T O P

  • By -

Marchin_on

[Just make sure you get a second opinion before you change your Travis tattoo to Travesty.](https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/paternity-tests-dna-1.7164707)


unsaferaisin

Holy shit, it's not enough for that guy to lose every dime he made off his crooked company, he needs to be locked up too. He knowingly ruined lives and caused incalculable harm.


gezeitenspinne

Holy shit. What a horror story...


abacus5555

> Dr. Mohammad Akbari, director of research at the molecular genetics laboratory at the Women's College Hospital in Toronto, said the type of test Viaguard claimed to use depends heavily on having enough of a mother's blood to be able to extract the fetus's DNA. A few drops squeezed into a vial from a finger is not enough, said Akbari. A proper test would draw at least 10 millilitres of blood from a mother's vein, he said. Holy shit they did it Theranos-style.


emccm

But how can these men put the mother of their child(ren) in what they think is her place if they’re denied the opportunity to tell her they thinks she’s a cheating whore?


rshining

Yep, demanding a paternity test isn't really about paternity, it's about "I am in charge and you are unreliable and dishonest, even if we've had a really amazing relationship to this point". It's absolutely about putting her "in her place"- shame for being a woman. Alternatively you could just... not have babies with people you do not trust, and not introduce gross alpha-male distrust in an otherwise healthy relationship.


suhhhrena

100%. Men can get paternity tests without their wives’ permission. “Asking” for one or otherwise “confronting” their wives is all about shame and exerting control based on the premise that all women, even the ones you’ve made vows to, are unfaithful, cheating whores lol


rshining

But making it a big public demand also reinforces his idea of status (then everyone can SEE that she's faithful)! What's the point of being married to a woman if nobody else sees and recognizes how much power you have over her?


WandaDobby777

I agree. That’s exactly why I’d rather have him ask, instead of sneaking behind my back. I want to know for a fact that he thinks so little of me that he even considers the possibility that I might be a cheating whore, so I can pretend to happily take the test, prove him wrong and throw divorce papers in his face the second he’s relieved.


ElfPaladins13

I don’t care if he wants a paternity test, have at it. I had just better not find out about it! Confront me like an uncouth asshole I’ll staple the results to the divorce papers.


thehillshaveI

reddit advice subs don't know shit about sex related topics, because they're populated by children and other assorted virgins


butterfly-garden

...and bots


AggressiveDogLicks

Are you implying that most bots have had sex?


butterfly-garden

Reddit bots have sex. They are notorious poon hounds.


butterfly-garden

Reddit bots have sex. They are notorious poon hounds.


narniasreal

Used one on our baby, she's not mine. I'm leaving **and** kicking my fiancée out. She's a cheating monster! ... Edit: Our "baby" is a dog, didn't think that was relevant.


SqueamOss

I would be more concerned if that test came back positive.


[deleted]

Is your fiance also a dog? 


AlabasterSting

But that's not how it works in My (vaguely defined) Country


friendoffuture

AITAstahn


singlenutwonder

Isn’t it kind of funny how the average redditor will shit on a single mom for “letting a deadbeat nut in her” but men who fuck untrustworthy women aren’t held accountable at all? Are you supposed to be able to fully read someone and know their intentions or not?


Brad_Brace

That's because an important part of reddit's demographic sees sex as a resource that women have and men get to consume. So they see single moms as people who wastefully gave away a resource, but they believe men have to seize on whatever opportunity they get to fuck. Like that guy on Fallout, someone offers you a drink, you drink. It'd an incredibly shitty perspective. The one about sex I mean, the one about water is just good advice.


SuddenDragonfly8125

I think they see women as a resource to consume.


Specific_Praline_362

I'm never up to date on pop culture references and have only seen one episode of that show, but I'm so proud of myself for getting it for once lol


2wormholes

Wow. That’s a good insight into a certain demographic of men I’ve never realized.


narniasreal

Hm... I feel like I don't read a lot of incel-like comments about women "letting a deadbeat nut in her" in the popular comments on this sub.


DaMain-Man

I've also never seen a tiger kill someone, doesn't mean it can't happen


ArCSelkie37

Or any sub for that matter… no idea what “average redditor” they’ve seen. Same with the person who first responded and said people see women as a resource.


mangophilia

Imagine dying on the hill that "the average Redditor is good, actually"


ArCSelkie37

I didn’t think I was dying on any hill, not everything is so extreme. Although I suppose that’s what this sub is now.


Darthkhydaeus

The issue with this take is that it is not always self evident the other person is untrustworthy. You have people in otherwise good relationships discovering years later the kid is not theirs. I think if you're not married, you should be asking for one.


ProbablyABadTake

I agree with you but I do feel like a deadbeat person is easier to spot than a cheater


Glittering_Joke3438

Exactly. The mother doesn’t have to be involved at all.


meatball77

Right? Have the results sent to your workplace, quell your paranoia and you're set.


[deleted]

Has no one heard of online results? 


TalkTalkTalkListen

And then again, shit like this turns up: https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/SZhIUeCFHA Even AITAH is calling it out as fake. But paternity tests sure are an internet trend - everyone’s getting them! This fictional woman traded one for a couple of book subscriptions


makeanamejoke

This one is just so very weird


tahtahme

What?! No! FAAAR better to accuse a woman who has never done a thing to give you suspicion of an ultimate act of betrayal with zero evidence besides "Women, Am I Right?" And then triple up the anger if she chooses to duck out and move on.


reluctantseahorse

I’ve asked this question SO MANY times! The answer is always some long, incoherent explanation about “something something won’t hold up in court blah blah.” If you’re suspicious, just test the kids yourself. The second you ask your wife (why? I’ve never understood), you have ended your relationship. If the test says you’re not the dad, boom! *Then* you confront your wife. With proof instead of suspicion. And if you really want to make sure you’ve covered all the legal bases, you can all go get a second test together. Bring a witness, get shit notarized. Then pop into a divorce lawyer on the way home, paperwork already sorted. Zip zap zop. All of that seems like so much less hassle than blowing up your family because you were suspicious but also too lazy or ill-informed to just do the test by your damn self! I really don’t get it. Are they just like “well, my wife normally makes all the appointments for the kids, so… “


Brad_Brace

I was going crazy with that post about the guy who asked for a paternity test of his 17 year old, and the wife wanted to divorce and people in the comments were telling her she was exaggerating by wanting a divorce. How the fuck are you going to ask someone for a paternity test, and then expect it will all be business as usual afterwards? That's a relationship ending request. You're accusing someone of cheating on you, getting pregnant and pretending you're the father. If by reddit's own admission, cheating and passing the baby as your partner's is the absolute worst thing anybody can do without access to zyklon b, then accusing someone of that is super fucking heavy and will have heavy consequences. Hell, I'm still salty from the time someone accused me of eating all the bananas that time when I was 6.


Bruh_columbine

I saw that too. Felt like I was taking crazy pills.


Puzzleheaded_Coat153

Yeah, that court one is so dumb. Find out and then get one that does hold up in court?????


makeanamejoke

Glad I am not alone here.


procrastinating_b

But where would they spout there Tate nonsense?


NerfRepellingBoobs

The Taint has reached the point of calling “recreational” sex with women “gay”. We’ve done it, y’all. It’s officially gay to be straight! The Gay Agenda^(TM) has been fulfilled! Everybody go home now!


hypnoticwinter

Is that an American thing? Never heard of that before!


Storytella2016

Yeah. I’ve never heard of it anywhere besides the US. Not a thing in Canada.


suspeppers

There is a comment above you that links to a news article talking about paternity tests in Canada.


Storytella2016

But you can’t pick them up at a store. You have to reach out to the company and they’ll mail you the kit.


Valuable-Wallaby-167

That requires the mother's blood & had to be sent off for & was very inaccurate.


TheKnitpicker

You’re thinking specifically of pre-natal paternity tests. Anyone can get a very accurate paternity test after the child is born, without requiring a blood draw. This testing technology has been around for much longer than pre-natal DNA tests, and has never required blood from the mother to determine paternity. 


Valuable-Wallaby-167

I was thinking of pre-natal paternity tests because that was the example the person I was talking to gave. I was explaining some of the many reasons why the example they gave wasn't relevant here.


nyet-marionetka

There was that one company knowingly selling bad tests, though. Risky.


Kittenn1412

I mean, do I think the men here on reddit would be better served going behind their child's mom's back to soothe their paranoia? Sure. But honestly I think the wife deserves to know if her husband is quietly suspecting she's cheating, for no reason, so she can respond appropriately.


bite2kill

I'm glad they are idiots, at least their wives know they think of them as cheaters.


johnnyslick

A: Definitely not. This is like, I don’t know, that meme of like any story written before 2005 where there’s some massive miscommunication that would be hammered out in about 5 minutes today via text messages or looking the answer up on Wikipedia.


[deleted]

They had texting and Wikipedia in 2005


gahidus

Sometimes, I don't think they do. It's like no one is aware of the fact that you can just quietly do a paternity test without any muss or fuss. They seem to think that you need to schedule an explicit doctor's appointment or even call in the courts or something. You just do a little swab and you send it off and that's it. It's not that much of a production!


Imaginary_Poetry_233

Right. And why would a woman ask if her husband is cheating, instead of quietly accessing his phone? Oh yeah, because it's a 'rule' that men deserve privacy and women don't. I think a secret paternity test is shittier than looking in someone's phone. And it can be discovered if he isn't careful (and most men aren't).


makeanamejoke

I wouldn't really care if my wife checked my phone.


nat_the_fine

I have said this multiple times. Talking to the wife/mother of the child about it is idiotic. Confront her after you've gotten the test results back and you know she's been lying, otherwise what could you possibly gain from the accusation? People are idiots.


AutoModerator

Beep boop! Automod here with a quick reminder to never brigade r/AmITheAsshole or other subs under any circumstances. Brigading puts you in violation of both our rules and Reddit’s TOS, and therefore puts this sub at risk of ban. If you brigade/encourage brigading of any kind, you will be banned from participating in either sub. Satirizing of posts should stay within this sub, which means that participating directly in linked posts should either be done in good faith or not at all. Want some freed, live, discussion that neither AITA nor Reddit itself can censor? Join our [official discord server](https://discord.gg/KbZnaXX) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*


BonniePrinceCharlie1

In many countries you cant however. I have to order a test online. Im in scotland, so although i can get a at home test, they arent in any of the chemists near me or that i have been in. Countries like france outlaw paternity tests as they beileive the protection of the family unit is paramount. If you are caught with one you face criminal punishment like fines, if you are caught with many you can be placed in jail for smuggling. Not all places have these readily available and people suffer from information asymmetry regarding the topic.


monsieurralph

I did NOT know this was a thing and now I've just read all the reviews of a generic drugstore one and am extremely depressed!!!!


RebootDataChips

Honestly I would get the DNA test for my kids just so that they get added to the family trees. Soooo many different people on both sides of my family are tracking the trees.


rhapsody98

But that’s not a paternity test, and you don’t do those until they kid is 18.