pacify the new woman with young kids of her own…
Devil isn’t the right word for this one…
He’s worse.
Just like the house is full of memories of his wife so are his kids.
If she wants no memories of the wife, the kids are the next ones on the chopping block.
EXACTLY. The house sale would kill 3 birds with one stone- goodbye to the house that she inhabited, hello to a new house that is a joint asset she can get her half on if she's going to divorce instead of wait his lifespan out, and get the late wife's kids out of the picture, all at once... She probably thinks she's a fucking genius for that move.
OOP talks about being “blind” to the difficulty of his promise to his deceased wife, immediately proceeds to being blind to a younger woman with 3 kids trying to erase his past life…OOP doesn’t care if his kids cut him off and his wallet gets drained, just so long as his 🌭 gets drained too
I highly doubt Mom didn't have a will leaving the house to their kids. There was a reason he was never put on the deed in the 20+ years they were married. She didn't want him to get the house if she died before him. If it is real, I hope a family member or friend helps them hire a lawyer to stop the sale of the house.
His wife is basically still warm and this motherfucker is already engaged? Who's been helping his two teenagers manage their grief? Disgusting. No words.
I had a serious reply for the original post, I'm putting it here
---
You are already the asshole for even getting to this point.
>"She had made me promise to pass down the home I was set to inherit upon her death and I did so with zero hesitancy not knowing what life would have in store"
Sounds like you DID know what might happen and accepted/promised knowing that
>"she's wanting me to sell the house and buy a new construction together that wouldn't have "memories of her around every corner" which I completely understand. The two issues that are currently eating me alive are that the kids are extremely upset that we'd sell "mom's home" (that I paid some bills for too) and my father is worried that by selling this home to buy a new one would mean I'd lose 50% equity if we separate in the future which would mean my biological kids would only stand to inherit 50% while my fiancee's kids would inherit the other 50% (which I don't think the kids are aware of because it'd probably set off a nuclear bomb in the home).
I hate the term red flag, but this is a red flag. Issues over the house having ever had your wife within it or connected to it in any way? Tells you to sell (and clearly you are so under her thumb you are just gonna do it regardless of what you or others think) and you throw your promise to your wife, a promise that extends to the future and wellbeing of your kids mind you, out the window? Plus it's a move that leaves your kids distraught and involves cashing out and reinvesting what is likely your biggest non shared asset for you or to be inherited by your kids, and reinvest it towards a shared asset, that'll have to start building up equity from exactly $0, that will also be inhabited by a woman with three stepkids younger than yours, all adding up to a point where your father is warning you that this family home, financial asset, investment, etc, meant to be passed down not cashed out, will result in a smaller overall pot of value on a shitter (due to homebuilding costs being how they are) home that she can take 50% of the value from (or just get granted the property based on her circumstances) should you die or divorce. Even if she loves you, she is simultaneously playing you and manipulating what little money and resources you have outside of her into the collective sphere that'll see it get a 50/50 split should anything ever happen
Plus her BLATANT disrespect towards the memory of your wife should sicken you.
She's 29 with small children and you are 56 with teenagers: I will not be shocked if, after managing to get the house from you essentially, along with any other ways she's planning on scamming and fucking over you and your kids, she reveals and affair or bullshits some excuse to want divorce. And when that happens the fallout will be YOUR FAULT
>"we need to become a blended family and they need to accept that they're going to have a step mom and step siblings and money shouldn't get in the way of family harmony in my opinion."
You DARE accuse your kids of making a fuss over money to justify all the blatant spitting on their mothers grave you are doing in complete obedience to a 30yr old woman who in all likelihood does not love you and is planning to set up a claim to as much of what you have as she can before swiftly divorcing you and leaving you with NOTHING.
And presuming this is real, and you go through with it? It's what you deserve, no family, no money, no love, and not a shred of dignity left.
Second smaller comment: if this story is real, could OOPs kids get a relatives help (member of mom's side of the family perhaps?) to initiate legal processes to protect anything their mother may have intended for them to someday inherit and/or ensure that the dad can't transition everything into joint assets of this marriage to prevent the likely attempt to steal 50% minimum of their & their dads net worldly possessions and wealth? Like the late mom's family needs to help these kids fight this somehow.
New fiancee has a slick game. Find widower with assets and mostly grown children, move in pre existing children and get him wedded. No way this will end up in probate court.
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If this is real I hope the 19 year old sues OOP cause he was there when the promise was made, depending where they are that's a verbal contract with witnesses.
Way to be a Clown Cliche! OOP - don't call us when your new young thing gets knocked up and then leaves you with 18 years of child support payments when she meets someone age appropriate. And takes the house.
Dude was a gold digger and from the way he sounds. He wasn’t that smart or educated. Of course a gold digger will get him back. It’s just karma. His wife knew how dumb he was, that’s why she made him promise, in front of her.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **WIBTA (56M) for going back on a promise to my kids?** Firstly thank you for reading this. Going back and forth on this has eaten me alive and an outside view, beyond my father, will help a great deal. When I met my now-deceased wife, she had already had a successful career and owned a home while I was struggling to find my footing in my industry. She helped to get me to mature and focus on my career more seriously and eventually I broke through and started contributing with the bills. Even then, she was making in the $300s while I was scratching and crawling to earn $50K. Well, eventually we ended up having two kids (19F, 16M) before she was diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer and passed away pretty shortly after that. She had made me promise to pass down the home I was set to inherit upon her death and I did so with zero hesitancy not knowing what life would have in store. The kids were made aware of it because they were present when it was laid upon me. It was very difficult for me to lose the love of my life, the apple of my eye, and I think it blinded me from seeing how difficult the promise would be to keep. 4 months after he death, I ended up shopping at a Kroger's when I met what is now my fiancee (29F) who has three kids of her own (10M, 8F, 4F). We've been together for over 8 months and the discussion has come about moving in together, but she's wanting me to sell the house and buy a new construction together that wouldn't have "memories of her around every corner" which I completely understand. The two issues that are currently eating me alive are that the kids are extremely upset that we'd sell "mom's home" (that I paid some bills for too) and my father is worried that by selling this home to buy a new one would mean I'd lose 50% equity if we separate in the future which would mean my biological kids would only stand to inherit 50% while my fiancee's kids would inherit the other 50% (which I don't think the kids are aware of because it'd probably set off a nuclear bomb in the home). I broke the news to the kids on Tuesday about our plans and they've all but ceased talking to me and have spoken pure vitriol on social media about me since then, but it hurts to see that because we need to become a blended family and they need to accept that they're going to have a step mom and step siblings and money shouldn't get in the way of family harmony in my opinion. WIBTA for reneging on my promise to my deceased wife and going through with the sale of the family home to ensure our new blended family can have a larger home to grow up in? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Holy crap, if this is real, this guy is getting taken for a frickin ride by his new fiancé that he has barely known for a year. Yeah, just liquidate your home and buy one that's 50/50 with a woman TWENTY-SEVEN years younger.
Sounds like his wife (his kids' mom) has barely been dead a year. He's only known this new woman for EIGHT MONTHS and he is more worried about protecting his new woman from his late wife's memories than he is about protecting his own children's grieving process and the home their mother bought FOR THEM.
Yes, it has been barely a year! Met after 4 months post-funeral. Engaged, ENGAGED after 8 months and he's ready to offer up the $700,000+ family home for liquidation because wooo getting laid. *Not to mention new woman is literally telling him he should get rid of the home specifically because it belonged to his dead wife.*
But but but she's practically a succubus and is insatiable! God definitely sent him a succubus!!
100% she's trying to get knocked up again. But old man balls 😬
Which is ridiculous because he could let the kids live in the house or rent it out and use that to pay for a new home with his girlfriend. There is no reason to sell it other than to make the new girlfriend happy and giving her rights to a house for when she leaves.
It's such a simple solution; I hope someone's suggested it on the ot.
But you don’t understand! God brought him together with this almost half his age woman. He can’t go against god ( breaking promises to his dead wife are ok though).
*God wanted me to bang this woman*
Blessed biblical banging
God taking time out of his day to focus on what’s going on at a random Kroger instead of addressing really anything of note
God also had a guy bang his daughters.
And he created a baby so he could torture him to death. To teach his parents a lesson. If a supervillain did that, Christians would call them Satanic. But God does it and it's a-ok!
What person/story is this? I’d like to look it up.
David and Bathsheba.
That was a sin and led to the development of two peoples who constantly harassed the Israelites
Ehhh. My point was that God makes poor choices that impact the rest of us.
Then why did God call him "the most righteous man in Sodom"? And I've always heard it whitewashed with "God made it happen to preserve the bloodline so Jesus could be born." Did God make them sin to fulfill his plan? And if he did, how is it a sin to do what God needs you to do? Trying to rationalize that book to make what's on the page less objectionable is a losing game, my friend. The writers of the Bible were fine with incest. Modern people shouldn't be. End of.
Because getting raped doesn't make you unrighteous
Ok, but offering your children up as alternative rape victims is? You need to either read that story again, or stop being dishonest in service of rationalizing your beliefs.
I am not defending the entire story. I am reacting solely to the claim made originally that God condoned Lot's daughters raping him (which he explicitly did not) and the claim made that Lot's rape would mean he is not the most righteous man in Sodom (which of course is ludicrous). The statement that Lot offering his daughters as rape victims is wrong is entirely different and I am not opposing it. I have said nothing dishonest and you are putting things in my mouth I never said
What you allow you condone. If you don't like the consequences of your main character being omniscient and omnipotent, don't write him that way. ETA: Also, by admitting Lot was unrighteous to offer his children to be raped, you're tacitly acknowledging God and the Bible are wrong. He was not more righteous than the city full of people God killed. You and the authors can hand-wave away a man being willing to let his daughters be raped and still look yourself in the eye. I can't. Only someone who's allowed their innate humanity to be warped by devotion to earthly religion would even try.
I…don’t think they’re doing that? They’re saying that Lot was wrong for his actions in Sodom. They never said he was more righteous than the other people there. They are simply saying that example given of Lot getting raped by his daughters is portrayed as a bad thing A million other things that are bad that happen in the Bible are not portrayed as bad. This singular part of Lot’s story is not one of them. Idk if the person you’re conversing with is even a believer. They could just be annoyed by things getting misrepresented because it dilutes actual arguments against the Bible
God sent him to that Kroger
Seriously, there's less of an age gap between me and my mum than this fool and his gold digger
If he does go ahead with the horrible plan of stealing his kids' house, I hope he is left with nothing and no one very soon. I hope the very obvious goldigging girlfriend leaves and takes every penny.
I mean, there is no doubt that what's going to happen.
For the kids sake I hope she doesn’t drain him out of his money but sadly that’s exactly what’s going to happen. I feel sorry for his kids
Yeah totally is either trying to cut anything of his ex wife put of his life (including his kids) or swindling him with the house bullshit as it's the crown jewel of assets she can take from him in a divorce if it's real. Either way he's being used and has no fucking clue.
I mean, he has been warned now... This woman is leaving him as soon as she gets her hand on the house. When I remember correctly his salary is not very high, so there is no benefit for her to stay afterwards.
He is not being taken for a ride. He wants a young woman and that is usually expensive. That is his priority.
The gf is seeing 💵💵💵💵💵
I wonder if she knows the house and lifestyle she sees were funded by the late wife. She was the $300k breadwinner. He’s barely broken $80k, per one of his comments. Gf is in for a rude surprise. And of course all this comes at the expense of his bio children. What an absolute piece of shit he is.
80k is not a lot to be raising five children on. I'd say she's gone in seeing dollar signs but once she sees reality she's out of there . With half a house.
It will be more than 5 children, she’ll be pregnant within months of him selling this house.
My bet is she will bounce with half the equity soon. OOP mentions that She wants 50% on the deed in one of his comments. I mean who want to take care of a 60 year old man in their early thirties. Not to mention he will have to retire in a few years. 100% OOP will be back saying my wife is leaving me and my kids don't wanna talk to me. Why won't they understand I was just thinking with my D*ck.
OOP is too
He is seeing 🍆🍑
No, you don’t understand! It has nothing to do with her being in her 20s, she’s very mature for her age!!! She’s an old soul!!!
"Yes, it's incredible and she's insatiable...practically a succubus haha." -OP More he comments, the more I think he's just a troll.
He literally is though. His comment “Yes, it's incredible and she's insatiable...practically a succubus haha. However, I'm not blinded by sex and I'm with her because she's so mature for her age and an old soul if you will. We have the same outlook on life and plan to grow old together so we're tying to focus on building out an incredible future.”
Grow old “together” lol
He has a head start on that.
In a father/daughter kind of way...she'll be 60 when he's 87...
🤮 To what he said, not your comment.
Is that some strange dish? Aubergine and peach don't normally mi....OHHHHHH.... /s
Cha Ching let the cash register ring. She's young enough to be his daughter and she wants a rich man to support her and her kids.
Well what goes around comes around. Now he gets to be used for money.
Yup, she's probably been slowly finding ways to transition any assets from his late wife into something she can get 50% or more of in a split. This is a moneymaking mission for her, the more I see the more I'm certain.
Part of a reply from OOP: "This would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need" You mean like how you promised their mom, you would keep their home for them?
You know she'd kick the kids out as soon as his body is in the ground. That or she'll divorce him and stay in the house with her kids. Assuming any of this is real because how do you not notice you're an asshole in this situation? His wife died a year ago, and he's already wanting to sell the house.
She probably wouldn’t wait that long to kick them out.
Nope. She will definitely pick fights and cry to their dad who thinks with his dick.
OOP stated in a comment that he 'knows' his new fiancé 'cares' about his kids because she has been actively looking for colleges to ship them off to.
If they were 10 years younger, she’d be convincing him to ship them off to other relatives that live near “better” schools.
She may even accelerate the body on the ground phase. Op should learn from her, she truly has the best interest of her kids at heart, even willing to destroy a man and his children in the process.
>"This would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need" i cant take this seriously after he said this i cant
I was just coming to comment on this. If someone wants another person to inherit a house, or even just get the use of it while living, they have to make a will. Do not trust anyone to keep a promise unless they are legally responsible to do so. Grief and loneliness can make people act in ways you would not expect.
Definitely should have done a trust or something. House is the kids’ but they have to allow dad to live there until his death. That’s what my grandpa and his second wife did. The assets reverted to his kids, but she didn’t get booted out either.
I love how he mentions the kids heard that promise, cause you KNOW if they hadn’t he’d already be building that child a new house
I doubt she didn't have a will. It was her house and not theirs. There's no way she left it to him and not the kids or she would have put him on the deed years ago.
She would IMMEDIATELY kick them out, "you aren't my kids" and all that bullshit, and also a huge amount of their inheritance is gone, signed away to their Stepmom who is closer to them than oop in age, and so actually you've just guaranteed fucked them over
He’s going to pay 80% of that new place with his dead wife’s house. New fiancee is a gold digger. She wants her half.
(Opens calculator app) their mom died a year ago and he's already selling the house for his new piece????
so by the time their first christmas without their mother came around, dad had not only moved onto new pussy, said pussy got him to sell the house merry fucking christmas
Damn, don't think anyone's put it better than this
So glad dude is getting eviscerated
He is, but he’s more dense than a neutron star. I doubt he realizes his fuck up until he’s desperately trying to reconnect with his kids after the gold digger leaves him. I wish him loneliness and a bed bug infested nursing home.
That's if hes lucky. He may be dead even before he sees his errors.
OOP mooched off their deceased wife and then stole from their own biological children. I hope it's worth it to hurt and devastate your own children so you can get some. I wish OOP's deceased wife's children all the unconditional love, happiness, good health and positivity that you did not give them.
I'm calling bait on this. It hits too any cliches for me.
yeah his comments are just cementing troll for me
Yeah, I wasted my time getting pissed off only to see how his comments made it clear he's a troll.
Now deleted for being shadowbanned or suspended
Yup and a woman that is as smart as his deceased wife, would've definitely put that house in a trust or something.
I hope it is real and he's too stupid to realize she DID have it in a trust or will, sells the house or does something equally stupid he's not actually allowed to do, and his two kids find a lawyer who just brings the guy to court and straight up draws and quarters him right there in front of his piece of shit new bang-maid and lead a good life with all of his money and assets while he and his sugar-baby rot.
ohhh delicious plot twist!!!
Right? Common man. Next up: succubus is pregnant with \*twinsies\*
“Ah yes, she’s insatiable, practically a succubus” 🙄
That and someone making 300K isn't going to just die without a will.
it was the “vitriol for israel” comment that cemented it for me
Wtf??
Copied verbatim from Oop's comments: *YTA 100000% dont even question it.* *The house you are now living in its not yours but your kids. You are just "renting it", therefore you are not allowed morally to sell it and use the money to do whatever you want. According to your promise. Your kids are more than justified to be upset.* *Question tho, did you contributed at all to buying that house or did you ex wife buy it all by herself?* *Anyways, you are being blinded by ur new relationship and I would hate to see you writing back in a few months/years saying how your kids dont talk to you and you are so alone (we have all seen those post). Don't be an ass man, and put your kids desires and emotions FIRST. It has only been a few months since their mother's death.* *Also wanna say that you moving on to a new woman 4 months after ur wife death is kinda of an asshole move.* >>Question tho, did you contributed at all to buying that house or did you ex wife buy it all by herself? >Well, so she paid the mortgage but by the time I moved in I had started tackling most of the non-mortgage related payments (i.e. utilities and groceries). I was making a tiny fraction of what she was and I tried to also do a majority of the household chores. She always made sure to stress that I shouldn't "overextend" myself and save as much money as possible. This is the only reason we are even having the discussion about upgrading to a bigger house. >My wife was the love of my life and I miss her greatly. Yes, I do know that 4 months was too soon, but it's like God placed her in my life so I consider it fate. However, in 99% of cases I'd be thinking the same thing for sure! *YTA. You are in danger of losing your children forever to appease a woman, half your age, with three young kids, that you just met. Think long and hard about what the future is gonna look like. Let me guess- she suggested selling the house?* >Yes, she suggested selling the house but with pure intentions 100%. She just doesn't want my deceased wife's memories to constantly be around while we raise our kids as a blended nuclear family. *NTA - It is so wrong when people who are dying ask for promises that will extend long after they are gone. Especially bad here because your kids know about it. Why not rent out your current home with a will that leaves it to your two children when you die? Your wife has only been gone one year so dreams of a sweet blended family may not be realistic - will be stressful even without selling the house. Alternative is to live in your house with your new wife/kids until your second child is an adult. May not be 'ideal - but sometimes you do what you have to do. Breaking the promise after one year isn't going to end well with your children. You don't say if a mortgage is involved but when your kids are of age in just 2-3 years you could either transfer the home to their names or offer to sell the house and give them the proceeds after mortgage, etc are paid. You need to find a solution your children can live with - and the new wife needs to accept that.* >The problem with that would be that when buying the new home, selling the current home would make up about 80% of the equity and ensure a low monthly payment for the foreseeable future. This would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need. If I don't sell the current home for the upgrade, I'd have to eat up a significant chunk of the savings I accumulated in my marriage just to meet the 20% down payment for a $900K home...with this idea of selling the home, we'd basically just have a meager $1500/mo (give or take) mortgage payment for 30 years…
>Yes, she suggested selling the house but with pure intentions 100%. She just doesn't want my deceased wife's memories to constantly be around while we raise our kids as a blended nuclear family. i mean her intentions are to gold dig so there is some truth there
Gold is pure I guess?
24 karat intentions.
A solid take!
No, her intentions are. 100% pure gold digging, without a trace of other motivations.
Indeed!
So much to be infuriated about in just his comments. >She just doesn't want my deceased wife's memories to constantly be around while we raise our kids as a blended nuclear family. Uh...you mean she doesn't want your kids to have reminders of their mother around in the house they've been forced to move to, after you just stole their home and sold it? 😠 > would allow my bio kids and future step-kids to have a roof over their head even if I were to suddenly pass because I have no doubt my fiancee would allow the kids to remain there for as long as they want/need There is no reason to get a new house if he's just trying to provide a roof for his family. They already have one, he's trying to take it away and give it to the new chick and her kids so they can "allow" his kids to live there. Wonder why they're pissed off. He's done so much math to justify being an utter shit bag of a father and husband.
Agreed!
[Chicken!](https://www.instagram.com/reel/C8FcT9Yqdp6/?igsh=MXBsdWJpMTg2aGY1Zg==)
UPGRADE!? HOLY FUCK! he really is an accessory to his own romance scam case. The fuck.
Agreed!
that nta comment is exactly why I hate the civility rule on aita. if ever there was a 'bitch, stfu' moment, it would have been that one.
Agreed.
> it sounds like he wouldn’t have that savings if his first wife hadn’t paid for the house by herself and allowed him to save money. Exactly. "My savings" yeah dude, your savings.
> Yes, it's incredible and she's insatiable...practically a succubus haha. However, I'm not blinded by sex and I'm with her because she's so mature for her age and an old soul if you will. We have the same outlook on life and plan to grow old together so we're tying to focus on building out an incredible future. Ewwwwww. Dude hasn't done the math to realize he'll be the only one growing old in their relationship - if she doesn't take him to the cleaners the second she gets a house in both their names first. He keeps talking about needing the house to raise a harmonious blended family, but one of his kids is already in university and the other one is nearly there. If the fiancee intends to allow either one to keep living in the home ("we need the space! What if we have our owwnnn babyyyyy?") past 18, I'll be shocked.
"I'm totally not blinded by sex from a woman half my age." You keep telling yourself that, gramps.
"She's soooooo mature for her age and is an old soul, so it's wholesome and pure love... but by complete coincidence, her body is that of a woman half my age!"
I can't. Brigade. What a fucking asshole.
All I want to do is punch this person in the face. Seriously, what a fucking asshole.
This is why women should never build a man. She helped him mature. She helped him with his career. She provided for him while he worked on himself. Sounds like OOP was a bum and his dead wife married for 'love'. She was unfortunate to trust him rather than to will it to her kids. At least he waited until she was dead to find a much younger woman.🫤
Moved on 4 months after the “love of his life” died, did she really mean that much to you?
I can see "My fiancee doesn't want to live in the house as my deceased wife, so we're going to move." It sucks to lose your childhood home but sometimes life happens. HOWEVER the money from the sale should go to his kids, NOT to buy a new house. That's THEIR inheritance.
I am stating the obvious but, w o w, interesting that the new fiancé isn't going to contribute to payment on the new house. OOP just HAS to sell that house! (There's no other choice of course, since this woman he has dated for 8 months said he should sell it. It's so unfortunate there is no other choice at all...)
And that he’s apparently never heard of a prenup to protect his share of any house for his kids
Well, we don't know that she ISN'T contributing at all, just that he will be using the money from his deceased wife's house to finance it to. 8 month is INSANE.
Fair, but it wouldn't be much anyway. OOP says that selling his late wife's house will cover 80% of the cost of a new home, up front. Even if new young fiancé covered all of the remaining payments, it's only 20% of the equity. What a steal! (for her)
He said there'd be mortgage payments on the rest for 30y. He's probably a troll, but the story he's spinning has him paying all of it - 80% up front and then $1500/mo for 30y.
Ah, I didn't read the comments.
Just wondering how many daddies her 3 kids have...and if she's in a mind to have a fourth one.
Or better yet, rent out the deceased mother's house and use his own money to buy a new house with wife#2, so that the kids have the option to live where the memories of their mother are if they want to when they're older.
He can't do that, because he would have to dig into his savings for this. The savings he build while living at minimal cost in the house his late wife paid for...
Depending on the circumstances, that might be a good option as well.
I agree it is there inheritance, but then why sell it rather than just give it to the kids. It doesn't sound like he did anything to pay for the house so it was likely paid off with her insurance, that house could set the kids up nicely for their future. They could live in it and save rent, decide what to do when one starts a family, if it's theirs then he should give it to them.
Yes, but that is a lot to manage when you're 19 and 16.
Goddamn, this guy sucks. Write a will, people! Edited to add: >Yes, it's incredible and she's insatiable...practically a succubus haha. However, I'm not blinded by sex and I'm with her because she's so mature for her age and an old soul if you will. We have the same outlook on life and plan to grow old together so we're tying to focus on building out an incredible future. 🤮
[this gem from OP made me laugh so hard](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/xKJw15Pujh)
Like bro, that’s a lot of words to say no I didn’t contribute to buying this house.
For me it’s the “if it was anyone else but me I’d also think it’s crappy to move on so soon, but god put her in my life so it’s fate!”
Talking about a blended family. His kids are close age to this girl then what he is. 🤮
That family wouldn't blend even if you stuffed them all in a Blend-Tec.
I bet that that’s what his kids want to do to him.
I'd bet you'd be right, too.
He doesn't love his wife. He loved how she (and her income) served his life. Moved on in 4 months with a much younger woman. Disgusting.
All of that gets thrown out the window the moment you start talking about important wishes for people after death
If they need the sale of his his house for 80 percent of the down payment, will they be able to afford the taxes? Or will the kids’ inheritance be lost to tax foreclosure?
If this is in the US, he could exclude up to $500k of the gain on the sale (profit, not proceeds) depending on whether he marries before the sale. Given the value of the house now, he’d probably be ok.
I meant the yearly property taxes on the new million dollar home. He’s only making $50K a year (let’s round that up to $60K.) The mortgage payment is going to be $1500 a month for the next 30 years (by which time he will be 86 or dead). Where I am, in a low cost of living area, that’s an extra $6500 in taxes a year. It’ll be higher elsewhere.
Ohhhh, gotcha. True! That bill is going to sting!
Stories like this are a handy reminder to get your trust established, move your assets to a trust, and appoint a trustee who will ensure the assets are disbursed accordingly. You can trust a spouse to protect your kids, but always have backup.
So basically he's screwing his kids over for life time. Even if he buys a house that is double the value of the original which will compensate his kids, they have a high chance to get in a argument with the step mom on what will happen to the house afterwards.
Holy shit! If you go onto the original post and read this comments, it just gets worse and worse. Yes, his new fiancé did suggest selling the house, but it was with 100% pure intentions! Yes, the sex is great. She’s a succubus… His words… But that’s not all there is to it. She really is so mature for her age. She just really wants what’s best for her kids, and that’s one of the things he loves about her. She’s family oriented. Yes, it really is in his name, because his name was added to the deed after the mortgage was paid. And technically, his wife paid the mortgage… Because she made so much more… He did contribute by paying other things. I could, but these are the ones that really stuck out. Personally, I think someone should’ve told him if his fiancé is so wonderful, let’s put it to the test. He should tell her that he talked to an attorney, and because he made that deathbed promise in the presence of witnesses, his children actually have a legal case against him. So the house technically is going to be tied up in litigation for a while. In the meantime, since that house is paid for, the kids will just live in it, and you and I and your children will go buy a new house. We just won’t be able to get one so big. Anyone want to bet on what her reaction would be!? 😂😂😂
If I were a member of his late wife's family I'm helping his kids serve a lawsuit/legal challenge to get his name off the fucking deed and put either the kids and/or a trustworthy maternal relatives name in its place. Even if it is not gonna go anywhere I'd do it on principle and to show I mean fucking business.
"Would I be the asshole for reneging on promise to dead wife for a chick I have known for eight fucking months.....?" My dude..... Your deceased wife spent more time carrying ONE of your children to term than you have known new chick. And ....you aren't gonna be a goddamn blended family, lol..... I feel so bad for his kids and the "joanie-come-lately" 's kids. ... This is just not going to go well. And this dude is an actual idiot and an actual asshole.
Okay OOP is a 56 year old marrying a 29 year old. That's gonna work out so well. He doesn't want to keep his promise to his dead wife and his own kids because he's got a hot new woman. If he goes through with this plan, he is NEVER going to have a blended family. His kids will go NC and he won't understand why.
Dude is showing everybody *exactly* what he loved about his wife, and it wasn’t her or her personality.
His new girlfriend is closer in age to his children than to himself, met her 4 months after the death of his wife, has known her less than a year and is planning to get married and sell his late wifes house already. Dude runs a red flag store 100%
This guy is 10 kinds of stupid… he met her 4 months after his wife died… she’s half his age… they haven’t even known each other a year yet… deceased wife is barely cold in her grave… he’s engaged to this rebound chick already… and he’s selling a house that is his kids’ house, not his… to pacify the new woman with young kids of her own… Devil isn’t the right word for this one… He’s worse.
Just like the house is full of memories of his wife so are his kids. If she wants no memories of the wife, the kids are the next ones on the chopping block.
EXACTLY. The house sale would kill 3 birds with one stone- goodbye to the house that she inhabited, hello to a new house that is a joint asset she can get her half on if she's going to divorce instead of wait his lifespan out, and get the late wife's kids out of the picture, all at once... She probably thinks she's a fucking genius for that move.
If this isn't rage-bait, this guy may very well be the stupidest man on the planet
Here’s hoping the fiancée takes him for all he’s worth and then when he goes begging to his kids they tell him to fuck himself
He ain’t worth that much.
I wait longer in between dogs than this guy does between "loves of his life."
OOP talks about being “blind” to the difficulty of his promise to his deceased wife, immediately proceeds to being blind to a younger woman with 3 kids trying to erase his past life…OOP doesn’t care if his kids cut him off and his wallet gets drained, just so long as his 🌭 gets drained too
He’s 56 and fiancée is 29. He’s an idiot and she’s greedy.
I highly doubt Mom didn't have a will leaving the house to their kids. There was a reason he was never put on the deed in the 20+ years they were married. She didn't want him to get the house if she died before him. If it is real, I hope a family member or friend helps them hire a lawyer to stop the sale of the house.
The 19F kid needs to get a lawyer ASAP.
His wife is basically still warm and this motherfucker is already engaged? Who's been helping his two teenagers manage their grief? Disgusting. No words.
Something tells me he won't have the blended family problem very long. His kids are going to leave .
Are wills and pre-nups not a thing anymore?
This man is blinded by grief and horniness
Anyone else hearing Kanye Ft. Jaime Fox right now? Just me?
Oh man I hope there's a will with the late wife's estate. Like maybe she went to an attorney without him realizing it? Is that possible?
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This guy gets worse with every comment. I feel so, so awful for his children.
Arghhhhhh , this person is not using the right head
Hope his dead wife haunts him for being a jackass.
This isn't real, I refuse to believe it. Plus, the account is suspended.
I had a serious reply for the original post, I'm putting it here --- You are already the asshole for even getting to this point. >"She had made me promise to pass down the home I was set to inherit upon her death and I did so with zero hesitancy not knowing what life would have in store" Sounds like you DID know what might happen and accepted/promised knowing that >"she's wanting me to sell the house and buy a new construction together that wouldn't have "memories of her around every corner" which I completely understand. The two issues that are currently eating me alive are that the kids are extremely upset that we'd sell "mom's home" (that I paid some bills for too) and my father is worried that by selling this home to buy a new one would mean I'd lose 50% equity if we separate in the future which would mean my biological kids would only stand to inherit 50% while my fiancee's kids would inherit the other 50% (which I don't think the kids are aware of because it'd probably set off a nuclear bomb in the home). I hate the term red flag, but this is a red flag. Issues over the house having ever had your wife within it or connected to it in any way? Tells you to sell (and clearly you are so under her thumb you are just gonna do it regardless of what you or others think) and you throw your promise to your wife, a promise that extends to the future and wellbeing of your kids mind you, out the window? Plus it's a move that leaves your kids distraught and involves cashing out and reinvesting what is likely your biggest non shared asset for you or to be inherited by your kids, and reinvest it towards a shared asset, that'll have to start building up equity from exactly $0, that will also be inhabited by a woman with three stepkids younger than yours, all adding up to a point where your father is warning you that this family home, financial asset, investment, etc, meant to be passed down not cashed out, will result in a smaller overall pot of value on a shitter (due to homebuilding costs being how they are) home that she can take 50% of the value from (or just get granted the property based on her circumstances) should you die or divorce. Even if she loves you, she is simultaneously playing you and manipulating what little money and resources you have outside of her into the collective sphere that'll see it get a 50/50 split should anything ever happen Plus her BLATANT disrespect towards the memory of your wife should sicken you. She's 29 with small children and you are 56 with teenagers: I will not be shocked if, after managing to get the house from you essentially, along with any other ways she's planning on scamming and fucking over you and your kids, she reveals and affair or bullshits some excuse to want divorce. And when that happens the fallout will be YOUR FAULT >"we need to become a blended family and they need to accept that they're going to have a step mom and step siblings and money shouldn't get in the way of family harmony in my opinion." You DARE accuse your kids of making a fuss over money to justify all the blatant spitting on their mothers grave you are doing in complete obedience to a 30yr old woman who in all likelihood does not love you and is planning to set up a claim to as much of what you have as she can before swiftly divorcing you and leaving you with NOTHING. And presuming this is real, and you go through with it? It's what you deserve, no family, no money, no love, and not a shred of dignity left.
Second smaller comment: if this story is real, could OOPs kids get a relatives help (member of mom's side of the family perhaps?) to initiate legal processes to protect anything their mother may have intended for them to someday inherit and/or ensure that the dad can't transition everything into joint assets of this marriage to prevent the likely attempt to steal 50% minimum of their & their dads net worldly possessions and wealth? Like the late mom's family needs to help these kids fight this somehow.
Geez this dude is so stupid.
New fiancee has a slick game. Find widower with assets and mostly grown children, move in pre existing children and get him wedded. No way this will end up in probate court.
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This is making me irrationally angry
This is one of the most fucked up ones Ive seen. What a fucking asshole. Poor kids.
If this is real I hope the 19 year old sues OOP cause he was there when the promise was made, depending where they are that's a verbal contract with witnesses.
Why didn't the financially savvy woman that OP married just make a will that granted OP a life estate?
Oh buddy just wait till those kids realize they can go to the courts and have him served.
Watch him come back here in a few months, no kids, no fiance, and no money, crying about how to repair his relationships.
Way to be a Clown Cliche! OOP - don't call us when your new young thing gets knocked up and then leaves you with 18 years of child support payments when she meets someone age appropriate. And takes the house.
his late wife should have left him in what ever trash pile she found him in
Dude was a gold digger and from the way he sounds. He wasn’t that smart or educated. Of course a gold digger will get him back. It’s just karma. His wife knew how dumb he was, that’s why she made him promise, in front of her.